Songlines
by SpecialK199
Summary: An alternate version of Midnight Sun, New Moon, Eclipse and beyond ... all from Edward's POV.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight._

**A/N: This is my first vampfic attempt, so please bear with me!**

I glanced at my class schedule and set off across campus.

_And so it begins …_

I'd attended this college 43 years ago, and the campus layout hadn't changed that much over time. I watched the students milling in social groups that broke and reformed again and again, darting away from me like nervous shoals of fish as I approached. No matter how much we tried to blend in, our predatory nature always seemed to trigger an instinctive response.

Decades of this behaviour had acclimatised me to the usual social isolation, but I still felt sorry for Alice. She, more than any of us, yearned for some kind of social outlet. Even though she had endured the purgatory of high school and college numerous times over the decades, she still started each new school with her hopes up, eager to make a new friend. For all that she and Rosalie had bonded as family, Alice still yearned for a deeper sisterly connection. This time, at this college, felt different. In the lead up to the college year commencing, Alice had seemed happier, anticipating something that she refused to share with any of us.

"See you soon, Edward," Alice called, taking Jasper's hand as she began to tow him off towards her first class. "I'm looking forward to hearing all about your first class."

Jasper sighed and shot me a look as he followed in his mate's wake.

"Later," he muttered, his lips a thin line as his nostrils flared in reaction to all the different scents swirling around him. Jasper's reflexes had been honed in battle during the Civil War, and then polished to a hard perfection after his human life had ended. He had occupied himself with years of fighting and killing before he had found Alice and his life had transformed yet again.

Waving them off, I set off towards my first class. A breeze eddied around me as I entered the building, and my head turned as I caught the trace of an attractive scent on the wind. It was more than attractive: it was undeniably delicious. I coughed as I choked back the slight rush of venom that had coated my mouth, wondering what it was that had set it off. As was the routine, we had all taken the precaution of hunting well before going anywhere near the college grounds.

Following the open corridor that ran the length of the building, I strolled towards the lecture hall indicated on my schedule, noting that the same scent seemed to pool at various locations, doubling back on itself before getting back onto the same steady course that I was taking. I shook my head. The scent was so appealing I had started to track it, and I swallowed hard again, shifting the strap of my satchel as I detoured around a group of students.

As I opened to door to enter the hall, the scent hit me again. The air inside was warm, some well-meaning person having overcompensated on the thermostat against the chill of the morning. The smell of so many warm bodies in a confined space washed over me, again combined with the faintest trace of that delicious scent weaving throughout it all. Closing my eyes to compose myself for the briefest of moments, I flickered my gaze around the room, and then chose a seat as far away from everyone else as possible.

Climbing the stairs towards a seat at the back of the room against the side wall, the thoughts of some of the occupants filtered through as I walked past.

_How the hell did I spill coffee on my …_

_I don't think I'm in the right room …_

_Might see if I can get her number at the … _

_No way is he real …_

I tried to hide a smile as I walked past them. No matter how much time passed, student insecurities were all the same. Already they were eyeing each other off, comparing and dismissing based on the superficial veneer of clothes and looks. Even the ones lounging with a carefully cultivated ease were radiating the same fears as everyone else.

Taking a seat, I set my books down beside me and leaned back, shuttering my expression as we all waited for the lecturer to arrive. No doubt Alice would want to know what the class was like if she hadn't looked for herself already, and Emmett would be ready to make a few jokes. I had to agree with the irony though, that one of us was choosing to study in the field of humanities.

Some of the girls were chatting amongst themselves, throwing curious looks now and then as I failed to respond to their flirting the way the other men already had. I stared past them all. Occasionally one of them would make eye contact, and then promptly wish they hadn't, shying away out of reflex and then assuming that their increased heart rate was one of excitement and attraction, rather than what it really was: a primal response based on fear. It wouldn't take long for the rumours to start: muttered comments amongst themselves that my family was strange, that the Cullens were remote and unsociable.

The door to the lecture hall opened, and the latest arrival hesitated at the threshold long enough for the closing doors to nudge against her rump, propelling her a pace forward. She clutched at the shoulder strap of her bag as she consulted a much-folded piece of paper, and then she looked up at the hall, chewing her lower lip. She approached the first row of students and bent forward slightly as she asked them a question, her shoulders relaxing as she received an affirmative response.

Her gaze flickered around the hall, looking for an unoccupied seat, and then made her way up the stairs, her pace slowing as her search remained unfruitful. I leaned back against the wall, thankful that my position allowed me to watch her at my leisure, unlike some of the human boys who turned in their seats to follow her progress. At last she found a seat and dropped into it with a smile of relief.

The lecture hall was filling as more students filtered in and occupied the seats, and the hum of conversation rose to a volume that was sufficient to drown out the buzz of voices in my head. I sighed and closed my eyes, striving for the inner calm that would subdue the internal chatter. The volume began to decrease to a bearable level, and then it happened.

The girl had settled herself into her seat and had taken a notebook from her bag. Now she leaned back in her seat and fluffed her long brunette hair off the back of her neck. The action sent her scent drifting towards me, and I stiffened as my predatory instincts roared to life.

I'd never some across a scent so exquisite. Carlisle had never told me, never warned me that a scent like that could even exist. I fisted my hands against my thighs as I fought for a semblance of self-control. It was all I could to sit still as my hunger fought against decades of discipline and denial. Her scent had ignited a thirst that I thought I had sated with a prodigious hunt a few days prior. I could imagine wrapping my arms around her, hauling her from her seat and sinking my teeth into the soft, warm flesh of her throat. I swallowed more venom again, as I imagined the feel of her hot blood spilling into my mouth again and again.

She shook her head as she laughed off a comment made by the person next to her, and her scent eddied around me once more. I shuddered, and then took a deep breath and held it. It went against my instincts, but it was the only act of self-preservation I could cling to. My lungs needed no air, but like other predators I used the air to track any danger in my environment. And my prey.

I kept myself as still as possible, watching her as she turned her head in response to a comment made by the person sitting beside her. She ducked her head and murmured a response, blood rushing into her cheeks. The sight and scent of it had me biting back a groan. I watched her in profile as she spoke. She was pretty, beautiful even, and there could be no denying her fragility.

I could snap her like a twig, she'd be dead before the fact could even register.

And yet there was something different about this woman. This human.

I watched the student that was talking to her again, leaning forward as he spoke, his expression bright and eager. He was like a child who had just discovered a shiny new toy. He did not seem to realise however, that his new toy didn't seem to be in the slightest bit interested. She was leaning away from him now, folding her arms as her responses became shorter.

The lecturer arrived and the buzz of conversation began to die away as he set up his presentation at the front of the hall. The lights were dimmed and he began to speak, outlining the course requirements for the semester.

After the first five minutes, I stopped listening to the lecturer and began to focus my attention on the woman sitting a few rows ahead of me. The male beside her was still trying to engage her in whispered small talk which she seemed to be doing her best to ignore. Against my better judgement I decided to eavesdrop. All at once every voice that I had been blocking roared into my head at full voice. I winced, trying to filter, to sift my way through the incredible din towards the one voice I sought.

It didn't take long to find the covetous thoughts of the man sitting beside her. Already he was planning on asking her out, wondering if he could tempt her with a coffee after the lecture was over, still not realising that his attentions were unwelcome.

Something was wrong.

The besotted male was broadcasting his thoughts like a clarion call, as were several of the woman sitting around him. Ironic then, that he should devote his attention to the one woman who seemed immune to his overt charms. I looked at her again, to see what she thought of his clumsy attempts so far, but I could hear … nothing. I frowned, and tried again. I could hear her heartbeat, and the steady pattern of her breathing, but her thoughts were silent to me.

_Not possible._

My thirst was a constant burn in the back of my throat, but for the time being my curiosity for her, this ephemeral human, would give a temporary stay of execution.

**A/N: I know this is very short, but I wanted to give you an idea as to what's to come. I hope you like it – all questions and comments gratefully received!**


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight, I am a textual poacher having fun with the charcters._

I watched as the human closed her notebook, gathering her things together as the lecture ended. I had been sitting five rows behind her for two hours and my gaze hadn't wavered for an instant. Countless scenarios had been considered and rejected while my thirst ripped and scorched my throat. Ceasing to breathe had provided a small measure of relief, but the memory of her scent had my instincts raging.

The lecture hall was a hive of activity, and I relaxed my restraint enough to taste the air before immediately regretting it. The human's scent beckoned to me like nothing ever had before. I tried to listen in on her thoughts again, but it seemed that her mind was still a locked door to me. I was intrigued, thirsty and confused by her scent and silence. Decades of enduring endless voices, battling the need for control over my thirst and a sense of denial, and now those elements were combined in one fragile, mortal little body. I couldn't give in to one without destroying the other.

The other students stood and made their way down the stairs towards the exit. I watched as she slung her bag over her shoulder and stood, clutching her notebook to her chest in a protective gesture as the man – _boy,_ I decided after a moment's consideration – tried to keep her in place as he pressed his suit. I leaned forward in my seat to catch her expression of polite exasperation as she turned and shook her head with a smile, and I found myself smiling in response. He didn't get the message. His thoughts were disappointed, but already he was thinking of other strategies to try to win her attention the next time he saw her.

At least I knew her name now. Bella. The boy had been rehearsing all manner of ways to ask her out for most of the lecture. She was biting her lip now, giving him a measure of polite attention as he fumbled for more words.

_Maybe a cd of some music she might like … _

He invited her to join him for a coffee, but she shook her head again and she made her way along the row, out into the aisle to walk down the stairs towards the exit. I watched her leave, my fists still clenched against my thighs. The door closed behind her, leaving only the heady traces of her scent and what promised to be a massive problem for my latest incarnation. I gathered up my books and strolled down the aisle, following the last of the students. A couple of them looked over their shoulders, and at the sight of my glower quickened their steps to stay ahead of me.

_What's his problem?_

_Gives me the creeps …_

I emerged into the corridor and took a deep breath. I could still smell her on the breeze, but thankfully the concentration of her scent was being dissipated in the open air. I tightened my grip on my textbook, sighing as I heard the spine snap, and made my way out of the building into the open air. The further I could get away from her the better. I wondered why I hadn't heard from Alice, given I'd been considering all manner of scenarios to either get the human alone so that I could drain her dry, or trying to decide if I was going to have to find a way to avoid her altogether to protect my family.

I could still smell her. I stopped breathing again, and set off to find the others.

It didn't take long. Alice had chosen a seat at one of the outdoor tables in deep shade. In spite of the morning's tension, I had to grin at her prudence, special abilities notwithstanding. She was talking in earnest tones to Jasper, who was listening with a faint smile. There were lines of tension around his eyes that I could see as I approached, although his eyes were still golden which I knew she would take comfort from. I knew that my own eye colour would do otherwise. Alice looked up at my approach, and waved me over. The gesture was unnecessary of course, but we had trained ourselves to adopt human mannerisms to help us blend in.

"Edward, I'm so sorry-," she began, but I waved her off as I took a seat.

"No blood, no foul. Everyone survived," I said, nodding as Jasper gave me a grimace of sympathy.

"Only just," Alice said, shaking her head. "I didn't even think to look at your-,"

I cut her off again. "Alice it's okay."

"And here I was thinking I was the liability of the day," Jasper said in a dry tone, moving to wrap a comforting arm around Alice's shoulder.

Alice's head snapped up as she glared at him. "Are we going to have _that_ conversation again?"

Jasper sighed, flickering a wink at me, "No, sweetheart."

"Good," she subsided against him, and then studied me again. "How bad was it?"

I shoved my books out the way to lean my elbows on the table, feeling weary. "How much did you see?"

"All of it," she whispered. "There was so much-," her voice trailed off as she gave Jasper a sidelong glance.

"It's okay Alice, been there, done that, getting better," Jasper said, brushing a kiss against her temple. He looked at me and raised an eyebrow in silent query, and I nodded my head in agreement. Whilst Jasper and I had very different histories, our diets had converged in ways that neither of us were proud of. The path to redemption was a long one for both of us.

Jasper gave me a direct look. "So, just how bad was it?"

"I don't think I've ever wanted a human more in my life," I admitted.

"So what stopped you?" Jasper asked, giving Alice an exasperated look as she swatted his shoulder with the flat of her hand. "Come on, it's a valid question."

"Be that as it may," Alice glared, "it's a mean thing to say," she paused and cocked her head, "but I'll got along with it. What stopped you?"

"Nothing," I shrugged.

Jasper's forehead wrinkled, "but you didn't-,"

"I mean what stopped me was literally, nothing. Her mind is a closed book."

Jasper looked sceptical. "You mean there's nothing much going on?"

I shook my head. "I mean I can't hear her, she's completely silent." I drew an idle pattern on the wooden tabletop, then gave a mental curse as I realised I'd used a fraction too much pressure. There in the wooden surface, for all the world to see was the beginning of a cursive letter 'B'. I smoothed it out, but not before Alice gave me a knowing smile.

"You'll be seeing her again soon," Alice said in a confident tone. "You'll be-," her voice trailed off as her eyes stared into the future, "yes, you'll be fine."

I didn't argue. Alice's abilities gave her a level of certainty that we all relied on.

"Do you want to see?" she offered, raising an eyebrow at me. It had taken me decades of restraint before I had achieved some semblance of privacy from the thoughts of others, my family included. At best, their thoughts were a dull murmur in the background which I tried to ignore unless invited, or the thoughts themselves were either too strident or were deliberately directed at me. As soon as she had asked the question the images began to flicker in my mind.

I didn't want to look, but my own curiosity got the better of me.

Alice could be quite cunning when she wanted to be, and it seemed that today was going to be no exception. All I saw was my own face, although it was an image I didn't recognise at first.

I was laughing. I looked happy.

"Alice?" I whispered, look over to see her twirling a strand of short hair around her finger. "I need more than that."

"No, I don't think you do," Alice replied, fixing my eyes with a golden stare. "And don't try to go snooping in my head either," she went on, waving an admonishing finger at me, making Jasper's eyes dance with amusement.

"I'll try," I muttered, running my fingers over the tabletop again, watching the wood smooth under my fingertips.

"C'mon," Jasper remonstrated, reaching over to cover Alice's hand with his own, "_you_ look all the time, why can't he?"

"Well," Alice shrugged, "just because I can't experience surprises doesn't mean that Edward has to miss out. I think this is going to be good for him."

"You think?" I said, sceptical.

"I _know_," she clarified, "so far anyway," she amended, giving me another hard look. "If you can keep control."

"I'll try," I replied. "I have to."

Jasper leaned forward a little, his expression curious. "What was it like," he jerked his head to indicate the direction I'd come from, "when you were in there?"

I thought back to the lecture, and the taste of her scent on my tongue. My throat burned again. Jasper's breath was a sharp hiss between his teeth, and Alice gave him a sharp nudge with her foot. His eyes had gone black, an instinctive reaction to the intensity of my thirst.

"How," his voice was a rasp as he fought for control, "_how_ could anyone resist something like that?"

Alice was rubbing her hand on Jasper's forearm now, shooting me a warning glance as he tried to get himself under control. The breeze had picked up around us, carrying the scents of the other humans that had decided to take a chance on the mild weather and sit outdoors. It took a considerable conscious effort to block the memory of her; her scent, her warmth, the sound of her heartbeat. Instead I focussed on my own moral compass, his golden eyes warm with compassion over the centuries, his immovable faith in me that I appreciated but still couldn't understand.

The image of Carlisle in my mind's eye grounded me, and my throat relaxed somewhat, and with it, so did Jasper. The two of us exchanged a long gaze.

"Now you know how I resisted," I said, "I had to. For all of us."

"We'll see," Alice replied.

**A/N: I know it's a short chapter, but given I'm working on two entirely different stories at the same time, I just don't have it in me to write epic chapters for both! Having said that, the chapter length of this story will no doubt pick up as it progresses. Baby steps .. **

**Reviews = love/like/let me know!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I'm just playing …_

**Ch3**

Her mind was still a tantalising mystery, but I was finding out more and more by the day. Her name was Isabella, although she preferred to be called Bella by everyone she met, and she shared an apartment with a friend a few blocks from campus. It had become a part of my morning ritual, to watch them arrive in the parking lot each morning, the pair of them usually laughing about something as they went their separate ways to class. Her friend's name was Angela, and I found her thoughts to be refreshingly kind compared to the usual dross I was assaulted with on a daily basis.

Leaning against my car, I watched Bella as she tried to balance her books against her hip while she unlocked the door of her truck. She looked up as her name was called, and I enjoyed watching the smile of recognition that lit up her face. She threw her books into the truck and waved, leaning against the open door as Angela approached. The two of them exchanged a few words, Angela gesturing back towards a young man waiting beside his car who acknowledged them both with a broad grin. Bella's gaze flickered over Angela's shoulder before she nodded at her with a knowing smile. I was on the other side of the car park but their words carried to my sensitive ears clearly.

"He's asked me out to a movie," Angela said, hugging her handbag to her chest with shy excitement.

"Angela that's fantastic," Bella said. "Have a great time."

"Thanks, Bella," Angela smiled her thanks. _I can't believe he asked! _"Do you think I look okay?"

"You look fine, you always do," Bella assured her, "now go on, he's waiting for you so you go have a good time."

"Okay, I'll see you later tonight," Angela smiled and then turned back towards her waiting beau.

"Oh, and Ange?" Bella called, waiting for her to turn back, "I won't wait up," she added, watching as Angela blushed.

I watched Bella's face, studying the emotions flickering across it as she watched Angela set off on her date.

"Still no luck?" I turned to see Alice approaching. "Don't worry Edward, you'll get some answers soon." She glanced over at the couple were now getting into the car. "They're going to have a great time, and so," she gave me an arch look, "so will you in good time, so stop worrying."

"Who said I was worrying?" I countered, stopping as Alice showed me a vision of myself as she had approached the car. I had been frowning, glaring almost, as I watched Bella get into her truck and leave.

"It really bugs you doesn't it," Alice said as she opened the back door and slung her bag inside, "her silence."

"You have no idea," I said absently, watching as the truck rounded a curve and disappeared. "Where's Jasper?"

"He's in a debate with his history lecturer, you know how he loves to wind them up about inaccuracies in the set texts," she smiled, and then looked at Bella and then myself with a considering gaze. "You know, if you wanted to get an inside track into her mind you have options," Alice countered.

"Really, and what would they be?"

"Look," Alice said, and projected what she could see.

I looked at what she offered, and then glanced at Alice in disbelief.

"You can do it, Edward, I have faith in you," Alice said.

"I'm glad someone does," I said, seeing Jasper in the distance as he rounded the corner and walked towards us looking pleased with himself.

"Hey," I said in my normal speaking voice, knowing that he'd be able to hear me. "So did you correct some wrong impressions?"

"Sure did," he replied, "although I sometimes wonder just how many times I'm going to have to repeat myself before it starts to sink in."

"You know, you could always write a book or two on the subject yourself. Consider the possibilities," I suggested.

"Two words, Edward: paper trail," Jasper said, getting closer.

Alice was leaning against the car and rested a hand on her hip, smiling at her mate as he walked up to her and pulled her close to place a gentle kiss on her brow. "Good day babe?"

"The best yet," she replied, shooting me a stern look. "Are you still behaving yourself?"

I held my hands up in surrender. "No peeking unless invited, just like we promised."

"Good," she nodded with satisfaction. "Keep it that way."

"Is that still working?" Jasper looked at me with surprise, "how are you doing it?"

"It's not without effort," I admitted, opening the car door and getting in.

"I hope it's worth it," Jasper answered, climbing into the back seat.

"Oh it will be," Alice chimed in with a pleased smile from the passenger seat, "I've seen it, and by the way, Edward," she said, leaning across the console to get my attention, "that idea you had earlier? Tonight's good."

The drive home presented its usual level of frustration until we cleared the town and I was able to drive at a more satisfying speed.

"Leave the car outside, Edward," Alice advised as we pulled up at the house, "you'll be going out later."

"You're really enjoying this aren't you?" Jasper observed in an amused tone as we got out of the car.

"Absolutely," Alice smiled, setting her books on the roof of the car and throwing her arms around her neck as she offered herself up for a kiss.

I watched as Jasper smiled and took Alice up on her offer, and soon they were lost in each other. Jasper was the emotional barometer of the family, so he more than anyone else was enjoying the afternoon's happy climate. Leaving them to it, I let myself into the house and strolled into the living room to see Emmett relaxing on the sofa watching a sports channel.

_Hey._

"That's the best you can manage?" I responded to his mental greeting as I dropped onto the other end of the sofa.

"It's a start," Emmett shrugged as he reached for the remote, "you wanna watch something else?"

"No," I waved my hand at the remote, "I'm good. I've got something I want to work on."

Emmett grunted. _The same thing you've been working on all week?_

"Yes," I said, giving him a frustrated look which made him laugh. "What?"

"Nothing, Bro, I just like making you work for a conversation instead of taking the easy way out sometimes."

"Thanks," I replied in a dry tone.

_Anytime_, he replied with a grin that matched my own, and then looked up as Rosalie entered the room.

"So how's your little pet?" she said, dropping carelessly onto the couch beside Emmett and reaching for the remote, growling as he held it just out of reach.

I tightened my lips against the ready retort and clenched my fists. "She's fine."

Rosalie gave me a sidelong look. "So you're not denying she's your pet, interesting." She leaned against Emmett, who was suddenly devoting all of his attention to the football game.

"Rosalie, how many times do we have to go over this? She's not my _pet,_" I said, spitting the word out with distaste.

"Then what is she, other than the snack you want but can't have?" Rosalie combed her fingers through her hair and began to twine some of the long golden strands around one of her fingers.

"I don't know," I admitted at length, watching as she had the grace to look surprised.

"Really? Then do you call what you've been doing?" Rosalie swatted at Emmett, who was running his hand up and down her side as the cheerleaders on TV did their thing. "Alice tells me that you're practically shadowing her at college, mooning over her from afar, what's it going to be next?"

"You tell me," I said, heading towards the stairs, "you seem to know everything."

"No, you're mixing me up with Alice," Rosalie answered, turning her attention back to Emmett with a warm smile and cuddling closer, coming her fingers through his short curls as he shot me a sheepish grin.

I paused on the stairs as I glanced back at them. Rosalie was certainly happy this afternoon, perhaps Jasper had been picking up on that as well.

"What about you two, how are the newlyweds?" I asked.

Emmett gave Rosalie a proud look. "Over 70 years and still going strong, how about it Rose, I think we're getting serious."

Rosalie was all but purring with satisfaction on the sofa beside Emmett.

"Dare I ask?" I said, pausing to look at the pair of them.

"He killed me a deer," Rosalie said, "a big one."

I cocked at eyebrow at Emmett.

"What can I say?" he said with a modest nod, "I'm a romantic."

Rosalie shot me a look of exasperation as I snorted before grabbing Emmett by the scruff of the neck and pulling him in for a kiss that rapidly became heated. Emmett broke it off when I groaned and turned to make my way upstairs to my room.

"Don't knock it, Bro," he called to my retreating back. "You know you want it too." I heard a slap as Rosalie cuffed him again. "Not you babe, the human."

"Just as well," she muttered, "I know Carlisle had plans but you're the one that I want."

"Now there's a movie we haven't seen for a while," he said before Rosalie kissed him again to shut him up.

I got to my room and set down my books, closing the door behind me in a bid to muffle the noise from downstairs. Rosalie and Emmett were getting more enthusiastic on the couch, and I heard the approaching footsteps of Alice and Jasper as they made their way to their room. Carlisle was working a late shift at the hospital, which meant that Esme would visit him later, ostensibly to deliver dinner. I sat on the leather chaise with a sigh, gazing at the wall of shelves that held my music and book collection. Going by the sounds I could now hear from the nearby bedroom as well as downstairs, I was in dire need of distraction this evening.

Maybe I should go out. As soon as the idea occurred to me, I saw Bella in my mind's eye. I wondered what she was doing now. Perhaps she was home alone.

_Do it, Edward_, Alice's mental voice encouraged before slipping back into the honey hued tones that characterised most of her time with Jasper. I hastily blocked her as best I could.

So there I sat, along in my room, with my elbows on my knees, rubbing my palms together while I considered my options. Could I go and see Bella? I wanted to. Oh how I wanted to. And after all, Alice had checked, so with the situation as it currently was all signs were good. I looked at my watch: time bore little meaning for us, but it helped us track human expectations. I wondered how long Bella would spend on her human evening rituals, as I got up and made my way up to the third level of the house for an evening ritual of my own. Closing the attic door behind me, I crossed to the piano and took a seat, brushing my fingers reverently across the keys before I began to play, letting the music wash over me.

I could play for a few hours before going out. I nodded to myself, decision made as my fingers flew across the keys, music rippling across the room.

I was going to see her tonight.

**A/N: **


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight._

**Ch4**

I argued with myself as the car devoured the miles all the way in to town. I didn't know why I was doing this; all I knew was that I wanted to see her face again. Now it was nearly midnight when I parked the car a street away and made my way to where she lived. The apartment was dark, and I could make out no conscious thoughts nearby. It seemed that for the most part all the humans in the vicinity were asleep. I stood concealed behind a van parked at the curb outside and considered my options.

Getting into the building would be straightforward enough, but the door to her apartment would be locked. I had no desire to leave a broken door lock in my wake, which would both advertise my presence and scare both women the following morning when they discovered the remains of their home security. The building was old, the outer brick walls decorated with plaster and stonework around each window. Perfect. I walked around the building and glanced up at her apartment window, and jumped. I scaled the brickwork and tested the bedroom window. As I had suspected and hoped, the window had no lock. It was the work of a moment to ease it open and slip inside.

Her scent wrapped itself around me the instant I slid open the window, drifting over me in a glorious wave to beckon me in. I swallowed hard against the surge of venom in my mouth as I stood motionless, watching her as she slept with delicious abandon, Her legs were tangled in the bed sheets, and she clutched a pillow to her chest as if seeking comfort. Her heartbeat drummed a soothing beat against the silence of the room as her scent was carried to me by the puffs of her breath. After a long moment, I realised I could unclench my fists. My instinctive reaction to her scent was ebbing as I allowed myself to acclimate.

The room was neat, she was someone in the habit of putting her clothes and shoes away, but her study desk was a different story. Books and papers were scattered and piled seemingly at random, although I had no doubt that she could be able to lay her hands on what she wanted without an instant's thought. I picked up random pages covered with her looping scrawl: summaries of study texts, an incomplete shopping list, notes to remember lectures and books she had loaned. There was order to her chaos, and I found myself smiling as I sifted through the detritus of her life. The room was decorated in a style that was obviously dictated by a student budget, but it was tasteful all the same. Cheap matching frames held artful prints and cards that provided a splash of colour on the walls, along with a few random photos on the bookshelves. It appeared that her main passion however, was for the books themselves. They were everywhere: on the desk, overflowing the small bookshelf beside it, stacked in piles beside and beneath the bed. I smiled, thinking of the bookshelves that dominated my own room, recognising our common bond.

Standing at the foot of the bed, I studied her sleeping form. What the hell was I doing here? I felt foolish for allowing my curiosity to rule my head like this. I was behaving like a Peeping Tom, I was far worse than that. This was stalking behaviour and I was sickened at the level I had stooped to, all in a bid to satisfy my ego. I stood motionless for a long moment, hoping to hear her thoughts, but again there was silence. Decades of endless babble and at last I had found the peace and quiet I had longed for, only to be thwarted by it.

There was a chair in her room, and so I sat, leaning forward with my elbows on my knees, chin in hand as I studied her. Since I had noticed her in the lecture hall, I had done my level best to ignore her. Her scent had hit me like a battering ram, and it was as if I had been staggering around punch-drunk ever since. I had avoided eye contact, studying her from afar, trying to fathom what it was about her that had so many of the young men so keen to break past her reserve. I had seen her face from the minds of her classmates, assuming that her looks were polished by desire and rose-coloured glasses. Now she was only a few feet away I could look my fill. Had I really thought her average looking? Her hair was a dark tangled web around her face and pillow, gleaming against her pale skin. Her features were relaxed in unconsciousness; her lips slightly parted, her eyelashes fluttering as her mind shifted into REM sleep. I leaned forward in my chair, frowning with concentration. I couldn't even hear her dreams.

I wavered, unsure what to do.

It was impossible for me to hurt her. Now that I knew a scent such as hers could exist, I couldn't imagine my world without it. I wanted her more than I had ever wanted any human. My mouth watered again, and I swallowed the venom down, ignoring its sickly sweet taste.

I looked at her face again. Whatever she was dreaming about, it wasn't peaceful. She was frowning in her sleep now, a small crease appearing between her brows, the kind Esme called the 'I want' line. A breath huffed from between her lips.

"Okay, Mom," she muttered.

My curiosity flared, followed by a surge of self-loathing. Her mind was closed to me, but she had just unknowingly offered me another way in. Peeping Tom, indeed. I shook my head in disgust, and then stood up and stepped towards the window. It gave a faint creak as I slid it further open. I would have to remember some oil for next time, and then shook my head again. Next time? I had to get out of here. I braced my hand on the window frame, preparing to jump out to the ground below.

"Stay," her voice was stronger this time, and my head whipped around to look at her. I froze, looking at her eyes that were still closed. Had she seen me?

She sighed, shifting restlessly before rolling onto her side, a hand fisting the comforter convulsively.

"Please stay," the words were barely a mumble, but I heard them with perfect clarity.

Moving soundlessly I knelt beside the bed, my head level with hers.

"I'll stay," I whispered, my breath fanning across her face.

She smiled, her body curling unconsciously towards me as her eyelashes stopped fluttering and she slipped into a deeper sleep.

I stayed kneeling beside the bed for a long time before I remembered where I was and made my way dazedly back to the chair. I sat with my head in my hands, my mind reeling with possibilities. My life had been unending, unchanging for decades, and now I felt as if I was standing inside a hurricane, the winds of change whipping and snapping at me, demanding action.

She was sleeping peacefully now. I sat and watched, almost drunk with the sight of her. The burn that her scent had ignited was a persistent irritation at the back of my throat, and yet now it was the least of my worries. I took a deep breath, feeling her scent burn its way through my body.

Everyone in my family, myself included, had been in stasis the moment we had each become vampires, our mortality burned away by the fires of transformation. Change for us was rare, but when it happened it was permanent. It had happened like that with Carlisle, a decade later with Rosalie, and the change was love. It had been over eighty years since Carlisle had found Esme, and he still looked at her with the dazzle of first love. Rosalie was the same with Emmett, her love a fierce and protective animal that would never cower, never hold back. Their love would always be like that for them.

And now at last I understood. It would be like that for me too.

I sat watching her sleep until the sky began to lighten.

* * * * *

I got home just after Carlisle had left for the hospital, and changed my clothes quickly. Esme watched me come back downstairs with questioning eyes. She could see the light in my face, the change in my mood, but kept her questions to herself. I gave her a brief nod, thanking her for her tact, unsure what I could have offered by way of explanation.

Alice appeared at the top of the stairs and gave me a beaming smile. She flew down in a blur of speed and stopped in front of me with her hands on hips.

"So, can I talk to her now?" she challenged. Esme's eyes widened as she looked at me with the beginnings of a smile. My solitary state had worried her ever since she had joined the family.

"Not yet," I replied through gritted teeth, glaring at her for exposing what had until now been kept quiet.

Alice gave me an unrepentant grin, turning towards Jasper with a smile as he appeared beside her in the living room, and slid her arm around his waist. "It won't be long now," she announced with satisfaction. "You're going to love her," she nodded towards Esme.

"Really?" Esme breathed, and she stepped towards me to take my hands in hers, her eyes shining. "Edward, this is wonderful."

"Don't you think you're getting ahead of yourselves?" I protested, sighing as Jasper began to laugh.

"You don't mean to say you want to bet against my girl?" he said, nodding his head towards his mate, who nuzzled into his neck with a purr.

"You're that sure of yourself?" I asked Alice, hating the uncertainty I could hear in my voice.

Alice glanced back at me and nodded once. It was enough.

I looked at my watch and felt a surge of frustration. I didn't have to be on campus for another two hours. Two hours of waiting until I could see her. Jasper gave a low growl, and I looked up in surprise.

"Sorry," he said, pulling Alice closer and rubbing his hand up and down her arm in a gesture meant to reassure, "it wasn't me."

"Oh," Alice said in understanding. All eyes turned to me. "Maybe we could go now. You know, hang out," her nose wrinkled as she gave me a mischievous wink. "You never know who you'll run into after all." I stared at her, evaluating the options. Alice's eyes flickered quickly, and I knew she was doing the same.

"Done," she said with satisfaction, "and I'm driving."

Jasper winked at me as he allowed himself to be tugged towards the door. "You heard the lady," he murmured.

I watched as Alice moved with determination. It seemed that all roads lead to Bella.

I followed willingly.

**A/N: After Take the Cake, these chapters seem ridiculously short, but I'd rather post something than nothing at all! As always, reviews = love.**


	5. Chapter 5

_**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight**_

**Ch5**

Alice pulled the Volvo smoothly into a vacant car space, flicking the keys to me as she got out. It was rare for me to let anyone else drive my car, but giving in to her on occasion made her happy, so who was I to deny that? Besides, a happy Alice meant that she may be a little more forthcoming about Bella, a situation where she and I both knew that she had the upper hand.

"She works in the campus bookstore," Alice informed me as we began to walk across the car park towards the cluster of buildings.

"You've seen?"

"I've shopped," she replied, reaching for Jasper's hand, "we did need textbooks after all."

"I thought you'd gotten them online," I mused as I matched her pace. It was like being an Olympic athlete condemned to compete in a sack race. Walking at human speed was barely tolerable at the best of times and today seemed even more difficult.

"Nope," she was looking decidedly pleased with herself now, "I decided to go to the bookstore a while ago."

I looked at her as suspicions began to form, "Really? When, exactly?"

She gave me a sidelong look as she moved closer to Jasper who shook his head in amusement and kept walking. "When we made the decision to transfer here," she admitted at last.

That had the effect of stopping me in my tracks. "You've known for months and you didn't tell me?"

"Well what would you have done if you'd known?" she challenged, "Enrolled at another college? I didn't want that, Edward," she said, reaching out and putting her arm through mine, towing Jasper and I along like a determined tugboat. "I wanted us together, like a family."

"Yeah, but-," I didn't quite know what to say. She had known about Bella all that time and hadn't breathed a word, hadn't let a single thought slip. My admiration for her increased; the control she had just revealed was astonishing.

"Think about it," she went on, "Emmett and Rosalie get to play newlyweds; if you had gone somewhere else Jasper and I would have been lonely." Jasper gave a quiet grunt at this statement, although his amusement was cut off as Alice elbowed him for quiet. "She's working this morning and then you'll see her again at the lecture," Alice stated as she gave me a gentle shove. "Jasper and I will be in the library. We'll see you there afterwards so you can tell us all about it."

Jasper shot me a grin as he and Alice began to walk away in a direction different to mine. I kept walking without really considering what I was about to do, although as my thoughts caught up my pace began to slow. Watching her sleep had been one thing but engaging her in conversation seemed to be quite daunting by comparison. Could I really do this? I thought about her unconscious plea. She had asked me to stay. At the time I had convinced myself that she was referring to me, but she could have been dreaming about anyone. I shook my head. This was a foolish venture.

_Edward_, Alice's voice in my head held a distinct warning tone. _Don't you dare back out. _Sighing, I turned back to the path that would lead me to the bookstore knowing full well that I desperately wanted to see her again, and hating myself for it all the same.

* * * * *

It was mid-morning and already the bookstore was a hive of activity as I stepped through the metal detector at the entrance. There were no warning sirens or alarm bells to tell the humans inside that a predator had just entered their midst, but the crowds parted all the same. Without even looking up from their browsing people stepped aside to let me pass, shifting out of my way seamlessly in unconscious avoidance, whilst denying the humans around them the same ease of passage. I could not see her, but I knew she was here. Her scent wove around the bookshelves, pooling here and there as she had traversed the store. I stopped at a bookshelf and selected a title at random staring blindly at the page as I allowed my mental barrier to soften as I listened in to the people around me.

_Another fifty bucks just because it's the revised edition?_

_Stanley ... Stansfield ... Stansford ... out of stock ... dammit!_

'_Textual Poachers' offers an ethnographic account of a particular group of media fans ... _

_Hot from the back I wonder if ..._

I looked up and saw a woman who had been eyeing me off suddenly away break her gaze and look flustered. She smiled and glanced back at me with what she obviously hoped a 'come hither' smile which faltered when I refused to take the bait. She loitered a few minutes more before giving up and moving on, her thoughts going back to the book she had originally been seeking.

"Hi there, can I help you?" the voice appeared at my elbow with no prior warning and I turned in surprise. It was Bella.

"Uh," I stared at her, completely unprepared for this encounter. I had thought to watch her in her work environment for a while, never dreaming that she would seek me out. She was even more delicate than I had remembered; her head barely reached my shoulder, pale ivory skin with a light dusting of freckles across her nose and cheeks. Her eyes crinkled as she gave me an engaging smile. I watched as colour bloomed in her cheeks, and realised that her reaction was because I was staring.

I reminded myself to blink.

"I'm just looking so far, thanks." I felt unaccountably relieved that the words had come easily, banal as they were.

"No problem," a carefree wave of the hand. "Just let me know if you need a hand finding anything." Another smile and she was gone, moving on to the next customer. I slid the book back onto the shelf as I watched her stroll around the store, completely at ease in her environment as she answered questions. She spoke with the kind of friendly banter that I envied, and she seemed to openly share everything that was hers to offer, and perhaps because of this there was always someone in need. She couldn't seem to walk more than a few feet before someone else stopped her, and yet she had a smile for everyone.

Another familiar scent entered the store and I raised my head again as I tasted the air; it was her flatmate, Angela. I watched as she stood near the doorway scanning the store before spotting Bella and walking towards her. Bella looked over and waved as she kept talking to the customer she was dealing with. When she was free, she gave Angela a quick hug of greeting.

She was a tactile person. That could be a problem.

"It's the dating girl," Bella was teasing, "how was your breakfast with Ben?"

"Wonderful," Angela admitted with a smile as she dropped her bag at her feet and leaned against the large bookshelf beside her, "he's a really nice guy."

"Good to hear," Bella nodded in approval, "you deserve nothing but the best."

"Now we just have to find someone for you," Angela continued, ignoring Bella's groan.

Although I could hear them perfectly well from across the store, I found myself edging closer to their conversation all the same. I stood an aisle away with nothing but a couple of bookshelves separating us, luxuriating in the scent that surrounded Bella in a delicious cloud. I dipped into Angela's thoughts and found myself regarding Bella through her eyes. Angela's entire demeanour even her thoughts, were kind. She truly wanted to see the best in people and right now she wanted her friend to be happy.

Bella wasn't seeing anyone. I felt a surge of hope as I realised she was available, which I promptly quashed. Ridiculous to think of a human in that way, and yet I couldn't stop listening; couldn't make myself leave the store just yet.

"Angela, I beg of you, no set-ups," Bella said, and I could hear the warning in her voice.

"I'd never do that to you," Angela protested, "but you have to at least put yourself into different environments now and then."

"Whatever." Bella sounded resigned now, and so Angela pressed on.

"We're all going out for drinks tonight to get the weekend started, why don't you come along?"

"I don't know-," Bella sounded like she was hesitating, and Angela was quick to take advantage.

"Oh come on … it won't be any fun without you." Angela pleaded. "You never know, Bells, you might even enjoy yourself." A face flashed into Angela's mind, someone she thought might be good for Bella. A low growl rumbled in my chest before I could stop myself.

_Mine_.

"If I say yes, will you stop looking at me like that?"

Angela squealed and gave her a hug. "You won't regret it. We're going to have a great time."

"Okay," Bella was laughing at Angela's enthusiasm now, "you know it's just drinks, right? It's not a life changing event."

"You never know," Angela replied. "Listen, I've got to get to class, I'll see you at lunch?"

"Will do," Bella answered, reaching up to fluff her hair off the back of her neck. The movement sent a wave of her scent towards me, and I swallowed hard. I watched Angela leave the store with a smile on her face and then strolled towards the end of the aisle. The lure of her scent aside, I wanted to be closer to her. The thoughts of the customers around me were an irritation and I mentally swatted them aside, listening to the only element of Bella that I could hear and the others couldn't: her heartbeat. The steady beat of it was a soothing rhythm that I could listen to all day. The more I watched her, the more her idiosyncrasies became apparent, the details of which I committed to memory. The way she interacted with people, friends and customers alike told me more about her than her friends would ever know. How could it be that no-one seemed to notice how different she was? I traced a finger along the book spines on the shelf in front of me in keeping with my charade as a customer, watching from my peripheral vision as she saw me and to my astonishment, stepped closer.

"Still here I see," she said with another smile. I listened to her heartbeat increase as she looked at me. "Is there something in particular you're looking for?"

If only she knew. Had I ever known that a scent like hers could have existed I would have combed the world until I'd found it. Instead the fates – with the assistance of Alice - had drawn us together.

"Oh I've found it," I assured her, watching her blink as my breath washed over her face. Her features slackened infinitesimally and she leaned closer, turning to look at the book I had paused at and reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear at the same time. I clenched my jaw. Her movement had bared her neck to me and I could see a vein throbbing behind her ear, taste the scent of her blood on the air as her heartbeat beckoned me. I was so fixated by the sight of it that for once I didn't hear a word she said.

It took the space of a second to consider my options. There were twenty-five people in the store, innocent bystanders that I would have to kill if I gave into my thirst. They would not be allowed to live, having seen what they would see if I drank from Bella. I mentally flinched away from this. Even at my worst, I had never killed on such a scale, and yet here I was almost considering the scenario. And yet …

If I grabbed Bella, I would have perhaps fifteen seconds at best before others in the vicinity reacted as they realised what was happening. Bella wouldn't make a sound. I could kill her quickly before the fact she was going to die even had a chance to register in her mind. Still, I would have to leave her, let her body drop to the ground while I blocked the exit. Valuable seconds would be lost as I chased down the other humans in the store, trapping and killing them. It would be chaos; there would be screaming, a lot of noise, and someone would be bound to hear. In the meantime, Bella would be on the floor, her blood cooling. That was unacceptable. So the witnesses would have to be killed first then.

I mapped it out in my head. Starting from the furthest point in the store I could approach people from the right, which would mean I was coming up on their blind side. Five seconds would see twenty of the humans dead with minimal sound. The remaining five customers were in the same aisle as Bella. I would have to work my way towards her. I could do it in a matter of seconds, but it would be long enough for her to perhaps sense what was happening, to turn her head and see her death coming towards her. The spike of adrenaline in her system would add a sweetener to her taste as I sank my teeth into that warm pulse in her neck, feeling her human nectar spill down my throat.

Someone dropped a book on the floor, and the noise was enough to bring me back to the present. She was staring at me, her warm smile beginning to falter.

"I'm sorry," I said, snapping back to attention, "what?"

She blushed and it was all I could do not to groan. This was getting worse by the second. "I was complimenting you on your choice, _"Twenty love poems and a song of despair_ by Pablo Neruda. It's a beautiful book." She glanced back at me, her eyes going wide as she saw the hunger that was no doubt etched on my face. At last her survival instinct kicked in and she took a step back. "I'm sorry," she stammered, "you probably don't need more interruptions while you're browsing, I'll leave you to it."

Ducking her head she turned and walked away. I took a deep breath, taking as much of her scent in to me as I could before she was gone. She reached the end of the aisle and shot me a curious look over her shoulder, blushing and looking away when she saw that my gaze had followed her. I closed my eyes and consciously unclenched my first, raking my hand through my hair in a bid to relax.

That could have gone better. It could also have gone a lot worse.

I glanced down at the book I was still clutching and realised that I had left permanent finger indentations on it. With a sigh of resignation I turned to head towards the checkout; it wouldn't do to leave the book behind for someone to puzzle over. Alice and Jasper were going to see me at the library sooner than they thought.

* * * * *

They were sitting at a remote study table, books and laptops artfully arranged to give the impression of academic industry. I noticed however, that Alice's hair was a little more mussed than it had been this morning, and Jasper wore a preoccupied expression.

"Studying hard?" I said as I pulled out a chair and sat down.

"Something like that," Alice allowed with a demure smile, "we had to do some research."

"Oh really?"

"Mm-hmm, up in the stacks," Alice nodded in the direction of the archival area of the library located on the mezzanine floor upstairs.

I raised an eyebrow at this and considered Jasper's expression. Had he been capable, I could swear he would have been blushing.

"How did it go?" he asked, gamely changing the subject.

I shrugged and glanced at Alice.

"Not bad," Alice supplied. She reached across the table to squeeze my wrist in a show of excitement, "Can I talk to her now?"

"It's early days," I cautioned, and then stopped. "What the hell am I saying? No, you can't."

"Why not?" Alice's brow creased as she stared at me, "you won't do anything wrong."

Jasper was frowning slightly as well now, no doubt picking up on my inner conflict. I desired Bella more than I had ever desired any human – and there had been a few – and yet I wanted to protect her and see her safe, even at the cost of protecting her from myself.

"I'm a vampire, she's a human. You know it can't end well, you know the deal. We have a tendency to bite."

"Some women like it," Jasper mused with a reminiscent smile as he took Alice's hands and gazed up at the library stacks.

I stared at him.

"Just sayin'," he shrugged.

Alice giggled.

I slouched in my chair as I grinned and shook my head at them. "No need to elaborate."

"Bet you're glad I can block you now, huh?" Alice taunted.

"You have no idea," I replied. Shielding myself from the thoughts of others was no easy task, and one that I wasn't able to do for very long at all. By a very prolonged process of trial and error, Alice and I had managed to form a tentative shield between us. A shield alas, that Emmett had no interest in acquiring. Emmett was the youngest of our family ad delighted in his existence, particularly the time he spent with his mate, Rosalie. I would never deny them the joy of each other simply because I couldn't help but read their thoughts, but a shield, _any_ type of shield, would be a welcome relief from some of their more, shall we say, enthusiastic encounters.

I looked at my watch and slumped further still in my chair, looking up as Alice gave a gurgle of laughter.

"Oh, Edward," she shook her head at me, "look at you. Over a hundred years old and yet you play the sulky teenager to perfection."

"We're 22 years old this time around, Babe, remember?" Jasper nudged her without looking up from his laptop.

"Of course I do," Alice said lightly, "but look at our boy." She put her chin in her hands and regarded me with a fond smile. "He's growing up and falling in love."

"I don't remember using that word," I replied in what I hoped was a mild tone.

"You didn't," Alice said, "but I just did." She tapped her temple with one finger and winked at me with a knowing smile. "Any questions?"

"I'll pass."

Alice pouted.

"For now," I added, and watched her smile.

We had sat in the library for the next couple of hours making idle chit cat and playing on our computers. Jasper had suggested leaving campus at one point and going for a run, and while I had explored the option I realised that I couldn't find it in me to leave.

"I just don't feel like going too far today," I explained, feeling foolish.

"He doesn't want to leave Bella," Alice translated.

Jasper gave me a considering look and then nodded.

And so we had stayed.

* * * * *

At last I entered the lecture hall and padded up the stairs towards the seats in the back row, taking my usual spot against the wall. I was the first to arrive, having all but bolted from the library when it was time to leave, Alice and Jasper smiling at my eagerness. I sat for what felt like an eternity as other students began to arrive. The noise level in the hall increased exponentially as more students filtered in, laughing and talking amongst themselves. I kept my gaze on the door ignoring any arrival that wasn't Bella. A few times I had straightened a little in my seat as I had caught her scent, only to be disappointed when the doors opened and it wasn't her. Where was she? The lecture hall was one of the smaller ones, and it was nearly filled to capacity. Was she going to be kept up at work? Surely not, Alice would have told me otherwise.

The lecturer arrived and began to set up his laptop, plugging it in to the overhead projector and audio system. The students' chatter began to die down as they realised the lecture was soon to start, and so the lecture hall was quiet enough for the door bursting open to sound like a gunshot. My mouth filled with venom out of pure instinct. It was Bella hesitating in the doorway, her cheeks flushed as she realised her entrance had inadvertently drawn everyone's attention. Ducking her head, she made her way up the aisle, her eyes flicking back and forth as she looked for a vacant seat. There were a few available here and there, but I could see her cringing away from the hopeful leers. Setting her shoulders, she marched further up the stairs, walking towards – I realised with a shock – me.

I sat motionless, as she seemed to make a beeline for where I was sitting, only to watch with a surge of relief–and disappointment–as she sank into a seat a row in front of me. She dropped her bag at her feet without ceremony and hauled out her notebook, leaning towards the girl sitting beside her in response to a whispered question. I watched Bella's profile as she whispered a reply and her face lit up with suppressed laughter. I considered the blonde she was talking to, and found her thoughts were all too human. She was smiling at Bella, nodding and talking while her thoughts were altogether different.

_What's all the fuss about? She's not even all that pretty. The way Mike carries on you'd think she was model material. At least Tyler isn't interested._

Jessica leaned against the man sitting on her right, whom I assumed was the Tyler. She may have felt secure about him, but Tyler's thoughts were wrapped around Bella. His mind flickered with fantasies that seemed well established with images of Bella writhing and moaning his name. I didn't like that. I took an immediate dislike to the man, the way he cheapened her; turning Bella into his plaything while she smiled and spoke to him.

_Mine._

I growled, softly enough that the sound didn't register, but it was enough for Tyler to shiver suddenly and pull his attention back to the present as the lecturer dimmed the lights and the session began.

The projector screen illuminated, and there was a muted cheer as the guitar chords blasted out of the speakers. I shook my head. Of all the things to play, the lecturer had chosen to start the session with an episode of _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_. I could only smile at the irony.

"This episode's a good one, I've got the whole series on DVD," Jessica told Bella in an excited whisper.

I smiled, _of course she did_, and watched as Tyler leaned over and gently bit Jessica's neck, making her cringe in delight. Perhaps Jasper had a point after all.

* * * * *

As the lecture ended I was still shaking my head in quiet amusement at the overdone vampire myth. The lecturer had focussed on the uncharacteristically strong female protagonist in the series that had bucked the Hollywood trends when the series first went to air. He had raised some good points, although I was more interested in the other trends that still seemed to hold true as far as the humans were concerned. They still believed that vampires had no reflection, that they had an aversion to holy objects and would burst into flames in direct sunlight. I wondered then, what they would make of Rosalie's predilection for her own stunning reflection, or the ancient crucifix that Carlisle treasured. The historical stereotypes were amusing, but they at least served to offer another thin layer of protection.

"So what are you up to this weekend, Bella?"

My attention was pulled back to the row in front of me. Jessica was asking, although Tyler was listening with more attention than I liked to see. Bella seemed oblivious as she put her notebook away.

"Angela wants me to go out for some drinks tonight with her boyfriend and some of his buddies," she said carelessly.

"Ohh, which bar?" Jessica asked.

"Who's the guy?" Tyler asked in the same breath.

Bella sat up, pulling her bag up onto her lap. "Ben Cheney," she answered.

Tyler's expression cleared. "I know Ben, he's a good guy."

"Good to know," Bella nodded.

I watched Tyler's mind as Ben's face appeared, followed by a series of others. It was as if he was sifting through a mental catalogue, trying to see which of them might pose some sort of competition.

"Which bar are you going to?" he asked, looking at Jessica, "we don't have any plans do we?"

"I guess not," Jessica replied with a pout. She had plans that involved some lingerie and a set-up scene that had no doubt stemmed from a steady diet of too many romance novels. She brightened at the prospect of cheap champagne. "It sounds like fun, what time?"

"Half seven I think, they're going to be at O'Grady's," Bella said, and I offered silent thanks for the information. "See you there?"

"Sure," Jessica smiled as she seethed with indignation. _Tyler knows I wanted a romantic night for the two of us. He's going to be in so much trouble._

"Wouldn't miss it," Tyler waved.

Bella moved off with the other students, Jessica and Tyler slowly bringing up the rear. I remained in my seat for a moment waiting for the burn in my throat to subside before giving it up as a lost cause. As long as I was around Bella's scent, it was going to be a problem. I sighed and followed.

* * * * *

Alice and Jasper were waiting by the car as I approached.

"So," Alice said in a singsong tone, "how was it?"

"Fine," I said, digging out my keys and stopping when Jasper cleared his throat. He raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged and tossed the keys to him.

"Edward," Alice was shocked, "seriously?"

"Why not," I shrugged, "nothing seems to be as expected these days."

"Well, yeah," Alice said, "but this is-," she paused to give the moment dramatic weight, "_your car_."

I opened the rear passenger door. "It's just a Volvo, Alice, and even I can take a break now and then."

"And they say the Age of Miracles has passed," Jasper said as he gave me a droll smile and started the engine.

Leaning back against the seat, I gazed out the window as Jasper drove out of the car park. _To your left, Edward_, Alice instructed. Looking over I saw Bella strolling along path that led off campus. I frowned, realising I hadn't seen her truck today. Was she having trouble with it? Perhaps I could get Rosalie to have a look at it during the evening this week.

"Or maybe she just decided to walk today," Alice chimed in.

"It's not very safe," I replied.

"Or very common," Jasper added. "What is it with people not wanting to walk anywhere these days?"

"C'mon," Alice chided him in a teasing tone, "you _still_ talk about how much you loved that horse of yours when you were enlisted. That wasn't walking either."

"Maybe not," Jasper agreed, "but it was still more exercise than sitting in these things," he changed gears with a slight expression of distaste. For all that Jasper had changed the technological changes over the last two centuries, he was still a purist at heart. The posted speed limit in the car park was _slow_, but Jasper slowed down even more as we drove past Bella who was walking at a brisk pace. She had a slight smile on her face, her lips moving silently as she mouthed the lyrics of the song she was listening to through her ipod ear-buds.

"She's nice," Alice said, twisting in her seat so that she could keep watching Bella as we drove past, tactfully not pointing out that I was doing the same. She had a wistful tone in her voice, as if she was missing someone she didn't even know yet. "Get a move on, Edward."

Jasper smiled and kept driving.

* * * * *

Esme was waiting for me when we got home.

"Edward," she was smiling as she reached out to take my hand, "how did it go?"

I allowed myself to be led towards the sofa in the living room and sat down beside her. "Is there anyone in this house that doesn't know?" I said with a resigned smile, looking up as Alice gave a gurgle of laughter on her way upstairs.

"We're a small family that never sleeps," Alice called out, "you're the latest diversion, Edward."

"Don't listen to her," Esme advised, "you do what you feel is right."

"You make it sound so easy," I said hearing the doleful tone in my voice.

She reached up to stroke my hair. _It's going to be fine, Edward. Things will work out for the best. You deserve happiness, but love isn't always convenient._

I gave a short laugh at that.

_Out of all of us, you are the best equipped to deal with this situation._

Esme was overjoyed that my heart had finally been touched by love, no matter how potential there was for tragedy. After all these decades of thinking that I would always be alone …

_Of course she'll love you back. If she's as bright as Alice says she is, she'll see you for the catch you are._ She gave me a fond smile.

"Stop it, Mom," I teased, "are you trying to make me blush?"

Esme pulled me towards her for a hug as she laughed and dropped a kiss on my temple, and laughed louder again when Emmett appeared behind me and flicked my ear.

"I hear you've got a hot date tonight, Bro. You gonna eat before you head out?"

"That's the plan," I answered. "You want?"

Emmett gave laughed as he pretended to look hurt. "Have you ever known me not to be hungry?"

I grinned and gave Esme a quick kiss on her cheek as I stood. "Let's go."

* * * * *

"So you're really going to do it," Emmett said, dropping the mountain lion carcass at his feet, "you're going to watch the human again tonight."

"She has a name," I relied, flicking some blood off my lip with my thumb and then licking it clean. We had hunted well. I felt sated now, although I knew there was only one taste that would truly satisfy. I taste I was determined to deny myself.

"Bella," Emmett agreed. "Think you resist her? From what you've told us I don't see how you can do it."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," I replied, shooting him a look of amused exasperation.

"Aw hell, you know that's not what I meant," Emmett protested. It was true. There was nothing in Emmett's mind that he wouldn't speak out loud. It was a boon of sorts, as I never felt like I was intruding on his privacy on my occasional inadvertent slips. "If there's anyone that can handle that kind of temptation it's you." He shook his head. "Man, you spent six months with the Denali clan and lived to tell the tale, so if you can resist those women than I-,"

"Who said anything about resisting them?" I interrupted.

Emmett looked at me and then gave a low whistle. "That must've been quite a time you had there, Bro."

"It had its moments," I allowed, "but compared to Bella, it was nothing."

Emmett gaped at me this time. "Damn," he said at last, "you've got a bigger pair than I thought."

"Thanks, Emmet," I winced, "that's really … gross."

"Hey," he spread his hands in a defensive gesture, "Just tryin' to give a guy a compliment." He looked around the clearing. "Where's Jasper? I thought he was going to join us?"

"He's, uh," I cleared my throat, "spending some time with Alice." I gave Emmett a meaningful look.

He laughed. "Those two have going for a lot of private time lately," he raised an eyebrow at me, "is that anything to do with you?"

I scuffed at the deer carcass at my feet, looking up as Emmett gave a low rumble of laughter.

"You must be putting out some serious vibes for him to let off the tension like that," he said. "Guess it saves him projecting onto the rest of us," he went on, "not that Rose and I need any help in that department." His thoughts took on a distinct honey flavour as he smiled, making me groan.

This evening couldn't come fast enough.

* * * * *

_A vampire walks into a bar ..._

I grimaced at the cheesiness of the line, but nonetheless I walked inside and regretted it a moment later. This must be what purgatory was like: to be surrounded by so many people, all hoping to talk loud enough to drown out their insecurities. Unfortunately for me I heard everything said and unsaid.

Emmett and I had returned to the house, and in a bid to block everyone else's excitement and secondhand lust I had all but locked myself away with the piano. I had worked through my favourites before moving onto a new composition that had been tickling my mind for the last week. It was a delicate melody that I couldn't quite capture, but I was not about to give up. Finally, Alice had appeared in the doorway with a knowing smile.

_It's time_ she had announced before turning to go back to Jasper.

I took advantage of a gap in the crowd which parted further to let me through to the bar, and I ordered a drink to blend in. Glass in hand, I turned and rested my elbows on the bar, surveying the room. Bella's hair gleamed like a torch in the crowd as she moved from person to person, laughing and talking as she tried to make her way to the bar. She had nearly reached it when a light shove from behind as someone made their way past her towards the bar sent her stumbling against me. I had my arm around her waist to steady her before she even had a chance to realise she was falling.

"Thanks," she put a hand on my chest to push herself upright and it was with some effort of will that I allowed her to move away. She got her balance and blinked at me slowly. It was then I noticed she was swaying slightly. I took a step closer, pretending it was because of the loud music and dim lighting in the club. Her eyes were dilated, and her cheeks and lips were flushed with the blood that was racing through the engorged veins, making her look and smell more delectable than ever.

I clutched at my drink and shoved my other hand into my jeans pocket in a bid not to touch her again.

"How much have you had to drink?"

"A couple," she admitted, giving me a lazy smile, "why's that, are you trying to work out when I'll be a sure thing?"

"Not at all," I said in what I hoped was a neutral tone, "but you need to make sure you get home safe."

"I'll be fine," she said with a dismissive wave, "I live within walking distance."

"I'm not sure that's the best-," I began, surprised at the level of concern I felt for her. At how much I wanted her for myself.

"Plus my friends will look out for me," she went on, waving over my shoulder. I turned to see a small group of students occupying a booth, waving back. Their thoughts seemed friendly enough, which was more than could be said for some of the other men in the bar that were eyeing her with speculation. She turned back and cocked her head to one side as she considered me. "Do I know you?"

"Not really," I allowed after a brief pause, "but I've seen you at a couple of lectures."

"Got it," she snapped her fingers, having missed what I'd just said, "the bookshop, I saw you there this morning."

"That's right," I said, trying to sound surprised.

"I've got a good memory for faces," she admitted, "but names get the better of me." She extended a hand expecting me to shake it, "I'm Bella."

Now I was thankful I had a cold drink in my hand. I transferred it to my left, and shook her hand with my right, "Edward."

"Brrrrr," she laughed and gave an exaggerated shiver. I was holding my drink in my right hand again, and now I smiled and raised my glass in silent explanation. She laughed. "Oh well, you know what they say, cold hands, warm heart."

Dead heart in my case.

"Can I get you a drink?" I gestured towards the bar, watching her as she hesitated before giving me a slow smile. She opened her mouth to reply, and then turned as her name was yelled from the back of the bar. Jessica was waving her arms, animosity forgotten as she pointed at a jug of margarita on the table.

"I guess that's me taken care of," Bella turned back to me with a smile, "but thanks, Edward. Maybe I'll see you around sometime."

"Maybe," I nodded knowing full well it would be a certainty.

* * * * *

I had nursed that drink for an hour before the bar had become too much for me to bear. I'd made my way outside and had gone to the rear of the building so that I would scale it without being seen. Standing on the rooftop provided me the perfect vantage point to watch all the comings and goings and provided the illusion of distance from the thoughts below me, which were growing progressively inebriated.

At last the doors opened and the a group of people staggered out, clutching at each other in a combination of laughter and the genuine need for support. Jessica had draped herself around Tyler, her romantic thoughts forgotten as her more base instinct took over. Thoughts of cheap lace were forgotten and now she wanted to stake her claim. Angela was, I was relieved to see one of the most sober of the group, as was Ben. They were standing off to one side of the group, arms around each other as they made quiet plans for what remained of the evening. Bella broke way from the group and strolled towards them. I watched Angela's mind as Bella gave her an expansive smile.

"Great night guys, thanks for the invite," she was saying.

"See? I told you that you'd have a great time," Angela replied. _Ben was right. Eric's definitely interested in her. We'll have a talk tomorrow._

I shifted my attention to Ben. He was watching Angela and Bella talk with a fond smile on his face. His thoughts towards Bella were kind, but not in any way covetous. He was amused with his friend Eric and I had a sudden vision of a man watching Bella with keen interest. A bray of laughter from the group caught his attention, and I saw his disapproval of Tyler, especially the way he had been watching Bella all evening even though he was paired with Jessica. He tolerated Tyler but didn't think he was worthy of Angela's friendship. I felt very well disposed towards Ben in that moment.

Plans were being made for the group to party on, and I caught Ben's mental wince as his nearby apartment was suggested as the venue. He had the place to himself this weekend, and he had already made plans with Angela for a quiet coffee after the bar. He had no ulterior motives other than spending some quiet time with her, and my respect for him went up another notch.

"How about you, Bella?"

I glanced down at the group to see someone approaching her. It was Eric. I watched as he offered Bella a hopeful smile as she hesitated, and in that hesitation I saw her future more clearly than Alice had.

She might say yes, she might not, but either way someday soon she would say yes to someone. That simple word would spark a chain of events: tentative dates, the first kiss, love, perhaps even marriage. I imagined her dressed in white, her face glowing with happiness as she offered herself up to someone before a circlet of gold was slipped onto her left hand. Someone human.

The pain was unlike anything I'd ever felt before. A human would have to be at the point of death to feel anything remotely like it. This was more than pain. It was rage. I clenched my hands on the brick balustrade wall that circled the roof of the building, not noticing as the bricks crumbled to dust. The very idea that some undeserving _boy_ would be the one to claim her as his own was unthinkable. I didn't understand this emotion at all. It was all a confusing tangle of rage and despair. It was like nothing I had ever experienced, I couldn't put a name to it.

"Hey, Eric," Tyler called out, "you guys coming?"

Tyler had been watching the exchange and was annoyed that Eric had been the one to approach Bella and not himself. The envy in his thoughts suddenly put a name to how I was feeling.

"I'm going to call it a night," Bella said in a gentle, almost apologetic tone.

"You're sure?" Eric couldn't hide his disappointment.

"Yeah, I've had a really busy day, I'm beat," Bella explained with a smile. Angela nodded in understanding, but Eric wavered.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said at last, "can I see you home?"

"That's really sweet of you, Eric, but I'll be fine," Bella explained. "It sounds like the guys have made plans though, so you have a great time. It was nice meeting you."

Eric shuffled clearly not wanting to leave just yet, but he gave in to the group heckles as they began to head off to continue their evening. As they began to depart Bella turned to Angela and Ben with a small sigh of relief.

"You didn't like him?" Angela asked.

"He's a really nice guy," Bella replied, "but seriously guys, I just want to get home and go to bed."

"Are you okay to get home?" Ben asked. It was just the three of them standing outside the bar, and it was late. "Can I get you a cab?"

"I'll be fine," Bella laughed, "I haven't got far to go. Now you two-," she made a shooing gesture "scoot, have fun."

"Bella," Angela clearly wasn't happy with the situation, and Ben shared her concern.

"Angela," Bella mimicked her tone, "I'll send you a text when I get home safe and sound. _Go_."

When Angela and Ben still hesitated, Bella sighed. "Guys, you know how stubborn I can be, now go, or I'll get angry, and I'm good at it, so you'd be upset for the rest of the night."

This made Angela laugh and hold her hands up in surrender. "Okay, be like that then. I'll see you later."

"Right," Bella nodded, "have fun." She gave them a cocky salute and turned to begin her walk home. After a moment's pause, Angela and Ben set off in the opposite direction.

Up on the rooftop, I started to feel anxious. This wasn't something I had considered, Bella walking alone at night. It was dangerous, didn't she realise what sort of people were out there? The streets were unsafe enough without the likes of me to compound the situation. I watched as she paused at the intersection before crossing with the lights. On the other side of the roof I checked the dark alley below before dropping over the side of the building and landing in a crouch with barely a sound. As I stood up I scanned the vicinity, flicking through one mind after another.

_I'm going to throw up …_

_Please don't card me, please don't card me …_

_Have I got condoms at home?_

I followed her keeping a wide distance so that she wouldn't know I was there. Just like all the other times. She had covered two blocks now, another five or ten minutes' walk at her pace and she'd be home. Perhaps this was unnecessary. Stupid vampire stalker. I felt foolish but the compulsion to make sure she was safe was overwhelming.

_Here she comes, beautiful … _

There. I saw her face, but any pleasure was gone in a fraction of a second, as I scanned the mind of the man who was gloating over her. He was a total stranger, but his mind was not unfamiliar to me. I had hunted others like him over the years. I snarled, the sound ripping the burn in my throat, flaring the heat.

Meanwhile Bella walked on. It was late and the streetlights were on but she was deep in shadow as she walked under shop awnings. The man was pleased with this, as the shadows would assist him. He followed at a cautious distance, his soft-soled shoes making no sound as he mapped out his plan of attack. Already he was imagining the look of terror on her face, just like the others. Bella wouldn't be his first. He wanted to chase her down. He liked the thrill of hunt. This time would be different; I wondered what he would think of _my_ style of hunting.

There was a gap between the buildings up ahead which would mean another dark alley. Perfect. He was getting closer now, but so was I. He began to pick up his pace.

_Nearly there_.

Bella drew level with the alley.

He began to reach out, but I got there first.

It only took me a second to clamp my hand over his mouth and step into the shadows, pushing him into the wall to subdue any movement. Bella's footsteps faltered as she sensed movement behind her, but by the time she had turned around there was nothing to see. The man's body broke out in a sweat as he struggled for air. I had my hand clamped over his nose and mouth so that not even a whisper of sound would emerge. I scanned the area. The thoughts I could pick up seemed innocuous enough. I would have time to deal with him before seeing to Bella, and I relaxed my grip enough for him to suck in a hasty gulp of air.

_What the hell?_

His mind was racing with a combination of fury and terror. The hunter had become the hunted, only he hadn't realised that yet. Right now, he saw me as the man who had killed his buzz. I could do much, much worse.

"I know about you," I said in a furious whisper. My breath hit him in the face and his body responded to the pheromones automatically, even as his survival instinct was no doubt shrieking at him to run. "I know all about you, Lonnie. I know about the others too."

His struggles stopped as he stared at me in sudden confusion.

_Impossible, there's no way he could …_

"I know about Stacey, and Karen," I went on, plucking the names from his mind, names he had found in the purses he had kept, "and Stephanie, and Michelle-," I paused and looked deeply into his eyes. "Shall I continue?"

He shook his head. I could hear his heartbeat hammering in his chest like a bird frantically beating its wings against the bars of a cage. He returned my gaze and saw the hunger raging just beneath the surface, and at last he began to understand the danger he was in. He stood silent, still pinned by my hands as the occasional tremor wracked his body.

"You knew exactly what you were doing every single time," I said, "you need to seek out the police and hand yourself in."

I shifted my grip, restraining him with one hand in the centre of his chest as I reached out and casually rested my other hand on the brick wall beside his head. I curled my fingers a little, and he turned to look, and his eyes widened as he saw the brickwork crumbling beneath my fingers as if it was dust. I caught his gaze again.

"The slightest pressure and my hand will go straight through your chest," I rumbled, "so here's what you're going to do."

_Agree to anything. Say anything. Just say yes and then maybe he'll … _

"You don't know what I'll do," I interrupted his thought, and his eyes widened. "But I'm going to give you a choice." I paused to make sure he understood. "You can hand yourself in to the police, or," I gave him a slow grin and then darted in to snap my teeth at the air beside his throat, "we can take care of this situation right here."

He whimpered, and there was the sudden acrid stench of urine. His breath was coming in quick gasps as he tried to form words.

"P-p-," he stuttered in his terror.

"Police," I said. "You've made the right decision." I removed my hand and took a pace backwards, watching as he crumpled to the ground on all fours, snivelling and grovelling before me in his own filth. "I'll be watching you, Lonnie, and if you disappoint me I'll find you."

By the time he dared to look up, I was gone.

I ran out of the alley and followed the trail of Bella's scent. She hadn't gone far. Dealing with that scum had taken a couple of minutes at best, but my mind had never stopped scanning the area. There didn't seem to be any other obvious threats, and I wanted Lonnie removed for everyone's safety. For an instant I felt regret for the situation. Regret that I hadn't dealt with the matter in a more final, far more satisfying way. A quick shake to sever his spine and the problem would have been solved. Decades before I would have sunk my teeth into his neck and had my fill of him. Neither option were a consideration for me now. Carlisle had more faith in me than I perhaps deserved, and although I questioned that faith, I did not want to let him down.

I could see Bella up ahead. Relief, so exquisite that it was nearly pain, washed through me at the sight of her. I slowed my pace and followed her all the way home.

**A/N: See? I told you the chapters would get longer. All I had to do was leave down and drive for 3.5 hours each way with Vampward talking to me all the way.**

**Hope you like the story so far, reviews = love …**


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight._

**Ch6**

I stood concealed in shadow as I watched her enter the building. She was home safe and sound with no idea how close to danger she had been on her quiet walk home. I took a deep breath to taste the evening air, catching a faint trace of Bella as the wind carried her scent to me. I could still taste _him_, the insect who had thought he could violate her body and discard her when he was done. A growl rumbled in my chest, the monster stirring as the rage began to increase. I had to get out of here. I had to feed again. I would come back when she was asleep.

Returning to the car, I sped out of town and made my way to the forest. There, I fed with reckless and voracious hunger; dropping the bodies to the ground before lunging for one, then another, and yet another. I had to satisfy my bloodlust before I could trust myself to be anywhere near Bella tonight. No doubt Alice will have seen what had happened, and I would have to give an account of the evening's activities to Carlisle. At last, the anger at what might have been began to subside, and I stood with animal carcasses strewn around me. Sighing, I investigated the area until I found a suitable area and began to dig a hole to conceal the remnants of my meal. I could leave some of the bodies exposed for other forest predators, but to leave them all would look unnatural. By the time I had finished cleaning up after myself I was filthy. I snorted in disgust. I was going to have to go home and change. Looking up at the night sky I ran some swift calculations. There was still plenty of time before dawn to see her.

The house was empty when I returned, which was fine by me. There was a note stuck to the newel post on the stairs.

_Football at the usual place – see you there?_

I found a pen and scrawled a quick reply for them to find when they got home, even though I knew Alice would tell them as soon as she saw what I had decided to do. In any case, it made for two even teams without me. I knew I was distancing myself from them, but the attraction Bella held for me could not, and would not be denied. As long as it was in my power to keep her safe, I would watch over her.

* * * * *

The window slid open and her scent billowed over me making me pause to savour it. There were subtle differences that I could detect this time; her scent was overlayed with tones of bourbon, and its woody musk added a deeper layer to her usual sweetness, another level of complexity. I smiled at my choice of words. The situation was becoming more complex by the day.

It looked like she hadn't been sleeping well; the sheets and quilt had been kicked off. The clothes she slept in were soft cotton, and my eyes were drawn to the sliver of midriff exposed where her sleep pants rode low on her hips, and then the swell of her breast. I took a step closer, hypnotised by the sight of her chest rising and falling with each breath. She looked so warm, so vital. I drank in the sight and scent of her, swallowing down the venom as it surged in my mouth. Her heartbeat filled the room, soothing me. I took another step closer. I could almost reach out and touch her now.

And then she lifted her head from the pillow and stared at me.

Her heartbeat echoed in the room, its steady drumming did not falter. She gave me a heavy-lidded smile before nestling her head back onto her pillow. A long sigh and then she sank deeper into sleep. She had smiled as if she recognised me but it was impossible to tell. I stood motionless, unsure of what had just happened. I watched her until the sky began to show the first blush of dawn, and then returned home.

* * * * *

I let myself into the house, nodding at Jasper who looked up from watching the sports channel with a casual wave.

"Carlisle?" I asked.

_Upstairs, Edward_, came his response.

Alice was sitting beside Jasper flicking through a copy of Vogue. I don't know why she bothered, given she could anticipate the trends anytime she chose. She maintained she drew a certain amount of pleasure from reading the articles. As far as I was concerned they were always the same breathless descriptions of what amounted to be little more than scraps of fabric which became less and less with every passing year.

"Thanks for returning my call," Alice murmured as she turned another page.

I patted my pocket and took out my cell phone. Sure enough there were two missed calls from her. "Sorry, I was distracted."

"So I saw," she replied with a knowing smile. "Don't underestimate her, Edward."

I hesitated. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

Her smile broadened. "Not yet."

Jasper snorted, his gaze not moving from the television. Sighing at Alice's provocative comment, I made my way up to Carlisle's room. He was sitting at his desk with an open book before him but his gaze trained on the door waiting for my arrival. His warm smile of welcome dimmed as he took in the expression on my face.

"Edward," he said standing up, "What happened, are you-."

"I need to talk to you," I said without preamble as I stepped into his room and took a seat, resting my elbows on the desk. "Has Alice told you anything?"

Carlisle hesitated and sank back down into his chair. "Very little, only that you wanted to see me when you got home."

I offered silent thanks for Alice's discretion.

"What happened?" he asked, his golden gaze was steady and filled with compassion.

"It was bad, Carlisle."

His face would have paled if that were possible. _Edward, you didn't-_

"No, it's not that."

He took a deep breath. _Of course not, I'm sorry I entertained the notion. I should have known from your eyes. _He looked at my still-golden eyes with relief and something else - was it pride?

_Almost happened_, Carlisle amended. " I can see that you stayed in control."

"I don't know how," I confessed. "I didn't fall off the wagon, Carlisle, but it wasn't easy." The sewer of Lonnie's mind was still fresh in my head, and I growled before I could stop myself. I had killed many such as him before; appointing myself judge, jury and executioner as a way to justify my thirst.

Carlisle got up and walked around to desk to put a hand on my shoulder and the growl rumbled away into silence. I took a deep breath and then nodded once to let him know I was okay. _You stayed true, Son._ Our eyes met, and I nodded once in gratitude.

"I'm not looking for compliments, Carlisle."

"I know, but I can't help my thoughts now, can I?" he smiled as he took his seat again. _I'm impressed, Edward_, _you've shown_ s_o much control. _"I think you'd better tell me everything."

And so we talked. When I told him about Lonnie, Carlisle looked concerned.

"How much does he know?"

"Nothing that anyone will believe," I shrugged, and thought about the situation some more. "From what I saw in his mind-," I broke off and had to suck in a deep breath as the anger surged again, "he has more to lose in this situation than we do." I raised my eyes to Carlisle's steady gaze. "Carlisle, he's killed before. So _many_. Those other women – someone might have felt about them the way I feel about Bella. Might suffer what I would've suffered if she'd been harmed. It's not right-," I stopped and looked down at my clenched hands. The idea of Bella gone from the world; I could not, would not consider it.

The warmth of Carlisle's smile was a surprise. _She's very good for you. I'm impressed._

"And if you had taken his life you might have spared another, but at what cost?" Carlisle reasoned. "You did the right thing, Edward."

I grunted and shook my head. Leaving that piece of scum alive in the alley had gone against every instinct I had.

"Emmett can watch him," Carlisle suggested. We both considered this and exchanged a small smile. "I know," Carlisle went on, "he'll love it." We gazed at each other for a long moment. "So what now?" he asked.

"I don't know," I replied. The discussion had left me feeling incredibly weary and longing for sleep, although that was a retreat that was lost to me forever. I wanted to see Bella again, to reassure myself that she was safe. "Maybe I should leave, move somewhere else."

"There must be another way," Carlisle remonstrated. 

"I don't see how," I sighed.

"Stranger things have happened," he replied. "We're living proof of that." _You're stronger than you think, Son. Don't deny yourself happiness. _"At least stay for your family, if not for Bella."

I flinched from his words. I had left the family once and was not proud of the intervening years before I found my way back home. Carlisle and Esme had welcomed me back with open arms, no questions asked. Could I become a nomad again? I could deliver myself from temptation and then Bella would be safe, but I also knew that removing one threat from her life would not remove all of them. She would be alone, defenceless.

"I'll stay," I said at last and watched Carlisle smile.

* * * * *

Over the next two weeks, life fell into a kind of routine. I attended my college classes, I wrote and submitted papers, I spent time on campus with Alice and Jasper, and worked to fit into the background as much as possible. And I watched Bella. The compulsion to feed had been replaced by the compulsion to keep her safe, two obsessions in an uneasy alliance.

I watched her arrive on campus every morning. I shadowed her as she walked to class. I studied her in the lecture hall we shared once a week. At the end of every day I followed her home, and then sat in her bedroom as she slept, listening to her mumbled words, snatching at the scant offerings from her unconscious mind. And all the while I told myself it was because I wanted to keep her safe, but it was a lie. I wasn't trying to keep her safe. I was trying to keep her in any way I could. She never saw me, but every day I basked in the warmth of her smile. I was so tired of being cold.

Bella was having another restless night. As I sat down in what I had come to think of as _my_ chair I could see her eyelids flickering in REM sleep. She frowned once before rolling over onto her other side. One of her pillows had been pushed off the bed, and she clutched at the sheet. Her lips trembled. This was the part of the evening that I always looked forward to.

"Wait," she mumbled. "Wait."

I leaned forward, fascinated.

"Who-," she mumbled and shifted again, kicking against the constriction of the sheets against her feet. She was having a restless dream tonight. She had kicked one of her pillows off the bed, and I could see it was the one she usually held to her chest. I stood up and moved to pick it up. It was at that moment she opened her eyes and looked straight at me with a soft gasp.

By the time she had fumbled for her bedside light I had gone.

* * * * *

The next morning saw me sitting in my car drumming my fingers on the steering wheel with impatience as I waited for Bella truck to pull into the car park.

"Stop worrying, Edward," Alice said with a sigh, "it's going to be fine."

"So remind me again why we're just sitting here?" Jasper drawled from the back seat.

"Edward wants to see Bella," Alice replied, "you know, the girl he's been spending every night with."

"It's not like that," I griped.

"How else would you describe it?" Alice said giving me an arch look.

"I-," I broke off, distracted as I heard the distinct rumble of Bella's truck. She looked tiny sitting behind the steering wheel of the faded rusty behemoth, and I saw her flinch as the engine backfired as it rumbled to a stop. Something was going to have to be done about that, I'd talk to Rosalie and see if she would cooperate.

"That's going to take some sweet talking," Alice observed and then cocked her head before nodding once, "but she'll come round."

"I love the way you do that," Jasper said, fascinated. Alice twisted in her seat to give him an impish grin before she then popped the lock on her door and climbed out. Jasper and I followed suit.

Bella made her way across the car park, settling the strap of her bulky satchel on her shoulder after some initial struggle. The seasons were changing and although the sky was clear the air was crisp and cool. Today she was wearing a padded overcoat and a pair of mittens that seemed to hamper her movements somewhat. I could hear her cursing under her breath as she lost her patience and yanked them off to stuff them into her coat pocket.

Waving off Jasper and Alice, I followed at what I hoped was a discrete distance and watched as Bella entered one of the cafes on campus and ordered two coffees and a breakfast muffin. She found a table and had just made herself comfortable when Angela arrived, pink cheeked and out of breath. I slipped into the cafe and located a seat on the far wall, partially hidden by a group of students sitting at another table. There was a dirty cup on the table, and I pulled it closer to my elbow and took out one of my textbooks to have open on the table. Anyone glancing across would see a student at study.

"I can't believe I over-slept like that," Angela said as she dropped into her seat and accepted the coffee from Bella with a smile of thanks. "You're a lifesaver."

"No charge," Bella said as she struggled out of her heavy coat and slung it over the back of one of the chairs at the table before sipping at her drink, "you've done the same for me after all, and anyway," she went on with a slight smile, "what with all those late nights you've been having you must've needed the sleep."

"Bella," Angela tried to protest, but the colour in her cheeks increased and she was unable to hold back a smile.

"Mm-hmm," Bella tipped her cup towards Angela to indicate the blush, "It's just as I thought."

"You don't have to think _that,_" Angela said, sipping primly at her coffee, "we just talk."

"I know, Ange," Bella said, reaching over to rub her hand, "you haven't had any sleepovers yet, I think it's good that you're both taking it slow." Bella sat back in her chair and cradled her cup in both hands. "I like seeing you happy."

Angela's expression became dreamy. Even I didn't have to be a mind reader to know who she was thinking about. "Oh, Bella," she said, "Ben's just so _nice_." Bella giggled into her cup and I smiled. Angela's thoughts of Ben were suitably glowing, and I was pleased to see he had conducted himself well. My good opinion of him still stood.

"And," Angela gave Bella a pointed look, "so are some of his friends." _Eric really likes her._

Any humour I had found in their conversation promptly vanished.

"Is there any way I can get out of this conversation gracefully?" Bella asked, picking at her muffin and popping a piece of it into her mouth.

"Probably not," Angela replied, "but I'm prepared to be lenient seeing as you bought the coffee this morning."

Bella nodded, her mouth was full. I watched her face carefully, watching the different expressions flicker across it while she obviously tried to formulate a response. I felt the familiar surge of frustration and fascination that I was denied access; years of longing for silence had found my prayers answered in a most annoying fashion. Now I found myself longing for her internal voice most of all.

"I'm sure Eric is a nice guy," Bella said at last, "but I just don't think I'm interested."

"Well I happen to know that he is," Angela replied. She regarded Bella with a fond expression and shook her head. "I still can't believe you walked home alone the other night."

"I know," Bella gave her a guilty smile, "and I'm a cop's daughter too."

"You should have taken a cab," Angela remonstrated, "or let Eric walk you home."

"Like I said, I'm just not interested," Bella kept her gaze on her muffin as she ate. The two girls sat in a companionable silence for a moment.

"Is it the other guy?" Angela ventured at last.

"Huh?" Bella gave her a blank look.

"That guy you were talking to at the bar."

Bella laughed and sipped at her coffee. "I talked to a lot of people there, Ang, I think you might need to be a bit more specific."

"Okay then," Angela nodded, "he was tall, messy copper hair," she put her head to one side as she thought and I could see myself in her mind's eye, "cute, actually more like striking, and he didn't take his eyes off you the whole time he was there."

"Really?" Bella thought for a moment. "He didn't make a move so maybe he wasn't that interested."

If only she knew.

"Bella," Angela was saying, "I saw the way he was looking at you."

"Yeah, right," Bella tried to shrug it off but Angela was persistent.

"No really, a blind man could have seen it. I've seen him around campus, maybe you'll bump into him sometime."

"Maybe," Bella agreed. She said nothing more but reached behind her to pull her ponytail over her shoulder, and sat there twirling her hair around her fingers; something she always did when she was feeling thoughtful. I watched as Angela turned the conversation to their plans for the weekend ahead. Bella listened at first and then her attention seemed to wander. After a while her gaze turned inward and I saw the faintest hint of a smile on her lips.

* * * * *

The days passed slowly. I became attuned to Bella's every movement; the way she bit her lip when she was thinking, how she wound her fingers through her hair when she was distracted; her easy smiles and blushes; and interwoven through it all, her scent. No matter how much I had tried to acclimate myself, it was still as provocative as ever.

I was sitting in my usual spot in the lecture hall as the other students began to arrive and take their seats when I detected an early trace of Bella's scent. Seconds later she appeared in the doorway. The weather had been steadily getting colder as the winter took a firmer hold, and so she was rugged up against the chill. She struggled up the stairs and found an empty seat. She usually sat on the right. She dropped her bag and stood with her back to the front of the room as she began to shrug off her heavy overcoat. Her scarf got snarled on the collar and I smiled as she bit her lip in concentration as she disentangled herself. The coat was slipping down her shoulders as her gaze wandered around the room and found mine. We stared at each other for a frozen moment before she blushed sand looked down. That delightful rush of colour in her face pulled me further into her orbit every time I saw it. The coat was eventually removed and stuffed onto the empty seat beside her. Bella dug out her notebook and dropped down into the seat with a sigh of relief.

I smiled to myself as I watched other students arrive and have to contort and fumble their way out of their outer layers. Of course, winter was no bother to me, but I had to go through the charade all the same. The coat beside me looked like it was from an army surplus store, but was a customised cashmere pea coat, courtesy of Alice, who revelled in adapting styles to suit our unique physiology. As the latest batch of students settled, I turned my gaze back to Bella only to discover with mild shock that she was already watching me. She held my gaze long enough to make sure that I had noticed her gaze, before offering me a brief smile and then turning around to face the front of the lecture hall. Such a small moment, and yet it heralded a subtle change between us.

After that, Bella's eyes began to seek me out more and more as the days went by. I wondered at this. Of course humans noticed us; we were too attractive to be invisible but their primitive instinct for self-preservation made most people shy away, but not my Bella. I checked myself at that. I couldn't call her mine, I had no claim on her, she was free to choose, and yet I knew that I was completely and irreversibly hers.

"Dude, just _talk_ to her," Emmett finally snapped in exasperation when I returned home one evening and slumped into one of the armchairs in the living room.

"I have to agree," Rosalie chimed in as both of us looked at her in surprise. "Come on," she said defensively, "you watch her at college and then you come home every night _reeking_ of her, I don't see it making you any happier."

Emmett took a deep sniff. "Hmmm, she _does_ have quite a flavour, doesn't she?"

A snarl broke through my lips before his words even had a chance to register, making Emmett laugh and spread his hands in a placatory gesture.

"Easy, I'm just sayin'," he said. "You've gotta admit that my girl's got a point," he went on, earning a smile of satisfaction from Rosalie. "Why don't you just man up and say something? What's the worst that can happen?"

I hesitated. The worst that could happen was that I could talk to her, win her smiles and trust, all the while running the risk that one day I would lose all control and sink my teeth into her soft and vulnerable throat. The mere thought of it made my thirst flare.

Emmett tasted the air again and gave me a nod of approval as if from one connoisseur to another. I didn't like Emmett's reaction at all, and I had noticed over the last few days that Jasper seemed well disposed towards Bella as well. They had both noticed her appeal although fortunately her scent seemed to have the only a fraction of the appeal that it held for me. Still, it bothered me that her blood was sweet to them. Jasper's control was good, but he didn't need temptation placed in his path. I wondered if Alice would be able to keep an eye on that side of things; yet another threat to monitor where Bella was concerned.

_I'm on it, Edward_. Alice's mental reply came hard on the heels of my decision, making me smile.

Emmett saw this and raised an eyebrow. "Try to go easy on yourself, Edward. Sometimes they just smell too good. I'm impressed that you lasted this long."

"You're not helping things, Emmett." It wasn't Bella's fault she smelled so good.

"Sorry," he had the grace to look shamefaced. _I really am sorry, Edward. You've got the strength to resist in a way that I never could_. _ I know when it happened to me …, _he reminisced, taking me back with him half a century, to a farm at dusk where a woman was outside watering her garden. The air was thick with the aromas of herbs as the water stirred up the fragrant leaves, and there was little noise save for the sound of the water hitting the ground and the steady crone of insects. Emmett was hunting in the forest that bordered the property, and it would have been an unremarkable evening like any other, except a sudden night breeze that fanned the woman's scent into the forest and across Emmett's path.

I groaned quietly. As if my own first for Bella wasn't enough.

_I know. I didn't even last half a second. There wasn't even time to think of resisting._

His memory became too explicit for me to stand; the warmth, the unbelievable pleasure of the taste, the satisfaction. I got up and looked around wildly, I had to get out of there.

"Want me to come?" Emmett said as he gave me a sympathetic look.

"Sure," I muttered, "just don't get in my way."

"Let's go."

As soon as we cleared the house we broke into a run. I was a few lengths ahead of Emmett in seconds, the gap between us widening as I picked up the pace.

_Veer left_, Emmett instructed, and I began to slow my stride. He'd caught the scent of a small herd of deer about half a mile away. I stopped and waited for Emmett to catch up. I couldn't even pretend to muster any enthusiasm for an aroma that was even under the best of circumstances, less than mouth-watering. Compared to Bella's scent, the smell was sour and unappetising.

I sighed. "Come on," I said, though I knew that forcing the blood down my throat would do little to quench my thirst. We both shifted into a hunting crouch and let the scent lead us forward.

* * * * *

It was colder when we returned home. The night had seen a light dusting of snow that had melted and refrozen, coating everything with a thin sheet of ice. Alice sat inside the house waiting for me on the top step of the step of the third floor, near my bedroom.

_Feel better?_

I shook my head and sank down to sit on the step beside her with a sigh.

"I don't know what I'm doing to do," I confessed in a whisper.

_Neither do I_, Alice replied, leaning over to rest her head on my shoulder. I looked at her in surprise. Alice looked up at me, and for a brief moment she gave me access to her visions; I sat and watched as the images flickered, some too hazy to make out, others appearing with crystal clarity. I saw myself standing in the sunlight of an open meadow. I knew that place, and had just enough time to make out an indistinct figure sitting beside me before Alice's vision changed again. The images disintegrated as countless tiny choices rearranged the future again. Incredibly, just before the visions collapsed in on themselves I caught a glimpse of myself laughing.

_That one's my favourite_, Alice confessed. _Your future is shifting around so much I can't keep up with it_. She stopped and flickered through a vast collection of other recent visions for me, all blurry and vague.

"Something's going on," she said aloud, "you seem to be at a crossroads at the moment."

I had to laugh at that. "Thank you, Gypsy Alice, should I cross your palm with silver to find out more?"

She nudged me with her shoulder as a smile played on her lips.

"Will today be alright?" I felt apprehensive.

"I don't see you killing anyone today."

"What about Bella?" the sense of dread wasn't abating.

"She's fine too," Alice assured me. "Now go get dressed, we've got lectures to get to."

* * * * *

The drive to college was quiet. I was preoccupied with thoughts of Bella, and Emmett's subsequent guilt over sharing his lapse with me wasn't helping. Alice's gaze was turned inward, no doubt checking all the future possibilities she had access to. I was beginning to feel like a liability on the family now. If my self-control wavered for an instant the whole family would be compromised and they would have to move again. Perhaps they would be happier without me around, but could I leave the family again? More importantly, could I bring myself to leave Bella?

I gave myself a mental shake. In human years I was an old man, and yet here I was in the flush of first love, behaving like the young man the world believed me to be. My physical body had been in stasis for years, and now it was making its needs known to me. Suddenly the axis of my life had shifted, and Bella was at the middle of it. I suppose it was simple really, after eighty years without much distraction any change was going to be fascinating. Underpinning everything was the matter of her scent. It was the most bittersweet torture to make myself endure it every day, and yet I did it gladly. Was the danger it could put my family in really worth it?

"Relax, Edward," Jasper advised in a placid tone, sending waves of calm to me as he tried to sooth my jagged nerves. "You'll be fine. If I can manage it after _my_ lifestyle, you can do it no problem."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," I replied, wishing I could trust myself as much as he did.

Bella hadn't arrived, but I could hear the sound of her truck approaching. I leaned against the side of the car to wait. Alice and Jasper stayed with me, and I was thankful for their silent support, although neither of them could empathise with my fixation. Alice had never tasted human blood, and Jasper had never found one that captivated his thirst in the way that Bella had.

I watched as Bella drove into view. Her expression was intent as she handled the curves, and I soon realised why. The roads were slick with ice and everyone was driving with more care than usual. I was pleased to see that she was taking the added risk seriously. She parked not too far from me, but she hadn't seen me standing against the car staring at her. A part of me wondered what she would do when she did, another blushing smile would be my first guess. Then again she might surprise me. She was after all, perhaps the only person that could.

After carefully getting out she made her way to the back of the truck to set off across the car park. Her footing slipped on the ice and she let out an undignified yelp before clutching at the truck for balance. She stepped and slithered around the back of the truck in a drunken stagger that made me smile. I didn't look at Alice to see what she was thinking of my reaction, I was having too much fun watching Bella. Maybe I could go talk to her, offer her a hand until she was off the slick pavement. No, I shouldn't. I hesitated, not knowing what to do, and ignored Alice's sigh of disappointment. I hadn't worn gloves; my hands would be even colder than usual-

Bella looked up and our eyes met, just as the world intruded.

Alice gasped; a tiny sound that sound of distress that snapped me to attention. She grasped my wrist as I scanned her thoughts, wondering what she had seen, wondering if it was something I was going to do. It turns out what she was seeing had nothing to do with me at all. Tyler had chosen to take the turn into the car park at reckless speed. He hadn't taken the icy conditions into account and it was a choice that should send him skidding across a patch of ice.

Alice's vision was only a second before the reality. I looked up to see his van rounding the corner as I was still watching the conclusion that had caused Alice to grab at me. This vision had nothing and everything to do with me, because Tyler's van was going to skid across the car park and crush the woman who was the focal point of my world. Bella was standing in exactly the wrong place at the wrong time.

_Not her_.

Alice's vision began to shift, but there was no time to check the outcome for good or bad. I launched myself across the car park, between the skidding van and Bella who stood clutching at her truck, apparently too shocked to move. She didn't see me, I was moving too fast for human eyes to track, and caught her by the waist to yank her out of the way.

I held her cradled to my chest as I fell to the ground, all the while conscious of her fragile body. I heard her head crack against the ice and groaned aloud. I didn't have time to check her condition because the van was still grating and squealing as it compacted into the side of Bella's truck where she had been standing. The metal contorted above us as the van shifted, almost as if the danger was actively seeking her out.

I'd already done too much but even knowing it was a mistake couldn't stop me. I dropped Bella, hearing the breath get knocked out of her as I threw my hands out and braced myself, catching the van before it could hit her. The force of the impact threw me back into the truck and I felt the frame buckle beneath my shoulders as I lifted it slightly off the ground to stop the skid. The van shuddered to a stop against my unyielding arms. I looked down and almost swore. Would the catastrophes never end? Bella's legs were directly underneath the tires, or at least they would be if I were to set the van down. I gave the van a slight shove so that it rocked away from me and scooped Bella up into my arms as I dragged away from danger for the third time that morning.

Her body was a limp weight in my arms. Was she conscious? How badly was she hurt? Had I done more harm than good in my rescue attempt? I let the van drop, not caring as it crashed to the pavement and two of the windows shattered from the sudden impact.

I was in the middle of a crisis. How much ad she seen? Had anyone else seen me stop the van? Seen me lift it off her? Those were the questions that should have been uppermost in my mind, and yet all I could do was gently move her hair away from her a face with a hand that trembled for the first time in decades. I couldn't worry about exposure, didn't care about the consequences. All I could feel was the heat of her soft body pressed again mine.

The first instinctive fear at Alice's vision was the greatest. As the screaming of witnesses erupted into a circus around us, I leaned over her to examine her face, hoping she wasn't bleeding anywhere.

Her eyes were open, staring up at me in shock.

Our gaze was locked for a moment before she groaned and struggled to push herself up into a sitting position with a groan. It was with monumental effort that I remembered to let her go and shift aside to give her room to move. I wanted to clutch her to me and run my hands over her to make sure she was safe.

_Mine._

"Bella," Tyler was slumped over the steering wheel, blood pouring profusely from a cut on his temple. The smell of it wasn't even a distraction, not with Bella in front of me. "I'm so sorry, the ice, I-,"

"I'm okay," she called out to reassure him.

"You cracked your head when you fell," I said, "so you should probably get that seen to." I probed gently at her head and felt a large lump already beginning to form. She winced as my fingertips ghosted over it.

People were beginning to flock towards the scene of the accident, an excited babble of voices as cell phones were produced and the emergency services called.

_Edward, Alice called, Jasper and I have to get out of here, the blood-_

I looked over and nodded once before turning my attention back to the woman in my arms; her eyes looked a little dilated indicating that she had concussion. I had two medical degrees but could not betray our carefully cultivated lives to treat her. For the time being she lay cradled in my arms, and I held her as if I was trying to hold a bubble. She was so fragile, so _warm_. Moving on instinct alone my head dipped closer to hers, my nostrils flaring slightly as her scent swam around me in a heady cloud. Her heart was pounding strongly, elevated from shock and stress. Delicious. Venom flooded my mouth and my head dipped a fraction closer.

_So close_.

"You saved me," Bella said, wincing as she flexed her wrists. Her voice called my attention back to the present and I jerked my head back. I could smell traces of her blood now; she must have scraped her hands on the ground when I pulled her down. I flicked a glance at the mangled van behind us, and mercifully my fear at what might have been dulled my thirst.

"From a college senior," I replied, trying to play the situation down for all it was worth, "didn't exactly take Superman."

"The van," Bella was looking confused but determined to figure things out, "you stopped the van-,"

"Bella," I breathed as I held her gaze, watching her subside as my scent washed over her, "you need to get checked at the hospital, and you're going to need some rest, okay?"

"O-okay," she said, dazed.

I nodded, satisfied.

"But after that, you and I are going to have a little talk," she said, looking determined.

I blinked.

**A/N: Hope you're enjoying it, let me know what you think …**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.**_

**Ch7**

"_Bella," I breathed as I held her gaze, watching her subside as my scent washed over her, "you need to get checked at the hospital, and you're going to need some rest, okay?"_

"_O-okay," she said, dazed._

_I nodded, satisfied._

"_But after that, you and I are going to have a little talk."_

_I blinked._

*** * * * * **

"Ow," Bella put a hand to her head and seemed shocked to find that she was hurt. Relief that she had not been more seriously hurt swept through me, making me feel almost giddy for the first time in nearly a century. She blinked a few times as if trying to clear her eyes, and then looked up at me again. "How did you get to me so fast?"

My relief turned sour. Our eyes had met just before Tyler's van had gone into a skid but I had hoped she had forgotten that in the rush of events. Anxiety for my family bit at my mind.

"I was standing just a few feet away from you, Bella," I tried to keep my voice confident, almost cocky, trying to throw her off the scent.

Bella shifted in my arms and this time I allowed it, sliding away from her and standing up slowly. I took care to give the appearance that I was bracing myself against her truck in the small space between the two vehicles. I applied a slight pressure, hoping to smooth out the shape of my shoulders from the truck. Bella was inspecting her grazed hands and I shot a quick glance at the metal behind me. Not good enough. I reached under to brace my hand beneath the worst of the dent and popped the metal out into a fuller shape. Not perfect, but certainly better than it had been. Only seconds had passed, and I looked down to see Bella staring up at me, biting her lip as she pondered what I had said. I kept my expression smooth.

More people were surrounding us now, mostly other students pushing through to see the damage. All I could hear was a confused babble of voices and a roar of thought. I scanned the area quickly, trying not to wince at the sheer volume of it all, but could only make out concern for Bella. She was looking decidedly uncomfortable from all the attention, and stunned to find herself in such a predicament. She shifted her weight again, getting ready to stand, and I reached down to put my hand on her shoulder.

"Stay down for now," I cautioned. I found myself wishing that Carlisle was here; his calm manner in the face of crisis would have been sorely welcome. I held a medical degree myself, but theoretical knowledge was nothing compared to his centuries of medical practice.

"I'm cold," she commented, and I saw that her lips were quivering from a combination of cold and shock. I wished I could warm her.

"Help will be here soon," I said in a soothing voice, and dared to reach down and rub my hand over her shoulders.

She blinked and subsided against one of the truck's tires. "You were over there," she said, lifting her head to indicate the direction with a jerk of her chin.

I stilled.

"Wow," I forced my lips into a grin, "how bad did you hit your head?"

"I saw you," she said, huffing out her breath in frustration.

"Bella, I was standing nearby that's how I was able to pull you out of the way."

I held her gaze, trying to will her into accepting my story. It was after all, the only rational option available.

"Uh-uh," she said, shaking her head and sounding childish. Her bottom lip stuck out a little more now. Definitely stubborn.

I began to panic. How was I going to keep her quiet? I was going to have to destroy the evidence, if only I could get her to trust me.

"Bella," I said in a low voice, "please trust me." I needed her to trust me. I needed _her_.

She stiffened with realisation. "My name," she whispered.

"What?" I ducked my head to hear her over everyone's babble. The emergency services were on their way.

"I never told you my name," she said in a low voice.

I cursed my mental slip-up but rallied quickly.

"Sure you did," I said with a broad smile, "at the bar the other night, and we've talked in the bookshop."

"Oh," she blinked, "right." She gazed up at me through her lashes, "and you're-," she looked hopeful.

_I'm yours, and you're mine_.

I swallowed. It was now or never.

"Edward," I said, giving her what I hoped was an encouraging smile, "asking you to trust me."

There was a moment's silence as she considered this. I could hear sirens in the distance and knew we didn't have much time. I scanned everyone in the immediate vicinity again and couldn't detect any danger. If anything, people were surprised to see me beside Bella, but thankfully they all seemed to conclude that I must have been nearby when the accident happened.

Bella was the only one unwilling to accept the explanation, but given the lump on her head and the obvious concussion she would be the least reliable witness. She would be confused … in shock, who wouldn't be? No-one would consider her version of events given all the other people at the scene. Perhaps my family would be safe for the time being. The very thought of my family made me wince; there was going to be hell to pay.

The emergency crew arrived and I watched their slow progress with mild frustration. I could prise the vehicles apart with one hand to speed up the process, but I was already in enough trouble for one day. After a lot of effort they had made enough space to get to Bella with a stretcher.

"Edward?" I looked away from Bella with considerable reluctance to see Brett Warner standing in front of me. At last a stroke of luck in my direction. He was a registered nurse as well as an EMT, and I knew him from the hospital. "You okay?"

"Hey, Brett. I'm fine, nothing hit me but Bella knocked her head when I pulled her out of the way."

That was enough to satisfy Brett and he immediately turned his attention to her, not noticing as she glared at me. She wasn't one to seek out attention so this was probably her worst nightmare. She suffered Brett's examination and questions, giving a quiet groan when she realised people were snapping pictures with the phones. She hadn't contradicted my story though, which gave me faint hope.

The second EMT tried to insist I be treated, but it wasn't too hard to talk him out of it. After all, my father Carlisle would be waiting for us at the hospital, and he could see to me there. All it took was a calm manner and a soothing voice, and my suggestions were accepted at face value. Except for Bella.

She rolled her eyes when they put a neck brace on her and muttered in embarrassment as she was manoeuvred onto a stretcher. I made a move to walk away but felt my coat snag. I looked back to see that Bella had snagged my coat with her free hand.

"I don't suppose you want to make yourself useful and come with me?" she asked, dropping her hand as soon as I turned around.

"You probably should, Edward," Brett chimed in, "we'll need your statement for the report."

"Looks like I'm staying," I smiled at Bella, and followed her as the stretcher was loaded into the ambulance. I climbed into the back and took a seat by the ambulance.

"So," Brett had climbed into the passenger seat and turned around to peer at us both, "you want sirens and flashing lights?"

"Only if you promise to kill me now and get it over and done with," Bella snapped back, her face crimson with embarrassment now.

Interesting, she seemed to avoid the spotlight as much as I did.

The ambulance took a while to get out of the car park but a warning peal of its sirens cleared the last of the stragglers out of its way.

"How did you stop the van?" she asked again. A quick glance at the front showed that Brett wasn't listening to our conversation. I leaned forward to take her hand – so warm – and gaze at her eyes. Her pupils were still dilated and beads of sweat were forming on her brow. "There was an accident, right?" she frowned, "and you stopped the van."

She was acting more confused now and repeating herself, classic symptoms of concussion.

I was about to murmur a denial when she blinked at me twice. "I'm sleepy," she sighed, "do you mind if I have a nap?"

"No, you need to stay awake," I said, brushing her hair off her face. The rocking of the ambulance seemed to be lulling her to sleep, so I cupped her face in my hands. It was like trying to hold a dandelion in a high gale, but the shock of my hold hands sharpened her gaze.

"You're cold," she commented.

"No gloves," I answered smoothly.

I glanced at Brett again. There was nothing in his thoughts to worry me. As far as they were concerned she had a simple case of concussion.

My first priority when we reached the hospital would be to see Carlisle. I followed the stretcher as they unloaded her, chaffing at the slow human pace, and trailed it inside. Carlisle was in his office at the other end of the hall and I could hear that he was alone. I waited to make sure Bella was settled before setting off to see him.

"Carlisle," I murmured as I approached his office, knowing he would hear me approaching.

_Edward? What's wrong?_ Carlisle looked up and pushed his paperwork aside when I appeared in his office doorway.

"There was a car accident, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

_What did you do?_

I ran my fingers through my hair in exasperation. "What _could_ I do? I couldn't just stand there and let it happen, I couldn't let the van crush-," I broke off and swallowed hard, horrified at what might have been.

_I don't understand, how were you involved?_

A van hit some ice and skidded straight towards her. She would have been crushed between two vehicles." I looked at him in anguish and he nodded for me to continue. "There wasn't even time to think, I just … got to her and pulled her out the way."

_You did the right thing_.

"Carlisle, she _saw_ me. I've put us all in danger."

_We don't know that_. Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder. "If it comes to that, we'll leave, but let's just see what happens. What has she said so far?"

"Not much, she's confused and has concussion."

_Something in our favour_, Carlisle noted. I nodded.

"I think she'll follow my story, but she's wanting an explanation."

Carlisle nodded to himself as he considered this.

_We'll just have to see what happens, but for now it sounds like I have a patient to check on_.

"Please," I said, hearing the desperation in my voice, "I think I hurt her."

_You hurt her?_

"She got the concussion when I pulled her out of the way," I admitted, shamefaced.

_From what I gather, it could've been a lot worse. Don't beat yourself up over this, Edward, you've saved her life._

I sighed as I followed him out of his office.

Carlisle draped a fatherly arm around my shoulders as we walked, and I shoved my hands into my pockets and stared down, the very image of a penitent son.

_I'm proud of you, Edward. This is quite a turn of events for you._

I shook my head at the irony of saving Bella and then trying to save her from myself.

* * * * *

I followed Carlisle to the Emergency Room and sat in the corridor outside listening to the hospital full of thoughts. It seemed that Tyler was worse off than Bella; having sustained an impressive crack to the head when his head connected with the drivers' side window and then the steering wheel for good measure. He was bleeding profusely – as head wounds did – but the smell of his blood was acrid and sour compared to Bella's.

Bella was wheeled off for x-rays and my impatience got the better of me. I made my way to the radiology room and when the nurse stepped out on an errand I inspected the print results. Her head was fine, but she had a concussion. The fact still remained that I had hurt her.

Carlisle found me there.

_You're looking better_.

I stared at the prints, not wanting to respond.

Carlisle reached past me and flicked on the lightbox to illuminate Bella's delicate bone structure.

_Nice work, she'll be fine, but we'll keep her in overnight to be on the safe side._

Carlisle's approval left me with mixed emotions. He was pleased although he may not approve of my methods. What would he think had me known my real motivation?

"I need to see her," I said in a blunt tone.

_She's sticking to your story, Edward._ Carlisle was still studying the prints. _She has a few old contusions, she must have had an accident-prone youth._

"I'm not sure she's grown out of it, she seems to have a knack for attracting trouble."

_Then it's just as well she has you, _Carlisle replied. I was still pondering that when he left to return to the ward. I followed slowly, still thinking.

By the time I got back to the ward, Carlisle was inside keeping a running commentary as he worked with the two victims, although he was careful to spend more time with Tyler. He didn't want to be around Bella any more than necessary in case she made a connection. One glance at his eyes would be all it took for her to realise there was something not quite right. I could explain my eyes as a penchant for novelty contacts, but Carlisle? Definitely not. I sat outside listening to the conversation in the room behind me. Waiting with a pinched expression while they staunched Tyler's bleeding and swabbed Bella's scraped hands. The harsh antiseptic muted the sweet metallic tones of her blood, but still it continued to sing to me, a siren song without end.

Tyler was still babbling his guilt in an endless stream of words, worrying that he had almost killed her. The damn fool couldn't stop talking about it. I looked at Bella through his eyes. Her eyes were tight and a slight downturn to her mouth hinted at the onset of nausea. Tyler didn't notice this, although his eyes were drawn to the curve of her breasts as one of the nurses urged Bella to sit up a little more in on hospital gurney.

I gave a low growl before I could stop myself and Carlisle heard me.

_Edward? Is everything alright?_

"I'm fine," I muttered under my breath knowing he would hear me. I wasn't fine, far from it in fact. "He has no right to look at her like that."

_He's keeping his hands to himself, don't worry_. Carlisle's thoughts were flavoured with amusement. I snorted to myself, glad that at least one of us was finding some amusement in the situation.

"How did you get out the way?" Tyler asked. I could see his thoughts, the last thing he had seen was Bella staring at his oncoming van in horror.

"Um-," she paused.

I sat outside with my fists clenched, not wanting to even breathe as she hesitated.

Tyler was starting to wonder if he had confused her with his question when she finally answered.

"Edward was standing next to me, he pulled me out of the way."

I sighed and then realised I had a rush of pleasure when I heard her say my name.

"Who?" Tyler was confused now.

"Edward, you know, the guy that saved me."

_Huh, that's weird, I didn't even see anyone near her, but it all happened so fast._

I watched as Tyler considered Bella again. _Pretty. Maybe this is my chance to ask her out, to say sorry. Even Jessica could let that one slide._

Pretty? The idiot boy was blind, she was beautiful. I'd heard enough.

I stood up and walked towards the door. Caution be damned, I had to see her. I wanted to hear her say my name again. One minute I was standing in the hallway, the next I was walking towards her bed listening to her heart rate accelerate as she looked at me.

Tyler opened his mouth to speak again but stopped when he saw me enter the room and frowned.

_Is that him? Are they dating? _Tyler wasn't happy to see me there, already resenting the perceived competition. I dismissed him with a glance and focused on the young woman before me, seating myself at the foot of her bed.

"So, what's the verdict?"

"I feel fine," her jaw jutted out a little, "but they won't let me go. How come you're not on a gurney like the rest of us?"

She was impatient, and I couldn't help but smile at her resilience.

"No blood, no foul," I grinned. "Guess I was the lucky one."

"Someone had to be," Carlisle smiled as he reappeared at Bella's bedside. He glanced up at him as he checked her vision with a penlight, and her mouth opened in a little 'o' of surprise when she saw him. I gave an inward groan. She had made the connection.

"Tyler here's going to be fine, his cuts are superficial so he can go home, but _you_ young lady," he smiled as he ran his hand gently over her scalp until he found the bump in her hair, "are staying put."

I was unprepared for the motion that surged through me. I had seen Carlisle work with humans countless times. Years ago I had even assisted him informally, but only where there was no blood involved. Sitting here at the foot of her bed watching him run his hands through her hair, I felt a stab of envy, wishing I could interact with her the way he did. Wished I could touch her without fear of hurting her.

Bella winced as Carlisle's fingers explored her bump, and I flinched where I sat.

"Is that sore?"

"I'm fine," she assured him. I filed this away for later reference. She didn't like to admit weakness. I felt proud of her in that moment. That someone so fragile should wish to appear strong. "Are you sure I can't go home?"

"Quite sure," Carlisle smiled. "Is there someone we can call for you? Parents? Friends?"

Bella gave this some thought. "I should let my flatmate know or she'll worry."

"Boyfriend?" the word had slipped out before I could stop myself.

Her eyes flickered to me and I watched as her cheeks flushed becomingly. "No boyfriend," she admitted in a quiet voice after checking to make sure that Tyler was otherwise occupied. She looked back at Carlisle as she jerked her chin towards me. "Does _he_ get to go home?"

"Edward does, yes," Carlisle agreed in a mild voice, "he's absolutely fine."

All evidence to the contrary. I'm sure the hospital staff would be concerned to know they had the undead in their midst.

"Have you got a phone?" I asked.

"In my bag," Bella replied automatically as she reached up to rub her temple. Carlisle noticed this and murmured a request for painkillers to the nurse.

"I picked it up when you were loaded into the ambulance, I'll leave you to make your call," I offered as I stood up.

"Don't go too far," she cautioned me, "we have some talking to do."

I didn't need to look at Carlisle to know he was monitoring me.

_Be gentle, Edward. _I nearly snorted at that. As if I could be anything _but_ gentle with her.

"I'll be just outside," I offered, and steeled myself to walk away.

I paced up and down in the corridor, listening to Bella's conversation; the panic when Angela heard what had happened, Bella's reassurance and grudging admission that she would be staying overnight.

"Can I bring you anything?" Angela offered. I smiled at that, grateful that Bella had such loving support.

"Some pajamas," Bella replied without hesitation, "I don't want to end up in a hospital gown that flashes my butt every time I turn sideways."

I had to hide my grin at that. She had a point, but I wasn't sure the view would be unwelcome. I reassessed that opinion when Tyler started to consider Bella again.

"I'll see you soon," Angela promised, "I'm so glad you're okay. Just, listen, try to stay out of trouble until I get there, okay?"

"Ha ha," Bella replied in a dry tone before she hung up.

I reappeared in the doorway before she could call for me, and saw her eyes widen in surprise.

"Everything okay?" I asked as I resumed my seat on her bed. Her fingers were plucking at the blanket and I wished I could take her hands in mine.

"Fine, Angela will be here soon with some things for me," she muttered. Her gaze slid towards Tyler again and I watched her lips tighten, relieved to see that she found his attention as unappealing as I did. Her head jerked up as she heard what I had already detected; a babble of voices that was steadily growing louder as they approached. One voice stood out shrill with panic, Jessica.

Bella and I exchanged a complicit look of understanding as the group erupted into the room.

"Oh my god, are you guys okay?" Jessica was loud in her concern, some of the others following were a little more cautious in their well wishes.

I watched as Bella smiled and nodded, waving away their concern, blushing again under the new scrutiny. Tyler by comparison, was lapping up the attention, hamming it up for the crowd as Jessica cooed over his bandaged head. Bella's eyes tightened at the level of noise in the room and I stood up, motioning at Bella that I would be back before stepping out into the corridor.

"Carlisle?"

_Yes, what is it, Son?_

"Tyler's got company and they're getting loud, can he be moved?"

_His tests were fine so he can be discharged soon enough. I'll send someone down._

I stepped back in a moment later and resumed my seat on the bed. "What about her?" Jessica gestured to Bella.

I gritted my teeth. For a supposed friend, she seemed good at forgetting her name when it suited her. Her thoughts were like a shallow pond. Even though Bella and Tyler had a legitimate excuse for being there, Jessica resented the fact they were in a room together, practically side-by-side in bed as far as she was concerned.

"Concussion," I bit out, and forced myself to offer a winning smile when Jessica looked at me in surprise. "She'll be staying in overnight."

"And you are-," Jessica looked me up and down and apparently liked what she saw, flicking her hair over her shoulders and jutting out her chest a little. Pathetic.

"This is Edward," Bella broke in before I could speak.

"Edward, right," Jessica's smile widened. It was as if Bella hadn't spoken at all.

The nurse sighed and started to shoo the teenagers as if they were ducks. "That's it, enough already, everybody _out_."

The nurse was ruthless. Her tolerance limits thanks to a week of shiftwork were wearing thin and she had no time to waste on flirty college students. The room was cleared within minutes.

Bella and I stared at each other.

"Alone at last," she said with a wry smile, "and you owe me an explanation."

I matched her stare for stare.

"What do you want?"

She blinked at that, and for a moment looked completely vulnerable; and expression that would haunt me.

"You said you'd tell," she began.

"You hit your head," I said in a gentle tone, "it's understandable that you're confused."

"I'm fine," she said in a fierce whisper, "stop treating me like an idiot and tell me what I saw."

She wanted the truth, which was only fair. It frustrated me to deny her such a simple request, but I had to.

"So what do you think you saw?" I leaned back with practised ease.

"You weren't anywhere near me, you were on the other side of the car park. I saw you just before Tyler's van started to skid," she broke off, frowning as she worked to remember, her bottom lip trembled and I ached that I was the cause of such stress. "The van was going to crush us _both_, but you just put your hands out and stopped it. You lifted it up and got me out the out the way."

I kept my gaze steady.

"So let me get this straight," I said when she paused, "you're saying I lifted a van off you."

"Right," she nodded.

"With my bare hands."

This time the nod was a little less certain.

"You know, no-one is going to believe you."

Bella's fingers had found a loose thread on the blanket, and she wound it around her finger as she drew in a long shuddering breath. "I'm not going to tell anyone," she said at last, "but if I'm going to lie for someone, then there had better be a damn good reason."

I stared at her and worked to conceal my shock. She was going to keep my secret, but why?

Trust.

I had asked her to trust me, and now she was expecting the same courtesy.

"Can you just thank me and be done with it?"

"Thank you," she said in a too-calm voice, and sat waiting.

"You're not going to let this go are you?"

"Nope," she replied, raising an eyebrow in silent challenge.

"Have it your way," I shrugged, "but I hope you can handle the disappointment."

Her face flushed again and she looked away to stare blindly at the wall before looking back at me. She bit her lip and I felt my heart dip at the pain evident on her face. "If you don't really care, then why did you even bother?" she said in a quiet voice.

I had been expecting anger and confusion, but not her quiet acceptance. Her question took me unawares and or the first time I felt my mask slip.

"I don't know," I admitted staring at my hands. "I didn't want to see you hurt."

"Truly?" her voice was quieter now.

I nodded, still looking down. Her hands appeared in my field of vision as she reached over to tentatively cover my hands in hers. She flinched at the chill but did not move away. I let her hands warm mine.

"Then that's enough for me," she said.

I looked up and was startled to see a slight smile on her face.

"For now," she added.

* * * * *

We were sitting together in silence when I heard Angela approaching. Her thoughts were spiky with panic as she looked for Bella's room number, but when she appeared in the doorway she gave a sigh of relief.

"Bells?" she whispered as she approached. To her credit, she flicked me a cursory glance but kept her attention on her friend as she approached Bella's bedside. "Oh honey, what have you managed to do this time?"

"I'm okay," Bella assured Angela with a smile, a more genuine one this time I couldn't help but note. "I just bumped my head."

"Right," Angela scoffed as she smoothed Bella's hair with a gentle hand, "before you nearly got creamed by that bonehead's truck."

I had to turn my burst of laughter into a cough, but Bella shot me an amused look that told me she wasn't fooled. She was too perceptive for her own good.

"I've got a concussion so they say I have to stay here tonight, but I'm out tomorrow."

"I'll call and see when you're getting discharged so that I can come and get you," Angela promised.

"What about your lecture?" Bella objected, but Angela waved her to silence.

"I won't hear of it," Angela said in a firm voice that was totally undermined by her warm smile. "Now," she lifted a small carry back up onto the bed, "here's your sleep wear and uh-," she shot me a glance, "other stuff, so you'll be able to get comfortable. I'm sorry," she broke off, shaking her head and extending her hand to me, "I'm Angela, and you are-," she gave me an expectant look.

I was prepared this time, and had been resting my hand on the cool metal frame of the bed. "Edward," I said with a smooth smile as we shook hands, "head bumper, life saver," Bella groaned at this, "and now leaving." I stood up to make my exit.

"Oh you don't have to go just because I'm here," Angela put in hurriedly. I dipped into her thoughts again, and was pleased to note they were warm with concern for Bella. She was shifting through her memories rapidly now, and I could see the connection was going to be made. It was time for me to go.

"I can see you two have some catching up to do so if you'll excuse me," I inclined my head, "ladies." With that I made my exit.

"Wow," I heard Angela sigh.

"I know, he's a strange one," Bella commented.

"Strange doesn't quite cover it," Angela replied. I paused halfway down the corridor, listening in. "Tell me you got his number."

"Uh-," Bella began.

"Oh Hells Bells," Angela sighed now, "a man that fine, who saves your life and you've got nothing? I swear I don't know what I'm going to do with you."

"My head hurts," Bella said in a small voice, obviously trying to throw Angela off the scent. I smiled at the little girl pitch to her voice.

"I'll get the nurse," Angela said, "maybe she'll know who he was. I know the two of you have met before anyway."

"You do?" Bella was surprised, and I have to admit, so was I.

"Sure, at the bar the other week. Remember? I saw the two of you talking at the bar. He was getting his flirt on with you then."

I frowned. Was I?

"Was he?" Bella echoed my sentiments.

"Oh sure, I don't forget the sight of you talking to someone like that in a hurry. The way he was looking at you-," Angela's voice trailed off as she reviewed her memory of the evening which, despite the alcohol involved, was pretty accurate.

"Yeah, right," Bella tried to shrug it off, but Angela was persistent.

"No really, a blind man could have seen it."

Bella said nothing. I would have given anything to read her thoughts in that moment.

For now though, it was all I could do to force myself to walk out of the hospital. It was time to go home and face the music.

_**A/N: Three cheers for the end of writer's block!**_

_**Reviews = love, and a nice little neck nibble from Edward. Rowr.**_


	8. Chapter 8

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Mayer owns Twilight, but oh, how I wish I owned Edward._

**Songlines Ch8**

I had been checked and cleared by Carlisle for the sake of appearances and had been cleared to leave. This was the right thing to do. It was the right way to behave, but I left the hospital with considerable reluctance and returned to campus. The lecture hall that afternoon was abuzz with talk of the near tragedy in the car park that morning. There were a couple of students who had used to accident as an excuse to ditch class but for the most part everyone was present and accounted for. I suffered through the lecture wishing I had been able to ditch the class as well. All I wanted to do was be with Bella.

I shook my head as I thought of this. I was behaving like a lovesick teenager. Worse, I was behaving like a stalker, a vampire stalker at that.

The lecture was – and I hadn't thought this possible – even more tedious than usual. I found myself staring at the walls, counting the moments until I could leave. It was only now that I realised how much of a distraction Bella was, how much she diverted my attention in a way that I welcomed. Her absence drained colour from the world. I stared at the carpet fibres on the floor.

A few people had approached me when I had made my way across campus, proffering hesitant questions about the accident, wanting information but wanting to get away from me even more.

"_Hey, you were at the accident this morning, everything okay?"_

"_I think Tyler is fine, he got scratched up some, but Bella has a concussion," I gave a worried frown, "they're keeping her in overnight."_

I smiled and answered their questions, looking concerned where appropriate, shrugging off their curiosity, doing what had to be done to keep the family safe.

Of course, another option could have been to shrug the incident off entirely in keeping with my reputation for being aloof. This had been considered and ultimately rejected. I would have felt unchivalrous had I expressed indifference, throwing Bella's trust back in her face. Again I marvelled that she was keeping my secret, wondering what had inspired such trust.

Leaving campus as soon as my final class for the day was finished, I got home to see Emmett waiting for me in the garage. I rolled my eyes at him as I parked the car.

_Hope you've got a good story to tell, Edward, because you've got some explaining to do._

I had been expecting this, and I had my story ready. Stepping inside, I saw Rosalie sitting on one of the living room couches, Esme by her side. Alice and Jasper had been standing at the windows watching for me, and Alice crossed the room quickly to throw her arms around me.

"I'm sorry we couldn't stay," she whispered into my shirtfront, "but you know why we had to leave."

My arms went around her shoulders to pull her in closer as I looked over her head at Jasper.

_Sorry we had to take off_, he apologised.

I shook my head at him, I could sympathise entirely.

"So," Rosalie was watching our display with a raised eyebrow, "what's the fallout from your noble gesture?"

"The situation seems manageable," I allowed with caution, releasing Alice so that she could return to Jasper's embrace. She was clearly distressed by the afternoon and blaming herself for not having seen the situation sooner. Nodding at Jasper I crossed over to the couch and sat down so that I could face the rest of the family that was there. Carlisle would be home from the hospital soon and I needed to talk to him. Rosalie wasn't about to be put off in the meantime though.

_Idiot_ she commented, but ended her tirade there as Emmett perched himself on the couch beside her. He reached over and took her hand with a broad smile and I had to wince as he began to plan various ways of taking his wife's mind of things later.

Alice was still looking troubled. Her gaze was unfocussed as she sat in Jasper's arms staring into a future that none of us could see. Occasionally her gaze flickered to me and she would bite her lip. Perhaps she was debating whether or not to share her visions but I trusted her to decide what was important amongst the countless possibilities that lay before us.

"Alice," Esme ventured at last, "what do you see?"

"So much," Alice replied in a whisper, "but nothing clear until Edward makes up his mind."

Everyone's gaze turned to me.

_No pressure_, Emmett grinned, _but it seems it's all up to you._

"Just tell me we don't have to move," Rosalie said, leaning forward and resting her hand on Emmett's knee. "You can't do this to us, Edward. Emmett and I only get a chance to get out of school and college once a decade, you can't deny us."

Emmett slid his arm around her shoulders and kissed her cheek, shooting me an apologetic look at he did so. _Hate to admit it, Bro, but my girl has a point._

I sighed and nodded at this as my mind sorted through the possibilities. Perhaps the whole family wouldn't have to move. After all, it seemed foolish to punish everyone for one person's mistake. It would be easy enough for me to-

"_No!"_ Alice burst out, startling everyone. "Edward, you can't. I won't let you."

"It's not up to you, Alice," I replied in a gentle tone, raising an eyebrow at Jasper who nodded at my silent request. Waves of calm washed over the room and everyone subsided once more.

Esme's eyes were on me, her golden eyes full of compassion.

_Stay_. It was her dearest wish that we remain together as a family. I gave her a brief smile, wishing I could reassure her further but I had no idea what I could offer at this point.

Rosalie gave a quiet huff as she looked at each of us in turn.

"So this is it? We're just going to _sit_ here?" she seethed. "Edward, I don't know what sort of stunt you thought you were pulling, but I swear if we have to move I'll-," she broke off as Esme touched her arm with a gentle hand. None of us wanted to hurt Esme, even Rosalie. Swallowing her words, she leaned into Emmett's sides, staring at me.

_I like it here,_ she challenged me, _and I don't want to leave just because of you_. Her mental words had the sting of a whiplash, but I had to concede that she had a point.

"I had to do something," I sighed, "I couldn't just let her die."

"Perhaps it would have been better if you had," Rosalie replied.

My head snapped up to meet her gaze at that. She had no idea. No way of understanding how I felt. Her attraction for Emmett had been borne of sentimentality and his blood had not stirred her the way Bella's did for me. I thought back to the night Emmett had burst into our lives.

"_Carlisle," we had looked up with a start at the wild tone in Rosalie's voice, and then had done nothing but sit and stare. She was bedraggled, covered in bits of twig and snow, blood smeared all over her clothes, but all of that was irrelevant when we saw what she carried. It was a mangled wreck of a man, surely one not long for this world. _

_She had surged into the room, settling his body onto the long dining table with more care than I had ever seen her express for another being. His face was swollen and cruised, dried blood crusting his brow, fresh blood continuing to ooze from numerous cuts and gouges._

_Carlisle had been quick to respond as Esme ran for water and towels, which she set on the table near the man's bloodied legs. _

"_What happened?" he was feeling the man's body carefully, his mind processing facts and checking symptoms with clinical precision. He didn't stop, didn't falter, but transitioned smoothly into his professional medical persona that he had honed over the centuries. Preserving human life was second nature to him, unlike the rest of us. I stood to the side, venom pooling in my mouth at the sight and scent of so much blood._

_Carlisle flicked me a quick glance. "Edward," he began._

"_I'm fine," I muttered and gave Rosalie an apologetic glance as retreated to the far side of the room. Esme followed me to provide moral support. I didn't need to be around the temptation, not when I had only just reformed my ways. Rosalie didn't look away from the man on the table at all. She stood by his side, smoothing his dark hair off his face as Carlisle worked, radiating fierce protection._

_At last Carlisle had straightened with a sigh, pushing a hand through his hair, careless of the blood._

"_I'm sorry," he began, "I've done all I can but he's not going to-,"_

"_He has to," Rosalie snarled, "please Carlisle, there must be something."_

_Carlisle rested a hand on her shoulder in a bid to offer what comfort he could. "He's too far gone, there's nothing I can-,"_

"_Yes there is," she said suddenly, her eyes shining with the tears she could not shed. "You can do it, Carlisle. Please, for me."_

_The room was silent save for the stuttering heartbeat of the body on the table before us._

"_Please," Rosalie asked again, her voice catching. We had never seen her look so vulnerable. Had never seen her beg. And now she was. "I can't do it myself, but you can. Only you." She looked down at the man's face, his skin pale from loss of blood and reached out a finger to gently trace a line on his face that hinted at dimples. "Don't leave me alone," she whispered._

"_Do you realise what you're asking me," Carlisle asked, looking agonised at her request. "What you'll be condemning him to."_

"_No less than what the rest of us face," Rosalie countered. Her eyes were flashing now, daring him to argue against his own actions of the past. Her shoulders slumped as she tried to stare him down. "Please?" this time her request was a question rather than an order. She chewed at her bottom lip, "I want him, Carlisle. I'll never ask for anything else if you do this for me."_

For three agonising days we had waited, listening to the man's screams as he howled against the flames that devoured him. The venom was swift as it overtook his defenceless body, and we had watched amazed as his body had healed and transformed into a titan in homespun.

Rosalie had never left his side, yet her devotion to Emmett was only a fraction of what I felt for Bella. Emmett's humanity had been consumed by a moment of compassion from a woman of peerless beauty. I was consumed by the scent of a human's blood that could lure me across the continents in search of her had I known she existed before now. But consuming her was the one thing I knew I could not do, the world being far more interesting with her in it, than the brief satisfaction of slacking my endless thirst.

"I could Not. Let. Her. Die," I ground out the words through clenched teeth. "If her blood had been spilled this morning the situation could have been _far_ worse. As it stands we are all relatively safe."

"You're sure?" Rosalie was cynical.

"I trust her," I shrugged, "and I'll continue to monitor the situation. If things deteriorate then I'll leave, no buts-," I said, holding up a hand to silence Alice who had opened her mouth again to protest. "And Alice can keep watch to see if anything major crops up."

"I agree with Edward," Jasper spoke up after a measured silence. "If he leaves now she'll get curious, if we stay then in time it will be as if nothing happened."

"Right," Rosalie scoffed at this but subsided again as Jasper soothed her. Emmett winked at me, his dimples flashing as he tried and failed to hide his smile.

"It'll be fine, Rose," Emmett assured her. "Eddy boy here will keep tabs."

I winced. He knew how much I hated that nickname.

Esme gave me a tentative smile as the mood of the room became a fraction more optimistic. The initial threat had passed and we would continue on as before, albeit more vigilant than ever.

"No-one else has to pay for my mistake," I said, "and that includes Bella."

"So everyone's staying," Alice gave a decisive nod. She leaned over to look at Rosalie. "Don't worry, everything's going to be fine, I see it."

Rosalie gazed at her and then sighed.

"Fine," she sighed her acceptance, "as long as we can stay I can put up with the situation for what it is."

I nodded, grateful for her grudging acquiescence.

"But I don't have to be happy about it," she added. "You're playing a dangerous game that could implicated us all, Edward. I just hope you know what you're doing."

I had no idea.

* * * * *

Carlisle arrived home from the hospital a few hours later. I sat waiting for him on the stairs, watching as he and Esme enjoyed a loving reunion before he glanced up and nodded. I nodded back, and went up the stairs to wait in the corridor before he appeared and I followed him into his office.

"She's fine," he said in response to my unspoken question. "She has some nausea which she is absolutely mortified about," I was surprised to see him grin at this, and saw his memory of Bella groaning over a stainless steel bowl, "but she'll make a full recovery."

Carlisle set down his satchel and took a seat at his desk as he gestured for me to do the same.

"You did the right thing, Son," he said. "No one died, and she's telling everyone you got to her just in time."

"Everyone?" I raised an eyebrow at this.

"Her friend Angela returned after supper with her boyfriend and a colleague from the bookstore," Carlisle smiled. "She has friends that care, and that's a good thing."

I nodded at this and then leaned forward in my seat.

"Carlisle, I don't know what to do," I confessed.

He gazed at me for a long time, words and suggestions flicking through his mind at breathtaking speed.

"You can only do what you think is right," he said at last.

I ducked my head under the weight of his golden-eyed compassion. I wasn't worthy of his high regard. He had no idea how many times I had contemplated spilling Bella's blood.

_Edward,_ he ventured, _what is it that you want_?

I looked up at this.

"What's your first response to that question?"

My mouth opened and closed as I considered the possibilities.

_Your first response_, he chided me in a gentle tone.

"She's mine. I have to keep her safe."

"Well then," Carlisle said with a placid smile, "you know what you have to do."

* * * * *

So I did what I had to do. I turned up on campus every day. I submitted my papers on time. I played my role to perfection.

And I watched Bella sleep every night. Each time I left her, I was already hungry for more. A part of me had hoped that my fascination would lessen over time, but if anything it seemed to increase. Simply put, I couldn't get enough of her. At least, when she was unconscious. During the day I avoided her company where possible but it was becoming increasingly difficult as she continued to actively seek me out.

Her first day back on campus after the accident had been a trial for her. I had watched from a distance as she was approached by well wishers, assuring them over and over that she was fine. Her face flushed each time the spotlight of attention was turned on her, and she laughed off any overt concern. It seemed as if she wanted to put the accident as far behind her as possible. I saw her eyes scan her vicinity, searching for someone as she told the story of her incredible survival. She was looking for me. To my surprise and relief her story never wavered; I had been standing next to her, and had pulled her out of the way. I couldn't help but wonder what had inspired her level of trust in me.

Avoiding her did nothing to ease the burn in my throat, or the longing I felt, neither of which I was going to satisfy. I had taken to running each day before going to college. It seemed easier to manage the ache in my throat when the landscape was nothing but a green blur. The running became a habit. Watching Bella was another.

I had taken to sitting in different locations at the various lectures we shared, slumping down in my seat or keeping my ipod earbuds in as if discouraging conversation with anyone. I knew she looked for me.

I loved her. I knew that now. Humans fell in an out of love with alarming ease, and yet for me it took monumental effort to even acknowledge the emotion. I kept waiting for the sensation to pass, hoping that one day I would see her and feel nothing. Instead it became more difficult every day. I pretended to ignore her, but I watched every move she made, every word she said, and every breath she took.

Student conversations that I now thought trivial and dull were now actively sought out. I hungered for them, because they revealed aspects of Bella that I was unable to find out for myself. Her mind was closed to me, and so I had to rely on the petty ramblings and clumsy flirtations of the students around her. It was infuriating to listen to their fumbling attempts to engage her in conversation when I was privy to their innermost thoughts. They smiled and asked questions, seemingly interested in what she had to say, whilst pornographic images danced in their mind's eye. Still, Bella smiled and answered, and each banal conversation gave me more snippets of information that I hoarded.

Tyler seemed to have appointed himself Bella's protector, ironic, given that it was his careless actions that nearly ended her life but for my intervention. Jessica was annoyed at this but continued to smile and seemingly welcome Bella's company while her thoughts grew more spiteful as Tyler's attentions increased.

One of the other students – Mike Newton – was another torment. He was the all-American boy; blonde hair, blue eyes and a guileless expression. It was clear that Bella was not interested in him, and yet I had to feel some gratitude to him. Of all the others, he seemed able to keep her talking. It annoyed me that I had to rely on him to uncover her secrets. He peppered her with questions; wanting to know what she had done on the weekend, asking her on dates, about her family. In return she feigned a polite interest when he rambled on about himself and smilingly declined his romantic overtures.

I watched as she declined dinner and movie invitations and each refusal was delivered with a regretful smile so that the boys were left disappointed but their self-esteem remained intact. Jessica could have learned much from her. For all that Bella continually declined, the offers kept coming. She was never mean, never cutting in her refusals, and so each one hoped that perhaps they would be the one to win her over. They seemed to regard her as a challenge to be won, and I gritted my teeth as they included her in their crude fantasies.

Mike seemed to be the one she favoured above the others. She always had a ready smile for him that made him more confident around her. He didn't notice that her smile never became anything more than polite, never reached her eyes. I had seen her smile, and new how warming it could be. I had seen her smile. I thought back to the previous night.

I had been sitting in the chair – my chair – in her bedroom, doing nothing but count her breaths. Being in the same room as her, watching over her when she was at her most vulnerable was a soothing experience for me. Her eyelashes had been fluttering. She was dreaming again, and I had wished yet again that I could see the images in her mind. In the next room, Angela was dreaming about the Easter Bunny. Bella's lashes fluttered and then stopped. Before I could move, her eyes opened. Our gazes met and she had gazed at me for a long moment, then she had smiled before her eyes closed and she drifted back into sleep.

Mike was still talking. I watched as she smiled and nodded with polite half-attention. What was she thinking now?

I shifted as my phone vibrated in my pocket and then dug it out.

_Talk to her. She wont bite. A._

I had to grin at that. No, Bella wouldn't bite, but I could. I glanced at Bella and deliberated over Alice's urging. The phone vibrated again.

_The future is all blurry again. I hope ur satisfied._

I was quite satisfied. It made sense to me. Another message came in. Alice was in quite a mood today.

_If you wont talk to her I will._

I frowned at that. Alice had been pestering me about Bella ever since the accident.

"We're going to be friends, Edward, I've _seen_ it," she had protested.

"And the future is subjective," I had countered, making her pout.

I sighed to myself. I wanted to talk to Bella as much as Alice did, but keeping a distance was what was best for Bella's safety. And mine.

The lecture concluded and instead of waiting until the hall had cleared, I made my way out of the room amongst a clump of students. I had hoped to blend in with the crowd, and was congratulating myself on my subterfuge as I exited the building when I heard someone calling my name.

Not just anyone. Bella.

"Edward," she called again. I squared off hoping she would think I hadn't heard her. Again I was wrong. "Dammit, Edward, wait up," her voice sounded exasperated now, and I could hear her breathing increase as she broke into a light jog. Her heartbeat made a delightful rhythm against the backdrop of the day.

I gave up and turned around, watching as she half jogged, half walked towards me. Her face was lit up with an open smile that faltered when she saw my closed expression. By the time she reached me her cheeks were flushed with a combination of exertion and embarrassment.

"You're a hard guy to pin down," she smiled.

"I've been busy," I replied, remembering to shift my weight and fidget as we stood facing each other.

"I just wanted to, you know-," the wind blew her hair across her face and she reached up to tuck it behind her ear, "thank you."

"For what?" I kept my tone polite.

"Saving my life," she answered as she gave me a quizzical look, "or from Tyler, which is also a fate worse than death."

Her comment nearly made me smile. If she thought Tyler was bad enough I wondered what she would make of me if she really knew. I started walking again, and Bella kept up.

"So-," she began before trailing off and raising an eyebrow at me in silent invitation.

"So?" I wasn't going to take the bait.

"Can I buy you a drink sometime? You know-," she was a little flustered now, "to say thanks?"

I looked ahead.

"You've already thanked me."

"I know, but it doesn't seem enough."

"It's fine, Bella," I replied. I could see Alice and Jasper waiting by the car in the car park ahead of us. Alice gave me a small wave and a thumbs-up too quickly for Bella to notice.

"And what if I say it isn't?" Bella was sounding challenging now.

I kept my hands in my pockets as I walked, and shot her a look of what I hoped was irritation but said nothing.

"Fine," Bella said at last, twirling some hair around her fingers as she thought. "Well then, I'll be out with a couple of friends tonight," she named the bar I had shadowed her weeks before, "so if you're in the area stop in and I'll buy you a drink."

"And if I don't?" I said.

She shrugged and slowed her pace, "Then I guess it's your loss."

"Okay then," I gave a disaffected shrug and kept walking, leaving her behind. Alice shook her head as I approached and showed me what she could see; Bella standing still, gazing after my retreating form, disappointment clear on her face.

"That was mean," Alice commented as I got to the car.

"It was necessary," I answered.

"Edward, call it what you like, but there aren't any winners from where I stand," Jasper said as he held his hand out for the car keys. I sighed and gave them to him, accepting Alice's order to sit in the back without question.

"Going out tonight?" Alice asked with elaborate casualness.

"You tell me," I grunted as I shut the car door as gently as possible. The last time I had been distracted getting into one of the cars there had been hell to pay from Rosalie afterwards.

"You will," she said, sounding pleased with herself. Jasper shot her a slight grin and reached out to take her hand as he drove. I envied them their easy intimacy with each other.

"It doesn't have to be that way, Edward," Jasper commented, no doubt picking up on my emotions.

"I think it does," I replied.

"Well you're the only one," Alice said, shooting me a look of exasperation this time. "How about you actually cut yourself some slack and go out, have a drink like she said."

"Fine," I replied at last. Alice blinked.

"Just like that?"

"You know what happened the last time she went out," I retorted. "Like I'm going to let that happen again."

"At least Lonnie's out of the picture," Jasper commented.

I gave a mirthless grin. Emmett had taken to his surveillance assignment with gusto, and I remembered his return home a few nights before.

_Emmett had burst into the house broadcasting excitement and satisfaction, his grin nearly splitting his face in half._

"_Look at you," Esme had marvelled, "what lit your fire?"_

"_Edward," Emmett had boomed expansively, "the ass-wipe has been taken care of. Sorry, Esme," he had blanched and swung back to see Esme shaking her head at his choice of phrase._

"_I don't know what I'm going to do with you boys," she said, reaching up to pat his face. _

_Emmett had grinned at her loving forgiveness and turned back to me, where I had been battling Jasper on Grand Theft Auto. Jasper paused the game and we both sat waiting for his report._

"_So what's the news on Lonnie?" I asked. I didn't need to ask, having plucked the news from his mind as soon as he entered, but Emmett wanted to tell his story._

"_Dude," he said, throwing himself onto the couch and shooting Esme another look of apology as the frame protested, "it was fantastic. He was a bar downtown, a real seedy one-,"_

_I nodded. Lonnie's choice of hangout had definitely gone downhill since our encounter. He was trying to stay off the radar, but his habits hadn't changed. Emmett had deterred him from another two victims in the past month._

"_He was really making a night of it too," Emmett continued, "or at least I thought he was. He was acting drunk right up until he saw a woman leave by herself."_

_Lonnie had been slumped at the bar nursing his drink, watching the woman walk out, and minutes later had gotten to his feet and lurched towards the door. Once clear of the bar all pretence of intoxication vanished. His walk was measured and silent as he closed the gap between himself and the woman who was making her way uptown. He watched as she fished through her handbag cursing when she realised she didn't have her phone, and had smiled to himself._

"_He thought I was just another drunk too," Emmett said, grinning with anticipation as he told the night's events. _

"_I'm not surprised, you reek like a brewery," Rosalie said, her nose wrinkling in distaste._

"_I wasn't drinking," Emmett protested, "but I poured a couple of drinks down my shirt to act the part."_

"_Nice one," Jasper grinned, and Emmett nodded at the compliment._

"_So Lonnie's getting closer to the girl," Emmett said, "which is when I cannoned into him, acting like a total drunk."_

"_And?" Alice leaned forward in her seat. She had seen the events of the evening of course, but like the rest of us was getting caught up in Emmett's infectious enthusiasm._

"_The woman heard us and took off, so Lonnie-boy got angry with me," Emmett went on, "which is when I gave him my game face."_

_Lonnie had tried to push past Emmett, who had all the flexibility of a brick wall. He stepped aside and Emmett blocked him, before grabbing his wrists and giving a gentle squeeze. Gentle for Emmett perhaps, but it was enough to force Lonnie to his knees._

"_Hey, Lonnie," Emmett had said, "I see you didn't get the message the last time one of us spoke to you."_

_Lonnie's face went the colour of dirty milk. He hadn't forgotten his encounter with me._

"_How many of you are there?" he had asked in a hoarse voice, wincing as Emmett increased his grip and hauled him to his feet. He let go of Lonnie's wrists and clasped his upper arms, lifting him up off the ground with no effort whatsoever. Lonnie squeaked as his feet scrabbled for purchase on empty air._

"_Enough," Emmett had said in a low growl, "and we're all watching you."_

_Lonnie looked at Emmett's face and gave a low moan of horror. Emmett's eyes were black, and he wasn't breathing._

"_I figured I didn't need any temptation," Emmett explained to us, grinning when Rosalie shushed away his explanation and urged him to continue the story._

_Emmett pulled Lonnie closer and smiled very slowly for maximum effect as his teeth drew closer to the whimpering man's throat._

"_So we're wondering how long it's going to take for you to get the message. I believe my colleague made it pretty clear to you last time." Emmett snapped his teeth close to Lonnie's neck for good measure. "You're nothing, Lonnie. You're garbage, so here's the situation. You can turn yourself in, or-," Emmett trailed off meaningfully._

"_O-or?" Lonnie stuttered in his fear and confusion._

"_Or I can take care of things right here." He tightened his grip again, enough for Lonnie's arms to begin to go numb from lack of circulation._

"_I'll do it," Lonnie said at last. _

"_Good to hear," Emmett said expansively._

"_Tomorrow," Lonnie went on, his eyes widening as Emmett's smile disappeared. "Tonight," he correctly hurriedly._

"_That's right. You're going to make a full confession aren't you."_

_It wasn't a question._

"_About all of them," Emmett continued, "and you're going to show them your trophies, and where you've buried the girls, all of them. I'm sure the police are going to be very interested in what you have to say for yourself."_

_All Lonnie could do at this point was nod. Emmett set him down on his feet and released his grip, making the smaller man double over in agony as the blood rushed back into his numb arms._

"_I'm not entirely sure I trust you, Lonnie, so I'm going to follow you all the way to the Police right now. Any deviation from our agreement, and you'll be seeing us again, and it will be for the last time."_

_Lonnie hadn't been able to make eye contact. He knew his hunting days were over._

_By the time Emmett finished his story Alice was applauding, and Jasper gave him a high five. I shook his hand._

"_Thanks, Em," I said, "I think you had a lot more fun with it than I would've."_

"_Only because you take everything so seriously," he retorted._

_Rosalie was gazing at him with adoration. His good mood was infectious but for now I could see that Rosalie had other things in mind. Emmett looked at her and caught on fast._

"_And now, if you'll excuse us," he said, taking Rosalie by the hand and leading her towards the door, "the evening has been quite exciting and I need to hunt."_

"_And that's not all," Rosalie had murmured._

_The pair of them had stopped outside for a passionate kiss before disappearing at high speed into the forest._

"_Well, at least they'll be celebrating away from the house," Esme sighed._

_We all nodded in agreement. All the soundproofing in the world was nothing compared to vampire hearing._

"Even with Lonnie gone, there are still plenty of other threats out there," I commented.

"All the more reason for you to go," Alice said. "Edward, just relax, you've have a good time."

For a moment her control slipped, and I caught a brief glimpse of Bella smiling and waving me over before the shields dropped shut once more.

_No cheating, Edward._ Alice thought, and then she caught my eye in the rear view mirror and grinned.

* * * * *

It was the same bar as last time, with mostly the same faces. I hesitated in the doorway and then stepped inside moving my way through the crowd. I had caught Bella's scent in the air immediately, her sweetness cutting through the smell of stale beer and greasy food. She was standing at the bar getting herself a drink when she turned her head and saw me. Her face lit up with a smile, and I gloried in it when I realised her smile was for me.

I reached the bar as her drink order was delivered, and I ordered a bottle of water.

"Not drinking?" she asked.

"Driving," I offered.

She sipped her drink and gave me a challenging stare. "So, are you talking to me now?"

I wasn't sure how to answer that.

"Not really," I said.

She closed her eyes and sipped at her drink again. There was a small line in between her eyebrows, the kind that Esme called the 'I want' line, and my fingers itched to be able to reach up and smooth it away.

"So you're not really talking to me, but you show up at the bar when I invite you out anyway. What is it that you want, Edward?"

I liked the sound of my name on her lips. Perhaps I could be a little kinder to her. There was no reason to lie, but I could be economical with the truth. I had managed to earn her trust, and I didn't want to throw that away.

"I'm sorry," I began, "I know I'm being rude, but I just think it's better this way."

She regarded me over the rim of her glass and then licked a droplet of Coke off her lip.

"I'm not sure I follow what you mean."

Was she being deliberate obtuse? She was an intelligent woman and I was making myself clear.

"It's better if we're not friends." That was the best warning I could offer. Surely she could pick up the message. "Trust me."

She set her drink down on the bar with a sigh and then turned back to me, her eyes tight. She was getting angry.

"I guess it's too bad you didn't figure this out sooner and save yourself the trouble."

"What trouble?" Now I was the one getting confused. I was the threat, not her.

"You know," she went on, warming to her theme, "if you don't like me you could have just let Tyler's truck hit me and be done with it."

I stared at her, dumbstruck. That she could think I regretted saving her life stunned me. Saving her had been one of the few things in my existence that I was not ashamed of. Knowing she was in the world provided me with a reason for my existence. It had been all I could do to keep her alive ever since I had detected her scent.

"You think I regret that?"

She shrugged. "It's starting to look that way." Sipping at her drink again she gave me a challenging look and then stared down at the bar. Her face was flushed, and I wondered how many drinks she had already consumed, this belligerent side of hers was quite unexpected. Her scent had the faintest trace of wood smoke and I had my answer; she had been drinking bourbon before I arrived.

My phone vibrated in my pocket and I took it out to see a message from Alice.

_Danger! A_

I was about to say something to Bella when my head snapped to the side as I caught an entirely unexpected scent, one that I hadn't come across before.

Vampire.

* * * * *

I swept the bar and found it or rather, him. He was leaning against the rear wall scoping the crowd. Our eyes met and he gave me a lazy nod of acknowledgement, from one hunter to another. He pushed himself away from the wall and made his way across the room, walking with a careless grace, closing his eyes in appreciation as a particularly appealing scent came his way. I didn't want him anywhere near Bella and I stepped away from her without a word and walked towards him.

"My apologies," he drawled, "I'll hunt elsewhere."

"I'd appreciate it if you did," I replied, trying to hide my distaste. The man was a nomad and his mind was utterly repellent. He didn't just enjoy his existence; he gloried in it. His mind was filled with the hunt, the dying gurgles of his victims, the warmth of their pulsing blood-

I broke away from his mind and shook my head in effort to clear it.

"I'm James," he said by way of introduction and raised his eyebrow expecting me to reciprocate.

I said nothing.

"I see," he said with a slight smile, "then I've intruded on your fun. I'll leave, but I'm sure we'll meet again."

His gaze flickered over my shoulder and his smile grew as he gazed at Bella. "Quite sure," he repeated. Seen through his eyes she was even more tempting. Her face was flushed and she was watching our conversation with interest, her heartbeat a steady rhythm over the din of the room.

"Enough," I growled and took a step closer.

James gave a short laugh and stepped away. I glanced over my shoulder to see Bella regarding me with curiosity, and when I looked back he had gone.

* * * * *

I returned to where she was waiting at the bar and took a deep breath of her scent to calm myself. I could still feel the growl rumbling in my chest, an instinctive reaction to the threat.

"Edward?" she reached out to touch my sleeve. "Are you okay?

"I'm fine," I gritted.

"That guy," she began, "do you know him?"

"Not really," I admitted. Nor did I want to. I'd dealt with his kind – my kind – enough in the past without wanting to revisit it now.

"Friend?"

I gave her a sharp look. "Definitely not." Not friend, foe.

"Good," she said simply, and in response to my gaze she went on, "he gave me the creeps is all."

I said nothing, but watched her finish her drink.

"Are you here with friends tonight?" I said at last.

She set her empty glass down and gave me an exasperated look. "I thought I was, but you soon set me straight on that one."

"You came here alone?" I was stunned at the magnitude of her lack of self-preservation. "How did you get here?"

"I walked," she shrugged.

"You walked?"

"What are you, an echo? Of course I walked, it's only a few blocks from home."

"All the same, it's not safe," I protested. I thought humans were enough of a threat but the arrival of James created a different situation entirely.

"Don't worry, Edward, I'll go home now," she said and pushed herself away from the bar, patting her pockets to check for keys and change.

"You'll catch a cab?" I asked as I turned to follow.

"I'll walk," she said carelessly, tossing her hair over her shoulders. "Relax, I've done it plenty of times before."

I nearly groaned at that. The woman was a danger magnet and she had no idea.

"Fine," I said, taking her arm. "I'll walk you home."

"I don't want to inconvenience you," Bella said in a dry tone as she twisted free, stepping aside as some more people entered the bar, and then slipping outside as soon as the coast was clear.

"It's not an inconvenience," I sighed, shoving my hands into my pockets and matching her pace. "I just want to make sure you're safe."

"So let me get this straight, you saved my life but don't want to talk to me. I invite you out for a drink and you say no but then you show up anyway, you don't really want to talk to me, but then you insist on walking me home. Does that sound about right to you?"

She had a point. I was contradicting myself at every turn and it was all because of her.

"I'm just saying that you and I shouldn't be friends."

"You left it a little late to be springing that on me," Bella commented as we walked on. "So, Edward, what made you decide to break your rules and talk to me now?"

"Bella," I sighed, "I'm trying to tell you that we shouldn't-,"

"Well consider the question a hypothetical one then."

I gave her a sceptical look, and she nodded for me to continue. "Hypothetically, I guess I get lonely sometimes."

"Yeah, I'm beginning to see why."

We walked on in silence. I could feel Bella's gaze on me from time to time, and she occasionally opened her mouth to say something before thinking better of it. I could have screamed at the frustration of not knowing that was going on in that infuriating head of hers. By the time we reached Bella's apartment the air was thick when tension between us.

Bella cleared her throat. "So, um. Yeah, this is my place," she said in a rush and then looked at me. "Are _you_ going to be safe enough to walk home by yourself?"

I smiled, careful not to show too much of my teeth. "I can look after myself."

She suppressed a smile at that, and yet again I wondered what she was thinking.

"Fine," she said at last as she turned to climb the stairs to the front door. "Well thank you for the escort. I'll see you on campus sometime."

"Sure," I said automatically.

"That is," she turned, "if you're going to talk to me."

I shook my head at her. "We'll see."

She huffed a little at that then turned to go inside without saying another word.

The door latched closed behind her and I turned at the sound of slow applause from across the street. I crossed the road to see James leaning against a parked car.

"Nice," he commented as I drew near, "I have to say that's a new way of hunting I haven't considered before. Be nice, win them over and then-," he licked his lips in anticipation.

A growl ripped from my throat before I could stop myself.

_Mine_.

His grin broadened with anticipation but I worked to get myself back under control.

"My family," I began, clenching my jaw, "maintains a permanent resident nearby. We work hard not to draw attention to ourselves, and I'd appreciate it if you extended us the same courtesy."

"But of course," James swept me a courtly bow with a practised leg, a gesture that hinted at his age, jeans and leather jacket notwithstanding. "I shall withdraw."

I gave him a curt nod.

"But surely you will understand," he went on, "that my mate and I will need to feed soon. We'll endeavour not to-," he paused for effect, "inconvenience you."

He inclined his head again in apparent good humour before turning and walking away at human speed. I looked up at Bella's apartment and saw her bedroom light flicker to life. I stepped back into the shadows and settled back to wait for her to go to sleep.

Now the danger to Bella was stronger than ever.

**A/N: Yep, the writer's block has well and truly been broken! I'll be getting onto the next chapter of Take the Cake next.**

**Hope you liked this instalment, there will be more to follow soon. Can you tell I've got a university paper due soon? Hee hee**

**Anyway, you like? Reviews = love, and Edward watching over you as you sleep.**


	9. Chapter 9

_Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer, I'm just producing a cheap imitation for my own pleasure …_

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry this chapter has been so long in the making. Things got VERY busy with work and university commitments, and then of course I was churning out some chapters of **_**Take the Cake**_** as well. It wasn't until I sat down and started writing this chapter that I realised just how much I had missed Vampward *sigh* so I've learned my lesson.**

**Um, just bear in mind that this is unbeta'd, unchecked, and in first draft form. I'm just mucking around with this one, but I hope you like it.**

**Songlines Ch9**

I stood in the shadows for what felt like a long time. I was counting the minutes until I knew Bella would be in bed asleep. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I got it out already knowing it would be Alice.

_Go watch your girl. A x_

Despite the gravity of the situation I had to smile at Alice's impish comment. If she saw anything untoward she would alert me. The hour was late; most humans in the vicinity would be asleep or close to it. Decision made I scaled the side of the house in quick time and a brief hesitation, eased myself into Bella's bedroom.

She was asleep on her stomach clutching her pillow with her hair obscuring her face. I found myself standing by her bedside, my hands clenching and unclenching as I fought against the instinct to reach out and smooth her hair away to give me an unobstructed view. She was smiling a little in her sleep and I marvelled that she could sleep so sweetly despite the danger that surrounded her. It seemed that she truly had no idea what lurked in the world just beyond her awareness. I took a seat in my chair and watched her as the hours passed. Bella shifted in her sleep a few times but tonight was one of the rare evenings that she didn't speak. By the time I eased my way out of her window the sky was beginning to lighten. As I made my way back to where I had parked the car my senses were on full alert.

I had to give James credit; he was very good. He'd managed to trail us without his scent alerting me, and my own distraction in the woman walking at my side had somehow kept his thoughts quiet until he was ready to reveal himself. He had made no comment on the colour of my eyes but his thoughts as he had left told me that he was intent on finding out what the situation was. I cursed myself for mentioning the family but it was too late now.

When I arrived back home I could see Alice sitting on the front steps waiting for me. She was still shielding her thoughts from me but her expression was one of deep concern. Parking the car in the garage I walked towards the house and sat down on the steps beside her.

"Hey," I greeted as I leaned over and nudged her with my shoulder.

"I should have seen him sooner," Alice looked woebegone, "but I wasn't looking. I wanted to give you some privacy."

"It was okay," I shrugged off her concern, "I saw him off at the bar but I don't think that will be the last we see of him." I thought back to the glimpse into his mind that I had caught earlier. "My concern is Bella."

"As it should be," Alice agreed, "she's caught his interest."

"Mmm," I kept my voice non-committal. If James had even a fraction of the interest in Bella that I had, she would be dead already.

"Not her scent," Alice went on as she glanced at me, "it's you."

"Me?" I cocked an eyebrow at this.

Alice gave a sad smile. "I think so."

I frowned as I considered this.

"We're different, _you're_ different," Alice pointed out, "and he noticed the way you watched Bella."

Alice nudged me with her shoulder. "Carlisle is waiting," she urged.

"I'm sure he is," I sighed.

The front door opened and Jasper appeared. He gave me a small nod as he crossed to where Alice was sitting and stood behind her. She leaned against his legs and smiled up at him.

"Want to go for a run?" he asked her, and then looked at me. "Sorry," he gestured at the small woman sitting at his feet, "she's been sitting out here most of the night, I thought I could-,"

"Go," I waved a hand, "I'll see you when you get back."

"I'll keep watching," Alice promised, "if I see anything we'll come straight back."

"Come on, baby," Jasper said as he took her hand and lead her down the steps.

I watched them disappear into the woods that surrounded the house and then went inside.

Rosalie and Emmett were nowhere to be seen and I could hear Esme moving around in the bedroom upstairs.

_I'm in my study_, _Edward_. Carlisle's thought drew me up the stairs and hesitating at the wooden door. _Come on in, Son._

Carlisle was sitting at his desk finishing some paperwork from the hospital and he looked up and gave me a smile as he nodded towards one of the chairs.

"It sounds like you've had an interesting night," Carlisle said as he set his pen aside and regarded me with a calm expression.

"Not that interesting," I replied with caution, "although we may have to keep watch over the next few days."

"Who was he, anyone we know?" Carlisle asked.

"No, I've never seen him before, he-," I broke off as I considered James's appearance. "He's a nomad travelling with his mate." I sighed at this and rubbed my chin, feeling restless. I wanted to watch over Bella every chance that I could. I told Carlisle every detail of our encounter; the way James was dressed, his behaviour, his thoughts. When I finished Carlisle's forehead bore a slight frown as he considered the situation.

"They'll be hunting nearby?" he asked.

"I told him we have a residence here so with luck they won't cause any trouble," I reminded Carlisle.

"You did," Carlisle nodded, "how curious was he about that?"

I considered the encounter and shrugged. "I think it's safe to say he'll come looking, but I don't know if he'll approach us outright." I frowned again. "There was something-," I stopped as I recalled the sparse thoughts I had been able to detect.

"What?"

"He's good," I gave Carlisle a chagrined smile, "I couldn't read him clearly.

Carlisle's eyebrows went up at this.

"That's … unusual," he conceded.

"Tell me about it," I grunted. Bella was frustration enough without posing a threat, but James presented a new factor into the family's safety equation.

"And Bella?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose at this and sighed again.

"He saw us together and followed us back to her apartment. He's definitely curious but beyond that I don't know what he wants. If he's going to try something we're going to need Alice on this."

By the time I left Carlisle's study the sky was lighter. It was going to be another grey day, a fact I regretted now that I knew it meant James could roam around unhindered. I went to my room and closed the door, registering that my clothes carried the scents of the bar as well as Bella's room. I made my way into the bathroom for a shower and after some perfunctory ablutions I changed into some fresh clothes.

_Take your time, she's running late this morning_. Alice advised, making me alter my course towards the garage and out into the forest instead. _See you when you get back_, Alice sent again and then left me alone. I disappeared into the undergrowth and began to run. A hunt would do me good.

The burn in my throat had lessened somewhat by the time I arrived on campus. Alice and Jasper had set off ahead of me, Alice citing a study group commitment that I hadn't heard of before. When I had raised an eyebrow in Jasper's direction at this he had simply shrugged and gone back to his reading, flicking through the pages in a blur of speed, snorting at all the historical inaccuracies as he went. Alice had studiously ignored my curiosity as she had taken Jasper by the hand to pull him up out of his seat and propel him outside towards the car.

I made my way across campus scanning everyone I passed. My lecture wasn't due to start for another hour but I had been unable to stay away any longer; I needed to see Bella. I was almost at the bookstore when I saw something that halted me in my tracks; Alice and Bella, sitting at one of the café tables smiling and talking.

"Easy there," a voice behind me advised. I turned to see Jasper strolling towards me, his satchel slung across his chest and hands in pockets. "Nothing to worry about."

"What's going on?" I snapped. Alice had assured me she would keep her distance _until the time was right_. I frowned as I recalled her exact words and realised she could be more cunning than I had previously thought. Jasper offered a half smile as he monitored my reaction.

"I'm sure she has her reasons," Jasper went on. A wave of calm swept over me as he drew near and he put a companionable hand on my shoulder as he matched my pace. "Besides, don't they look happy?" he nodded his head towards the two women.

I had to concede that Jasper had a point. Bella looked relaxed and happy as she listened to Alice speak, sipping at a cup of coffee. Alice had a cup of coffee by her elbow and I wondered how she was going to dispose of the contents without Bella noticing. At that moment Bella looked up in answer to a greeting and Alice tipped some of the contents on to the ground at her feet, returning the tup to the table too quickly for human eyes to notice.

Bella noticed our approach and her face lit up with a smile of recognition. I could hear her heart rate accelerate and marvelled that I could be the cause of it. Jasper chucked under his breath beside me and I made an effort to try to keep my emotions to myself.

"Thanks, Man," Jasper muttered, "it's hard enough with Em and Rose without you getting all-," he stopped speaking as Alice greeted us.

"Here's my boys," Alice crowed.

I managed not to wince at her analogy. At 111 years of age I was hardly a boy for all that I was trapped in the body of a 22 year old, and Jasper was older still.

"Hey," she gave me a warm smile and then looked at Alice in puzzlement, "you guys know each other?"

"We're related," Alice replied just as Jasper leaned down to give her a quick kiss. "Not _us,_" she corrected smoothly as she smiled at Jasper before giving her attention to Bella again. "Jasper and I are together, Edward's my brother."

"Oh," comprehension dawned on Bella's face, shadowed with a touch of relief at her earlier confusion.

"May I?" I indicated the vacant seat beside her.

"Please," she nodded with a smile. There was a hint of blush staining her cheeks now as I sat down beside her. "By the way, thanks for seeing me home last night."

"Oh so you're the one," Alice nodded in faux acknowledgement.

I shot a look at Jasper who gave me a baffled shrug. He had no idea what his mate was up to either and so it seemed all we could do was play along.

"I'm the one what?" Bella said as she swirled her coffee cup and sipped at it again.

"Edward's mystery date last night," Alice said and then leaned forward and went on in a confidential tone, "he tends to keep to himself a lot."

"You picked up on that too, huh?" Bella said with a dry smile and then gave me a wink.

"Darlin'," Jasper interrupted as he reached out and rubbed Alice's back, "don't tease."

"Sorry," Alice offered with an impish grin that indicated she wasn't sorry at all. "But the opportunity was just too good to resist."

"Sure," I replied in a droll tone. I wondered how close I could get to Bella, perhaps if I-

_Do it_. Alice urged.

I settled myself more comfortably in the chair and then rested my arm along the back of Bella's chair. She shivered a little at the contact but before I could wonder if it was in reaction to my lack of warmth she leaned back in her chair enough to feel my arm against my back. It was a small gesture but that one spoke of silent acceptance.

"I didn't know that you knew Bella," I said, raising an eyebrow at Alice who didn't even have the grace to blink as I called her to account.

"We just got talking while I was getting a coffee," Bella explained, "and then decided to share a table."

"Ah," I nodded.

"Small world, huh?" Alice smiled.

"Very," I agreed.

I felt a surge of amusement and knew from a flicker of his eyelid that it came from Jasper. The four of us were sitting exchanging polite small talk with only one of the group having no idea what the subtext was.

"So, Jasper," Bella was saying, "what are you studying?"

"History," Jasper smiled.

"Any particular specialty?" Bella asked.

"Oh here we go," Alice sighed in mock despair, squealing as Jasper tickled her side.

"Civil War," he replied, "ignore her, she's not one for hitting the books like I am."

"We all have our passions," Bella laughed, "Alice has already told me that hers is fashion." She turned to me, "and you're studying-," she gave me an expectant look.

"Literature and communications," I said at last, watching as Bella tried not to laugh.

"Communications," she commented and then pursed her lips. "Interesting."

I shrugged off her amusement, "it's something to do until-," I broke off realising that I had almost said too much, and then glanced at Bella as she gave me an understanding smile.

"Until you know what you want?"

"Something like that," I agreed.

I already knew what I want. For the first time in my overlong existence I could name my desire with perfect clarity, and it was sitting right beside me.

* * * * *

Today was one of days when Bella and I did not sure a lecture and I found myself wanting to stretch out our conversation as long as possible. Even Jasper seemed to be enjoying himself, or at least he seemed to give all the impression of a man taking his ease. He watched Alice talk with an indulgent smile, and contributed the occasional comment in response to questions from Bella.

I marvelled that Bella could seem so comfortable with us when most humans seemed to shy away for any sort of contact. What would she do if she were to find out she was sitting with three vampires? For all that we maintained a 'vegetarian' lifestyle the lure of human blood would always remain. I glanced at Jasper to see if he had anything to do with Bella's relaxed state and felt oddly reassured when I gave me a slight shake of his head in response. She felt perfectly comfortable with us without any outside influences. Remarkable.

At last Jasper checked his watch and then glanced at Alice.

"Babe," he began.

"I know, your lecture," Alice answered, "have fun."

"Right," Jasper said with a sly grin. It was a particular pleasure of his to question and correct the academic text much to the consternation of his lecturers.

"How about you, Bella?" Alice turned back to the woman beside me, "have you got a lecture soon?"

Bella shrugged and set down her now empty cup. "I had one this morning, and I'm working at the bookstore in-," she consulted her watch, "ten minutes."

"Hmm," Alice pursed her lips thoughtfully, "maybe we should catch up again soon."

"I'd like that," Bella smiled, "you guys are easy to be with."

I managed to keep my expression carefully blank at this, although the woman seemed determined to surprise me at every turn.

"Really?" Alice was beaming, "Then consider it done."

"Great," Bella pulled her bag onto her lap and began to dig through it. Without any prompting, Alice produced a paper and pen.

"Is this what you were after?" she offered with an artless smile.

"Thanks," Bella accepted them and scribbled down her cell number before sliding it back, "can I have yours too?"

"Sure," Alice wrote quickly and then tore the paper in half, offering Bella the number.

"Wouldn't it be easier to program your numbers into each other's phones?" Jasper had watched the exchange with a bemused expression.

"Yup," Bella agreed, "but my phone's dead," she stashed the scrap of paper in her bag and held up the small black handset by way of explanation.

"I hope you're going to charge that," I offered, "you'd be safer if you had a working phone with you."

"Here he goes again," Bella sighed to Alice, "he seems to be a stickler for my safety."

"That's our Edward," Alice winked at me and then gave a well-feigned start of surprise. "Wait, I'm having a revelation here, would you be the girl that-,"

"Edward saved from getting crushed by a truck? Yeah, that's me," Bella gave me a slight grimace. "I thought the fuss over that had died down."

"Oh it has," Alice assured her, "Edward told us about it but I've only just put two and two together." She shook her head in apparent wonder. Oh she was _good_.

"Well," Bella gave me a playful nudge, "it seems that Edward here has appointed himself my personal protector. I tried to buy him a drink last night and then he insisted on seeing me home."

"You know the saying," Jasper chimed in smoothly, "save someone's life and then you're responsible for them."

"Yeah, right," Bella scoffed, "I'm quite capable of looking after myself.

"Ice slicks and trucks excepting," I added.

"Mmmph," Bella tried to hide her smile, "okay then smart guy."

She settled the strap of her bag over her shoulder and stood up. I rose to stand beside her and leaned close.

"Seeing as I'm so responsible might I have the honour of escorting you to work?" I breathed into her ear.

"S-sure," she replied before turning to face Alice and Jasper. "It'd be great to see you guys again, give me a call sometime, Alice."

"Oh you know it," Alice grinned, "later peeps," she added and taking Jasper's hand they set off.

Bella watched them go and then looked at me. "I like her, she's so-," she waved a hand.

"Talkative?" I suggested.

"She is," Bella agreed, "but in a nice way." She shot me a sidelong look as we began to walk. "Are you _sure_ you're related?"

"Quite sure," I replied, wishing I could take Bella's hand. She took care of my internal dilemma by slipping her arm through mine as we walked.

"Hope you don't mind," she ventured after a moment of silence while we walked.

"Mind what?"

She indicated her arm through mine with a nod of her head.

"Not at all," I replied, "in fact I'm flattered."

"Good," she replied, "plus of course, the ground is still kinda icy so-,"

"Ahh," I nodded, "so you're using me for a bit of support."

"Something like that," she agreed.

We kept walking and exchanging small talk. I couldn't help but notice how the top of her head barely cleared my shoulder. For someone so tiny, so diminutive, she loomed in my awareness like a colossus. Alas we reached the store all too soon and she removed her arm from mine with a slight smile of regret.

"You'll charge your phone?" I prompted her, unable to let her go just yet.

"Yes, Boss," she gave a mock salute and then patted my arm with a laugh. "I don't know why you have to worry so much, Edward, I'm fine."

"Trust me, after seeing that truck bearing down safe is not a word that leaps to mind when I think of you."

"Oh," she flushed and looked oddly pleased, "and do you think of me often?"

"More than you'd think," I admitted in a low voice as I stepped closer, "I feel very … protective of you."

"I'd noticed," she replied in a dry voice, "but it's appreciated," she added in a quiet voice. "It's nice to know I've got someone watching out for me, even if they do drive me nuts."

"Noted," I offered a crooked smile and watched as she bit her bottom lip. "Have a good day and please, _try_ to be safe." I paused and then moved with deliberate slowness to brush the back of my fingers along her cheek. She felt so warm and smooth, so _alive_.

As I removed my hand Bella's eyes were wide as she watched me. Her heart rate had given an unsteady lurch when my cool hand had come into contact with her skin.

"I'll see what I can do," she managed after catching her breath. And with that she disappeared into the store.

I hesitated outside for a moment and then resigned myself to adhering to the established charade and turned to go to my lecture. It was only for a couple of hours, surely nothing could happen on campus.

As it turned out, I couldn't have been more wrong.

* * * * *

The afternoon had progressed at a frustratingly slow pace. I was suffering through another interminable lecture when Alice's voice flashed into my mind.

_Edward, the store – Bella_.

I stiffened in my seat as Alice's vision flooded into my mind.

Bella rounding one of the display stands in the store and colliding with someone's chest; someone who caught her and held her at arm's length as he laughed and regarded her with cold eyes.

James.

Air hissed through my teeth as a low growl built in my chest. It was barely audible but still enough to make the boy sitting two rows in front of me look nervously over his shoulder and slid down in his seat to make himself less visible. I clenched my hands, barely registering that the pencil in my hand was being crumbled to sawdust. I pinched the larger pieces between two fingers, rubbing the remnants into a fine dust that I swept off the armrest of my chair.

James was here and for the moment there was nothing I could do.

_I can't see what he's doing_, Alice sent again, _He's hiding from me, I don't know how._

Alice's visions were subjective. I considered the possibilities. Perhaps she couldn't see James because he hadn't yet decided what he was going to do. Perhaps he had a special ability of his own, something that could hide him from our kind. I frowned at this. There had been nothing in his mind that I had been able to sense beyond his extraordinary tracking skills, but that wasn't to say any extra capabilities weren't there.

I stared at the clock on the wall just above the lecturer's head. He caught my gaze and tugged at his shirt neck as he talked. No doubt my gaze was making him anxious. The next thirty minutes were going to be excruciating.

_I'm still looking_, Alice advised, _and Jasper will be there soon._

* * * * *

The lecture finished and I was up and out of my seat while the lecturer was finishing his concluding comments. I made my way down the aisle stairs, aware that my haste was raising eyebrows but uncaring. Moving at human speed was frustrating at the best of times and I chaffed as I forced myself to move at an acceptable pace down the corridor and out into the main hallway.

_It's okay, Edward, Bella's okay_, Alice's tone was reassuring now. _Jasper's there, I'm on my way too._

I made my way across campus and got to the store to see Jasper casually leaning against a pillar. Only the constant flicking of his gaze across his surroundings betrayed him, and it wasn't something the average human would notice. He was projecting feelings of peace towards me and I shook my head as if a mosquito was annoying me.

_Sorry, man_, he offered, _it's for your own good. You look ready to take someone's head off._

"You have no idea," I muttered under my breath as I drew closer.

Jasper's lips quirked at this but he said nothing more.

"Anything?" I said as I drew near.

"You tell me," he shrugged. "I can't see anyone different here, you're the one that has his scent."

I stood clenching and unclenching my fists.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

"I'll have to go inside," I said at last, "I have to see."

"I'll be here," Jasper nodded and then smiled over my shoulder. Alice appeared at my side and gave my arm a reassuring squeeze.

"She's okay, Edward," she said, "but go check."

"I thought you just said she was okay?" Jasper queried as he pulled her towards him for a quick kiss.

"She is," Alice replied as her gaze turned inward, "but it's so hard to know for sure." She was fretting now. "Please, Edward, go make sure."

"This is getting complicated," Jasper observed.

I turned without another word and made my way into the store.

As soon as I stepped inside I knew. My nostrils flared as his scent flooded my senses. He had been here, near Bella. _My_ Bella. My chest vibrated with a subterranean growl as the threat to Bella washed over me. I followed the trail, wanting to know precisely where he had been.

Bella was busy with customers and hadn't seen me yet. Good. I prowled around the store, tracking him. He had covered most of the store but his scent pooled in one particular spot and it was mingled with Bella's. He had seen her, _touched_ her. I stood there taking deep breaths, taking his scent deeper in to me so that there would be no mistaking it in future.

"Is it him?" Jasper appeared at my side and at my nod tasted the air. Jasper stood thinking for a moment and then looked at me. "I don't know him," he said at last, "he's someone new." Jasper had a remarkable faculty for remembering scents, a skill that had been invaluable in our more nomadic years.

"Will you be able to remember?" I asked.

"Yeah," Jasper gave a slow, confident nod. "I'll know what to look for now." He gave me an apologetic look, "sorry I wasn't able to help earlier."

_She's coming_. Alice sent.

I glanced at Jasper. "Bella's on her way over."

"That's my cue to get out of here," Jasper replied and turned to stroll out of the store, giving every indication that he had not a care in the world.

"Edward?"

I turned at her call and saw Bella walking towards me.

"Hey," she smiled, "so you're keeping an eye on me at work now?"

I forced my lips to curl up into a smile. "You'd think so, but this _is_ the only bookstore on campus."

"True," she nodded, "gotta love that monopoly. What are you after?"

"Something Alice wanted me to pick up, but I should have written it down," I ventured after a careful pause.

"Oh darn," Bella said, "looks like you'll just have to come back then, huh?"

"Looks like," I agreed, my smile more genuine this time.

Bella looked up at me, her expression open and happy; she really had no idea of the danger she was in, and found myself envying her naivety. As she spoke she had shifted a little closer to me and I caught the scent of James on her clothes. For a moment my throat closed with rage.

"Busy day?" I ventured when I was able to speak.

"Not really," Bella shrugged. She glanced to the shelf beside her and absently shifted a couple of books back into their correct order, running her fingers along the spines as she thought. "I had-," she paused and bit her lip.

"What?"

She shook her head. "It's nothing, you'll think I'm being silly."

"Now you have to tell me," I pressed, "I'm curious."

Bella shifted her weight from one foot to the other as she thought, and then with a slight sigh she turned to me.

"There was this guy," she said with considerable reluctance, "we bumped into each other and," she broke off again and shrugged.

"And what?" I kept my tone as encouraging as possible.

"It's probably nothing," she insisted, "but he looked kinda familiar," she gave her words some thought, "and kinda creepy," she concluded.

I considered her words. She had obviously paid more attention to my conversation with James in the bar last night than I had given her credit for.

"Are you okay?" I wanted to take her in my arms and get her out of there. Instead I had to stand by her side and make polite conversation. I had to act human, but however much it frustrated me I could follow the charade for Bella's sake.

"I'm fine," she looked surprised, "it was just a bit weird." She gave a short laugh. "Maybe your protective streak is rubbing off on me."

"Maybe." I could only hope.

"So," Bella turned away as someone called her name, "I'd better get back to work. Good luck remembering what you came for," she said, "maybe I'll see you again sometime."

"You can count on it," I assured her, and watched her smile.

* * * * *

I left the store and began walking towards the car park where I knew Alice and Jasper would be waiting.

"See anything?" I asked Alice as we reached the car.

Alice glanced at me and was about to speak when she checked herself.

_He's here_, she thought to me_. _She gazed around the car park; at the arriving cars and groups of students milling around and making their way to class. She shook her head and looked at me, her eyes a little wild. _Edward, he's here but I can't see where. It's all blurry. He's watching us but that's all I can see._

I stopped still at this and scanned the surrounding area, lifting my head to sniff the breeze. There was perhaps the faintest trace of him on the wind but it was gone before I could follow it. I gritted my teeth and took an involuntary step back towards the direction of the store before Alice distracted me.

_You're no good to us like this, Edward_. Alice's voice stopped me and I glanced back at her. _What are you going to do? Lurk outside the store until Bella gets the creeps?_

Jasper glanced at us both and silently held his hands out for the car keys. I flicked them at him, which he caught in mid-air and unlocked the car so that he could sling his and Alice's bags onto the back seat. Alice kept up a steady stream of silent conversation with me all the while.

_I've never seen you like this, _she admitted, _but if there's anything I can do to hel p..._

I gave her a long stare and she sighed as her gaze turned inward once more.

_She's … fine,_ Alice ventured at last, _but she's flickering in and out, I can't be sure because there are so many variables._ Alice frowned and then looked up at me in sudden realisation. _But _you're _a constant in her life now._ Alice looked again and I saw her shoulders slump a little in relief. Her reaction puzzled me. Was she becoming so attached to Bella already? I wondered what this meant for the long term. _She'll be okay I think, but you need to stay close for your own peace of mind as well as ours._

* * * * *

So I stayed close, meeting Bella on campus, talking to her between lectures and tutorials, sitting with her at the café when she and Alice were enjoying themselves. Alice and Bella seemed to be forming a genuine friendship that both women seemed to delight in. I couldn't find it in myself to begrudge Alice her moments of almost-human normalcy. Watching her laugh as Bella teased her was the happiest I had seen her in a long time.

The days progressed at a grindingly slow pace, and only the evenings brought me some measure of relief. That was when I could watch over Bella to my heart's content. Her sleep talking was intermittent and seemed to occur on the nights when I arrived later than usual. On one occasion Jasper had called me out to hunt, thinking that he had found a trace of James's scent. We had tracked him to the best of our abilities for hours and had finally lost him two counties away. By the time I had arrived at Bella's room there were only two hours at best before dawn.

As I had silently entered her room I could see that she had been having a restless night. For all that the weather was cool she had kicked off her covers, her hands fisting the pillow as she frowned and mumbled under her breath. Unable to resist, I had leaned over her for a moment hoping to catch her words.

"Can't see you," she had said at last, her breathing short and choppy.

"I'm here," I whispered back, "I'm right here."

At those words Bella had subsided a little, her breathing smoothing out. I had remained leaning over her for a moment more, watching as her eyes fluttered open at me for the barest instant before drifting closed again. I looked closely at her face and saw moisture glistening around her eyes. Tears? Surely not, but I resolved never to be late again. Bella didn't cry again that week.

Of James, there was no sign.

Emmett and Rosalie had been monitoring the police reports and radio bands, and Carlisle had been vigilant in monitoring any blood related injuries that arrived at the hospital. There was nothing to arouse our suspicions, and slowly I started to entertain the faint hope that James had lost interest and left the area.

Two days later some hikers found the bodies of two campers, mauled beyond all recognition and already in an advanced state of decomposition. The general consensus was that wild animals had attacked the campers; but my family knew better. James and his mate were still here.

* * * * *

"Hey," Bella smiled and waved me over to where she was sitting. The mornings were cool and so she was sitting at an inside table at the café. She was a creature of habit; I knew her routine by heart now.

"No Angela this morning?" I asked as sat down.

"No, she stayed at Ben's last night."

"Really?" I was surprised. Angela hadn't returned home while I was there, but she had made the occasional early morning arrival from a late night at her boyfriend's.

"It's getting pretty serious," Bella gave a rueful smile, "I think I'll either have to see if I can cover the rent myself or get another roomie."

I hadn't considered the idea of Bella living alone.

"Are you okay?" Bella was eyeing me in concern and I realised I had been quiet for a fraction too long.

"Sure," I attempted a smile but she wasn't convinced, "Why?"

"You look tired," Bella indicated the shadows beneath my eyes.

It had been a few days since I had hunted. For Bella to notice a small detail like that meant that she was paying more attention than I was giving her credit for.

"I'll be fine," I tried to shrug off her concern, but she wasn't having it.

"You need to look after yourself," she insisted, reaching out to cover my hand with her own, heedless of the chill of my skin.

I watched as the pulse in her wrist jumped in time to the steady beat of her heart and muted drumming that I found myself matching my breathing to, for all that I had no need for air. It was one of the most soothing sounds I had ever heard.

"Have you got a busy day?" Bella asked as her fingers drew idle patterns on the back of my hand. I don't think she was even aware of what she was doing, but I luxuriated in the warmth of her touch.

"Not really," I shrugged, "couple of lectures, maybe some study time at the library but that's about it."

"Half your luck," Bella pulled a face.

"Why, what have you got on for today?"

"I'm working a half day shift at the store," Bella replied, "then I've got three lectures this afternoon." She wrinkled her nose at me in mock despair, "And if I'm lucky I'll have some brain cells leftover for some study tonight."

"Busy girl," I observed, wondering what time she would be getting home.

"All work and no play makes Bella a dull girl," she sighed.

"Hardly," I said and, feeling daring now, laced my fingers with hers. "But if that's a concern of yours we'll have to do something about that."

Bella cocked her head and smiled at me as a slight flush crept into her cheeks. I could have watched that slow rush of colour for hours, watching the way the blood rushed into her lips to make her look even more delectable.

"Oh really," she replied with a slight smile.

"Mm-hmm," I answered, "can't have you missing out."

"Right now it doesn't feel like I am," Bella commented, watching as I gave a slow, pleased smile.

I was about to speak when Bella looked up in answer to hearing her name called, and saw one of the men – boys, I told myself – waving her over.

"That's my cue to head to work," she said with a smile of regret, "but maybe I'll see you tomorrow." She disengaged herself and stood to collect her books and bag. "Urgh, today's going to be a long one," she muttered. I had gotten to my feet when she had, and looked down at her in surprise as she moved closer. "Um, so I'll see you later, Edward."

"I'm looking forward to it already," I assured her.

For a moment she hesitated and then she reached up and placed her small hand on my shoulder, trailing it down to my elbow in a gesture of goodbye before turning to leave. Despite the warmth of the lecture hall later in the afternoon that had the other students complaining and inspecting the thermostat, I refused to remove my jacket. I wanted to keep her scent on me for as long as possible.

* * * * *

The day was slow and boring but I took mild comfort in the fact that Bella would be in lectures for the afternoon. It would be difficult for anyone new to sneak into the halls given that at this time of the year new students were somewhat rare. Still, Jasper had loitered outside Bella's lectures when he had a break in his schedule, and Alice did the same.

We were all keeping watch now. Even Emmett had taken to swinging past Bella's apartment at night. Even though he knew I was there he wanted to make sure there was nothing untoward was happening outside. Rosalie maintained an attitude of pained disgust, as she seemed unable to comprehend our level of interest in a human. Not even the attraction of something or someone new in our lives was enough to rouse her from her disinterest. Still, she did nothing to hinder and for the most part kept her comments to herself, a fact for which I was grateful even now.

Carlisle maintained his nightshift hours at the hospital and Esme visited him with under the guise of bringing him dinner every night. Their relationship had the nurses sighing and making envious comments as they watched Carlisle kiss Esme goodbye when she left. I wondered what they would make of Esme if they ever saw her during a hunt. For all that she had the face and demeanour of a Madonna her blood lust was just as strong as it was for the rest of us.

Even Carlisle wasn't immune to his curiosity about Bella – my Bella, as I thought of her now - he had accessed her medical history and had been somewhat surprised to see that she was no stranger to hospitals; a broken leg, wrist, numerous contusions and sprains. For a dark moment we had wondered if her injuries had been caused by abusive circumstances, but further investigation and medical notes on her files had revealed nothing. It seemed that Bella had experienced an exceptionally uncoordinated childhood that had been compounded by attempts at horseback riding, trail bikes and other natural adolescent disasters.

Somehow she had managed to survive her teenage years - a fact Carlisle had marvelled the first night he carried her medical file home – and nature had seen fit to endow her with better coordination and Bella had emerged as a graceful and confident woman. It seemed however, that nature still abhorred a vacuum and was now fighting to maintain a balance. For all that Bella could move with more grace (ice notwithstanding), she had become a danger magnet.

I was still in a lecture when Bella's last one for the afternoon had finished, and so I was surprised when I reached the car park to see Bella's distinctive truck. Frowning I had checked my watch. At this time of year it grew dark quickly, and I had no desire to see Bella traversing the college campus alone at night.

Alice and Jasper had made their own way to college that day and so I got out my phone to give them a call.

"She's studying, Edward," Alice said as soon as she answered. Greetings were something she didn't often waste time on when she knew why we were calling.

"Was it planned?" I asked, and waited.

"No," Alice said at last, "spur of the moment, she's an impulsive kinda girl, I like her."

"Say that when you're trying to protect her sometime," I grunted.

"You know you love it," Alice laughed. "Now, she's in the library with friends and it looks like she's going to be there for a while. Everything's fine for a couple hours."

I hesitated at this. With Bella ensconced in the library I could perhaps hunt before going to see her.

"Do it," Alice urged, "you look like shit anyway."

"Thanks," I drawled.

"You do, even Bella noticed earlier." Alice paused, "and Emmett said he'll meet you at the usual place."

"Done," I agreed and hung up.

* * * * *

I left the car at home and ran into the woods after exchanging a brief greeting with those inside. Alice was curled up around Jasper on the couch, the pair of them talking in a rapid buzz of words and Esme was readying herself to visit Carlisle.

I found Emmett waiting for me in a clearing, standing stock-still as he moved his head slightly in reaction to whatever scent he had just picked up.

"Hey, Loverboy," he greeted, grinning at my quiet snort. He delighted in teasing me about Bella had every opportunity, and I let him, knowing that I had his full support.

"Hey, yourself," I replied, "we on?"

"Yup," Emmett jerked a thumb over his shoulder, "there's a herd about 2 miles east."

"Then let's be having it," I replied as I ran past him, hearing his grunt as he took off in hot pursuit.

* * * * *

Two hours later I felt sated and relaxed as I returned to campus. Bella's truck was still there and I parked my Volvo beside it before making my way over to the library.

My phone vibrated in my pocket and I dug it out to see it was Alice calling.

"He's there," she said breathlessly, "you're not going to get there in time but I don't think he's going to try any-,"

I didn't hear anything else she said before I started to run. Rounding a corner I heard the thoughts of someone approaching, and cursed as I had to slow down to a more human speed. It was another student, but they were too deep in thought to notice my sudden appearance. As soon as they were out of sight I sped up again, getting to the library as quickly as I could.

I entered the building and had to stop to gather myself; bursting into the main hall looking wild-eyed and snarling wasn't the kind of appearance I needed to make. Bella's scent was strong; she was still inside. But I could also smell someone else beginning to mingle with her distinctive sweetness.

He was there.

His scent trailed around the room and I followed it carefully. It seemed as if he had strolled around the library, stopping at bookshelves here and there, the better to observe Bella while she studied, all the while moving in slowly decreasing circles towards where she sat. I burned, realising that his scent of death and decay was winding itself around her as he thought he could stake his claim.

She was mine.

"Hey, I remember you."

My head snapped sideways as soon as I heard his voice. I had been tracking him but was still precious seconds behind his movements. He was approaching her desk now, watching her carefully as she looked up and gave him a polite smile.

"Sorry?" Bella tapped her pen against her book as she tried to place him.

"The book store, we bumped into each other," he prompted as he reached the desk and sat down on it.

"Right," Bella shifted in her seat a little, "wow, that's quite a memory you've got there."

"Oh I remember things that I like," James drawled as he gave her a lazy smie.

"Uh-uh," Bella looked unimpressed and I didn't miss that her gaze had darted sideways to see if anyone else would come to her aid.

Of course, the library was emptying out at this time of night, there were precious few students and staff inside, and those that remained with too far away to notice anything untoward going on.

Except for me.

"So, you study here too?" James went on. He made himself comfortable and watched with pleasure as Bella realised he was going nowhere.

"Looks like," Bella muttered, "but it's getting late and I've got lots to do so-," she gave him a look that indicated she was done with the conversation.

"It's late," James smiled, flashing his teeth now, "isn't it dangerous for young woman like yourself to be walking around campus at this hour?"

"It's not late," Bella argued and then involuntarily glanced at her watch, blanching when she saw the time.

"Like I said, it's late," James leaned in a little closer now and Bella leaned back in response before closing her book with a decisive snap.

"Which means I'll be going," Bella stood and began to gather her books. Her heart rate was speeding up and I could detect the acidic bite of adrenaline as it began to flow through her body. James could too, and I saw his eyes darken at the prospect of a hunt.

There was nothing I could do inside the library; it would draw too much attention. I stood helpless as Bella packed up her things, smilingly declined his offer of escort and the speed of her heart quicken when he insisted. I glanced up at the air conditioning vents and tracked the air currents in the room. I was still downwind from James, he hadn't detected me yet, and for Bella's safety I would have to keep it that way until they were outside.

I trailed them to the door and beyond, following them across campus as James made small talk. Bella's answers were non-committal at best. She was withdrawing further into herself and the scent of adrenaline was getting stronger. At last she could sense danger, but there was nothing she could do about it.

But I could.

By the time they had reached the car park there was no-one in sight. James acknowledged this with a satisfied purr as he began to steer Bella towards a darkened section away from the floodlights.

"Nice try, Romeo," Bella attempted a joke, "but my truck's on the other side of the lot."

"Who said anything about romance?" James replied as he reached up to push some hair away from her neck.

"Don't touch me," Bella snapped, looking angry now. "Get away _now_."

"Or you'll what?" James replied moving closer. He reached out again but before his hands could touch her I was there.

My hands slammed into his chest, the force of our impact propelling him through the air until he landed on the asphalt hard enough to leave the surface splintered and cracked. He sprang to his feet and for a breathless moment we crouched face-to-face snarling at each other, the woman behind us entirely forgotten. I heard movement behind me but couldn't afford to break my stare. James crept forward a pace, still in his crouch before his attention was diverted to whomever it was approaching.

Bella was frozen to the spot, her heart rate pounding as her breath came in short gasps.

Keeping my gaze on James I reached out with my mind, feeling a sly grin tug at my lips when I realised who it was. Emmett moved past Bella in a blur and stood beside me, matching my crouch as we silently challenged the nomad.

For a long moment James faced us both before, decision made, he straightened and inclined his head towards us both with an ironic smile.

"Gentlemen," he murmured, "this is quite a surprise."

"Plenty more where that came from," Emmett assured him with a pointed grin.

"Interesting," James mused as he stared behind me to where Bella was regarding us with wide eyes. "You don't feed and yet you object to those who do. This will be a matter of interest to others, I'm sure."

"But not a surprise," I assured him. There were others that knew of our lifestyle so it would be no revelation.

"In that case," James bowed again, at Bella this time. My growl intensified at the notion of James being anywhere near her. "I'll bid you good night. For now."

James straightened and regarded me with a bright stare before he turned and vanished.

"Boy," Emmett said in a loud voice as he clapped his hand on my shoulder with enough boisterous force to propel my feet into the asphalt by an inch, "there's some weirdos around here late at night, huh?"

We both turned to see a pale and shaking Bella rouse herself and turn back towards the direction of her truck, walking with rapid but jerky steps as she dug out her keys.

"Bella," I called as I jogged to her side, "I'm sorry, are you alright?"

"Not really, no," she said as she held her keys in a white knuckled grip. "Who the hell was that guy?"

"Who, Emmett? He's my brother," I said, deliberate misunderstanding as I tried to downplay the situation for all it was worth.

"Nice try, Edward," Bella had reached her truck now and was trying to unlock with door with shaking hands. She dropped her keys into an icy puddle of water at her feet and cursed. She bent down to pick them up but I beat her to it, my hand darting in and out of the water, shaking off the keys before dropping them into her outstretched hand.

Her heart rate was still pounding but I could hear it was beginning to slow a little. "That guy, he's the one I saw at work."

I nodded.

"And he's the guy you saw off at the bar the other night. You know him?"

"Not really," I conceded with reluctance, "but I know he's no good."

"No shit, Sherlock," Bella drawled. "And you," she pointed past my shoulder, "what's the deal with you showing up unexpectedly like that?"

"Me?" Emmett's face was the picture of innocence, "Edward's giving me a lift home."

"Right," Bella was looking exasperated now but surprised us both when she stepped towards Emmett and held out her hand. "If that's the case, I'm Bella."

Emmett glanced at her in surprise before reaching out automatically and gingerly took her hand in his for a brief shake. "Emmett," he replied, "nice to meet you."

_Alice wasn't kidding, she's different_, Emmett thought. All I could do was nod.

"Just as I thought," Bella muttered to herself as she jerked open the truck door and hurling her bag inside, heedless as books tumbled out and fell across the seat.

"Bella," I reached out, surprised when she whirled to face me looking angry.

"Don't you _Bella_ me, Edward. We're going to be having a talk and you're going to be giving me a lot of answers."

Emmett gave a low whistle in the background.

"Don't you start, Emmett, unless you want in on this conversation too," Bella gave him a sharp look before returning her attention to me.

"Me? Uh, no way," Emmett coughed to hide his surprise. _Damn, I think Rose is going to like her too, Bro. She's a firecracker._

Bella swayed a little as she regarded me and I realised her adrenaline was wearing off as she went into mild shock. She was going to be getting tired so it was important that she get home as soon as possible.

"Bella," I tried again, "maybe we can talk later when you're-,"

"Emmett," Bella interrupted, surprising us both again, "I've changed my mind. You think you can take Edward's car home? He and I have some talking to do."

"You okay with that?" Emmett asked me, and I nodded, not taking my gaze away from the angry, trembling woman in front of me. She was magnificent. "Okay, then," Emmett mumbled, grabbing the keys I tossed to him and offering us a sheepish grin as he reversed the car out and slowly drove away.

Bella and I watched the lights of the car as it drove off into the night and then looked at each other.

"What do you want me to say?" I felt helpless now. All my efforts to protect her and ended in near failure.

"What do I want?" Bella handed me the keys. "I want you to drive, I want a drink, and I need you to tell me the truth."

* * * * *

A short drive later she sank into a chair inside the restaurant I had taken us to and was checking out the menu, biting her lip and frowning in concentration.

"Bella," I began.

"Quiet," she said, "I'm trying to stay angry with you right now."

"Trying?" despite the gravity of the situation I couldn't help but smile.

Bella held up a hand for quiet. "Still trying here, don't push me, Cullen."

I sat back in my seat and waited. A waitress approached us to take our order, dismissing Bella with a glance and turning her attention on me. I nodded in Bella's direction and she turned back to her with a slight sigh.

"Scotch and coke," Bella ordered.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but our bar licence is restricted, you'll need to order a meal to be able to-,"

"Fine," Bella interrupted and looked at the menu again, "I'll have the ravioli."

_Little Miss Prissy_, the waitress thought to herself and then turned to face me again. _Hello gorgeous …_

"Just a Coke," I smiled before returning my attention back to Bella.

The woman lingered. "Are you sure there isn't anything else I can get you?"

"No, nothing," I answered, not moving my gaze from Bella who was drumming her fingertips on the tabletop.

Bella watched the waitress move away and then looked at me with a challenging expression. "Do you have to do that?"

"Do what?"

"Dazzle everyone."

"I dazzle people?" I was mystified.

"Oh please," she scoffed, "like you haven't noticed."

"I haven't," I protested in a mild voice. Our drinks were delivered and I watched as Bella drank hers in quick order, sliding my Coke towards her when she was finished. "Here, you need the sugar."

"Thanks," she replied, sipping at the soft drink a little slower this time. "So," she said at last, "some night, huh?"

"You could say that," I agreed. I glanced around the restaurant. The waitress and hostess were regarding us with curiosity, but there were enough other customers in the restaurant to keep them occupied. It was a mellow crowd and so there was nothing different about the two of us that would draw any attention. Other than perhaps our conversation.

"Did you know that guy?" Bella slid her drink aside as her pasta was set before her.

"No, when I saw him at the bar that was the first time I'd met him," I admitted.

"Really," Bella nibbled at some pasta as she gave my words some thought. "It seemed like you knew him."

"We have," I gave a delicate pause, "some people in common."

"Right," Bella nodded. "People." She nodded her head at the empty place setting in front of me. "You're not eating?"

"No," I answered, "I'm on a … special diet."

Bella put her fork down with a sigh. "Edward, you've gotta give me something. Anything, or I'm leaving."

I hunched forward in my seat at this. I needed her to stay. I need to be with her.

"I feel very … protective of you."

"Oh I've noticed, believe me," Bella paused and resumed eating. Her heart rate was almost back to normal now and I could feel that the adrenaline had nearly worked its way out of her system. Her scent was almost back to its delicious sweetness although I wouldn't feel truly comfortable until she had changed clothes and rid herself of James's scent. "And it's appreciated, but right now, Edward, I need more."

"What do you need?" whatever it was, I'd see that she got it. I couldn't afford to lose her now."I think," Bella said slowly, "I need you tell me something like-," she waved a hand in a vague gesture, "I don't know. Make something up to explain your super-speed, the strength I saw tonight, the way you and Emmett are barely room temperature, and the way you speak sometimes," she ended on a breathless laugh. "Because right now things aren't adding up, and I'm wondering if I'm batshit crazy for even thinking that you might be a-,"

"Vampire," I finished for her.

**A/N: Sorry for making you wait, but this story is definitely back in business!**

**Reviews = love.**


	10. Chapter 10

_**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.**_

**Songlines Ch10**

"_What do you need?" whatever it was, I'd see that she got it. I couldn't afford to lose her now._

"_I think," Bella said slowly, "I need you tell me something like-," she waved a hand in a vague gesture, "I don't know. Make something up to explain your super-speed, the strength I saw tonight, the way you and Emmett are barely room temperature, and the way you speak sometimes," she ended on a breathless laugh. "Because right now things aren't adding up, and I'm wondering if I'm batshit crazy for even thinking that you might be a-,"_

"_Vampire," I finished for her._

We sat and regarded each other in silence.

"Yeah right," Bella scoffed as she picked up her drink, "like vampires get around attending college and … and-," her voice trailed off as she studied my face. Her hand, I noticed, only trembled slightly as she set the glass back down on the table. "You're serious," she ventured after swallowing hard.

"I'm not really known for my sense of humour," I answered, keeping my voice low.

"Well," Bella sipped at her drink again and then regarded me with disbelief. "I guess I didn't see that coming."

"You're not surprised?"

"After the evening I've had I don't know what to expect anymore," she shrugged and then cocked her head as she considered me. "What about you, did you think I'd run out of here screaming because you've fessed up?" Bella picked up her fork now and scooped up some pasta. I suspected it was more about having something to do with her hands rather than having any appetite after my revelation.

"Something like that," I admitted. After her reactions of late I didn't know what to expect any more either.

Bella stopped eating and pushed her plate to the side, dabbing at her lips with her napkin and discarding it on the table. She leaned back in her seat slightly as the waitress re-appeared to clear the table, raising an eyebrow as the woman lingered over-long beside me.

"Is there anything else you'd like?"

"I'll have another," Bella chimed in behind her, picking up her empty scotch glass.

"Just a Coke for me," I added.

Bella watched the departing waitress and then glanced back at me with faint disapproval. "That woman has got it _bad_," she commented.

"Whatever it is you say she's got, that's all she's going to get," I said dismissively.

Bella cocked her head to one side as she regarded me. "You really don't get it, do you," she said at last, "you could have women falling at your feet any time you like."

"Too much of a trip hazard," I replied, "and besides, they're not the one that I want."

Our drink order was delivered and Bella sipped at her scotch immediately, trying to use the glass to shield her blush. It was a futile attempt. I could hear her heart beating, see the blood rushing into her face. It was beautiful. I slid my glass of Coke across the table towards her. Bella gave an unexpected smile at the gesture.

"That's one of the first things I noticed," she said as she set her glass down.

"What was?" I leaned forward in my chair as she spoke, fascinated.

"I don't think I've ever seen you eat anything," Bella nodded at the Coke I had given her, "or drink anything for that matter." Another pause and a smile. "Granted the coffee on campus is terrible but even so-", she gave a slight jerk as she remembered something and then looked at me with fresh curiosity. "How did you know where I was going to be this evening?"

"You told me you had a late lecture," I hedged, but Bella wasn't buying it.

"I'm not sure I told you I was going to study in the library afterwards, and you seemed to appear out of nowhere as soon as that creep showed up. How did you do that?"

"I may have had some assistance," I admitted. I was leaning closer to her now and Bella's hands were loosely clasped around her glass. She unconsciously leaned towards me as I spoke in a quiet voice so as not to be overhead. "Alice told me where you were."

Bella gave me a long measuring stare.

"We were worried," I admitted at last.

"We?" Bella's eyes narrowed at this.

"Myself, Alice-," I began, watching as Bella's expression turned to one of surprise.

"Alice is one too?"

I nodded.

"And I suppose that means Jasper ...," her voice trailed off as she gave me an expectant look, and again I nodded.

"And Emmett," she mused aloud, "and I suppose that means your father too."

"That's right," I said cautiously.

"And I'm guessing you have a mother, for all intents and purposes." Bella's eyes took on a distant look at my nod of affirmation and I watched her with alarm as her shoulders began to tremble.

"A vampire family," she began to giggle.

I frowned a little at her reaction; perhaps the shock hadn't worn off after all. After considering the conversation however, I realised the shocks had kept coming. Bella picked up her glass and toasted me before chugging back the contents and thumping the glass onto the table with a flourish.

"I think you'd better finish up with that," I nodded towards the soft drink in front of her and she sighed before obediently picking it up and sipping at it with a little more decorum.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked.

"I've just told you what I am, and you're asking _me?"_ I was hard pressed to conceal my amazement at her concern for me after what she had seen tonight. "Bella, you continue to say the unexpected, and that is a rare gift to someone like me."

"I'm sure there are plenty more surprises where that came from," Bella assured me, "weird is starting to look pretty normal these days." She hesitated for a moment before reaching over and covering my hand with her own. The warmth of her hand was delightful, and I enjoyed the sensation as she rubbed her thumb over the back of my hand in a random pattern before speaking again.

"So, how old are you?" she asked, biting her lip as she waited for my answer.

"Twenty-two," I answered.

"Twenty-two," she mused pulling her hands away from mine, "and how long have you been twenty-two?"

"A while."

"How long?" Bella pushed her half-full glass to one side and sat forward, elbows on the table with her chin propped in her hands as she regarded me with her warm, curious eyes.

"I wonder what you'll think," I mused aloud as I gazed back at her. "I was changed in 1918." I watched her face as the information sank in and her eyes widened.

"Wow," she breathed, and then shook her head. "Sorry, I should be saying some more profound but-," she waved her hand in an inarticulate gesture, "my frame of reference for these kinds of conversation is somewhat limited."

"I should hope so," I smiled at her, trying to relieve the tension.

"Um, so how did it, I mean, you know-," Bella looked at me and tapped two fingers against her neck in a parody of a vampire bite.

"Carlisle," I answered, "he found me dying of Spanish influenza."

"Do you remember it happening?" Bella said.

"Mercifully little," I admitted, "I was all but dead when Carlisle made his decision so things were blurry. I knew that my parents had died and I was alone," I gazed past Bella as the blurred memories sat just on the edge of my vision. My reverie was broken when Bella shifted again to clasp my cold hands in the comforting warmth of her own. "I knew I was in a hospital, and that I was dying but the rest of it was," I closed my eyes briefly against the remembered pain, "it was … difficult."

"I'm sorry," she whispered reaching for my hand again. She was fidgeting in her seat, alternately reaching for me and then pulling away. She didn't seem to know what it was that she wanted and at the same time couldn't stay away. I knew the feeling.

I looked down at our entwined hands with a quiet sigh, revelling in the sensation of simply being touched by someone so warm, so _vital. _ It had been so long since I had felt anything like it. I looked up and saw Bella's gentle smile. Her shock and anger seemed to have dissipated for the time being.

"This evening is nothing like I expected," I murmured, and had to smile at Bella's ironic laugh.

"Preaching to the choir," she agreed. "What were you expecting?"

"Beyond getting to you in time? I honestly don't know.

"You want to get out of here?" Bella suggested, and at my nod we got up. I paid the check against her vocal protests and ushered her out into the night air. The moment we hit the pavement my head was up, tasting the air.

"What are you doing?" Bella looked at me, curious as my gaze searched the street.

"He's still here," I answered and when she stepped back in shock I heard the snarl in my voice. "I can't sense him," I explained in an apologetic tone, "but I know he's not going to run from a fight."

"You're sure," Bella's eyes were huge as she looked up at me and I could see the fear. I felt a moment's regret. Had our paths never crossed she would never have had to experience this.

"I've met enough like him," I admitted, "and from what I heard earlier he-," I broke off as Bella took another step away.

"You mean there are more?" she asked, and at my cautious nod began to rub her arms as if to warm herself, "How many?"

"Many times many," I replied as I watched her reaction, "but they're not here."

Bella looked gave me a sharp look at that. "How can you know?"

"Alice is," I paused, feeling more awkward than I had in a long time, "I suppose you could call her our early warning system. She told us when James arrived."

Bella shivered and looked over her shoulder as if expecting to see an advancing hoard, and then stared down at her feet for a long moment. Decision made, she gave herself a shake and then stepped towards me with a determined air and slipped her arm through mine.

"Take me home," she said simply.

I gazed at the woman standing beside me and found that all I could do was nod.

* * * * *

"What did you hear?"

The car had been silent on the drive back to her apartment and I looked at her in surprise. Her words had come out of silence, out of nowhere, and I found it was an experience I was not used to at all.

"When?" I asked as I flicked her a sidelong look before returning my attention to the road. She wanted to get home, and I wanted to keep her safe, but driving at human speed was as frustrating as ever.

"Before," Bella shifted a little in her seat so that she could face me, "you said you'd heard James, but I don't seem to recall that much conversation."

"Ah," I began. The shock for Bella seemed to be wearing off and now she was beginning to process the evening.

"Go on," she gave an encouraging nod, "I'm a big girl, I can take it."

I bit back a laugh at this; the notion of a woman over 100 years my junior assuring me of her maturity.

"I'll bear that in mind," I assured her in a grave tone.

"And Alice, you said Alice warned you, but how?"

"It's a long story," I began.

"I've got time," she assured me with a wave of her hand and then frowned, "although getting you past Angela may take some explaining."

"What?"

"The car's cold," she explained, "and I figure I'm not going to be sleeping anytime soon until you've told me just what the hell is going on." A line had appeared between her brows, the kind that Esme referred to as 'I want'. "I don't know if this is going to offend your sensibilities but you can come to my room so we can talk." We had arrived at her apartment now and I parked across the street. Bella ducked her head to peer up at the building and then looked at me. "I just don't know how we're going to manage this."

"Leave it to me," I assured her.

I got out of the car and appeared a fraction of a second later to open Bella's door, smiling at her amazement. Walking her to her door, I paused and allowed myself the luxury of reaching up to trail a finger down the soft warmth of her cheek. Her breath hitched and I gave her a brief smile.

"See you soon," I whispered and was gone before she could blink.

I waited, somewhat impatiently, as Bella entered the building. She made small talk with Angela about her day and declined an invitation to watch a movie, instead offering excuses about being tired and making her way to her room. The door to her room closed and I sensed her hesitation before she drew the curtains closed while she changed. Eventually the rustling of fabrics ceased and the curtains were yanked open. Bella appeared in the window backlit against the room as she gazed out into the night before reaching down to open the window.

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing," she muttered to herself. "See you soon," she mimicked my words to herself as she turned away, "don't know how he-," she broke off with a gasp as I appeared at the window. "Okay," she said weakly, "point taken."

"Sorry," I couldn't help but grin at her started expression as I eased myself over the windowsill.

"Guess I should have expected some sort of stunt like that," she replied.

We stood at the foot of her bed and the moment felt oddly shy. I had been in her room many times of course but this was the first time that she had been conscious of the fact.

"So," she began awkwardly, "would you like a seat?" she waved towards the chair – my chair - as she sat down on the bed. She pulled her knees up to her chest and sat regarding me for a long moment, unaware that she was shivering.

"You look cold," I ventured after a pause, "why don't you-," I gestured towards the bedding and sat back in my seat as she crawled over the mattress and pulled back the blankets to get into bed.

"Tell me," Bella suggested after she had gotten herself comfortable against her pillows.

"Tell you what?"

"Everything," she shrugged. "How about you start by telling me how you heard that other vampire earlier, but I didn't hear a thing," she narrowed her eyes at me, "is that some kind of vampire hearing, or something else."

"A little of both," I allowed. "We have enhanced abilities, some-," I paused at this, amazed that I was about to realise so much to a human for the first time in my existence, "some of us more than others," I concluded.

"Such as?" she raised an eyebrow at this.

I sighed and leaned back in my seat, elbows on the armrest as I rubbed my lip with my forefinger.

"Come on," she nodded encouragingly, "spill."

"I can hear people's thoughts," I said at last, and watched as Bella blanched.

"Everyone's?" she unconsciously raised a hand to her temple.

"Most," I corrected, "in my existence there has only been one exception."

"Who was that?" she asked, fascinated now. I said nothing but raised an eyebrow at her.

"Me? Why me?"

"Actually I'm not sure, you're very hard for me to read sometimes, and it's unusual for someone of my-,"

"Advanced years?" Bella answered in a dry tone.

I inclined my head as I yielded to the obvious. "That too."

"Is there something wrong with me?" Bella frowned a little as she said this and again I choked back a laugh. "I'm so glad I amuse you."

"Here's the thing, tonight I've told you that I'm a vampire that can read minds, and you're worried that there's something wrong with _you_. Oh, Bella," I sighed as I gazed at her. "You've no idea how amazing you are."

This time it was Bella who raised an eyebrow.

"It's an evening of surprises," she said at last, "but tell me something?"

"After all the other revelations? Name it," I spread my hands in surrender.

"Why me?"

"I don't know how to explain it," I began, choosing my words carefully, "other than to say you are very … special to me."

Bella cocked her head as she considered my words. "Special, how?"

"I don't know what sort of analogy to use in this context, other than to say you have a certain appeal."

Bella considered this and then shook her head, settling herself more comfortably against her pillows. "Nope, sorry. You're going to have to give me more to go on than that."

"I'll try," I said as I looked at her warily.

"I'll be fine," she assured me, "no screaming, no running. Promise."

"Well," I took a deep breath that I didn't need and went on, "ask yourself this one basic question: what is it that we eat?"

Bella blinked. "Do I have to say it?"

I nodded.

She said it.

"That's right, although my family are different to others of our kind. We only eat the blood of animals," I paused and gave her a wry smile, "I guess that makes us the vegetarians of the vampire world."

There was another moment of silence as Bella digested my words.

"Fine, " she said at last, "you eat blood. There are plenty of lifestyle choices out there, yours isn't _that_ gross I suppose."

"What?" I gaped at her.

"Come on," she scoffed, "look at the big picture here, Edward. You live on blood, big deal. Humans kill animals and eat their flesh, their organs, carve them up and wear them as clothing. Does that make us more or less savage than you?"

"Uh," I didn't know what to say and I wondered if there would be a time when she would cease to surprise me. I hoped not.

"Have you always been a .. uh …that is to say, have you-," she stuttered at this.

"Vegetarian?" I finished for her. "Sadly, no. Jasper and I are the only two not to have trodden the same path as the family." It didn't escape my attention that Bella tucked her chin into her neck as I spoke.

"How-," she began, and I took pity on her again and continued to speak. "I was changed by Carlisle and followed his lifestyle. Jasper was changed by … others."

"Ah," Bella's nod was sage now, "meat eaters."

"Something like that," I grimaced at her choice of phrase.

"So, you went off your diet for a while and then got back on the straight and narrow," Bella commented, "I think that happens to everyone."

"True, but people don't usually die as a result," I added, and watched her confident gaze falter.

"They," she swallowed, "died? How many?"

"Too many," I admitted, "for a while there I guess I rebelled against the family. I only preyed upon those whose thoughts and actions were so morally despicable that the world would be a better place without them." I paused as faces and screams flashed through my mind's eye. "That was my justification at the time."

"Okay," Bella said in a slightly weaker voice this time, "but you're a vegetarian now, right?"

"Right," I smiled at her relief.

"Can't say I'm not glad to hear that," she admitted. "And you say I have a certain appeal, how?"

"Imagine you're a chocolate addict," I began and then gave her a sheepish grin. "Sorry, didn't mean to describe you in terms of food."

"If the shoe fits," she murmured.

"Let's go with something else," I suggested.

"Heroin?" she suggested, and then at my look of surprise blinked at me, "you're talking about something totally addictive, how's that for an analogy?"

"Pretty good," I admitted. "If that's what you were – are – whatever, it's like you were made for me and no-one else."

Bella ducked her head again. "I'm trying really hard not to take this as a compliment," she grinned, "but on some really sick level it's actually kind of flattering."

"Bella," I was deadly serious now, "the only reason it's in any way flattering is because you're still alive for us to talk about it. If I had been any weaker on the day I first saw you, you would have been dead before the fact even had time to register. Believe it."

Bella regarded me for a long moment. "I believe you."

We sat looking at each other in silence. The vampire and the human.

"So, why am I still here?"

I looked down at my feet and ran both hands through my hair. "I don't know," I confessed, "but I'm glad that you are."

"Me too," she offered a slight smile. She lay curled up in bed, her fingers tracing an idle pattern on the covers. "So," she began, "is your day ending or beginning?" She nodded towards the window when I looked at her inquiringly.

"Right," I nodded, "Neither."

"Really?" She looked surprised at this, "you mean you don't sleep in a coffin or have-," she broke off with a slight flush at her own foolishness.

"No dungeons, no coffins, no moats," I explained with a grin, "and I don't sleep."

"Ever?"

"Ever," I confirmed, watching her as she took in my words, worrying at her bottom lip with her teeth. I had thought my evenings watching her sleep were wonderful, but sitting here now watching emotions flitter across her face, watching her as she watched me; it was perfection. Now I watched as her expression contorted and she raised a hand apologetically as she covered her mouth and yawned.

"Sorry," she said before yawning again. "It's not even that late."

"Could be delayed shock, adrenaline fatigue," I suggested. "You've had quite a night."

"Certainly out of the ordinary," she agreed. She leaned back against her pillows and regarded me with a gaze that was becoming progressively fatigued. "I don't want to sleep," she admitted.

"All evidence to the contrary," I teased her with a gentle smile. "Why's that?"

"Because I'll go to sleep and when I wake up, you'll be gone." She looked sad now and I wished I knew why. "Today has been so strange, if I wake up without you it'll be as if it never happened."

"Perhaps that would be for the best," I suggested.

"No," she shook her head vehemently, "things can't go back the way they were, not now that I know there's more."

"More?" I cocked my head at her.

"Now there's you," she admitted. She shifted in the bed again, obviously fighting sleep now.

"Sleep," I encouraged in a soft voice.

"You'll stay?" she said in a bleary tone as she nuzzled her head against one of the pillows.

"I'll stay," I assured her, "where else would I want to be?"

Her eyes were closed and she smiled as I spoke. Her smile relaxed and subsided, as her face became slack with sleep. I leaned back in my seat and watched as her breathing hitched for a moment and then settled into a deep and steady rhythm.

There was a strand of hair across her face that obscured her eyes from me. I stared at it for a long time until it became too much. I stood up and paced quietly over to the bed, brushing the hair off her face with a gentle hand. There, perfect. I stood gazing down at her, at her stillness, marvelling that even after the near-catastrophic events of the evening, her expression could be so peaceful.

I resumed my seat and waited. Another hour or two and she would begin to speak. It was always my favourite part of the evening.

**A/N: I'm back! **_**Take The Cake**_** was keeping me very busy, but not that one's finished I'm back on this story. For any TTC readers checking this out, there will be some out-takes very soon, and I'm working my way through my review replies. You're all fabulous, and I love and appreciate each and every one of you.**

**I've MISSED my Songlines Vamps, and Vamp Jasper has been very interesting of late. You'll find out in later chapters, which I hope will be coming your way soon. **


	11. Chapter 11

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I just like playing 'what if' …_

_Special thanks to Sassygirl for her help …_

**Songlines Ch11**

Bella had moved about in the bed for a few hours before settling into true sleep. I watched her eyelids begin their telltale flutter moments later and leaned forward in my seat. It wouldn't be long now. I don't know what I expected her to say. For Bella the evening had contained one shock after another. For me there had been just as many.

The encounter with James had been unwelcome but not entirely unexpected. Our initial encounter had piqued his interest. The notion that a family of vampires such as ourselves would willingly interact with humans and then go so far as to protect one now meant that he was fascinated. He was not going to rest until he had discovered – and in all likelihood destroyed – all that he could. He knew of my interest in Bella, although how much he knew of my fascination was still unknown.

I sighed as I watched Bella sleep. Her lips parted as her breathing quickened as she frowned, her legs kicking the blankets aside. The situation was growing increasingly complicated. Had I never become aware of Bella's existence her life would have continued on its predetermined path. Now it was my turn to frown as I realised that same destiny would have concluded beneath the wheels of Tyler's poor driving skills. Bella's eyes flickered again and I watched as her hand flexed and clenched at her pillow.

As long as I remained in Bella's life the danger to her would remain. Perhaps it would be better if I removed myself from the situation, from the temptation. I blinked as I realised my gaze had strayed to the steady beat I would see pulsing on her neck. Immediately my thirst ripped and tore at my throat, making me close my eyes and cease breathing in a desperate bid to maintain a semblance of control. The danger to Bella existed within her immediate surroundings as well as without, and I was a fool if I tried to convince myself otherwise.

Getting up from the chair I paced soundlessly towards the window, hands clenched as I stared out into the night. Angela was dreaming, as were the people in the apartment downstairs. Dreams of others in the vicinity were a blurred murmur in my head that I knew I could hear clearly if I chose to. I turned back to the bed and made myself focus on the only things I knew that could calm me: the sound of Bella's heartbeat and the rhythm of her breath. I shut out all other distractions and focussed on Bella until the sounds around me fell away and I felt cocooned in her silence.

And then the silence was broken.

"Edward," Bella breathed. Her lips moved soundlessly as I watched but she said nothing more.

She had only said one word but it was enough, and after the revelations of the evening more than I had ever hoped for.

The little pulse point in her throat kept beating and her heartbeat was a loud counterpoint to my own internal silence. My thirst burned again and I opened my mouth to draw in a rasping breath. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I smiled as I fished it out, already anticipating whom the message would be from.

_U need to hunt. She wont wake. A._

I looked at the sleeping form on the bed as I hesitated but Alice had a point, I wasn't going to be much good if my thirst was going to be a continued distraction. I sat down again. I'd hunt, but I wasn't going to leave until I knew someone else would watch over Bella. Another message.

_Go. Em will watch._

It didn't take long, twenty minutes at best before I caught a familiar thought pattern: _Reporting in, get going._

I exited Bella's room after another regretful look back and reached ground level to see Emmett grinning at me from the shadows.

"Look at you," Emmett said admiringly, "you look like _shit_. When did you last eat?"

"Good to see you too, Emmett," I replied in a caustic tone, "and thanks for stopping by."

"Anytime," he gave with an expansive smile, "Alice got me on my way back."

"Where's it good?"

"Six miles due east," he replied promptly, "I saw a couple of good ones for you," he grinned, "kinda feisty by the looks of things so you'll have your work cut out for you." His enthusiasm was contagious and I found myself grinning as Emmett all but licked his lips.

"Thanks, see you soon."

"No rush," Emmett waved me off, "from what everyone tells me she seems like a good kid."

That stopped me in my tracks.

"Emmett," I gave him a long look, "she's not a _kid_."

"Well yeah I know that," he spread his hands in a placatory gesture, "I just meant compared to us-," he stopped when he saw the look on my face.

"She's nothing like us, Emmett," I stated in a quiet voice.

"I know," Emmett nodded at me, his face blank with innocence. He blinked and looked up at the darkened window of Bella's room. "She's different."

I nodded. "She is," I agreed as I followed his gaze.

"Different is good," Emmett said as he shot me another quick smile. "Always figured it'd take someone out of the ordinary to get your attention. I'm glad you found her."

"So am I," I admitted. Unfortunately, others had found her as well.

* * * * *

By the time I eased myself back into her bedroom the sky was tinged with the pink of early dawn. Bella was curled into a relaxed crescent shape on the bed with one foot sticking out of the covers and pale with cold. I tugged the blanket over her and made sure she was covered and warm before I took my seat again, and didn't move again until she did.

It was nearly 7am before Bella stirred moments before her alarm clock began a static buzzing and I watched as she reached out and flailed at the digital sentinel without even opening her eyes. She subsided into bed with a sigh before sitting upright with a hoarse gasp. Blinking she saw me sitting precisely where I had been when she had gone to sleep.

"You're here," she stared at me, heedless of her tousled hair and eyes that were still puffy with sleep.

"I am," I nodded, somehow contriving to bow although I was still sitting down.

"I know, I mean, you're _here_," Bella went on.

"Right," I replied a little less assuredly now.

"So I didn't dream it," Bella continued as she pushed and punched her pillows into a comfortable position behind her before turning back to regard me with fascination. "Last night really happened."

"I did," I nodded.

Bella narrowed her eyes and looked at me for a long time.

"Come here," she said suddenly, patting the mattress beside her.

I stood up and had taken a couple of steps towards her when she held up a hand to halt me, an odd look on her face.

"Hold on," she looked a little uncomfortable now. "I'll be right back," she threw back the covers and got out of bed with an apologetic smile. "Bathroom break," she explained as she excused herself and left the room.

I remained standing, unsure what to do. Bella arrived a few minutes later having brushed her teeth and gotten her hair back until control, smiling as she eased herself around me and got back into bed.

"C'mere," She invited.

I sat down cautiously and watched as Bella cocked her head and smiled at me.

"You know, if I didn't know better I'd think you were even more uncomfortable now than you were last night at the restaurant."

"This is a little different for me," I admitted. Bella raised an eyebrow at this and I continued. "Bear in mind I'm old fashioned at heart."

"Oh," Bella's face lit up with understanding as she nodded before her smile turned teasing, "and here you are in my _boudoir_, am I right?"

"Something like that," I admitted, trying not to squirm. I was a vampire and over one hundred years old. Squirming was no longer in my nature, and yet now I felt the need to.

"Edward," Bella leaned forward to cup my chin in her hand and turn my face towards hers. "For a guy that doesn't have a pulse, I could swear you were blushing."

I blinked and moistened dry lips. "Bella, I-," I began. It was time to confess my nocturnal visitations.

"What have you done?" Bella's gaze was intense now and I was about to speak when she raised a hand to trace beneath my eyes. "Your eyes, they're a different colour."

"You noticed?" I was staring and reminded myself to blink more often.

"Uh-huh, they were black last night, now they're golden," Bella considered me with a thoughtful air and I allowed her to tilt my chin this way and that as she studied me. "Why is that?"

"Let's just say it's diet related and leave it at that," I suggested, smiling as she released my chin and sat back.

"So while I was sleeping you left to get yourself a-,"

"Midnight snack?" I suggested, and at her nod continued, "Yes I did. And before you can ask, mountain lion is my favourite."

"Right," Bella nodded, "I'm more a savoury muffin girl myself."

We exchanged a small smile of mutual understanding and the mood in the room lightened.

Bella jumped as she heard a door in the apartment close and looked at me with mild panic.

"Angela," I clarified, "she's in the bathroom now and doesn't know I'm here."

"And are we going to keep it that way?" Bella asked.

"If that's what you want," I shrugged.

"It is," Bella admitted after a considered pause, "for now. We'll deal with more later."

"Agreed," I got to my feet. "I'll leave you to get ready."

"You're going?" Bella was surprised and I gave her a smile. I wanted to stay. If I was honest with myself I never wanted to leave her side again, but we had many miles to go.

"I'll see you downstairs. I'm driving you to college today and I have to go before Angela gets out of the bathroom."

"Right," Bella nodded distractedly. "I'll see you soon."

* * * * *

"Are the others going to be there?" Bella asked as she got into my car and buckled herself in.

"Alice and Jasper? Yes, they've both got lectures," I said as I gunned the car and manoeuvred us into traffic.

"Mmph," Bella nodded, "why bother?"

"Why not?"

"C'mon, Edward," Bella turned to look at me, "surely you guys have seen it all before, what could you have to learn at college?"

"You'd be surprised," I answered, "and anyway staying at college is an excellent way to blend in."

"Blend in?" Bella looked sceptical.

"You have to admit it's better than high school," I commented as I glanced at her and grinned at her astonishment.

"No," she breathed, "that would be hell on earth, how many times have you had to do that?"

"A few," I shrugged, "and your assessment is entirely correct.

"But," Bella grimaced with distaste, "high school?"

"Think about it," I urged her, "the younger we start out, the longer we can stay in that location."

"Right," Bella nodded at this and then looked at me with something akin to pity. "Awful."

"Yes it is," I sighed, unable to present any kind of upbeat charade, "but it's an effective one." I smiled at her, "Although having said that I daresay a high school where you were would have made the experience more endurable."

"Flatterer," she poked out her tongue at me, making me laugh.

We arrived on campus and I parked the car and held out a cautionary hand to Bella to stop her as she reached to open the door.

"Allow me," I smiled and got out. Bella may have thought my actions were civil and of course they were, but keeping her in the vehicle also gave me the opportunity to scent the air. I could sense no immediate danger, although there were two scents that had me lifting my gaze and looking over to see Alice's distinctive canary yellow Volkswagon. She and Jasper both greeted me with a wave.

_All clear_, Alice projected as Jasper gave a cautious nod.

Opening the door for Bella I stood back and waited as she collected her satchel. It didn't escape my notice that her eyes darted over to the area of the parking lot where the altercation had occurred last night, before she followed my gaze to see my waiting siblings.

"Looks like someone lit Alice's fuse," Bella murmured as I closed the door and we strolled across the lot towards them.

"She's excited," I answered and then looked down in surprise as Bella took my hand. She simply smiled and squeezed my hand, or at least tried to. The experience would have been akin to squeezing granite but I was touched at her gesture nonetheless.

"I think I am too," Bella confided as we drew new.

Alice was all but vibrating with eagerness as she stood beside Jasper who had his arm around her shoulders as he projected wave after wave of calm. Bella's heartbeat increased and I looked down at her concern just in time to see her draw in a long breath.

"Bella," Alice stepped forward eagerly, "I-," she hesitated and looked at me. "Can I?"

"I think you're asking the wrong person," I nodded to the woman standing beside me, clutching my hand between both of her own.

Alice looked at Bella and I was startled to see the yearning on my sister's face. Bella's heartbeat thudded in her chest before abruptly it began to calm down.

"Nothing's changed," she muttered to herself and then looked up at Alice with a broad smile of welcome. "Hey, guys."

"Oh," Alice's face puckered for a moment and had she been able I'm sure she would have been on the point of tears. "Hey, Bella."

"Hey, Alice," Bella smiled before shaking herself free of my grasp and stepping towards her with her arms outstretched. "C'mere."

Alice pitched forward into her arms and the two women shared a hug.

"_Finally,_" Alice huffed when she released her, "you have no idea how long I've been waiting for that."

"Oh really?" Bella arched an eyebrow at that and shot me a sidelong glance, "have you been holding out me?"

"No more than usual," I shrugged.

"That much, huh?" Bella cuffed me as she leaned into my side laughing before she sobered enough to look at Jasper who was still holding back from the group. "Hi, Jasper."

"Bella," he inclined his head with a brief smile that became more genuine when Alice clasped his hand and murmured reassurances in a tone that was too low for human ears to hear. The parking lot was a hub of activity at this time of the morning and the ebb and flow of students that served as a reminded that there was still a charade to be attended to.

"Come on," I took Bella's hand, "I'll walk you to your class."

Bella allowed herself to be led towards the nearest path as Alice and Jasper followed. "Edward, I'm pretty sure I know the way."

"I'm sure you do, but I want to get you there safe and sound."

"Right," Bella snorted, "you want to come to the lecture with me and hold my hand while I try not to fall asleep?"

We walked on in silence for a few beats as I considered it.

"Edward," Bella went on, "I was joking."

"I know," I nodded, "but I'm not."

"I noticed," she muttered with a rebellious expression that I had come to recognise.

I stopped walking and waited as Bella turned to face me before placing my hands on her shoulders.

"Bella, try to accept the fact that you are the most important thing in my life right now, and I'm going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe."

"Whatever it takes? That sounds really-,' Bella began and then stopped when she saw the expression on my face, "serious," she concluded in a weak voice. "Edward, you're not going to do anything foolish are you?"

"I won't if you won't," I assured her, releasing her and stepping back to give her some space. There was a beat of silence before Bella nodded once and then resumed her walk to class. I followed.

This time entering the lecture hall was different. We entered the room and I held back letting Bella take the lead while I took a moment to adjust to the volume of everyone's thoughts. Giving me a quick glance over her shoulder, Bella set off up the aisle slowly unfurling her scarf as she went, exchanging greetings with other students she knew. I thought she would have taken a seat in her customary place but again she surprised me. She kept walking until she reached the last row of seats in the hall, moving along from the aisle until she was sitting flush against the wall. It was where I usually sat. She missed nothing. She watched me as I regarded her for a second before sitting down, keeping the seat between us vacant.

"What's the matter," she frowned at me, "do I smell?"

I grinned at her. "You do, and it's delectable."

Her eyes widened at my small joke.

"Really?" Reaching up she wound a lock of hair around her fingers and took a surreptitious sniff. "It's probably just my shampoo."

"It's more than that," I assured her, and then at her nod of encouragement I got up and shifted so that I was sitting directly beside her. "Is this okay?"

Bella smiled and leaned against me slightly. "It's good."

I was about to speak again when I hesitated and looked down the hall at the other students that were filtering in. Some of them - including Tyler and Mike - had thought that Bella wasn't attending today. I watched as they scanned the room looking for her, their eyes widening with surprise when they saw where she was sitting and with whom. I kept my face impassive as I matched their stares before glancing down at the woman beside me when she nudged me.

"Be nice," she murmured.

"I'm trying," I muttered back as I did my best to focus my attention on her rather than the whining voices I could hear.

_She's with him?_

_When did he start tappin' that?_

I felt a rumble of a growl beginning in my chest at their derogatory comments, which broke off as Bella reached over and settled her hand on mine.

"Here," she said as she turned her wrist so that my thumb rested against her pulse. "Focus on that."

Astonished, I did what she told me and found myself counting the reassuring beats as her blood pulsed through the thin membrane at her wrist, focussing on the warmth I could feel beneath my fingertips. I sighed and closed my eyes, concentrating on the metronome that sang to me in a whisper that human could ever understand. When I opened my eyes fifty two beats later it was to see Bella regarding me with a warm smile.

"Feel better?" she asked.

"I do," I replied, surprised at her understanding, "but how did you know that would-,"

"Last night," Bella explained, cutting my question short. "When we were talking, you kept looking at my neck. It took me a while to work out why, but I think I'm getting it now."

"Ah," I nodded at this and felt ashamed.

"Hey, none of that," she nudged me again, "we are what we are."

"I don't know that I deserve you," I confessed suddenly. The notion that I had found someone like Bella whose blood appealed to me on a level that nothing ever had before was astonishing. Even more wondrous was the fact that I had managed not to give in to my thirst and instead sat with the object of my desire beside me, alive and well.

"You probably don't," she gave me an impish grin, "but it goes both ways." She shrugged at my questioning gaze. "Still, there are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamed of in our philosophies," she paraphrased. She cocked her head at regarded me for a beat. "Did you know Shakespeare?"

Now it was my turn to nudge Bella in good humour, although I did so with caution as given my imperviousness to harm and her human fragility it was not unlike trying to nudge a soap bubble.

"Listen, human, I'm old but I'm not _that_ old," I muttered.

"Sorry," she gave a snuffle of laughter soundly entirely unrepentant, "my bad."

"Carlisle may have," I went on, grinning at her look of shock. A noise at the front of the lecture hall caught my attention and I nodded for Bella to look. "Lecture's starting," I added as I settled back in my seat, only too aware that Bella was still regarding me with wide eyes. Bella remained staring at me for a long time and although I couldn't hear what she was thinking I could have made an educated guess. She knew many of my secrets now, and my family's by default. The occasional sharp tang of adrenaline in her system told me that she experienced the occasional jolt of worry or fear at my frank admissions, but it seemed that her natural curiosity was going to outweigh her survival instinct for the time being.

Finally she dragged her attention away from me and began to focus on the lecture. After a few minutes she roused herself again and dug into her satchel to pull out her notebook and pen to begin writing down some salient points for future reference. I sat back and took in the lecture although the words being recited had no hope of holding my complete attention. The occasional waft of scene from Bella had me swallowing hard against the instinctual surge of venom, and I studied some of the other students in an attempt to water down my focus.

Most of the students were following the lecture. Some of them were already trying to apply the lesson to their current essays, others were thinking about their plans for the rest of the week, and from time to time I caught a stray thought about Bella and myself. Jessica seemed to be dwelling on us more than I would consider healthy, but the citrus tang of her thoughts revealed more jealousy than any genuine curiosity on her part. I leaned a little closer to Bella, muffling my smile when Jessica turned in her seat to look at us again: Bella focussing on her notebook as she scribbled furiously with one hand while I gently cupped the other.

Bella had filled two pages of her notebook before she thought to glance over at me and saw that I hadn't unpacked my satchel at all.

"You're not taking notes?" she whispered.

"Perfect recall," I replied as I tapped my temple with one finger.

"Very convenient I'm sure," Bella said after a moment's pause, "and is there anything you _can't_ do?"

"Tan," I deadpanned. Bella shook with silent laughter and had to clap a hand over her mouth as an irrepressible giggle slipped out, making a couple of people in the rows in front of us look over their shoulders.

"Pay attention," I admonished, suddenly realising that I was enjoying myself immensely.

* * * * *

"Oh god," Bella was rubbing her side as she took a seat in the library opposite Alice and Jasper two hours later, "it hurts."

"What hurts? What happened?" Alice looked curious as she glanced at me over Bella's shoulder. _Should I have kept watch? What did I miss?_

"Relax, Alice," Bella assured her, "Edward was trying to make me laugh all through the lecture," she explained as she sat down and bent over rubbing her side again, "it just hurt trying not to give in to it for a couple of hours."

"Really," Jasper drawled as he and Alice both looked at me in surprise.

"I know, ole sober sides here has quite the evil sense of humour when you get him going," Bella teased.

"Huh," Jasper ventured but said nothing more as he raised an eyebrow at me.

We had been sat making small talk for a while before Bella flipped her satchel open and began to dig through it, emerging with a small bag of trail mix. "Sorry, you don't mind do you? I'm starving."

"Not at all," Alice waved a hand, "you're just fortunate that your snacks are so portable."

"True," Bella agreed as she popped a piece of dried apricot into her mouth and chewed with obvious relish, "I don't exactly have to stash a fox in my bag," she swallowed and looked at the three of us in turn.

"Wow," Jasper said at last. _Amazing._

"Tell me about it," I said with feeling, ignoring Bella's look of inquiry.

"Don't you want to get some lunch?" Alice asked as she looked over at the wall mounted clock nearby, "You're going to need more than that," she indicated the small packet of trail mix Bella was holding.

"Probably," Bella nodded, "but I just thought-," she broke off and made a wry face. "I didn't want you guys to have to sit and watch me eat what we call food when you're used to food that's ... uh," she paused and for the first time looked a little uncomfortable as she searched for the right word.

"Fresher?" Jasper supplied with a droll smile.

"Exactly," Bella smiled her relief.

"Good point," Alice nodded, "but there's no need to stand on ceremony." Reaching across the table she picked up Bella's books and slid them across the table to her. "Go eat."

"I'll come with you," I said as I stood up and waited to pull out Bella's seat as she twisted her snack bag closed and stuffed it into her pocket.

"There's no need," she murmured as I helped her on with her coat, "I'm sure my food smells awful to you."

"Small price to pay for the pleasure of your company," I assured her as I offered her my arm with a broad smile.

_So happy-,_ Alice cut off the rest of her thought abruptly as I glanced over at her.

"Am I missing something?" Bella asked as she glanced from Alice to myself.

"Not at all," Alice assured her with a grin. _Esme's going to want to meet her soon, you know that, right?_

"Let's go," I said smoothly and let Bella out of the library as a very smug Alice and amused Jasper waved us off.

We made our way to the nearby food outlets on campus and after brief deliberation Bella settled on sushi for lunch.

"You eat everything raw," she winked at me in jest, "I'll try it too."

I shook my head at her, amused, as I carried her tray towards a vacant table.

"You know," Bella commented later as she helped herself to another piece of sushi, "maybe I could watch you hunt some time."

"What?" I was shocked, "No, absolutely not. That's out of the question."

Bella regarded me as she chewed. "And that's your final answer?"

"It's just that-," I broke off and ran a hand through my hair before returning my attention to Bella who was placidly finishing off her lunch. "Jesus, woman, have you no self preservation at all?"

"What are you talking about? It's not as if I'm offering myself up on a bed of salad greens to you and your family," she shrugged, "I was just curious is all."

A quick scan of our vicinity revealed that no-one was paying us any attention.

"Bella," I began in a gentler tone, "you need to understand that we don't just feed, we _hunt_."

"Uh-huh," she sipped at her green tea and nodded for me to continue.

"Our food isn't served up in neat little portion sizes," I went on, "we have to actively track and hunt it down. Just because I'm sitting here in public with you doesn't mean that we're nice and polite all the time. We have to give ourselves over to our baser instincts."

Bella set down her cup and gave me her full attention. "Go on," she said in a quiet voice.

"We hunt entirely on instinct," I swallowed down the venom that had surged at the mere thought of hunting, licking my lips before speaking again. "There are times when I'm around you that I can barely hold myself in check, if I were to catch your scent while I was hunting-," I broke off and shook my head as my hands clenched into fists. "No guarantees," I whispered after a long pause. Moving very deliberately I uncurled my fists and laid my palms flat on the table.

"I'm sorry," Bella offered. She shifted in her seat and then very slowly reached out to run her forefinger over mine, "I didn't think."

"You shouldn't have to," I admitted. "This is all wrong."

"What do you mean?" Bella's expression shifted from contrite sympathy to confusion in the space of a heartbeat.

"This," I indicated the table where her plate and cup sat waiting for collection; I hadn't bothered with the charade of eating. "You're a human and I'm-," a grimace as I recalled the tone of our conversation. "It's all wrong. You should be doing other things." I was feeling increasingly morose as I warmed to my subject. "Human things."

"Right, because that's _so _noble and exciting," Bella replied as she swigged back the last of her tea. "Sorry, Edward, I appreciate your concern but it's too late for that now."

"Too late for what?" I asked as I began to sift through possibilities. I could maintain a distance between us, socialise less, perhaps I could even leave town. My phone vibrated and I got it out with a small sigh already knowing whom it would be from.

_Don't even think about it. U promised._

I put the phone back in my pocket and looked up to see Bella regarding me with a rebellious expression.

"This isn't up for negotiation, Edward."

"Oh really," I raised an eyebrow at her tone, "don't I have some say in this?"

"Of course," she graciously inclined her head, "as long as we have the understanding that I have a say in things too." She crumpled her paper napkin and tossed it onto her plate before gathering her things with a determined air. I rose to my feet automatically as Bella stood, my mother's lessons still an ingrained habit even though the teacher was decades gone. "Come on," she said in a softer voice now, "the others will be waiting."

Bella set a casual pace as we made our way back to the library, her arm linked through mine. She was quiet for a long time and so I kept my peace.

"Last night," Bella ventured, "when you stayed in my room,"

"Mmm," I nodded.

"I keep, uh-," a slight flush crept into Bella's cheeks, "forget it," she said at last.

"What were you going to say?" I was curious now.

"I said forget it," Bella snapped, and I realised she was embarrassed, "we'll talk about it later."

"Do I get a say in it?" I asked as I gave her a quiet smile.

Bella shot me a glance as she tried and failed to repress a smile of her own. "Of course," she nodded, "I'll ask the questions and you can provide the answers."

"Sounds like fun," I muttered.

"I think so," Bella's smile was broader as her humour returned. "In the meantime, I've got another lecture in half an hour and it's one I know you don't take. How are you going to get around that Mr Protective?"

"I'll wait," I answered as I gave her a quiet smile of my own.

"Right, you'll wait," Bella scoffed.

"You'll see," I replied in a placid tone.

"All better?" Alice looked up with an inquiring smile as we approached the table. They had strewn a couple of workbooks and texts on the table, creating the usual student detritus to make it look like they had been a hub of activity.

"Much," Bella nodded, "it was very … enlightening."

"Thought it might be," Alice gave a serene smile as she began to pack up her things. "You've got another lecture this afternoon?"

"Yeah," Bella sighed as she perched herself on the edge of the table, "minus the amusement factor," she gave me a sidelong look. "It's going to drag."

"I'll be waiting for you when you finish," I assured her, startled when she reached up to tug at the hem of my shirt.

"I think I'd like that," she smiled.

* * * * *

True to my word I had waited outside Bella's lecture, leaning against a pillar all but motionless unless there were other humans nearby. The drone from the lecture hall was a steady hum, but I found that if I concentrated hard enough I could pick out the one steady beat out of all the others that could sustain me.

"Are you going to bring her home?" Alice appeared at my elbow grinning up at my quiet groan.

"You're not going to give up on this are you," I commented as she stood swaying from side to side, looking like a child that had a particularly delicious secret that she was longing to share.

"Nope," she grinned before her tone turned wheedling. "C'mon, Edward. I've seen it. Esme wants to meet her, and Bella already knows Carlisle from the hospital. Emmett and Rosalie are away hunting tonight and Jasper will be fine," she rattled off the family statistics, counting them off on her fingers one by one. "It'll be really good," she coaxed, "you'll have an especially nice time."

I looked at her, startled as I caught the stray edge of a vision. It had been of Bella laughing up at me, her eyes crinkling with genuine amusement. I had caught the edge of a framed picture in the background, one that I knew hung in my room back at the house. Alice caught the vision before I could see more and stuffed it back behind her eyes.

"Very good," I nodded, "I almost caught that one."

"What did you see?" Alice accused as she huffed in annoyance.

"Enough," I allowed.

"Well?" Alice pressed again.

"We'll see," was all I was willing to concede at this point. There was after all, the matter of Bella being consulted before I drew her further into the vampire nest that she had discovered.

"I already have," Alice nodded with satisfaction. "I really like her, Edward," she added.

"Really? I might never have noticed," I quipped.

Alice looked startled at my mild joke and then smiled. "I really like what she's doing for you too."

"We'll see," was all I said.

At long last the lecture disgorged its students for the afternoon and Bella appeared looking tired but thoughtful as she strolled towards Alice and I, hugging her notebook to her chest.

"Hey," she greeted and to my great astonishment leaned against the pillar beside me and rested her head on my shoulder. "I'm tired," she announced, "I think my brain is full." She looked at her watch and sighed. "I was going to put in some more study hours in the library this afternoon but I think I'll blow it off."

"Good, let's go," Alice promptly as she took Bella by the arm and began to tow her in the general direction of the parking lot. "Edward, we're taking your car."

"What?" I caught up with them and exchanged a bewildered shrug with Bella.

"Jasper's got a late lecture, and he's going to have to hunt before he gets home anyway. Let's go," Alice said, "Esme's waiting."

"Esme?"

"Carlisle's ma-," I hesitated over the word before continuing, "his wife."

"Wife," Bella narrowed her eyes at me, "right. Okay then, lead on."

"Just like that?" I gazed at her, wondering where this sudden display of bravery was going from.

"Just like that," Bella nodded. "My dad used to say that sometimes 'what the hell' was the best answer, so I'm just following his advice."

"But you don't know what you're getting yourself into," I objected.

"And there's only one way to find out," Bella replied in a complacent tone. She dug out her cell phone and began typing out a quick text message. "I'm even sending Angela a message telling her exactly who I'm with so if I don't show up back home sometime you've all got trouble," she said. She finished the message and then dropped her phone back into her pocket. "Satisfied?"

"Not really," I admitted.

"But we're going anyway?" Bella kept walking and without looking extended a hand for me to grasp. I took it and felt the familiar comfort that her warmth always imparted.

"We're going," I sighed.

Alice beamed. _I really, really like her, Edward_.


	12. Chapter 12

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, but I'm playing 'what if' with a combination of Midnight Sun/Twilight and my own imagination._

_Hope you like it!_

_Thanks to Connie for her help … _

**Songlines**

**Ch12**

Bella was quiet on the drive home, her eyes distant as she gazed out of the passenger window.

"Having second thoughts?" I ventured after a momentary lull in Alice's conversation.

"Hmm?" Bella blinked as she glanced over at me. "No, not really," she rubbed her hands on her jeans, "but what if they don't like me?"

"Seriously?" I felt my eyebrows go up in surprise at this. "So even though I'm taking you home to a house full of vampires, you're worried they might not like you?"

"Bella," Alice leaned forward between the two front seats, "you don't have to worry about a thing. You already know Carlisle, Esme is going to love you, and Jasper-," she broke off and shot me a brief look, "is going to snack on the way home."

"Snack?" Bella twisted in her seat so that she could stare at Alice.

"Hunt," I clarified.

"Ah," Bella nodded, "is that because he's the, uh-," she looked a little flustered and I could detect a faint trace of salt in her scent now. A jolt of fear, not a big one but enough to give her a wake-up call to the situation.

"He's the newest vegetarian," I nodded, "yes."

"What about you, Alice?" Bella turned to my sister who was following the conversation closely.

"Never touched a drop," Alice said with a tinge of pride in her voice. I couldn't help but smile at her choice of words; she sounded like a teetotaller, which I suppose she really was.

"Never? But how did you start out?" Bella was calming down as her curiosity propelling her deeper into the conversation. She twisted a little further in her seat and adjusted the seatbelt so that it didn't cut into her shoulder so much as she nodded for Alice to continue.

"I don't actually remember much," Alice frowned, "nothing of my human life. All I know is that I woke up somewhere outdoors, my throat was burning and-," she waved a hand and gave an apologetic shrug.

"And what?"

"Deer," Alice sighed. "There were deer nearby. I caught their scent and was onto them before I knew what I was doing."

"Like I said, we _hunt_," I murmured to Bella who acknowledged my words with an impatient nod.

"And after that? What about later when you were thirsty? You must have been around humans sometimes," Bella pressed, wanting to know more. It seemed we shared an insatiable thirst, albeit hers was for knowledge.

"I was," Alice nodded, "but I'd already seen Carlisle and knew where I had to be, what lifestyle I was going to choose. It made sense to start as I meant to go on so that when I found my family I'd fit right in."

"You saw Carlisle?" Bella cocked her head at this, "I'm not sure I understand."

"Alice has visions," I explained after getting a quick nod from Alice to explain the situation to the curious human in our midst. "Subjective but highly effective all the same."

Bella nodded slowly at this, her expression thoughtful. "How effective?"

Alice held Bella's gaze for a long moment and then gave a slow smile.

Bella took a moment to assimilate the hint. "You mean you saw me coming?"

"Something like that," Alice nodded, "although the future can change from one instant to the next. Any decision you make can change your future. This one here," a nod of her head indicated myself, "is very hard to read lately," she shook her head sorrowfully at Bella. "He's quite indecisive."

"But not when it matters," I countered.

Alice had to nod at this.

"Am I missing something?" Bella was looking at the two of us trying to follow a conversation that remained largely unspoken.

"Not today, but a few weeks ago you nearly missed everything," Alice said.

Bella shrugged, still mystified as to what was going on.

"Your scent," I explained, "you know how we talked about how it's so-," I stuttered now, trying to find the right adjective without being too obvious about it.

"Appetising?" Bella suggested, cocking her head as she smiled at me. Again I wondered how she could be so cavalier about it.

_She's curious, Edward,_ Alice offered her silent commentary, _fascinated, even. That's driving her beyond anything else, and can you blame her?_

I gave a minute shake of my head to answer my sister before giving Bella an exasperated look.

"Enough with the food similes," I said in a firm tone.

"Sorry," Bella grinned, unrepentant, "please continue."

"Let's just say that you're incredibly lucky that I caught your scent when you were out in public."

"Ah," Bella caught her lower lip between her teeth and looked thoughtful, making me hope that perhaps I was getting through to her at last. For someone so fragile, her survival instinct was minimal at best. Perhaps soon she would see sense and avoid us, although my chest clenched with misery at the thought.

We were nearly home and I began to slow down. Bella heard the shift in gears and turned to look at the road.

"We're here?" she asked as she looked over at me, "but I don't see anything."

"That's the plan," Alice nodded as she reached over to point over to the left hand side of the road.

If you knew what you were looking for the turnoff was perfectly obvious. A slight gap in the trees and undergrowth revealed the smooth dirt track that curled away from the roadside and into the thick cover of trees.

"It's like a Trompe l'Oeil painting," Bella commented. She turned in her seat to peer out the back window of the car, nodding to herself as the road disappeared from sight almost instantly.

"Just another way of keeping things on the down low," Alice replied. "It's too hard to be entirely invisible in society but at least this keeps us off the radar to passers by."

"I can see how that would be useful," Bella nodded, leaning forward in her seat as she peered through the windscreen to catch her first glimpse of the house.

I was watching her carefully to see her reaction when we rounded the final curve and I wasn't disappointed. Bella's face was a picture when she saw the house. A vision of contemporary architecture, it blended and complimented its natural setting beautifully in shifting panels of wood, steel and tempered glass.

"Wow," she breathed, "so no family crypt then."

I swallowed down a bark of laughter.

"No crypt," I agreed in a solemn tone.

"No dungeons, no moats," Alice said as she patted Bella's shoulder in a sympathetic manner. "You okay with that? It must be a terrible letdown."

"Oh I'll live," Bella replied in an equally droll tone. "Unless you told the folks you'd bring something home for dinner."

I felt my mouth drop open in shock as I gaped at Bella who was obviously trying not to laugh.

"Kidding," she said in a meek tone. It had never occurred to me that Bella would use humour to diffuse any tension or fear, and she had picked an interesting time to reveal that particular habit. Alice giggled behind us.

* * * * *

Opening the door I stood aside with a slight bow as Alice ushered Bella inside. _Relax, she'll be fine_, Alice assured me as she helped Bella off with her overcoat and scarf, fluttering about her, aglow with excitement. Alice still managed to keep her visions from me, but looking at her expression I could see that this particular moment was one that she had been anticipating for some time.

"It's gorgeous," Bella said as she peeled off her gloves and stuffed them into her coat pocket. Alice spirited the coat away as Bella turned towards me. The foyer was spacious, dominated only by the staircase that led to the upper level and the floor to ceiling glass. "So much light and space," she gazed at her surroundings and then smiled at me, "Beautiful."

"Welcome," I smiled at her as I reached out to take her hand. I could hear the sounds of industry coming from the kitchen and gave a slight grimace. "I told Esme not to over-do things, but she can't help herself," I explained as I led her forward to the kitchen, Alice following with a barely suppressed squeak as she saw something that she was not prepared to share.

Entering the kitchen I saw that my careful words of caution to Esme had been for naught. It looked like the produce section of the local grocery store had exploded across the counter in a dazzling array of food. Esme looked up from her chopping and beamed. It had been over eighty years since she had prepared a meal but she obviously hadn't lost the knack.

"Edward, you're home," she said with a warm smile as she stepped out from behind the counter wiping her hands on the apron she had tied around her waist to protect her skirt.

"Bella," I leaned towards her slightly as I spoke, my breath washing over her face. I saw her features slacken slightly and remembered to pull away. I didn't want her experience to be dulled by any more pheromones than were necessary. "I'd like you to meet Esme, my mother for all intents and purposes."

"Esme," Bella offered a shy smile. The teasing, self-assured woman in the car was gone now, and I found myself missing her. "You have a lovely home."

"Thank you," Esme hesitated for the barest fraction of a moment before stepping forward and clasping Bella's warm hands in her cool ones.

"Oh," Bella looked surprised, "your hands are cool, like Edwards, I didn't expect-," she gave an embarrassed laugh.

Esme's smile faltered before it recovered.

"It's a family trait," she commented, "are you alright? I didn't mean to startle you."

"I'm fine," now it was Bella who rushed to reassure, "I guess I'm still trying to get my head around all this."

"You're being very brave," Esme patted Bella's hands soothingly and then strolled behind the counter.

"Do I need to be?" Bella followed, taking up a position at the bench opposite Esme, "Brave, I mean." I had remained near the doorway and Bella looked over at me. "Edward has told me about your lifestyle choice, I know he won't hurt me."

"Like I said, brave," Esme murmured. "You're right of course, Bella. None of us here will hurt you but it's quite a leap of faith on your part nonetheless."

"Right," Bella nodded as she chewed her lip, looking thoughtful before blinking and looking at the food on the counter.

"I may have gone a little overboard," Esme explained with a slight smile, "but I thought you might be hungry later."

"That's very thoughtful," Bella nodded, "but I don't want you to go to any-,"

"It's no trouble at all," Esme smiled as she began chopping again.

"You've given us an excuse to use the kitchen for the first time," Carlisle appeared in the doorway behind me and stood smiling as Bella turned around at the sound of his voice.

"Dr Cullen," she beamed. The sight of a familiar face had her on firmer ground. "It's good to see you again."

"Please, call me Carlisle," he clapped me on the back in a gesture of camaraderie as he stepped forward to gently shake Bella's hand.

Bella smiled as Carlisle moved behind the kitchen counter to press a loving kiss against Esme's temple before peering over her shoulder to inspect her work in progress.

"Darling, I don't know what you're making but isn't that a little too much?"

"I know," Esme admitted with a chagrined sigh. "I'm out of practice."

"What are you making?" Bella asked as she leaned against the counter. Esme's slight embarrassment in the face of Carlisle's gentle teasing had broken any social awkwardness.

"Vegetarian moustache," Esme answered as she glanced at the cookbook that had been carefully set to one side.

"Ohh, I haven't tried that, may I?" Bella gestured towards the book.

"Be my guest," Esme smiled.

Bella picked up the book and scanned the page before glancing at the pots and pans that Esme was hovering over.

"It sounds wonderful," Bella said as she finished reading, "and from what I can tell the leftovers will be okay to freeze." She offered Esme a genuine smile of pleasure. "My room-mate and I won't have to cook for a week so as far as I'm concerned you're wonderful."

"Anytime," Esme's answering smile was grateful. "It won't be ready for a while, and it will keep if you're not hungry just yet. Edward," she turned to look at me, "why don't you show Bella the rest of the house?"

I raised an eyebrow at Bella who had paused, caught red-handed in the act of swiping a taste of the sauce with her forefinger.

"Mmph?" she swallowed hastily and nodded. "Excuse me, I couldn't help it."

"I'm flattered and I have to say a little relieved," Esme nodded. "I'm following the recipe exactly but it's hard for me to tell if it's good."

"Oh it's _good,_" Bella assured her, dipping in again for another taste, "thank you so much."

"Shall we?" I held out a hand to Bella who, after a quick pause to wipe her hands on the dishcloth Esme handed her, took it and followed me out of the room. I looked over my shoulder to see Esme hugging Carlisle out of sheer happiness. Jasper may have been the emotional stabiliser of the house, but Bella seemed to introduce an entirely new element that had until now been lacking.

"Is it really that good?" I asked, curious as we strolled towards the staircase hand in hand.

"Wonderful," Bella assured me, "she can cook for me anytime."

_I'd be happy to_, Esme replied in a way that she knew I would hear. _She's lovely, Edward. I'm so pleased for you._

"I think she'd like that," I replied as we went upstairs. Bella paused half way up to marvel at a collection of masks from various tribes.

"Carlisle's," I answered her look of inquiry, "collected over the years from his travels." We reached the landing and I steered her towards the door at the end of the corridor. I flicked the doorknob and gave it a gentle push so that it swung inwards silently.

"Your room?" Bella gestured towards the open space and with a shy smile stepped inside.

The room featured floor to ceiling glass that offered a panoramic view of the forest that surrounded the house, but that wasn't what had captured Bella's attention. She turned in a slow circle as she took in the bookshelves that were crowded with books and music before glancing at me in mild confusion.

"No bed?"

"No need," I shrugged. "We don't sleep."

"So this is how you fill your time," she murmured as she stepped towards the shelves running her fingers along the spines of books and albums.

"Does it bother you?" I hesitated and then stepped closer.

"No," Bella shook her head, "although I can't help but feel a little sorry for you. The ability to lose yourself in sleep is-," she paused and gave an apologetic shrug, "wonderful."

"I wish I could remember," I admitted in a low voice.

Bella turned and looked at the leather chaise lounge that was set up in a corner of the room. It was an impulse purchase in Italy years ago; low-slung and generously wide it was a beautiful example of 1960s contemporary furniture design. Bella paced towards it and held out her hand.

"C'mere," she said with a soft smile.

There was no resisting her invitation. She took my hand and drew me down onto the chaise, pushing at me gently until I moved with my head against the headrest, taking a seat so that her hips were against mine. I leaned back and watched her with mild puzzlement as she sat and regarded me for what felt like a long time, biting her lip before she seemed to reach a decision. She reached out with hands that trembled only a little and began to unbutton my shirt. I reached up and covered her hand with my own.

"Bella," I cautioned, "we can't do this."

"Can't do what?" she regarded me with hooded eyes, patches of colour blooming high in her cheeks. "Relax Edward, I won't be doing anything out of turn." She gave me an encouraging nod as I slowly released her hand and let her continue. Unbuttoning my shirt to the waist she gently pushed the fabric aside and then leaned down to rest her cheek against my chest.

"Ahh," she sighed. "Close your eyes, Edward," she coaxed, and I obeyed.

Her cheek was a patch of throbbing warmth on my chest that was soon joined by her hand as she began to trace a gentle pattern over my skin with her fingertips. I wondered what her fascination could possibly be. My skin was as hard as marble and just as cold. There would be no heartbeat for her to count and draw comfort from. I was roused from my musings however, as she began to trail hot kisses across my chest slowly making her way up my neck. I closed my eyes and clenched my hands, willing myself not to grab her. I couldn't risk losing control. Not now.

Her warm lips pressed against mine in the softest of kisses, and now it was her scent that washed across my face. I parted my lips, planning on gently dissuading her from progressing any further, and froze when her warm tongue gently skimmed across my lower lip.

I had often wondered over Bella's reaction to any intimacy between us however slight, and now I realised I had been entirely wrong. So much time had been spent worrying about her ephemeral human reactions that I had entirely overlooked my own. Desire shot through me like a bolt as she shifted and squirmed so that she was lying across my chest dusting kisses against my lips and jaw. I raised my hands intending to steer her away to safety but found myself clutching at her as carefully as I could, holding her to me. She made a soft sound of satisfaction as I moved aside to give her more room, all but curling herself around me like a kitten as she stroked my face with her hands.

Lifting her face from mine she regarded my face for a long time. I gazed back at her in silence as I tried to make sense of the situation. Her heartbeat was drumming loudly against her chest and her lips were swollen with the blood that her arousal had flooded through her extremities. I swallowed hard and, exercising monumental restraint reached up to trace the line of her jaw with my fingers. Holding her when I could feel my own arousal snarling for release was like trying to protect a dandelion in a high gale. She was aware of what I was, she had seen James and had caught a glimpse of the dangers that associating with me would bring, and yet still she remained.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" she murmured as she settled against my chest with her chin on her hands.

"I could say the same of you," I replied.

She wriggled closer and when her gaze dipped I reached up to tip her face upwards again and guide her lips towards my own.

I didn't know why she was here or why she was so accepting but somehow it didn't matter any more.

* * * * *

Bella set her fork back on the plate with a sigh of repletion and dabbed at her lips with her napkin.

"Esme," she began as she picked up her plate and carried it towards the sink, "for someone that thinks she's out of practice that was _incredible_."

"Really?" Esme beamed with delight at the praise.

"I'm not kidding," Bella said over her shoulder as she rinsed her plate, "feel free to cook for me anytime."

"Why thank you, Bella," Esme nodded, "I think I will."

"Careful," I whispered into Bella's ear, having moved to stand behind her at the sink, "you may have created a monster."

"Edward," Esme chided, "my hearing is just as good as yours."

"Hey," Bella nudged me with her rump, "you apologise to Esme right now, if she's going to be feeding me then I'm in her corner for this argument."

"Sorry," I gave Esme a repentant look followed by a wink that made Esme's smile grow even wider if that were possible. Her thoughts were jumping from one subject to the next as she left the room but the underlying theme remained the same, however disjointed. _Bella … so happy … he's smiling._

Bella set the plate on the rack to dry and leaned back into my chest with a quiet hum as I slid my arms around her waist and we stood staring out of the large window. We had spent the afternoon in my room talking. That is to say she peppered me with questions and I answered.

* * * * *

"What was it like?" she had asked, "Becoming … you know."

"Excruciating," I replied at once. "I don't remember much except the pain."

"Really?" Bella was fascinated despite the unsavoury topic that was my human death. "I thought … well in all the movies the girls would get bit and fall into a kind of swoon. It wasn't like that?"

"No," I gave her a wry smile, "it wasn't like that. For starters it was Carlisle that changed me so there was nothing erotic about it, and secondly-," I paused and blinked, "actually the swooning part could be right. I was already dying after all."

Bella shook with laughter in my arms. "Go on," she encouraged.

"Well," I frowned now. Perfect recall notwithstanding my fading human memories from that particular time of my life were hazy at best. "He spoke just before he-," I paused and swallowed again. Bella's scent was growing headier the more time we spent together, the musk of her arousal repeatedly battering at my resistance.

"What did he say?" Bella shifted closer still and I saw her waver, torn between wanting to kiss me again and wanting me to continue the story. Either way, I had no objections.

"He apologised," I said on a sigh.

"Really? Why was that?" Bella hand floated up to trace my lower lip as I spoke. The lightest of touches but it was enough to have me choking back venom again. I reached up to grasp her hand to stop it.

"You're really not making this easy for me, have you got a death wish or something?"

"Sorry," Bella bit her lip as she flushed with embarrassment, "I can't help it."

"Don't be," I assured her, "I like it, but it's just difficult sometimes."

"Okay I'll behave," Bella snuggled beside me with her head nuzzling my neck, "but keep telling me the story. Why did he apologise?"

"I was the first person he changed," I said after pausing to close my eyes in pleasure at the feel of Bella's warm breath against my neck. "I think he felt sorry for the life he was giving me. It was a Catch-22 I suppose. On the one hand he was saving me from death but on the other he felt he was condemning me to a different type of existence entirely. He didn't know if he was doing the right thing or making the right choice, but-," my voice trailed off as Bella pressed her lips against my skin.

"But here you are," she breathed. "I'm glad."

"I am too," I said, and realised I meant it.

* * * * *

"It's getting dark," Bella said as she looked out of the window and I returned my attention to the landscape outside.

"Would you like to go outside?" I suggested, "if it's not too cold for you of course."

"I think I'd like that," Bella agreed as she turned in my arms to give me a quick kiss. "I'll just find my coat."

_Edward, I've left a cashmere shawl outside on a chair for her, and Esme switched on the gas heaters earlier._

"No need," I said smoothly, "Alice has taken care of things."

"She has? But how did she-," Bella broke off and grinned. "Wow, so that whole foresight thing really works, but how did you know?"

I tapped my temple with one hand, watching as she laughed and took the hand I extended in invitation to lead her outside. The porch ran the width of the house at the back and as we stepped outside I could see that Alice had everything well in hand. There was an oversize wrap draped artfully over the back of one of the outdoor lounges, and several pillar candles had been lit and set in glass vases. The overhead gas heaters installed by the previous owners had been activated, making the immediate area glow with warmth.

"Wow," Bella said in an impressed tone. "This looks really romantic," she paused and gave me an impish grin, "no pressure."

"Do I look worried?" I replied, surprised to hear the teasing tone in my voice as I backed her towards the lounge and watched her wind the wrap around her shoulders before leaning against my side.

_Edward._

I looked up at the call of my name towards the tree line.

"Jasper?" I answered in my usual speaking tone.

"What?" Bella looked at me in puzzlement and then followed my gaze although she could see nothing.

_I'm fine,_ he assured me, _I've eaten well. I just wanted to let you know I was nearly home._

Alice appeared on the porch and sat on the top step to wait.

"Any minute now," she said with satisfaction.

True to her word, Jasper appeared from the trees walking at a relaxed pace. His body language seemed peaceful. Sated might have been a better term for it, but I knew how hard he was working to resist the human that sat at my side. I scanned his thoughts rapidly and could feel the flashes of panic that ran through his mind as a stray breeze carried Bella's scent towards him.

"Relax, honey," Alice replied in a soft voice, too soft for Bella to hear. "You won't hurt her. I've seen it."

"If you say so," Jasper replied just as quietly as he paced across the back lawn towards the steps. Climbing them slowly he opened his arms so that Alice could stand up and step into his embrace. They didn't kiss. Displays of public affection were rare for them but the intensity of their mutual regard made it feel as if we were intruding on an incredibly private moment. He looked over Alice's shoulder to offer a quiet smile to the woman beside me.

"Hey, Bella," he offered.

"Hey Jasper," she replied, "good hunting?"

He blinked at her easy greeting. "It was … enough," he allowed cautiously as Alice tucked her head beneath his chin and cuddled him.

_It's all right, Edward, everything's all right, I'll keep looking. I promise,_ Alice chanted in my head.

I settled back in the seat as Bella gave me a questioning look.

"Bella," Alice turned suddenly, "it's cold out here can I get you a warm drink? Esme has all the fixings inside," she added with a quick smile.

_You should've seen her in the store, Edward. I don't think I've seen her that excited for a long time._

"I don't doubt it," I answered dryly.

"That could be great, thank you," Bella nodded. "Whatever you think would be nice is fine by me."

"Edward, come and help?" Alice extended a hand towards me as I froze. Leave Bella with Jasper? What the hell was she thinking?

"I'll be fine, Edward," Jasper nodded once before giving Bella a quick grin, "just sit still and don't cut yourself on anything, okay?"

"You've got yourself a deal," Bella replied as she sank back into the cushions, tucking her legs up and tucking the wrap around her to keep warm.

"C'mon," Alice gestured impatiently at me, "I don't know much about drinks these days but I'm thinking chocolate never goes out of style."

"I like the way you think," Bella countered with a laugh.

Alice pulled and pushed me back into the house against my quiet protestations. I could have refused of course, but Alice had given me a pleading look, compelling me to cooperate against my better judgement.

"I hope you know what you're doing," I whispered to Alice as she held my hand and tugged me towards the kitchen, "you've just left an alcoholic alone in a bar."

"He'll be fine," Alice assured me as she began to fill the kettle. "They need to have a talk, I've seen it."

"You and your _I've seen it_ comments," I muttered, feeling mulish now that she had taken me away from Bella's side.

"For someone that has access to everyone's thoughts you get kinda pissed when you're shut out," Alice commented as she tried to negotiate the oven gas top, snatching her hand away when she nearly snapped the knob off by mistake.

"Allow me," Esme said as she appeared at Alice's side. "I've think I'm getting the hang of it now." She lit the gas top with ease and slid the kettle over to start the water boiling. "What are we making?"

"Hot chocolate," Alice replied in a meek voice, "thank you, Esme."

"My pleasure," Esme said as she opened a cupboard to retrieve a small tin of Lindt drinking chocolate. "It's been a long time since I've had a chance to play mother."

"Hello?" Alice squeaked, "I'm standing right _here_."

Esme patted her face with a fond smile, "You know what I mean."

The two women put their heads together as they read the preparation instructions on the back of the tin, the intensity of their gaze far outweighing the task at hand.

I left them to it and prowled silently towards the back of the house. I trusted Jasper, but these were special circumstances. Unique.

* * * * *

Jasper was leaning against the balustrade that ran around the porch gazing out into the night as he and Bella made small talk.

_I'm fine, Edward_, he sent as he heard my approach. _Feel free to join us, or stay inside, it's your call._

I hesitated at this. Alice had wanted them to have some time, and so long as she could see no problems perhaps I would resist the temptation to claim Bella's attention for myself. I remained inside, but close to the door as I listened.

Bella had said little at first and then had tentatively taken the first steps towards questioning him as she had with me.

"How long has it been for you, Jasper?"

"Since …?" he raised an eyebrow at her, making her laugh.

"Since you were changed," she clarified.

"Ah," he nodded, "I was changed in 1863."

"1863 that's … wow," Bella said in a weak voice then, "wait, so that means you were around for the Civil War."

"More than around, as you put it," Jasper corrected with a soft voice, "I fought with the Confederates until my-," he paused.

"Untimely demise?" Bella suggested.

"Something like that," he agreed.

"What was it like, the war I mean," Bella asked. I smiled at the curiosity I could hear in her voice. She seemed to have an insatiable thirst for knowledge.

"Hard, challenging, brutal … inspiring," Jasper said after a long pause. "Serving in the army was something I seemed to have a calling for. My Mama always said I had charisma, and my way with people accelerated my military career. When I died at the hands of others I was Major Jasper Whitlock, aged 20."

"So young," Bella whispered.

"Not then," Jasper countered, "I had the kinds of responsibilities that a twenty year old today would have no experience with but it was typical for the time."

"I bet," Bella agreed. "When you … did you … were you hurt? Is that how it happened? Did someone find you, like Carlisle found Edward?"

"No," Jasper sighed, "I was hunted. I didn't know it at the time, but I had been noticed on the battlefield and one night they were lying in wait for me."

"They?"

"Three of them," Jasper replied, "three women. Maria was the one that changed me, and I served her for a long time after that."

"That was when your diet was … other than it is now, right?"

"Right," Jasper agreed. "It was a dark time for me, but at the time I didn't know any better." Another sigh, "I think I even thrived on it."

"Really?" Bella's voice was quieter now. I stepped closer to the door, pausing when Jasper continued.

"I wasn't human any more, and once the war was over I didn't even have that."

"Have?"

"For a time I kept fighting for the Confederates," Jasper replied, "just not in a way that they ever knew of. It was a way for me to satisfy my appetite and strike a blow against the Yankees," he admitted.

"You must've kept it on the down low, I've never read anything like that in the history books."

Jasper gave a mirthless laugh. "Oh I was good," he agreed. "Maria pulled me back into service once the war ended, so she could set about making an army of her own."

"God, every time I think I've got a handle on this situation something surprises me," Bella muttered. "Vampire armies now?"

"Perhaps that's for another time," Jasper suggested, "you've had enough surprises lately."

"Perhaps," she agreed. There was a long silence between the two of them, but it seemed untroubled. Jasper's thoughts were still relatively calm and he sat watching her – my Bella – as she mulled over all that he had told her.

"Your experiences of the war," Bella murmured after a while, "you should write them down."

"I have," Jasper replied, "extensively."

"Why don't you publish?"

"Too risky," Jasper countered. "It's the kind of paper trail I don't want to leave behind."

"I don't know what to say," Bella said after a thoughtful silence, "I mean, this could be a great opportunity for you to set the records straight. You were there after all, that gives you a unique perspective."

Jasper gave her a tired smile. "History's always written by the winners, ever notice that? And besides," Jasper turned and stared out to the forest, "the past is like a foreign country to me now."

"But not forgotten," Bella prompted.

"No," Jasper gave a slow nod, "never forgotten."

"Then I'm sorry," Bella hesitated and then went on, "Major Whitlock."

Jasper gave a low chuckle at that but his amusement didn't conceal the weary slump of his shoulders.

"The war was a long time ago, Bella," he said, "those of us that were there are just folk now."

"You miss it don't you," Bella replied.

"Sometimes," Jasper admitted, and I could hear his surprise.

"Being in the military from such a young age, with that level of responsibility … it would have given you a strong sense of purpose. Even afterwards, you still had a defined purpose with the others until you decided to leave."

Alice appeared silently at my elbow with a steaming mug in her hands, waiting beside me for when the time was right to intrude on the quiet conversation outside.

"True," Jasper agreed. "When I left them I drifted for a long time. I had to avoid people as much as I could until, well – you know," he said with an apologetic tone.

"You had to eat," Bella soothed, "and that was a long time ago now. So then what happened?"

"I met Alice," Jasper replied.

Alice gave me a nudge and I stepped outside and resumed my seat. Bella blinked up at me and gave me a broad smile of welcome as she waited for me to settle before snuggling back against me. Alice followed bearing the mug which she handed over with all due ceremony.

"Thanks, Alice," Bella said as she clasped the mug with both hands and took a careful sip. I could smell the change in her blood as the hot liquid warmed her throat. Delicious. "So go on," she encouraged Jasper, "you met Alice how?"

"I found my way into a diner one day, I don't know what the hell I was doing there," Jasper replied, smiling as Alice wormed her way back into his embrace. "And there she was sitting at a booth all by herself. I stood there in the doorway for a while not knowing that I was going to do and then she stood up and walked towards me," he looked down at his mate with a look of such adoration that I blinked and looked away. "She took my hands and said-,"

"You've kept me waiting a long time," Alice finished for him with a smile. "And then you stood there like the Southern gentleman you are, and you ducked your head and said-,"

"I'm sorry, Ma'am."

Bella sighed as she gazed at the two of them. "Beautiful."

"Yes," I agreed as I brushed a kiss against her temple, "you are."


	13. Chapter 13

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I'm just a very happy textual poacher playing 'what if'._

**Songlines Ch13**

We sat outside talking a while longer until Bella shifted her weight against me with a quiet sigh. I knew that sound: she was getting tired.

"Hey," I whispered, my lips brushing her temple, "you need to get some sleep. I should take you home."

"Don' wanna," Bella slurred, "it's inter'esting."

Alice gave a quiet gurgle of laughter.

Bella shifted again and lifted her head from my shoulder to give Alice a gimlet stare before looking up at me. I obligingly pulled her closer but that wasn't enough. Grumbling under her breath Bella patted at my chest to push me back against the seat cushions and crawled onto my lap, settling with a quiet smile.

_Guess she's a woman who knows what she wants_. Even Jasper's mental tone was flavoured with amusement. _Good luck with that one._

I raised an eyebrow at him as Bella curled a hand around my neck and settled herself with her lips at my throat. Her breath huffed against my skin once, twice and then settled into an easy rhythm that told me she had gone to sleep. I settled her more comfortably against me and looked up to see Alice and Jasper regarding the two of us with what seemed to be fascination.

"That can't be comfortable," Alice remarked after we had sat there watching Bella, "she's going to wake up feeling like she slept on stone."

"Still," Jasper marvelled, "just look at her. So much trust."

I nodded, careful not to disturb the sleeping woman in my arms. Jasper seemed curiously invigorated and peaceful after his brief conversation with Bella, and it seemed the more he got to know her, the less inclined he was to regard her as a threat. Perhaps the temptation of her blood would also fade over time. I could only hope.

"Can you remember what it was like?" Alice asked Jasper, not taking her eyes off Bella.

There was a careful pause as Jasper considered the question. "No," he sighed at last.

"Neither can I," Alice admitted. She reached out without looking for Jasper's hand only to discover that he was reaching for hers. They sat hand in hand; Jasper's thumb drawing lazy circles on Alice's skin, both unable to look away from Bella. "Is she waking up?" Alice leaned forward a little in her seat, "her eyelids are flickering."

I couldn't see Bella's face but her steady breathing and heartbeat remained the same.

"She's dreaming," I whispered.

"Ah," Alice nodded. Now Jasper leaned forward to watch, just as fascinated as his mate. "Can you see them? Her dreams?"

"No," I whispered again, and could hear the regret in my voice.

"I wonder what she sees," Jasper cocked his head as he watched Bella's eyelashes flutter against her cheek.

"I wonder what it's like," Alice commented, and I was surprised at the depth of longing in her voice.

"What about your visions, isn't that the same thing?" I asked, grateful for our enhanced hearing that made it possible to hold a conversation that wouldn't disrupt Bella. Even so, we found ourselves whispering out of courtesy.

"They belong to everyone else," Alice shrugged, "but dreams are your own."

"Hey," Carlisle appeared in the doorway and the three of us looked up to see him regarding Bella with what appeared to be disappointment. "Oh, she's asleep. I suppose it's later for her than I thought. I was hoping to spend some time with you like everyone else has this evening."

"You'll get your turn," Alice said as she looked back at Bella with considerable satisfaction.

"Care to sit with us a spell?" Jasper waved Carlisle towards one of the spare lounges on the porch.

"Don't mind if I do," Carlisle flashed a quick smile as he sank onto the lounge. "Esme will no doubt join us soon."

True to his word, Esme appeared moments later carrying a spare shawl. "In case she gets cold," she explained as she draped it onto the seat next to me.

"The heaters are on," I objected, "and she's wrapped up."

"Even so, you're only as warm as the ambient temperature of your surroundings," Carlisle noted. "If she starts to shiver you'll need something between the two of you to get her temperature back up."

Esme paused at my side and reached down towards Bella's face and had she needed to air she would have been holding her breath at this moment. Moving carefully she gently moved some hair off her Bella's with her fingertips.

"Ah," she sighed as she looked at me in wonder, "so warm." Stepping back she took her seat beside Carlisle, soundlessly taking off her shoes so that she could sit with her legs curled beneath her. Carlisle reached out and gathered her to his side, pressing a kiss against her cheek. Esme submitted to his affection with a slight smile, but her gaze didn't waver from Bella's sleeping form.

For decades, centuries even, our family had witnessed countless wonders. All that we had seen paled into insignificance compared to the sight of a fragile human sleeping in my arms. I wanted to hold her closer, to shield her from their scrutiny, but I knew that their interest in her was only marginally less than my own and I could not find it in my heart to deny them.

"We'll go if she starts to wake up," Jasper said in a quiet voice, having sensed my conflicting emotions. "I wouldn't want her embarrassed."

"Not at all," Esme concurred. She rested her head on Carlisle's shoulder and gave a slow smile. "I remember watching my baby sleep like that, utterly relaxed, completely at peace." Her gaze shifted and I closed my eyes against the flashes of blurred memories of a gurgling baby, all pink cheeks and toothless gums. She blinked and the visions began to recede. Now I could see Bella though their eyes and could appreciate anew the charming picture she presented. Her lips and cheeks were flushed with sleep, her muffled heartbeat a comforting drum against the faint noises of the evening.

"Emmett and Rosalie will be here soon," Alice ventured after an hour of silence.

"Now that's going to be interesting," Jasper added in a thoughtful voice.

"Mm-hmm," Alice nodded, her gaze turned inward where he could not follow, "but manageable. Emmett will help."

"You think?" Jasper looked sceptical at this.

"He likes Bella," Alice reasoned in a placid tone.

"Emmett likes everyone," Esme smiled, "that's his gift."

Esme had a point. I couldn't think of anyone that could resist Emmett's open-faced charm; the man didn't have an ounce of guile in him. Those who discovered otherwise were the ones who threatened the happiness of those he loved. It seemed that Emmett's protection had extended towards Bella by default which made me hopeful that Rosalie would be a little less … challenging.

"Don't be too hard on her," Carlisle remonstrated, "she means well." As ever Carlisle was determined to see the best in people. Centuries of repairing the damage that humans had done to each other in the name of love and hate had not cured his eternal optimism.

Alice blinked; a sure sign that she was biting her tongue at this. Esme glanced over at her and shook her head in amused resignation.

Bella shifted in my arms and after a moment moved again with a quiet grumble.

"She's waking up," Jasper observed.

"Should we go?" Esme glanced from Bella to me as she hesitated.

"Yes," Alice said with a decisive nod. "She'll want to come inside soon and Emmett and Rosalie will be here soon."

"Great," I muttered sotto voce, knowing full well Esme could hear me.

"Rosalie will be fine," Alice soothed. _Well, as much as she can be. Bella can take care of herself._

"Easy, Edward," Carlisle soothed. "I think you'll find that Bella will surprise us all." He stood up and held out his hand to Esme who took it after giving Bella another regretful look. "Another time," he soothed as he led her inside.

Jasper shifted in his seat but stopped as Alice paused.

"Just a little longer," she said as he reached out for her. Jasper subsided immediately and I realised he was just as reluctant to leave as Alice was. Again I marvelled that such a simple moment in time could keep vampires enraptured. Still, perhaps it wasn't such a simple moment; it was after all Bella that I held in my arms, a human like no other that we had encountered in decades.

At last Bella's breathing began to quicken as she shifted in my arms again.

"All right," Alice said as she allowed Jasper to pull her to her feet. "She'll be awake in another minute."

"I know," I replied, not looking away from Bella. "I can hear it." Her heartbeat had increased slightly as her body began to stir back to wakefulness. Bella turned to nuzzle against my neck as she began to wake up. Her scent puffed as she gave a small yawn and licked her lips as she shifted her head to gaze up at me.

"You let me fall asleep?" her tone was accusatory, "What did I miss?"

"I don't know that I had much say in it," I explained, unable to help my smile as she blinked sleepily at me. Her face was still flushed with sleep but her gaze began to sharpen as she shot a look over at the now vacant chairs.

"Emmett and Rosalie are inside," I commented, "you met Emmett when he-," I paused and shrugged. "You've met him."

"I remember," Bella commented in a dry tone. "How long was I asleep for?" To my immense regret she began to squirm on my lap. I thought it was because she wanted to get up, but to my quiet delight she simply pulled herself into a more upright position rather than remaining cradled in my arms. I automatically adjusted my grip, noticing that she winced a little as my arms moved around her.

"A few hours," I replied, "are you hurt?"

Bella twisted so that she could look at me and I could see her bemused smile. "I feel a little stiff," she admitted, "maybe I should stretch a few kinks out."

I got the hint and slackened my grip so that she could slip off my lap and stood standing beside me. She twisted her upper body from side to side and rolled her neck a few times, giving a quiet grunt as the tendons in her neck gave a quiet 'pop'. Bending forward to let her head hang down so that she was grasping her ankles.

"Don't mind me," her voice was muffled, "it just feels good to stretch."

"I'm sorry," I instantly regretted having held her for so long. Alice had been right and I had caused Bella pain, "I should have made sure you were more comfortable."

"Don't be silly," Bella retorted, "this is no worse than when Angela convinced me to sleep on her futon for a night to see what it was like." Straightening up she gave me a quick smile and then rolled her shoulders in a quick semi-circle.

"And?" I couldn't help but ask the question. Bella seemed to be remarkably easy about the situation.

"The next morning I creaked and cracked so much that I sounded like a human castanet," Bella answered. "I vowed right there and then that I would never sleep on something that uncomfortable again."

"Right," I commented unhappily as I processed her words, "duly noted."

"Hey," Bella moved so that she was standing between my knees and then braced her hands on my shoulders, "you're the exception to the rule."

"I can't think why," I muttered.

"Then you're thinking too much," Bella replied, and before I could ask her what she was talking about she leaned down to kiss me. Her warm lips moved over my cool ones and for the time being my doubts and questions didn't matter. All that mattered was Bella.

_Edward,_ Alice's mental voice was hesitant, _it's late for Bella and Angela is going to be worried if she isn't home soon._ I grimaced at the idea of Bella leaving but it had to be done. With the exception of Carlisle, Bella was the only person with connections and responsibilities to the outside world. I got to my feet, watching as Bella stood her ground, gazing up as I towered over her before she reached up and placed her hands on my chest.

"Bella," I began, feeling awkward. How to tell the woman I loved that it was time for her to go? "Alice just said that-," I stopped as Bella blanched and scrabbled at her shirt sleeve, pushing it up to reveal her delicate wristwatch.

"Crap," she swore, "it's later than I realised."

I was shocked. Modern sensibilities notwithstanding I was yet to grow accustomed to the blunt speech I heard from women these days, Bella included.

"Sorry," Bella ran a hand through her hair, chewing her lip as she thought. "I know, I'll.-," she stopped as Alice breezed out onto the porch and handed Bella her cell phone before returning inside without another word. "Wow," Bella glanced at phone and then looked up at me, "tell me she buys lottery tickets on occasion."

I choked back a laugh. "That would be more attention than we're prepared to deal with," I replied in a grave tone.

"Right," Bella nodded as she gave this some thought with a slight grin. "Hey, Alice," she said in a slightly louder conversational tone, "you know my birthday's in a few months."

_Tell her I'm open to negotiation_, Alice's reply was swift and tinged with amusement.

"She said she'll think about it."

"Sweet," Bella mumbled as she began typing out a text message to her room-mate. "All I need is a new pair of Converse."

_I think we can do better than that_, Alice's tone was indignant this time, and I managed to glimpse an array of colours in Alice's mind before she locked me out. I rubbed my upper lip with my forefinger in a bid to hide my amusement. Alice had been infatuated with Bella from the start – before the start if I was going to be honest – but Bella had unwittingly given my sister permission to take things to a new level. I wondered if she had any inkling as to what she had unleashed.

Bella sent the message and smiled up at me again as she pocketed her phone. "I told her I was going to be home late," she explained, "so there's no rush."

"It's late now," I warned, "so you'll be tired tomorrow."

"So I'll sleep then," Bella shrugged.

"And waste what Alice tells me is going to be a beautiful day? I think not," I shook my head at her with a smile.

"Fine," Bella sighed, "I suppose I'll let you take me home." She looked for her empty cup and raised an eyebrow at me when she saw the small side table was empty.

"Esme," I answered.

"I should thank her again for dinner," Bella turned to enter the house, jumping as I appeared in front of her to hold the door open.

"Can you always move that fast?"

"Faster," I grinned.

"You'll have to show me sometime," Bella commented as I held the door open for her to

"Careful what you wish for," I whispered in her ear as I followed her down the hall to the living room.

Esme looked up from her magazine with a warm smile as Bella approached.

"Edward has told me that I have to go," she began.

"Not so," I protested, "but I don't want you tired tomorrow."

"See?" she turned to Esme with a wink that she thought I didn't catch. "He's so bossy."

"He means well," Esme laughed, "although I have to say I agree, Bella. You do need more sleep."

"I can't believe Edward let me fall asleep like that," Bella blushed a little as she spoke. "Fall asleep in front of my hosts like that is very rude."

"Not at all," Esme waved off her concerns. "You should know by now that we operate on a different set of rules."

"Bella," Carlisle appeared on the landing and smiled down at us before he began walking down the stairs. "I was hoping I would get to see a little more of you before Edward whisked you away."

"Oh, so I'm the bad guy now?" I gave Bella a wry smile.

Our gentle teasing was too much for Esme who immediately got up and stepped to my side to rub my arm reassuringly. I submitted to her motherly concern enough to put an arm around her shoulders as we looked at Bella who was leaning against the back of the sofa happily engaged in conversation with Carlisle. Esme slipped an arm around my waist and rested her head on my shoulder as she gave me a slight squeeze to indicate her pleasure.

_She's wonderful, Edward. I can see why you're so taken with her. _Her mind was a jumble of happy thoughts, and the most common theme was the sight of me smiling and talking with my family, a sleeping Bella held lovingly in my arms.

"There she is."

Bella turned to see Emmett strolling into the living room with a broad smile, Rosalie following at a more cautious distance.

"Bella," he inclined his head, "nice to see you again under more pleasant circumstances."

"Emmett," Bella shifted uneasily and shot me a look that had me stepping closer to her out of sheer reflex.

"Rose," Emmett turned to see Rosalie standing nearby watching Bella with a very measuring gaze. "Play nice," he whispered.

"We'll see," Rosalie answered as she offered Bella thin-lipped smile.

Bella offered a slight smile in return and it seemed as if each woman was determined to be as cautious as the other.

"Bella was just about to leave," I said as I slid my arm around her waist and held her close. "It's getting late and she has classes tomorrow."

"Not us," Rosalie gave Emmett a smug look, "it's so nice to be free from college for a few years."

"I'll know myself soon enough," Bella murmured and then looked at me. "So I'll see you tomorrow?" Bella turned to me and then glanced at Alice who was silently shaking her head. "What?"

"Sorry, Bella," Alice apologised, and I could tell she was, "but the forecast means we won't be on campus tomorrow."

"Forecast?" Bella looked at me in confusion.

"I'll explain later," I soothed.

"Now _that's_ a show and tell I wouldn't mind seeing," Emmett's snicker turned into a full-throated laugh as I shot him an irritated look. Emmett's humour was contagious and I could feel a subtle nudge from Jasper as he lightened the mood in the room. Bella's lips twitched with amusement.

"Right," Bella said slowly as she looked at Emmett who was still shaking with laughter back to me. "I'll hold you to that."

"That's what she said," Emmett said as his laughter increased.

Rosalie shook her head and rubbed his back with one hand to calm him down as she and Bella traded a look of mutual understanding.

"Can you believe I've put up with that sense of humour for eighty years now?" she murmured. She may have been exasperated at Emmett's juvenile sense of humour at times, but she gazed lovingly at her mate.

"Oh, Hells Bells," Emmett said as he began to subside, "I know we've just met but can we keep you? I love seeing Edward rattled like this."

"Hells Bells? Is that what you're calling me now?" Bella cocked an eyebrow at Emmett who gave her an unrepentant grin.

"My monkey man here likes to give people nicknames," Rosalie explained, "but would you prefer Isabella?"

_I'm not saying I like her yet, Edward,_ Rosalie thought at me, _but Emmett's right. She's different._

"Bella's fine," Bella returned swiftly, "but I'm okay with nicknames, as long as it isn't 'Snack' we're good."

Emmett gaped at her for a moment and then gave another whoop of laughter.

_So much laughter, it's been too long_. I glanced over at Esme to see her watching Emmett.

_Told you,_ Jasper commented. _Look at Rosalie. Emmett likes Bella so Rosalie's halfway there already._

"And on that note we're leaving," I sighed as I took Bella's arm and led her towards the door.

"See you tomorrow, Bella," Alice called from her seat on the sofa beside Jasper who was flicking through cable channels.

"See you," Bella replied, "thanks for dinner, Esme."

"Oh wait," Esme disappeared into the kitchen with vampire hast but returned at a more human speed carrying a plastic bag filled with plastic containers. "Your dinner," she explained as she handed it over.

"And lunch, and dinner-," Bella laughed as she took the bag and laughingly hefted it. "Thank you so much."

"Anytime," Esme said, pleased. _Please bring her back tomorrow, Edward. She's wonderful._

"It's later than I thought," Bella yawned as she stepped outside followed by a chorus of 'goodnights' after I had helped her on with her coat. She stood blinking on the porch as I closed the front door behind me and gently took her hand to usher her down the steps towards the car.

"It's after midnight," I added as I held the car door open for her, making sure she was safely inside before closing it carefully. I stowed Esme's cooking in the back before I eased myself into the driver's seat a second later to see Bella settling into her seat and giving me a sleepy smile.

By the time we arrived at her apartment she was practically asleep and I had to brush my cold fingertips across her cheek to wake her up.

"We're here," I said as she blinked at me in confusion, "you fell asleep on the way back."

"I can't believe I did that again," Bella groused as I helped her out of the car, "this is getting embarrassing."

"Not embarrassing, it's human. We don't exactly keep the same hours," I commented as she stood in my embrace looking past me to the front door of her apartment building with something akin to regret before she looked up at me.

"So I won't see you tomorrow?" She looked disappointed at this.

"Not until late afternoon," I replied.

"And you'll show me why?" Bella went on. She wasn't going to give up on the subject; her curiosity was a powerful propellant.

"I will," I nodded.

Bella considered this as she swayed in my arms; her heartbeat was slow and steady.

"Okay," she sighed, "I guess I can live with that. I'll call you tomorrow afternoon then."

"I'll be looking forward to it," I reassured her.

Bella gave me a quick smile and then hesitated.

"What?" I asked.

"It's just," she shifted her weight from one foot to the other and looked down at her hands. "I've been wondering something," she admitted before looking back up at me. I nodded for her to continue. "I keep dreaming about you in my room, why is that?"

I hesitated long enough for Bella to get her answer.

"Oh," she breathed, "so when I was teasing you about being in my room that wasn't actually," a slight flush crept into her cheeks, "it wasn't the first time you've been there, is it?"

"Bella-," I began, trying to work out a way to apologise that would feel less torturous than the moment already did. Then she surprised me.

"It's okay," she shook her head at me to cut off my words, "I'm fine."

"But," I grimaced at her, "you don't find it distasteful?"

"I guess it depends," Bella reached up and began to idly twist a button on my shirt front as she spoke, "on just how far you've been taking it." She gave me a sharp look. "Have you watched me get undressed?"

"What? No!" I replied. My shock that she could think such a thing was genuine.

"Okay then," Bella nodded, "well I'll be honest and say it's weird, but given the situation what's normal anyway?"

"True," I sighed. "I'm sorry, Bella. I just-."

"Will you come up to my room tonight?" Bella asked.

"I-," I paused as I considered the question. Bella's acceptance of my visits, my nature, my family were more than a little daunting. I was beginning to wonder what it would take for her to realise the extraordinary predicament she was in. The slightest miscalculation on my part, the slightest accident on hers could be catastrophic. Not just for my family, but for her life. I considered Bella who stood gazing trustingly up at me and as always my resistance fell to ash. "If you want me."

"I do," she said and went up on tip-toe to give me a quick kiss. "Just give me a few minutes."

* * * * *

After allowing a civilised amount of time for Bella to go about her evening routine I climbed over the windowsill of her room to see her sitting up in bed with an expectant look on her fact.

"You don't make a sound," she marvelled.

"It's why you've never woken up the last few times I've been here," I admitted.

"Right," Bella nodded. "You know, if you were human and I found out you'd been doing this I'd slap a restraining order on you."

"And because I'm not?" I waited for her response and watched as she wound a strand of hair around her finger.

"I guess that means the rules are different," she admitted at last.

"Oh, so there are rules now?" I teased with a smile as I paced towards my chair and sat down.

"Let's call it etiquette," Bella suggested, "I don't know what else to call it. I can't say that I'm very experienced with this kind of situation."

She looked over at where I sat in the chair and then shifted on the bed, patting the bed beside her and nodding at me. I took the hint and got up to sit on the bed beside her. Bella sat up with her legs crossed and reached out for my hand, occupying herself by drawing random circles on my palm with the tip of her finger. The warmth of her regard was soothing and I felt myself relax. She seemed a little more self-conscious than I was used to seeing her, and I wondered if the thought of my nocturnal visits bothered her more than she was prepared to admit.

"You have every right to be angry," I ventured at last.

"I'm not angry," Bella shifted towards me, "I feel like I've just found my guardian angel."

"Some angel," I mumbled.

"I hear they come in all shapes and forms," Bella demurred, "now lie back."

I obeyed and watched as she fussed around, pulling up the quilt so that she would be able to stay warm as she slept against my side, settling against my shoulder and then pushing her pillow until she was comfortable. I lay still, not wanting to disturb her as she began to relax against me and then glanced down as I felt her fingers brush over my shirt, silently un-doing one of the buttons. Bella looked up at me through her lashes.

"Do you mind?" she whispered.

"No," I whispered back.

She returned her attention to my shirt to carefully undo the first three buttons so that she could slip her hand under the cotton. Her warm hand rested on my chest, her fingers curling against my skin. I felt her temperature increase slightly in a way that preceded sleep and listened to her heartbeat slow to a steady rhythm that would soothe me all night.

"Will you be gone when I wake up?" Bella asked in a slow whisper.

"Yes," I whispered back as I brushed a kiss against her hair as she made a soft noise of disappointment before her body relaxed completely. I held her in my arms all night, listening to her disjointed whispers and wondering what her dreams contained.

* * * * *

Having declined Jasper's invitation to hunt the next day I found myself pacing the house looking for something, anything, to help the hours go faster. With Bella gone the house felt empty and dull even with the cacophony of what Alice liked to think of as music playing in their bedroom. I made my way to the upper level of the house. Originally an attic, the space had been converted into a music room. Ostensibly the room was for everyone to use but as I was the only one inclined to play an instrument the room had become my own personal space.

Taking a seat at the piano I played a simple scale. It had been over a month since I had played anything but the pitch was still perfect. Leaning forward towards the piano cover I gave a careful sniff, catching the barest trace of Carlisle. He had been the one keeping it tuned after all this time.

"Thank you, Carlisle," I murmured.

_You're welcome, Son_, came his instant response.

My hands moved across the keys creating a ripple of sound that resonated in the stillness of the room, a simple tune with a harmonising counter melody. The tune had been whispering in the back of my mind for a while now, but for the time being I wanted to reacquaint myself with some old friends. I shifted into the soothing strains of Beethoven's 'Moonlight Sonata' and followed it with 'Fur Elise'.

"Any requests?" I asked aloud knowing that the others would hear me.

_Oh thank you, Edward. My favourite?_

I smiled at this and launched into Debussy's 'Suite Bergamasque' hearing Esme's hum of pleasure as I worked through the suite towards the unmistakable notes of Clair de Lune. The sun continued on its overhead path across the sky with agonising slowness and still I played on.

Alice kept me company for a while as I played, adding her silent voice to Esme and Carlisle's occasional requests for a particular tune. When Jasper returned to the house after his hunt Alice had stepped into his embrace with a giggle as I launched into the Penguin Café Orchestra's nonsensical 'Music for a Found Harmonium', watching them with a smile at each other as they whirled and dipped around the room.

At last the sun reached its pinnacle overhead and began its slow descent. Emmett and Rosalie returned from their outing, offering greetings and making themselves comfortable downstairs as I played on. Rosalie's thoughts were relaxed as she curled up beside Emmett where he had taken a seat to challenge Jasper to another game of Grand Theft Auto.

"How long as he been playing like that?" I heard Rosalie ask as I paused before launching into another melody.

"All day," Esme sighed, "and it's wonderful."

"All day?" Rosalie said in disbelief. It had been over ten years since I had played for this long. "Edward," she called out in amused exasperation, "you need an off switch."

"He's got one," Alice piped up from the other sofa where she had been playing with Esme's hair, "it's called Bella."

The timing was remarkable. My cell phone began to ring and I snatched it out of my pocket already knowing who the caller was.

"Bella," I smiled, ignoring Alice's comment of 'Told you' downstairs.

"Hi, Edward," she sounded a little breathless and I could hear the ambient noises of campus in the background: conversations as she walked past groups of students, doors opening and closing and the occasional shouted call. "How was your day?"

"Long," I said with feeling.

"Me too," she replied and I could see her smiling in my mind's eye. "Shall I come to you?"

"I could come get you," I offered.

"What, you don't like my truck?"

"It's not a matter of not liking, I just don't trust it."

"Edward," Bella huffed a little at this but I could tell her mood was still upbeat, "I'll have you know my truck is totally roadworthy."

"Nonetheless, I'll pick you up in twenty minutes," I replied and listened to her sigh and agree.

I got up from the piano and flew downstairs to see Alice regarding me with a knowing expression.

_She'll love it, Edward. It's a beautiful day._

* * * * *

Bella was exchanging small talk with Angela and Ben when I arrived and she looked up to give me a brilliant smile as I parked and strolled towards them.

"Here he is," Bella grinned as she reached for my hand. "Angela, this is Edward."

"Hi, Edward," Angela smiled at me and Ben reached out to shake hands.

"Cool grip you've got there," Ben said as we parted.

"Sorry, the air conditioning in the car was a little high," I explained and watched as Ben nodded. He had accepted my words at face value and I felt relieved. Bella's expression however was a study in suppressed mirth. With such an expressive face she would never be able to play poker although given her mind was closed to me it would still be worth an attempt sometime.

_No wonder Bella's so happy_. Angela's thoughts were jumbled but positive. _The way he looks at her … _

"Ready to go?" I smiled at Bella and watched as her smile increased.

"Sure," she nodded and then looked at Angela, "I could be late."

"Same. You've got your phone?" Angela nodded at her and I concealed a smile at Angela's internal excitement to see Bella 'dating'. I sobered however as I wondered what Angela would think if she knew that she had just greeted a predator into their midst. I chaffed a hand against my thigh to conceal my concern as my mind flashed with images of Bella lying bleeding and broken at my feet as James fed on her friends. It couldn't happen. I would not let it happen. I was roused from my thoughts as Bella gave my hand an imperceptible shake.

"Angela, Ben," I nodded at Bella's in turn with a polite smile, "it was good to meet you both."

"Likewise," Ben replied, "maybe we'll see you again sometime."

"I'd like that," I replied carefully before smiling at Bella. "Let's go."

"So are you going to tell me why you couldn't be on campus today?" Bella asked as she fiddled with the CD player in the car as I pulled the car out of the parking lot.

"It's difficult to explain," I began, "but easy to demonstrate. You'll find out soon enough."

"Mmm," Bella leaned back in her seat and looked thoughtful. "I'm intrigued."

"I thought you would be," I smiled.

The drive out of town was uneventful and smooth, although Bella's curiosity had her shifting restlessly in her seat. She watched me as I drove but for the most part stayed silent. When I pulled off the highway and began to follow a track that lead into the forest she gave a mild grumble but said nothing. Her curiosity was definitely getting the better of her.

"Soon," I soothed.

"Hope so, the suspense is killing me," she muttered as she squirmed again.

When I parked the car she unlatched her seatbelt and was out of the car almost as fast as I was.

"Where to do?" Bella gave me a bright smile.

"Up there," I pointed up to the mountain and watched as Bella's face blanched.

"We're hiking?" she plucked nervously at her jeans and looked down at her shoes. "I'm not really wearing the right gear."

"You're perfect," I stepped closer and tilted up her face so that I could give her a soft kiss, "and don't worry, I'll get us up there soon enough if you're feeling brave."

"Bring it on," she replied.

"I can carry you up there but you'll need to climb aboard," I said as I looked around the clearing. Spotting a fallen tree I walked Bella towards it and got her to step up. It was enough of a boost for her to be able to climb onto my back. "Wrap your legs around me," I urged as she settled herself, "and hold on tight."

"You're the boss," she murmured, "but how are you-," she broke of with a gasp and a convulsive clutch of my shirt as I began to run.

Trees and undergrowth flashed by as I ran up the mountain. Bella's heart rate increased and I wondered if it was out of fear or pleasure. I got my answer seconds later as she rested her cheek against the back of my neck with a laugh of sheer delight. Knowing that she could embrace my abilities without being scared of them was a curiously exhilarating moment. We reached the top and I paused to let Bella slip down my back and find her feet with only a slight wobble for balance.

"Wow," Bella pushed her windswept hair off her face and straightened her jeans and coat, "that was incredible, can we do it again?"

"Sure," I beamed at her. I could feel a bubble of pressure in my chest as if I wanted to throw back my head and shout for joy. The pleasure of being with Bella and able to be myself was liberating beyond anything I had experienced in decades.

"So what are you going to show me?" Bella put her hands on her hips as she looked at me like a child waiting for a treat.

"Come here," I invited and held out my hand.

She took my hand eagerly and followed my lead. It was only a few more paces to the edge of the forest at the top of the mountain and once there I hesitated, stepping aside to let Bella see the clearing.

"Oh," Bella's voice was soft now, her face slack with wonder as she gazed at the meadow before us. It was small but beautiful and illuminated by the afternoon sun. Bella took a few more paces forward, her face mesmerised as she stepped into the light. She stood in the meadow and turned in a slow circle as she took in her surroundings and then saw me standing in the shadows watching her. "What are you doing back there?" she called, "Come join me," she held out her hand with a smile that was as dazzling as the sun overhead.

I hesitated and took a deep breath. I could detect no humans nearby so the coast was clear. There was nothing to give me away other than the woman who stood gazing at me, her face bright with curiosity.

"Here goes," I murmured to myself as I stepped into the light.


	14. Chapter 14

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I'm just a very happy textual poacher playing 'what if they were a bit older ...'._

**Chapter 13 refresher**

"_Oh," Bella's voice was soft now, her face slack with wonder as she gazed at the meadow before us. It was small but beautiful and illuminated by the afternoon sun. Bella took a few more paces forward, her face mesmerised as she stepped into the light. She stood in the meadow and turned in a slow circle as she took in her surroundings and then saw me standing in the shadows watching her. "What are you doing back there?" she called, "Come join me," she held out her hand with a smile that was as dazzling as the sun overhead._

_I hesitated and took a deep breath. I could detect no humans nearby so the coast was clear. There was nothing to give me away other than the woman who stood gazing at me, her face bright with curiosity._

"_Here goes," I murmured to myself as I stepped into the light._

**Songlines Ch14**

Bella's encouraging smile faltered as I stepped into the clearing and was illuminated by the sunlight. I kept my gaze steadily on hers as I unbuttoned my shirt and pushed the fabric aside to reveal my chest. Iridescent sparkles danced across Bella's stunned expression as I paced deliberately towards her. She licked her lips as if to say something but no sound emerged. After a long moment she extended a shaky hand to gently touch my chest, snatching it away before placing her palm flat against my skin.

"So now you know," I murmured as Bella gazed at me, still not making a sound. "This is what I am."

"It's incredible," she whispered at last pulling back to look at my face and reaching up to brush my chin, "like diamonds." I was about to speak when she happened to glance from my chest to her hand that rested against it and went pale. Stepping back abruptly she bent over double bracing her hands on her knees as she seemed to struggle for breath.

"Bella," I bent over her, anxious. "Are you-," I stopped as she waved me off.

"Just give me a minute," she said in a weak voice. She looked up at me and her knees wobbled alarmingly before she sank to the ground with a muffled thump. I immediately dropped to my knees beside her.

"What's wrong?" my hands danced over her face, smoothing back her hair and checking her pulse. Her heartbeat was skipping at a rapid pace but at my touch it began to calm down.

"I'm okay," she gulped as she took a deep breath before grasping the edges of my shirt and pushing them aside so that she could look her fill. "You're … my god, Edward." Her eyes were round with shock as she looked at me. "It's like nothing I expected. " She looked over my shoulder back at the shadowed undergrowth of the forest and to my immense surprise she began to giggle. "When I saw you standing in the shadows back there looking so worried I didn't know if you were going to burst into flames or … or-," her giggling increased until she was helpless with laughter.

I put my arms around her and hugged her carefully. This wasn't the laughter of amusement; Bella was going into shock. The afternoon wasn't going as I had planned.

"All this time I thought that maybe you and I were just a little …-," she hiccupped with laughter and waved an impotent hand as she searched for the right word, "_different."_ She reached up to trace my eyebrow with a forefinger before regarding me with a mournful expression. "Turns out I was right but you're not just out of the ordinary, you're a different _species_, and we're dating? How the hell does that work?"

"I don't know," I replied as I watched her trying to process the situation and my heart sank as I watched silent thoughts flit across her face.

"You told me," Bella murmured, "you tried to tell me so many times and I guess I didn't want to believe you but seeing you now …," her voice trailed off.

I nodded. "Now you can see me for the monster I am."

Bella gave me a sharp glance and she sat up straighter to look at me, cupping my face in her hands and surprising me with her fierceness.

"You're not a monster," she said slowly, "Edward I'm not sure I've got my head around just what you think you are, but I know what you're not."

"Bella," I started but she shook her head to stop me.

"No," she said in a resolute tone, "you've saved me, watched over me night after night all at an incredible cost to yourself. That doesn't make you a monster." Bella leaned forward and pressed her lips against mine. "You're beautiful," she whispered, "so very beautiful."

I leaned into her embrace wanting to lose myself in her warmth as she wrapped herself around me but somehow I managed to resist. I pulled away with a sigh of regret and got to my feet. It was now or never.

"I'm not beautiful, Bella," I said slowly so that she could understand my intent, "my species is the perfect killing machine. My looks, my scent, my speed, it's all designed for the hunt."

Bella blinked but I had disappeared, running to the other side of the clearing before she could register the fact that I had moved, pulling up a tree and hurling it into another without any effort. Bella blinked again and I was back in front of her.

"Nothing can out run or out fight me," I said, "and the rest of my family is the same. You need to understand that, Bella. Even Esme who cooked you dinner last night is a predator just like me."

"I know," Bella nodded jerkily as she remained seated. "I know this, you've told me, and you're showing me. What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know," I sank to my knees again and ran a hand distractedly through my hair. "I just don't know," I sighed.

Bella got to her hands and knees and crawled towards me, pushing at my arms until she was straddling my lap.

"Hey," she ducked her head to catch my eyes and gave me a sweet, sad smile. "I'm not screaming, I'm not running," she said in a quiet voice. "I know what you are, and I know you won't hurt me."

"We're taking such a chance," I shook my head marvelling at the woman I held in my arms. "Surely it's doomed to fail."

"Not necessarily," she shook her head, "but are you going to deny what could be?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "I've denied myself for so long, thinking all this time I was a monster."

"You're not," Bella said, leaning forward and cupping my face in her fragile, warm hands.

"I am," I said, "but you make it bearable."

"Let me show you what else I can do," she whispered as she pressed herself against me. I ran my hands up her back, fisting the hair at the nape of her neck as she tried to cover my face with kisses, running her tongue across my lower lip and giving a whimper as I moved to keep my teeth away from her softness.

"You don't know how long I've waited for you," I said in a quiet voice, stroking the pad of my thumb over her bottom lip and watching as blood pooled in her face. I moved my hand to cup it against her cheek, enjoying the rush of warmth beneath her skin. My thirst ripped and flared in my throat, but I ignored it. She lifted a hand to gently trace the shadows beneath my eyes and I leaned into her touch, marvelling at the effect she had on me. I would love her for the rest of my existence.

"Oh, Edward," she murmured before putting her arms around me and drawing me closer still. I wrapped my arms around her waist and buried my face against her neck, closing my eyes in what felt like surrender. We might have sat there for a moment or forever. I didn't know and realised that I no longer cared. I nuzzled against her neck and flicked the tip of my tongue against the pulse point that throbbed beside her ear, making her shiver.

"I'm cold," I murmured.

"And I'm warm," Bella replied as she held me closer. I touched the tip of my tongue to her neck again and I could taste the sun on her skin. She settled herself more comfortably on my lap, wrapping her legs around my waist with a small hum. The shock of my revelations seemed to have passed as Bella moved into another phase of acceptance. I wondered what would happen next to shatter our calm; it seemed that our relationship so far had been one shock after another on both our parts.

Bella's shoulders shook and I lifted my head to look at her in silent inquiry. She gave me a wide-eyed look of solemnity before she bit her lip as her shoulders shook again.

"What?" I reached up to smooth her hair with a wondering hand. Could she be going into shock again?

Bella shook her head from side to side like a drunken marionette.

"S'othing," she said and hiccupped with barely suppressed mirth.

"You're not really selling me on that one," I said, feeling my lips twitch with a slight smile out of sheer reflex in the face of her amusement.

"Just silliness," she shrugged.

"Tell me," I coaxed as I leaned forward to kiss her chin.

"Well, given our situation," Bella leaned forward to kiss the tip of my nose in return, "it's so surreal I just had a random thought."

"Which was?" I raised an eyebrow.

Bella shrugged again and ducked her head with a smile, "I was just thinking that we were like the lion and the lamb."

"Mmph," a snort of amusement bubbled out of me before I could contain it. Bravery aside, Bella's sense of humour certainly leaned towards the macabre. "Silly lamb."

"Sick lion," she agreed as she reached up to comb her fingers through my hair with a loving hand, "but I'm not sure that I'd have it any other way."

She shifted on my lap to make herself more comfortable and I bit back a groan at the delightful friction she was creating. Bella paused as she felt my body's immediate response and gave me a heavy-eyed look. "Ah," she sighed, "so it's not just me?"

"Despite what I am, I'm still a man," I managed as she gave another experimental twist of her hips against mine.

"So I see," she said as she shifted a third time with a slight catch in her voice, "maybe we should do something about that."

She was so warm and her body was getting hotter still as her arousal became more apparent. My hands had slid beneath her bottom to hold her to me and now given our position I realised I was about to become the architect of my own destruction. I moved my hands to her waist to lift her off me with an apologetic grimace as she groaned and clutched at me.

"Please, not yet," she clutched at me frantically, "I'll be good." The note of pleading in her voice stopped me and I leaned back to look at her as she gave me a tremulous smile. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to push but could you … hold me a while longer?"

As if I could resist. I gave a slight nod and gathered her to me again. Bella rested her head on my shoulder and nuzzled into my neck. I had to smile at her instinctive snuggling gesture as I closed my eyes and rested my check against her hair.

"I didn't mean to push," Bella murmured after a brief silence. "Maybe it was an instinctive reaction to … you know."

"I know," I replied I kissed her hair and kept my face against hers. I had read medical journals in the past that had noted a propensity for humans to seek out sexual gratification after an adrenaline rush or traumatic situation. It appeared that Bella had felt the need for a similar life-affirming moment, one that I was unable to accommodate, despite my nearly overwhelming desire to do so. It was too much of a risk and so I found myself swallowing back venom again and again as she signed and nestled against me.

We sat entwined in silence for so long that I found myself drifting in a kind of reverie. My body had no need for sleep but it seemed that my mind welcomed the silence that only Bella could provide. My thoughts began to slow until I became almost mindless with relaxation, content simply to count the steady thrum of Bella's pulse.

After a time Bella straightened a little in my arms and turned her face towards mine, kissing her way along my jaw. My eyes were closed and so I found myself turning blindly towards her seeing out her lips with my own. Bella moved tentatively now, moving with a caution meant to reassure as she gave me a soft kiss. I was still drifting, smiling at Bella's gentle movements as she shifted in front of me again and cupped my face in her warm, soft hands. She kissed and sucked on my bottom lip and without thinking I parted my lips and gave her access. It wasn't until the tip of her tongue touched mine that I realised what I had allowed to happen.

I froze and leaned away from her as carefully as I could. Bella involuntarily leaned against me until she realised that I was trying to put myself out of reach.

"Sorry," I gulped, "didn't want to risk anything."

"Risk? Oh," Bella put her hand to her mouth and gave me a startled smile. "I see what you mean."

"What?" I frowned at her in puzzlement. Mercifully she hadn't cut herself on my teeth. I could taste no blood and it seemed the only other side effect of our encounter was the tightness in my groin that ached for release.

"My lips are a little numb," Bella explained. She tapped her lower lip with her forefinger and smiled at me again.

"It's the venom," I explained as she eased herself off my lap and I helped her to her feet.

Bella had been dusting off her jeans when she paused and looked up at me.

"You're telling me you're venomous as well as being a vampire?"

"Yes," I sighed as I reached for her hand. "Are you sure you don't want to start running and screaming now?"

"Sure I'm sure," Bella moved to stand in front of me and began to carefully button up my shirt. I stood perfectly still and allowed her ministrations, swallowing again as her warm hands brushed against my skin. She gave me a quick look and dropped a kiss at the base of my throat before leaving the top button undone. I moved to fasten it but she stopped me with a shake of her head. "Leave it," she suggested, "I like it that way," she winked, "makes it easier for me to kiss you there."

I left it.

Bella took my hand in hers and we began to walk back towards the forest. "This venom of yours, what's it like?"

"Very effective," I answered after a considered pause.

"Ah," Bella nodded, "so the more you bite something-," she gave me a sidelong look, "the quicker the change?"

"Something like that," I agreed, "Although it's exponentially more painful as well."

"How do you know?" Bella cocked her head as we came to a halt by the tree line.

"Carlisle," I explained, "he's done a lot of research over the," I stopped as I tried to find the right words.

"Over the decades?" she teased with a quick smile.

"Centuries," I corrected, and watched Bella's expression flicker before she composed herself again. No matter how I tried to soften the blow the shocks just kept coming.

"Mm-hmm," she nodded and pursed her lips as she stepped towards me and put her arms around my waist. "Well for a bunch of old guys you're holding up pretty well."

Once again I found myself shocked into laughter.

"Old, huh?" I scooped her up into my arms and gazed into her smiling eyes. "I don't think your average old guy could do this."

"What-," Bella began before her words were snatched away on the wind. I had run with her on my back up the mountain, but now I sprinted. It was only a handful of seconds later when I pulled up to a halt at the edge of the forest at the base. I felt exhilarated. The combination of running and Bella's company; her scent, her love, made me feel almost drunk with the enjoyment of it all.

Bella unclasped her hands from their clutching grasp on my shoulders and pulled the snarls of hair off her face as she looked over her shoulder towards the edge of the forest where we had left my car.

"Holy-," she whispered and then composed herself as she smiled at me. "You can really move." I carefully set her down and waited for her regain her balance before we began to pick our way along the dirt track towards the car. "Getting around on campus with humans must drive you crazy."

"It has its moments," I admitted, "although the benefits far outweigh the cost."

"Benefits?" Bella looked across at me and I flashed her a warm smile. A delighted flush immediately rushed into her cheeks. "Oh, right."

"It's getting late," I commented as I looked up at the fading sky, "I should get you home soon."

"I guess," Bella sighed as I held the car door open for her. I got and sat watching as she buckled herself in before I started the engine, "but just so you know I don't think Angela's going to be sitting up waiting for me."

"I know," I gave a wry smile. Angela's thoughts on campus had been positive to the point of being gleeful on her friend's behalf.

"I had a big lunch," Bella announced suddenly. "As in _really_ big. Really," she said again for emphasis as I looked at her.

"Uh-huh," I nodded, not sure where she was going with this conversation gambit.

"So I won't be needing supper tonight," Bella went on, "if say, we were to end up back at your place."

"Right," comprehension dawned and I nodded in apparent deep thought. "Well when you put it that way I know Esme was keen to see you again."

"It'd be a shame to let her down," Bella agreed. "Look," she twisted in her seat and put a hand on my arm, "let's just pretend we've had a had a two way conversation about this, my reasoning won the day and now you're going to take me to yours."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that," she nodded.

"I can see why Alice likes you so much," I muttered in quiet amusement as I gunned the car towards home. Between the psychic and the human, I didn't stand a chance.

* * * * *

"Bella," Esme beamed as she enfolded Bella in her arms. Only those of us watching could see how carefully Esme moved. Alice seemed to be holding her breath as Bella laughed and gave Esme a quick kiss on the cheek by way of greeting. Esme looked at me over Bella's shoulder, her eyes wide with surprise at Bella's gesture. "Have you eaten?"

"Definitely," Bella nodded, "I wasn't sure what was going to be happening this evening so I took the precaution of stocking up at lunch time."

"Oh," Esme subsided for a millisecond before recovering, "well if you want something later Alice and I made some brownies."

"Really?" Now it was Bella's turn to look surprised, "they're my favourite."

"See?" Alice nudged Esme with a broad smile of delight, "I told you."

"Yes you did," Esme wrinkled her nose in fond amusement as Alice spun to look at Bella.

"I don't suppose," Bella began as she gave Esme and Alice a hopeful look.

"They're fresh out the oven, and there's a pint of vanilla ice-cream in the freezer," Alice supplied, "C'mon." She reached out for Bella's hand and began to tow her towards the kitchen.

"I thought you had a really _big_ lunch," I followed with a grin.

"I did," Bella protested, "but brownies are _different_."

"Don't try to understand, Edward," Alice tossed over her shoulder, "it's a woman thing."

I bit my lip as Esme and Alice nodded in solidarity with Bella's protests. I wondered how long it had been since either of them had enjoyed a brownie if ever. As the three women laughed their way into the kitchen I paused and leaned against the doorframe watching them with a quiet smile.

_Edward, have you got a moment?_

"On my way," I murmured, knowing that Carlisle would hear me in his study upstairs. I crossed to the counter to brush a kiss against Bella's temple. "Carlisle needs me upstairs, are you okay here?"

"Okay?" Bella mumbled around a mouthful of brownie, "Edward, I'm in heaven."

Esme beamed with delight and I saw Bella's gaze flicker towards the brilliant smile, her fork hesitating for the barest instant before she helped herself to another bite.

_She's fine, Edward,_ Alice assured as she put the ice cream away, _and besides, we all hunted this morning unlike someone I could mention._

I snorted at her poorly concealed jibe and left the room.

* * * * *

_Edward_, Carlisle looked up and smiled as I appeared in the doorway of his study, _come in_.

"Carlisle," I nodded as I took a seat opposite his desk.

"Alice told me what you were going to do this afternoon," he leaned back in his chair and he regarded me. "How did it go?"

I raised an eyebrow at the question as the sounds of the happy conversations could be heard downstairs.

"I know it went well," Carlisle smiled, "but what was her reaction?"

"Her reaction was … unexpected," I admitted at last.

_Pleased, Edward. Tell me_, Carlisle prompted after I said nothing further. Carefully, haltingly I told Carlisle about my 'grand reveal' in the meadow, and Bella's shock and gradual acceptance.

"I tried to scare her," I confessed, "I showed her everything and still-," I waved a hand.

_Everything_? Carlisle grinned and then coughed in a vain attempt to hide his amusement. _Sorry,_ he apologised as I huffed, _Emmett's humour does tend to rub off after a while._

"Eighty years is more than a while," I pointed out, watching as Carlisle conceded the point with a nod.

_Go on,_ Carlisle urged, _so what happened._

"She didn't scream, she didn't run," I sighed.

_What did she do?_

I looked up into Carlisle's warm regard and suddenly all my wondering, all my questions and doubts about the situation with Bella distilled into three simple words.

"She kissed me."

Carlisle gazed at me for a long moment before his expression broke into a dazzling smile.

_She's a rare woman, Edward_.

"I know," I said with feeling.

_We know how you feel about her Edward, which leads me to my next question. What are you going to do about this situation?_

I looked down at my lap and clenched my hands against my thighs. It was a question that I had been asking myself ever since I had detected Bella's scent, every evening when I had watched her sleep. The conversation had paused downstairs and I knew that Esme and Alice were waiting for my answer.

"I don't know," I confessed at last, "but I need to keep her safe."

_Agreed,_ Carlisle's answer was swift. _And?_

I looked up at Carlisle who was waiting patiently for my answer. Time meant nothing to us. He would wait as long as he had to.

"And I need to keep her," I admitted at last. "She's mine, Carlisle. Just as much as I'm hers."

* * * * *

I returned downstairs to see Bella sitting on the kitchen counter top as Esme washed the plate at the sink. Alice and Bella were talking which was no great surprise, but what gave me pause was the presence of someone in the kitchen who was unexpected. Jasper. He was standing beside Alice with his arm around her waist as he watched the women banter, even making the occasional comment of his own.

Alice was bubbling with enthusiasm as she spoke and from time to time she would look at Jasper with a smile as if seeking his response. He smiled and pulled her closer with each smile she gave him, eventually giving her a shy kiss. Esme observed this and gave me a grin.

_You know what he's like, Edward. He never could resist a happy emotional climate, and Bella makes everyone so happy …_

"Hey," Bella called in a quiet voice, smiling as I stepped towards her. I was going to stand at her side but allowed myself to be manoeuvred so that I was standing between her thighs. "How's Carlisle?"

"Good," I replied as she gave me shirt a small tug to pull me closer, "he's working on some patient notes."

"He brings his work home with him?" Bella arched an eyebrow at this.

"He's not allowed to," Esme answered from behind us and Bella half twisted to glance at Esme as she continued to speak, "all files have to stay at the hospital, but he likes to think about his patients and write notes to take to work, so he-," Esme broke off with a tiny sound of exasperation. Jasper released Alice to investigate and saw Esme holding the plate that had neatly snapped in half.

"I'm sorry," Esme looked stricken, "I was being so careful."

Bella made a move as if to get down and help, stopping when I gently put out my hands to hold her in place.

"Bella no," I said in a low tone, "sharp edges."

"Don't worry, Esme," Bella said as she subsided against me, "I break plates and cups all the time. My Mom didn't graduate me from plastic until I was practically a teenager."

"You had inhuman strength as well?" Esme asked with a sad smile as Jasper took the pieces from her and dropped them into a bag for disposal.

"No," Bella shrugged, "I was just a klutz, so it's good to see everyone has their moments."

Esme considered this and gave her a grateful smile. "Thank you, Bella."

"Thank _you_," Bella shrugged, "if being a klutz is something that can transcend species then I feel strangely reassured."

Esme laughed and Jasper flashed me a broad smile.

_I'm so glad we can keep her._ Alice gave me a satisfied smile. _Of course I was listening in, what did you expect?_

"Say, Bella," Alice turned to Bella with an artful smile, "can we play dress up some time?"

"Uh," Bella stalled as she looked at me.

"It's your call," I murmured.

"Please?" Alice ducked her head and gave Bella her best 'last puppy in the shop' expression that was, in the family's experience over the years, yet to meet with any resistance. "It won't take long, and I promise you'll have fun."

"Well," Bella gave me another look and I managed to conceal my grin in time, "go on then."

"Excellent," Alice swooped forward and began to usher Bella upstairs.

_Relax, Edward, we won't be long. _

Bella cast me another look over her shoulder as they began up the stairs towards Alice and Jasper's room.

"I'll be waiting," I reassured her.

Esme hesitated in the kitchen and then brushed past Jasper and myself with a smile of apology.

"I'll be with Carlisle," she said as she passed.

Jasper and I exchanged a look. We both knew that she would be upstairs ready for any comment or participation with Alice and Bella if the opportunity arose.

"Outside?" Jasper inclined his head towards the back deck and at my nod walked towards the door. He was moving at a decidedly relaxed pace, whistling under his breath.

"You seem quite satisfied," I commented as I leaned against the balcony railing once we were outside. The sun was setting now and we took a moment to enjoy the view.

"Can't help it," Jasper replied, "it's like a drug."

I nodded at this. I knew what he meant. There was something about Bella's presence in the house that felt inherently _right_. If I had to try and think of it in medical terms it could be likened to a dislocated joint popping back into place.

Bella and Alice could be heard upstairs and I looked up as Bella's voice raised in protest before she was over-ridden by Alice's wheedling tones. I had no idea what was happening up there but knew that Alice would have her way.

"Esme's loving this," Jasper commented, "and so is Alice."

"I know," I looked at the sky that was growing darker, the silhouette of the forest thrown into sharp relief against the sunset. The contrast between light and dark made me think of Bella and myself and I gave a quiet sigh, wondering again what on earth I was going to do.

Jasper gave me a sharp look as he felt my mood dip.

"Edward," he sighed, "don't do this to yourself. You're happy, and it makes us all happy. Don't question it."

"I don't know," I gripped the railing, jerking my hands back with a quiet curse as I felt the wood yield beneath my fingertips. "I just don't know what to do."

"You know what you have to do," Jasper reasoned.

"Perhaps not," I argued. Could I really be the one to end Bella's life? She was so warm, so vital. Could I endure watching her transition from warmth to cold?

"If you don't change her you're playing a dangerous game," Jasper cautioned.

I smiled, finding it ironic that our newest family member and self-confessed 'weakest link' should be the one advocating that I drink my fill from a human for the greater good of the family.

"All those years talking about how it would never work between us and humans," I shook my head. "Perhaps they're right, maybe it is impossible."

"Bella proves that anything is possible," Jasper reasoned.

"Maybe we shouldn't exist at all."

"Or maybe you were made for each other. Maybe the universe has a plan for us after all," Jasper said, staring sightlessly towards the woods. "You know, Edward, maybe you could stop hating yourself once in a while and see what's in front of you."

_Or coming downstairs towards you,_ Alice added. I turned and waited, watching through the windows of the house as Bella appeared in the living room and glancing around before making her way outside. She opened the back door and stepped out with a smile.

"Well that was relatively painless," she announced as she stopped and gave a slow twirl.

Alice had talked Bella into changing shirts. I didn't follow fashion as assiduously as the women, but I knew enough to like what I saw. Alice had come up with some sort of layered effect that combined blue, brown and cream tones in a way that made Bella's skin tone glow in the warm light that spilled onto the back deck from the kitchen. Long dangling earrings had been added that swung and shimmered against her hair as she glanced from Jasper to myself.

"Wow," I breathed as I held out my arms. She came willingly.

"There's that olde worlde charm I've been waiting for," Bella teased as she put her arms around my waist, startling Jasper into laughter.

_She's a firecracker all right. Can you imagine what she and Alice will be like when they're on an even footing?_ Jasper made that his parting shot as he went back inside to find Alice.

"You like?" Bella gazed up at me and I could see that Alice had carefully brushed on some mascara and a smudge of lip-gloss.

"You were beautiful before," I said with complete honesty.

"And now?" she asked, pleased.

"Wow," I repeated and smiled as she laughed.

I lifted my head as I heard a car approaching the house, narrowing my eyes as I tried to listen to any thoughts being broadcast.

"What?"

"Emmett and Rosalie are coming," I replied as I listened carefully. The flavour of Emmett's thoughts was the same as always: good food, good sex and a happy mate. Rosalie seemed distracted but reasonably well disposed. I hoped that disposition would continue when she arrived to see Bella back at the house.

"Where? I can't hear anything," Bella was mystified, "or is that a special vamp thing?"

"Mm-hmmm," I nodded as I leaned down to give her a kiss.

We were still outside talking when Emmett and Rosalie appeared.

"There she is," Emmett beamed, "good to see you again, Bells."

"Hi, Emmett," Bella waved and then leaned slightly to peek at Rosalie who was standing further behind him, "Rosalie."

"Bella," Rosalie inclined her head but didn't seem to be in a conversational mood.

Emmett ignored her completely as he strolled towards us, reaching up in a lightning fast move to ruffle my hair.

"Hey," I objected and jerked away.

"Ha," Emmett said with satisfaction as he turned to Bella, "he likes to think he's the fastest but I can still get him."

"Right," I scoffed.

Alice had appeared in the living room with some shopping bags and was calling for Rosalie to join her.

"I'll be inside," Rosalie said to Emmett, her gaze skimming across Bella and offering a thin smile before she turned and walked away.

"O-kay," Bella rubbed her hands on her thighs and looked from me to Emmett, "what'd I do?"

"Nothin', Bells," Emmett assured her, "Rosie just takes a little warming to sometimes."

_She's fine, Edward. You know what Rosie's like with change. Give her time._

I nodded at his silent comment and moved closer to Bella so that she could lean against me.

"How long did it take for you to win her over?" Bella gave him an arch look and was surprised when Emmett sobered at the question.

"Not long at all, which I thank God for every day," he replied. "She found me all but dead after a bear attack in the woods."

"Oh, so you mean she-," Bella began, stopping when Emmett shook his head.

"No, she didn't," he said in a gentle voice. "She brought me home."

Bella turned her head to look up at me and so I took up the story.

"Rosalie has never tasted human blood," I explained, "but she brought Emmett home-,"

"What was left of me anyways," Emmett broke in with a quiet smile.

"What was left of him," I nodded my agreement and continued, "and Carlisle was the one that changed him."

Bella glanced back at Emmett. "So Carlisle is your … Sire? Is that the right word?"

"He is," Emmett nodded, "he's also Rosalie's, Esme's and Edward's."

"So he really is the father of the family," Bella said to herself. "But wait, if you hadn't met her before you were changed then how did you-," Bella stumbled over her words at this point, "I mean, you said she takes a while to warm up so-, she stopped again and looked embarrassed.

"How could I _not_ love her?" Emmett said. "She was the first person I saw when I woke up and I thought I was looking at an angel. How can anyone be capable of anything _but_ love for the person who saved-," he stopped. Now it was Emmett who looked a little flustered as he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand.

Bella watched him carefully, aware that she had somehow questioned Emmett's core belief in his mate without ever having meant to cause any offense.

"I'm sorry, Emmett," she began, and stopped. I rubbed her shoulder carefully in a bid to offer her reassurance. Emmett's thoughts were full of Rosalie, blurred human memories of her face as she bent over his dying body, the disbelief as he saw her clearly for the first time after he had emerged from his transformation. "That's one hell of a pedestal you've got her on there."

"She's never fallen off," Emmett said with a grateful smile at Bella's proffered olive branch, "although we've certainly had our moments over the years." He glanced through the window at Rosalie who was in the process of sorting through some jewellery with Alice, bickering over which ones to wear and shaking her head at Alice's protestations that she had 'seen' her in something else.

"My Momma told me that love was made in heaven," he said with a quiet smile.

"So are thunder and lightening," Bella observed.

Emmett nodded with a sly grin. "Well, that makes sense too."

* * * * *

And so Bella spent another evening in the company of vampires. She talked and laughed and allowed herself to be accessorised by a very happy Alice. Jasper sat on the sidelines smiling at his mate's happiness; Carlisle came downstairs when he had finished his work and took a seat on one of the couches to join in the conversation. Esme made some more hot chocolate and wrapped up some brownies for Bella to take home. Emmett kept teasing me on the sidelines about the end of my bachelor lifestyle and Rosalie watched from the sidelines.

Eventually the conversation shifted to extreme sports of all things, and Bella peppered us with questions as to which ones we had tried.

"Man, I remember my first sky-dive," Emmett said with a reminiscent smile. "I was pretty excited with my first plane ride, but sky-diving," he gave a low whistle, "now _that's_ flying."

"No, I think that's _plummeting_," Bella replied, grinning as Emmett laughed in agreement.

"Maybe," he agreed.

"How about you, Rosalie?" Bella tried to engage Rosalie in the conversation. "Have you ever done something like that?"

"Not when I was human, and not now," Rosalie replied in a bland tone, "but I'll never underestimate the stupidity of what humans will do."

Emmett winced at this and I tensed in my seat as Bella blinked at Rosalie for a moment, considering her response.

"You know, Rosalie," she began, "it seems to me that you could maybe cut me some slack. I believe you used to be human before you became a vampire."

Now it was Rosalie who blinked and then to everyone's surprise, a slow smile appeared on her face.

"So the little kitten has claws after all," she commented at last. "I was wondering what it was that Edward saw in you."

I made no attempt to suppress the growl that began in my chest and Bella looked at me in alarm.

"Edward," she cautioned, reaching across to put my fingertips on her wrist. I made myself relax by counting her heartbeat and focussing on the warmth of her skin.

"Babe," Emmett cautioned as he rubbed his hand over Rosalie's back until she subsided against him. Esme had leaned forward in her seat a little, her thoughts broadcasting her distress for all that her façade remained serene.

"Just saying what was on my mind," Rosalie shrugged. She had never made any apology for being anything other than what she was. This apparent frankness had been abrasive for the intervening years leading up to Emmett's arrival. Now her blunt honesty was softened by his loving acceptance. If Emmett's ability to make friends was his gift, then Rosalie's was that of loyalty. She would do whatever she could to protect her family. We all knew that if Bella could pass the impossible test that Rosalie had decided upon then the matter of Bella becoming a part of our family would never be questioned again.

"Rosalie, can I ask you a question?" Bella cocked her head as she considered the stunning blonde that sat facing her.

"Of course," Rosalie's response was impassive.

"Have you hunted today?" The question was so unexpected that it caught all of us off guard but Bella continued. "Because you look like you need to kill something, and I've had a great day so I'll be damned if it's going to be me."

The two women sat staring at each other in silence before a slow smile tugged at Rosalie's lips.

"I'll bear that in mind," she said at last.

_She's got a backbone, Edward. I think I like her._

Emmett boomed with laughter and hauled Rosalie into his arms for an exuberant kiss despite her half-hearted protests. Esme and Carlisle exchanged a smile as Alice and Jasper laughed. Meanwhile Bella shot me an amused grin and leaned against my side, resting her hand on my chest and reaching up to give me a kiss. I caught Rosalie's eye as Bella nuzzled my neck.

"Good to know," I nodded at my sister, and felt oddly reassured by her answering nod.

_She's not just yours now, Edward. _Alice chimed at me as she wriggled herself onto Jasper's lap. _She's ours._


	15. Chapter 15

_**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, and well … this is fan fiction, and you know how the saying goes. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery … but if that's the case, then what is cloning?**_

**Songlines Ch15**

It had been a long day for Bella and she had been all but asleep on her feet when I finally coaxed Bella into agreeing to go home to get some sleep.

_She's trying to keep us with us, Edward_, Carlisle cautioned. _Don't let her get too tired._

When she had tripped on the top step I had scooped her into my arms and carried her to the car ignoring her protests. Her insistence that she was perfectly fine, thank you very much, were all for naught. As I pulled the car out onto the road she had fumbled for my hand, clasping it all the way home even when she had fallen into a light doze. She had woken up enough to stumble inside her apartment building while I waited outside and by the time I eased myself over her windowsill she had changed into her favourite old t-shirt and crawled into bed. She had lifted her head off the pillow at the sound of my entrance and given me smile that drew me inexorably towards her.

"How many times has this scene happened?" Bella asked as I stood beside the bed gazing down at her.

"More times than I care to admit," I answered as I sat down on the bed. "But this is new," I continued as I ran my hand up and over the curve of her hip before leaning down for a kiss. I felt Bella's lips smile against my own before she reached up to pull me towards her, encouraging me closer and closer until I was all but lying on top of her. The gentle rotation of her hips against mine brought me back to my senses. I broke away from the kiss with considerable regret. Bella was in bed beneath the covers and I was pressed up against her, her warm hands on my neck as she kissed me,

"Perhaps it's better if I leave," I suggested in a gentle voice.

"No," Bella made a drowsy grab for my shirt as I made to get off the bed. "Please stay."

"Bella, this can't possibly end well, it's too dangerous."

"You can't leave without giving me some answers." Bella struggled out of the covers enough to hook a leg over my hips. Her strength was nothing compared to mine but the way she smiled at me was enough to still my half-hearted gesture.

"Mmm," I leaned and ran my nose along her neck inhaling her scent, "ask away then, I'm all yours."

"If only," Bella blinked at me and pursed her lips as she considered her next move. I leaned forward and gave her a kiss, smiling against her lips as she instinctively moved closer. Her eyes fluttered closed and she subsided from our kiss with a quiet sigh. I tucked the covers in around her as carefully as I could and lay waiting for her to speak. There was a long silence and when I looked at her I saw that she had gone to sleep. I settled myself more comfortably and watched as her eyelids began to flicker, chasing dreams.

I looked down again as Bella shifted uneasily beside me. Her eyes flew open as she clutched convulsively at my shirt.

"Hey," I whispered as I brushed my knuckles across her cheek.

"I thought you were gone," she said in a broken whisper as she struggled to wake up.

"I'm here," I soothed, "go back to sleep."

"You left," she said, and this time her tone was accusatory as she fought against the sleep that was pulling her back under.

"No I didn't, I'm here," I kissed her forehead and sighed against her skin. My breath puffed over her face and she smiled as her eyes fluttered closed. She slept and I watched her all night as she chased invisible dreams.

* * * * *

The next afternoon I watched as Bella yawned discretely behind her hand as we walked towards her next lecture. My schedule was done for the day but I had no desire to leave campus just yet.

"What are you going to do for the next couple of hours?" Bella asked, "It's not like you have to study."

"I'll wait for you," I replied as I glanced down at her shoes. I found myself taking an absurd pleasure in matching my pace to hers, wondering if she knew that her walking pace matched her heartbeat. What had seemed a cripplingly slow human pace a few weeks ago now felt meaningful; being with Bella in public was a way to somehow prolong the pleasure I took in her company.

"You'll wait?" Bella pulled a face at this.

"You don't want me to?"

"It's not that I don't want you to, but won't you get bored?" Bella waved a hand to indicate her surroundings as we entered the building where her next lecture was located. "You don't need to study, it's not like you need to eat, or at least," she amended, "you can't eat what's on offer."

"Perhaps, but the most important thing to me is here," I said as we paused at the door to her lecture, "which is you." I gave her what I intended to be a quick kiss which changed as soon as our lips came into contact. Bella stepped closer to press herself against my chest as she offered herself up for more.

_Get a room … _

_So the Ice Princess can melt after all, I bet she … _

I ignored the contemptuous thoughts I could hear from Jessica but my head snapped up as the next person approached. Mike gave Bella a welcome smile as he approached which belied the near-pornographic thoughts he was having about the woman in my arms.

"Hey, Bella," he offered me a nod by way of greeting as he kept his attention on the object of my affection.

"Mike," Bella made as if to disentangle herself from me and paused as she registered the fact that my arms were completely immobile around her waist.

I gave Mike a wide smile that displayed my teeth to their best advantage and watched as he hesitated before picking up his pace and disappearing through the door into the lecture hall.

_Freak._

I was congratulating myself as I looked down to see Bella giving me a measuring gaze.

"What?"

"What did you just do?" She wriggled again and this time although I was still reluctant I let her go.

"Nothing," I could hear the tone of protest in my voice and wondered how someone so young, so human could call me out on my behaviour. "Just smiled is all."

"Right," she muttered, "and I've seen what that can do."

"Really? And what's that?" I was intrigued now, watching as Bella hauled the strap of her satchel into a more comfortable position on her shoulder.

"Dazzle women, stare six types of shit out of Mike," Bella indicated where Mike had gone with a jerk of her head. "I don't know how you dial up the wattage on that smile of yours but it's very effective."

"Mm-hmm," I considered this and stepped closer as I smiled at in what I hoped was a winning fashion, "and is it working now?"

"You tell me," Bella whispered as she gave a reluctant smile of her own. I lifted my hand to feel the pulse at her throat, my smile widening as I felt the rapid tattoo.

More students filed past us and into the hall. Bella exchanged greetings with some of them and I admired the way the tendons of her neck moved beneath her skin shifting and pulling the veins; it was a symphony of warmth.

"I should go," she admitted and I nodded. I didn't want to be the one to move away and so it was Bella who turned with considerable reluctance and pushed the door open.

"I'll be waiting," I promised.

* * * * *

"I've got bad news," Alice frowned and Jasper and I exchanged a mystified look before looking at her. I had ended up at a remote table in the library where Alice and Jasper had sought me out when their classes had finished. "Sunny skies ahead," Alice explained as she blinked and came back to us.

"Good hunting weather," Jasper smiled and I had to admit he had a point. When the weather was temperate more animals were inclined to come out to forage, and we were no exception.

"For how long?" I frowned at this. Bella's schedule for the week was heavy on campus.

"Most of the week," Alice shook her head and gave me a chagrined look. "Sorry, for but for what it's worth Bella will be okay."

"Right," I accepted the information Alice offered but still felt unhappy about it. I hadn't known about Bella's existence for the last twenty-two years but somehow the thought of not being around her for a few short days seemed untenable.

"You'd better get going," Alice went on, "her class is nearly over and your little display earlier got your girl some attention."

"What?" I glared at Alice as she gave a jaunty nod.

"Do tell," Jasper urged with a sly grin. _Never thought I'd see him getting hot and bothered. It's about time he-_

"Enough, Jasper," I gritted. "Alice, explain yourself."

Alice opened her mouth to speak and then subsided. "Talk is cheap, I'll give you some show and tell."

"Why do I have to miss out on the fun?" Jasper objected. "We're not all mind-readers."

"Fun for who? Alice," I warned her, "come on."

"Fine," Alice pouted as she leaned against Jasper. "Bella has been able to avoid male interest for most of the year but now your little display before her lecture has gotten a few of the guys thinking about her now."

"Tell me around it," I growled as I remembered Mike's fantasies from earlier.

"How bad are we talking here?" Jasper shifted in his seat as he leaned forward to Alice. _How bad could it be?_

Alice shot him an amused look. "I seem to recall someone here thought Bella was quite the threat to us when Edward first discovered here."

"Well," Jasper shrugged, "that was before we knew her."

"Ah," Alice nodded, "and snack-wise?"

"She's a friend," Jasper looked wounded, "and you're watching out for me, right?"

"Definitely," Alice assured him, "and we're being really careful. I don't want to even risk a paper cut on our girl."

"Good to know," I muttered, but my attention was still on the matter of Bella's classmates. Perhaps I could hold off on leaving town with the family.

"Edward," Alice reached over to gently touch my arm, "you have to feed. You're no good to Bella if you don't."

"I know," I rubbed my face and huffed out an impatient breath. "Fine," I put my hands on the desk with a little more force than necessary and stood up ignoring the way the table creaked and groaned. "I'll see you later."

"Tell Bella we said hi," Alice grinned.

I arrived at the lecture hall moments before the doors opened and students began to spill out. Looking through the doorway I could see Bella standing by her seat as she gathered her books, Mike and Eric lingering nearby exchanging small talk with her.

"So," Mike ventured after a few lame comments about the lecture, "you and that guy, what's his name?"

"Cullen," Bella supplied helpfully, "he's Edward Cullen."

"Right, so you two are dating?"

"Looks that way," Bella nodded as she hugged her textbooks to her chest and turned to make her way down the stairs.

"I've gotta say, Bella, I don't like it," Mike shook his head as he followed, seeming oblivious to the daggers Jessica was shooting him as she walked as close as she was able. Her thoughts were frustrated and I had no doubt that had she been able she would have stamped _'Taken'_ in large red letters across Mike's forehead. Not that any of that mattered. As soon as Bella made it to the foot of the stairs she looked across to the door and smiled when she saw me.

"What's not to like?" Bella asked Mike as she held my gaze knowing full well I could hear their conversation.

"I dunno," Mike shrugged as he admired Bella's hair that fell in loose waves around her shoulders, "he just looks at you like you're something to eat."

I grinned at this and watched as Bella laughed and shook her head at Mike.

"Seriously, Bella," Eric spoke up, "we hardly see you any more. Is everything okay?" Eric's thoughts were just as covetous as Mike's but at least he kept things within socially acceptable boundaries. He wanted her, there was no doubt of that, but I had to grudgingly appreciate the fact that at least he wasn't standing there visualising a clumsy teenage attempt at the karma sutra. If anything Eric seemed a little wistful that a woman he had thought was perhaps just within reach was now well beyond his grasp.

"I'm fine," Bella assured him with a grateful smile, "thanks for your concern guys, but everything's great. I can look after myself."

I felt my smile slip just a fraction at this. Like hell she could. Just when I thought she might be starting to appreciate the dangers in her life she had to go and say something like that.

"Stop it," Bella scolded in an undertone as she reached my side and took my hand.

"Stop what?"

"You're looking at me like you just want to roll me up in bubble wrap or something. I was fine before you came along and I'm fine now."

"But you don't know how-," I began and stopped in amazement as she _shushed_ me.

"So I'll find out. You can't just hover over me all the time and expect me to be okay with that. You might know more than me, but you've got to give me a chance to find out for myself."

"Very well," I was grumbling now and very mindful that I was regressing to what Esme called my 'seventeen year old boy' behaviour but was apparently unable to help myself, "but it doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Listen," Bella stopped and put her hand on my chest, "I'm not cotton candy, I won't melt," and with that she lifted herself up onto tiptoe to kiss me and the sweetness of her lips belied her words. Bella smiled at me again and we resumed walking with lighter hearts.

"What do you want to do tonight?" I asked Bella.

"I should study," Bella said after a moment's consideration, "what about you?"

"Keep you company," I said replied.

"Another thrilling evening of you watching me eat and then spend the best part of the evening asleep. I had no idea you vampires were such adrenaline junkies," Bella teased. "Don't you get bored?"

"With you? Not at all; I never know just what you're going to do next and it's … intriguing."

"Mmph," Bella snorted under her breath. "Will I see you at class tomorrow?"

"Ah and now we get to the bad news, the forecast is for sunny weather most of the week."

"Oh," that stopped her in her tracks. "So what will you do?"

"The official line is that we'll be camping," I said as she resumed walking.

"Ah," she nodded at this, "and unofficially?"

I flashed a brilliant smile at her that showed enough of my teeth to give her my answer.

"Right, hunting," Bella nodded again. "Makes sense, your eyes are getting darker."

"You noticed?" I was the one that slowed down now as I looked at her.

"Sure, they're more golden when you've, uh, eaten," she replied, exchanging a nod and a smile with a passing student. The campus was its usual hive of activity and I found it curiously unsettling to have other students greeting me by name. Used to maintaining a low profile and having people avoid me, it seemed that Bella was making me more visible.

"That's one way of putting it," I murmured.

"Gotta love a good euphemism," Bella agreed. "So you'll be away all week?"

"Yes," I sighed at this as I realised we had barely been apart over the last few weeks.

"I'll miss you," she said with a wistful smile.

"It's entirely mutual," I nodded and then looked at her again as a thought occurred to me. "Actually while I'm away I'd recommend you don't walk anywhere alone at night."

"Okay."

I paused to consider the situation. "Or go out by yourself."

"What aren't you telling me?" Bella frowned.

"Let's just say I'm not the most dangerous thing out there," I suggested.

"Well I'm a big girl now, I can look after myself."

"True," I smiled at her statement, "but a couple of weeks ago you didn't know that vampires existed. It's a different world for you now."

"I know," Bella wrinkled her nose affectionately at me, "I love it."

"You love what could get you killed," I said in disbelief.

Bella leaned closer to me, nudging me with her shoulder as we walked hand in hand. "You know what I mean."

Now I stopped and looked at her.

"I think I do," I began slowly, watching as Bella stepped closer to me.

"Just so we're clear," Bella tugged at my shirt front and I automatically dipped my head towards hers, "I love you." Her lips were warm and soft and we only parted for the barest instance before going back for more.

"Check out the love bunnies," a voice called, and we broke apart to see Angela approaching us with a grin. "Hey stranger," she said to Bella.

"Like you can talk," scoffed Bella, "how's Ben?"

I looked on as Bella delighted in the slow flush that suffused Angela's face.

"He's fine," she nodded "really good, uh-," Angela shot me a glance and I gave her an encouraging nod. "We're going out for dinner tonight and then back to his place for a movie."

Angela's thoughts were an open book to me and so I was a beat ahead of her before she could speak.

"Why don't you join us?" Angela enthused, "I know Ben would like to spend time with you guys, it'll be fun."

"Actually-," Bella began temporising, "Edward just told me he's going away for a few days so maybe we'll stay in."

"Oh," Angela subsided a little at this, "well maybe next time." _She's looking pale._

I glanced at Bella as Angela considered her friend. Bella had always been on the pale side but I could see the subtle signs that my being in her life had made on her. Her skin was milky translucent and I could see telltale blue crescents beneath her eyes. Carlisle was right, she was trying to keep up with our lifestyle and it was starting to show to her detriment. Something was going to have to be done about that.

"For sure," Bella was agreeing as I slid my arm around Bella's waist.

"Why don't you guys do something while I'm out of town, the four of us can arrange something when I get back. It'd be nice to hang out with you guys," I suggested and watched as Angela's expression cleared.

_Has she lost weight? She looks happy but …_

"In the meantime," I went on smoothly "maybe you two need a girl's night in, and while you're at it see if you can get her to eat plenty of something."

"Excuse me? I'm standing right here," Bella objected as Angela burst into giggles.

"Sorry, Bella, but I'm with Edward on this one. Besides," she went on in a confiding tone as if pretending I wasn't there, "any boyfriend that recommends Ben & Jerry is okay by me."

"Well," Bella gave a grudging smile, "when you put it that way."

"With hot fudge," Angela continued.

"Sold, I'm there," Bella agreed immediately and then winked at me, "when did you say you were leaving?"

"Oh it's like that now, huh?" I raised my eyebrows at her, playing along the three of us set off across campus towards the parking lot.

By the time we escorted Angela to her car her thoughts were that of happy anticipation. She was looking forward to spending time with Ben and was already planning a night at home that involved copies amounts of movies, ice cream and chocolate. Simple human activities of course but ones that Bella had been missing out on of late, and it would be good for her. We stood waving Angela off before turning towards where I had parked my car.

"She's a good friend," I commented as I opened Bella's door for her.

"The best," Bella agreed, "she has a good heart."

"Like attracts like," I commented and then paused as I considered the contrast between Bella and myself. A young human and a decades old vampire; what good could possibly come of that?

"So you're going to be away for how many days?" Bella asked as I got into the car and started the engine.

"Four," I replied, feeling glum at the prospect myself.

"Maybe I could come to the house at night if you're going to be there?"

I shook my head. "We won't be. We'll be going across state lines so that we don't hunt out the local game." I pulled out into traffic and glanced across at Bella who was looking surprised. "It's an alternate diet but we have to make sure it's sustainable without arousing suspicion with some of the local wildlife groups."

"Sure," Bella nodded and leaned into her seat again, "I can understand that but it's going to be strange."

"I agree."

"Is this even healthy?" Bella thought aloud, "we're only just dating and suddenly I can't imagine a day without you."

"Perhaps the others had a point," I said gently, "you need to do more things, _human_ things."

"They're not as interesting," Bella argued.

"Perhaps, but they're what's right for you," I continued, "eating, sleeping, socialising. It's what any young woman your age should be doing, not-," I broke off with a grimace, "spending your evenings with a family that doesn't sleep, doesn't eat-,"

"Hey," Bella reached over to gently touch my arm, "I'm not doing anything I don't want to be doing."

"Sometimes I wonder," I muttered to myself.

"What makes you say that?" Bella pushed her hair off her face and twisted in her seat so that she could face me a little better. Her movement sent a puff of her scent wafting across my face and I closed my eyes to luxuriate in its complexity: vanilla and musk from her body wash, the mocha she had enjoyed between classes, all underpinned with the exquisite scent of her blood.

"Your own curiosity may be getting the better of you," I answered as I increased the speed of the car as soon as I had ascertained that there were no police in the vicinity.

Bella subsided in her seat at this and said nothing for the rest of the drive. I glanced at her on occasion and tried to engage her in conversation but she would not be drawn. Now her silence became oppressive rather than restful. I had no way of knowing that was going on in that head of hers but given the way in which she had resolutely turned her face away to stare out the window told me it wasn't anything good.

Arriving back at her apartment Bella was out of the car and at the door of the building without a word, leaving me speechless in the car as I watched her go inside without looking back. I got out of the car and leaned against it as I pondered my next move, looking up when Bella appeared at the front door. She leaned against the doorway and regarded me for a moment before nodding once and turning away to walk inside leaving the door ajar. I pushed myself away from the car and followed her silent invitation indoors.

The living room of the apartment was small but functional: the furniture seemed mostly Ikea standard which seemed popular with students these days. Bella's room revealed the most of her personality and so I found it unsettling to be in an environment where she seemed so diluted. I stood and watched in silence as she shucked off her coat and hung it by the door before turning to me with an unfathomable expression.

"Come on," she said and with that simply turned and walked towards her room. When I appeared in the doorway she was sitting on the edge of the bed. Silently I approached and sank to my knees in front of her so that we were at eye level with each other.

"Bella-," I began but stopped when she shook her head.

"Edward, you can't protect me from everything. No-one can, so it's foolish for you to try."

"But I want to," I argued and watched as she reached out to cup my face in her hands.

"I know," she soothed, rubbing her thumb over my lower lip, "and I know why, but I can't be stifled like that. It's not fair to either of us."

I lowered my gaze to the floor as I considered her words.

"I guess," Bella ventured after a long pause, "we could chalk this up to the generation gap." She offered a tremulous smile, "I suppose back in your day women were treated differently."

"You could say that," I sighed, "and no matter how much time goes by those values are still at my core. It's difficult for me to change my ways after so long."

"Well we'll have to see what we can do about that," Bella replied. She ran her hands through my hair and I sighed as I leaned into her touch. It was such a simple gesture but one that I didn't realise I had missed until now. Using slight pressure Bella urged me forward until my head was resting in her lap. She kept combing my hair with her fingers and drawing lazy spirals on my shoulders. I sighed again and put my arms around her hips, anchoring myself to her even more. The room still felt sad but the silence was no longer oppressive. The two of us had reached a plateau although I had no idea if we had yet to scale another peak or leap off the cliff to whatever lay below. I closed my eyes and gave myself over to her ministrations and if I had been able I believe I would have fallen asleep in her arms.

"Hey," Bella whispered at last and I lifted my head to look at her. "How about we get more comfortable?"

"You need to eat," I murmured as my gaze flickered to the window. It was getting dark outside and I wondered how long we had been sitting silently in each other's arms.

"Not hungry," Bella shook her head and I frowned at this. Angela's assessment had been right, she wasn't eating enough. "Seriously, I don't feel hungry right now. I'll make up for it at breakfast, I promise." She gave me a quick grin, "Now that I know you and Angela are both going to be on my case about it, I promise to eat enough to make a lumberjack blush."

"If you're sure," I said doubtfully.

"Edward, I just want to get into bed."

"Shall I go?" I asked and was reassured when she gave a firm shake of her head.

"No, but you can do me a favour and look the other way while I change, or I could go to the bathroom."

"I can wait outside," I offered as I stood up, and watched her smile.

"Always the gentleman," she murmured. "Stay here, I'll change in the bathroom." She gathered a few items and disappeared from the room.

Not knowing what to do I took a seat in my chair and waited. Bella performed her ablutions and reappeared where the soft cotton camisole and pants she favoured for sleep. She was brushing her hair as she walked back into the room and she set the brush down on her bedside table with a soft click before she pulled back the covers and crawled into bed.

"Could you get the light?" Bella called in a soft voice.

I got up and switched off the overhead, watching as Bella blinked against the darkness to adjust her vision and then held out a hand to gesture me to her knowing full well I could see her clearly. Cross the room I stood beside her as she fumbled for my hand, and allowed me to draw her down onto the bed beside her.

I moved carefully, wanting to make sure she was comfortable enough as I lay alongside her, one hand behind my head as she moved around before resting her head on my shoulder.

"I wasn't sure you'd want this," I ventured after a careful pause.

Bella gave a soft huff and put her hands on my chest to push herself into a half sitting, half leaning position over me.

"Edward I'm not mad at you, frustrated maybe but we're both finding our way through this," she dipped her head to kiss me. "We'll get there," she whispered as she dipped back for more. I wound my fingers in her hair to hold her to me.

Eventually we broke apart and lay wrapped in each other's arms. It had been over 80 years since I'd experienced what it was like to spend a night in bed. I had no need for sleep, but being in bed with Bella, cocooned in warmth and softness had me never wanting to leave.

"How long will you be gone?" Bella's question came out of nowhere and I brushed a kiss against her forehead as I considered my answer.

"Two days at most," I replied at last.

"You said four days earlier," Bella replied, her voice burred with sleep.

"And now I'm saying two days is the most I can stay away," I admitted, and felt Bella's shoulders shake with silent amusement.

"Good," she said in a satisfied tone as she closed her eyes and snuggled closer to me.

* * * * *

Esme was glowing. She and Carlisle had just returned to the clearing where we had all agreed to meet and it was immediately apparent that she had hunted well. Her eyes were sparkling and she moved with a carefree confidence that we rarely saw back at the house where she was constrained by more human obligations. Here there were no plates to shatter; it was just us and the great outdoors. Outdoors that is, until we retired to the cabin for some respite.

"Edward," she smiled when she saw me and gave me a hug that I smilingly returned. Esme loved family time, especially when we could 'be ourselves' as she liked to put it. "I'm glad you could make it, how's Bella?"

"As if you need to ask," Emmett scoffed as he appeared with Rosalie who was plucking some stray twigs and leaves out of her hair with a very satisfied expression, "just look at him."

As if on cue everyone looked at me and I sighed and pushed myself away from the group and look the path that led back to the cabin, shaking my head as the family bombarded me with their thoughts. I had gotten used to being able to lower my guard when I was with Bella but now that I was away from her restful silence I would have to distance myself to regain a measure of control. Even Rosalie's thoughts seemed curiously well disposed towards Bella, and I suspect that was in part to the fact that someone – a human at that – had stood their ground in the face of her aloofness.

_He's so happy now that … sorry, Edward._ Esme's thoughts were tinged with regret as she saw that I was becoming overwhelmed.

_It'd be more fun with Bella here,_ Emmett commented.

"Is Bella coming?" Emmett called after me.

"No, she has to study," I commented as I kept walking. I had delayed leaving as long as possible and had driven Bella to campus, lamenting that I had been unable to get out of the car to walk her to class.

_Pity, _was Emmett's swift reply. I smiled at this. Emmett had definitely taken a liking to Bella and this was all the more welcome as it meant Rosalie would not be far behind.

"Maybe next time," Rosalie commented, and then "What? I'm just saying," she went on in the face of Alice's surprise.

_Score one to the big guy,_ Jasper's thoughts were coloured with amusement.

"Edward," Carlisle pitched his voice so that everyone could hear it, making for a more democratic conversation when everyone could hear both parties, "have you fed?"

"Not yet," I admitted.

"Perhaps now's the time," Carlisle urged in a gentle voice.

I stopped in my tracks and cast a glance at him over my shoulder before turning around slowly. My family paused in the act of following me: Rosalie holding Emmett's hand, Alice peering over Jasper's shoulders having clambered up onto his back for a ride, and Esme with her arm around Carlisle's waist.

_Son, you must feed, for Bella's safety if not for yourself._

It was enough. I nodded once and then stepped off the track.

_You know,_ Carlisle went on. _If your hunt goes well perhaps you don't need to stay away as long._

I looked at Carlisle who gave me a slight smile. As a rule we hunted when it became absolutely necessary but lately it seemed that the family was hunting more often. I could only conclude it was because of Bella's presence in my life. I was touched at the thought of my family doing everything they could to minimise the risk of having a human in our midst. Moving into the forest I broke into a run, my gaze tracking left and right as I tasted the air. Four miles away from the house I caught the scent I was seeking and let it pull me forward.

By the time I returned to the cabin a few hours later I felt almost satisfied. Perhaps Carlisle had a point. The forests we were in were well populated with game; I could drink my fill and hunt at another one of our preferred locations for the next few months while nature re-established the balance.

Pushing the cabin door open I strolled inside and threw myself carelessly onto one of the sofas, shooting Esme an apologetic look as the frame gave an ominous creak.

_Just once I'd like to have a sofa last more than a few months_, Esme sighed to herself.

I squirmed lower in my seat and got a sympathetic grimace from Emmett: he'd had to replace the last four.

_Still, it's nice to see him act like a boy,_ Esme went on and I rolled my eyes at her dotage, aware that I was merely reinforcing the stereotype but unable to help myself.

"How was it?" Emmett asked as he jerked his head towards the door.

"Good," I grunted as I put my feet up on the coffee table. Normally this sort of behaviour wouldn't be allowed at home, but the furniture here was a little … sturdier, or at least more disposable. Even so it didn't stop Esme from giving a quiet _tsk_ that guilted me into putting my feet back on the floor. I got up and began to pace the room, shrugging off invitations to play Guitar Hero or watch a movie; nothing seemed to appeal, nothing held any interest. Crossing to the bookshelves I glanced at the books on offer. Esme had re-stocked the shelves since we had been here last and so the floor to ceiling bookshelves held a vast array of hundreds of new releases. I didn't feel like reading either.

Rosalie had taken a seat on one of the couches with a pile of fashion magazines. Alice had curled up behind her and was playing with Rosalie's hair, peering over her shoulder to give a running commentary on which trends would last.

"Yes … yes … _definitely_ not, it wasn't even good the last three times, you've already got one of those," Alice leaned over to tap a page with a satisfied smile, "and _yours_ is vintage."

I leaned back in my seat and watched my family; studying them carefully and noting the subtle differences that I would see manifesting in each of them. Esme was sitting near Carlisle as she perused some cookbooks, no doubt intending to prepare more human meals now that she had discovered her offerings had been accepted with such enthusiasm. Rosalie was submitting to Alice's attentions with more grace now that she was no longer the only release valve for Alice's creativity. I felt a surge of pride that it was Bella – _my Bella_ – who had been the catalyst for such simple yet profound changes in the household.

Jasper cleared his throat as he shot me an amused look. He was sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table with a pile of history books and a laptop as he took notes. He had always avowed that he would never write a book and yet in light of his discussion with Bella he seemed to be reviewing his options. It made me miss her all the more, but I had committed to spending some time with the family and attending to my more easily satisfied biological needs.

After my fourth sigh Carlisle looked up from his book to regard me with an indulgent smile.

_Edward, how are you feeling?_

I glanced across at him and raised an eyebrow. Did he really need to ask? Carlisle nodded to concede the point and carefully rested the book on his lap. It was an original manuscript in his father's hand and was one of his most precious possessions. Carlisle could have recited the book by heart.

_You're at least looking a lot better than you were,_ he ventured after a thoughtful pause. _Do you feel you've eaten enough?_

The question was voiced seriously enough and I sat for a moment to take stock of the situation. The ever-present burn at the back of my throat had dropped to tolerable levels and I knew that with some further judicious hunting it would dissipate even further. Of course the moment I caught Bella's scent again the burn would re-ignite but at least my hunger could be contained enough to keep her safe.

"I'll hunt again," I admitted and I could hear the reluctance in my voice. I had hoped to return to Bella sooner but with Carlisle advocating such caution it seemed prudent to accept his guidance.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I dug it out immediately. A quick glance at my watch confirmed that Bella was in a lecture and should have been paying attention to the lesson. I smiled; it seemed that Bella was feeling the separation as much as I was. The day was nearly over and yet Bella and I had managed to keep up a running commentary with each other as often as we could.

_Day is done am going home like the well behaved girl I am. Miss u x B_

I smiled at the handset and looked away from her simple message only when Emmett chuckled.

"Man, you've got it bad."

"Like you can talk," I replied absently as I sent a return message.

_Be safe. Miss you x E_

"He has a point there, Emmett, your brother is a wise man," Rosalie commented without looking up from her magazine pages. She smiled seconds later as Emmett appeared at her side to nuzzle at her throat, making her giggle. Alice seemed likewise drawn to Jasper who accepted her attentions with a knowing grin. He caught my stare and a flicker of his eyelid told me that he was behind the sudden surge in bonhomie that was permeating the room. Even Carlisle and Esme were holding hands now, exchanging the type of smile that indicated they would be absenting themselves from the cabin sometime soon.

_Sorry, Edward_, Jasper sent to me, _but when you're thinking about Bella the mood is too good not to share._

A couple of hours later my phone chimed again.

_Going to bed now. Lonely without you B x_

Despite my best efforts I sighed again, wishing that I could wrap myself around her warmth and watch her sleep the night away. I would miss listening to her sleepy whispers that she had no knowledge of the following morning; I had long appointed myself the guardian of her somnambulant offerings.

"That's it," Emmett announced as he stood up and tossed the game remote aside. "Come on, Bro, let's go for a run."

"A run?" I scoffed at his suggestion. It was a well-established fact that I was the fastest in the family, "You think you can keep up?"

"I might be able to slow you down with a few well-aimed trees," Emmett countered with an evil grin.

"Done," I said as I got to my feet. The run would do me good, and would help the hours go a little faster. "I'll hunt on the way back." The two of us headed towards the door. "How far do you want to go?"

"I don't care, as long as you stop with the sighing," Emmett said, cuffing the back of my head as I passed him.

"Hey," I objected, ducking my head and swatting his abs.

"Ohh," he followed me through the door, "that's right, _don't touch the hair_," he intoned.

"Bite me," I muttered as we stepped out onto the porch.

"Catch me," Emmett shot back as he took off at a lope that quickly became an all-out sprint.

I passed him in seconds, and we'd run through three counties before he managed to catch up.

By the time we returned to the cabin all but drunk on the euphoria of running and a successful hunt the sky was bright overhead. Stepping inside I saw that people had barely moved, although now Jasper sat typing in earnest at his laptop and Esme was getting a pedicure from Rosalie.

"Look at you," Alice said admiringly, "that must have been quite an outing you two had."

"Like you wouldn't know," I grinned at her. Alice wrinkled her nose at me and then poked out her tongue, squealing when I ducked down and blew a raspberry on her neck as I passed.

"Now, now," Jasper called after me without shifting his gaze from the screen, "don't go riling my gal, that's my job."

"Bet he hasn't done _that_ to Bella yet," Rosalie commented with a sly smile.

"Give him time," Esme gave me a fond look, basking in the teasing banter.

Ignoring their jibes I got out my phone. Bella would be heading into lecture soon enough and I wasn't about to risk calling her and have her try to talk on the phone and drive at the same time. I didn't care how many times she pointed out all the other people that did it, I wanted her as safe as possible.

_Good morning my Bella. Will be home soon. Miss you, hope you have a good day x E_

I stood waiting for Bella's reply and sure enough it came through promptly enough.

_Having a coffee b4 work. Miss u x B_

"Hey, Alice," I said in a quiet voice, "are you-,"

"Looking out for your girl? Sure," Alice replied. "All good, no need to worry."

I was about to reply when Alice frowned and her gaze turned inward. She blinked a few times and then looked again, cocking her head as if to get a better angle on whatever it was that only she could see. Jasper hissed and his gaze snapped towards his mate as her mood spiked.

"Edward," Alice looked at me, her face blank with shock. "It's Bella-,"

"I know, she just said she'll be-,"

"Gone, she's _gone_, Edward."

"What?" I convulsively gripped the cell phone and didn't even notice it snap in my hand.

_There goes another one, I just home the SIM card is …_ Jasper sighed in the back of my mind as he moved to inspect the shrapnel that had fallen to the floor. Alice got up from the table and began to pace, her movements jerky with disbelief.

"One minute I could _see_ her and then next-," Alice waved a hand as she wheeled to look at Jasper who immediately moved to her side. "Edward," this time it sounded like a wail, "Bella's gone."

"Not possible," I ground out. "What did you see?"

"Not enough," Alice was wringing her hands as she fluttered between panic and guilt. "I barely had time to see her before he arrived."

That got everyone's attention.

"Who? James?" I was already moving towards the door before Alice could finish speaking. She and Jasper followed, Emmett bringing up the rear.

_Someone I haven't seen before,_ Alice clarified. Speaking was meaningless noise now, all I could focus on was finding Bella. Alice knew that and spoke directly to my mind as we sprinted towards my car and got in. I started the car and wheeled it around to speed down the driveway towards the main road. _Not one of us, and she was pleased to see him._

Alice had caught a brief glimpse of someone before Bella had disappeared. A man with russet hair, warm olive toned skin and a broad smile of welcome as he jogged towards Bella with his arms outstretched. Someone human.

* * * * *

**I know I'm not a huge one for comments as I post this story, but I hope it's continuing to entertain you all so far. Thanks for joining me on the journey. S x **


	16. Chapter 16

**Songlines Ch16**

"Maybe she'll be alright," Alice ventured after a long silence in the car. "Whoever it was she seemed happy to see him." We had been driving around down in a careful grid search pattern as I scanned minds hoping for a glimpse of Bella.

"Show me again," I snapped as I drove, watching the images that Alice shared with me. This time I paid careful attention to the background of their setting. Alice replayed her vision for me an

"Those pillars," I said at last, "she might be on campus."

Alice looked again. "Maybe," she said dubiously, "but if it is then she's skipped her morning lecture."

"That's not like her, is it?" Jasper asked, puzzled.

"No, but that's Bella," I sighed as I turned the car around and drove back towards the college, "always doing the unexpected." There still remained the question of how Bella had somehow managed to disappear from Alice's vision. We made our way to campus quickly enough but the challenge therein was the matter of finding our way to where Alice had last seen Bella. I looked down as Alice hesitantly laid her hand on my arm as I drove.

"It's no use," Alice said in an apologetic tone, "the weather isn't going to let up today and I can't see any options that get us there without being seen."

"Inhuman strength and speed and yet here we are trapped by a few sunbeams," Jasper commented from the backseat, "there's a kind of irony in that."

I growled deep in my throat and Jasper immediately sent a wave of calm rolling over me that I welcomed and resented all at once. I'd come this far; I couldn't risk losing control now.

"Steering wheel, Edward," Alice said without turning her head.

Glancing at my hands I could see the plastic moulding beginning to give and instantly slackened my grip. The sooner we found Bella the sooner I would be able to relax.

* * * * *

"There," Alice sighed with relief, "she's okay."

I nodded, but didn't trust myself to say anything as I stood clenching and unclenching my fists as they hung at my side. It had taken us nearly an hour to get to where Alice had seen her last, an eternity during which I had imagined the harm that could have befallen Bella, and now for all that I could see her she was still out of reach. I felt a swell of anger at my inability to rush to her to assure myself that she was all right.

"Alice," Jasper managed, "I've got to ... I can't-," he stopped and took a step away from me.

As soon as I saw the struggle on his face my rage began to subside. As the emotional barometer of the family Jasper had endured my morose attitude for a few days only to be further assaulted with fear and rage. Alice was still watching the laughing couple enjoying the afternoon.

"I can't see her," Alice said in a puzzled voice.

Jasper and I looked at Alice in surprise.

"I know she's _there_," Alice jerked a hand at the café table, "but I can't _see_ her, Edward. Something's wrong."

I frowned at this and took an involuntary step towards them, stopping only when Jasper grabbed at my sleeve.

"You can't," he hissed.

I growled deep in my throat but relented and stepped back, staying well within the shade.

"This is ridiculous," I snarled, clenching my fists again as I watched the _boy_ reach up and ruffle Bella's hair as if teasing a puppy. Bella swatted his hand away with a pout and shook her finger at him in admonishment although she laughed as she did so. Their voices carried to us with agonising clarity.

"C'mon, Bells, it'll be great. You know everyone would love to see you. Sue has a spare bed and you can stay with us for a few days."

"I can't, got plans," Bella replied with a secret smile, and seeing that made me feel better, but only by a fraction.

"But how often do we get to catch up?" the boy protested.

"And how often do you put a guilt trip on me when we do?"

"Only because you keep making yourself unavailable," the boy grumbled now, subsiding back into his chair as Bella peeled his hand off her arm with a small smile.

"Not then, not now, not ever," Bella said slowly, "how many times are we going to have to keep going over this?"

"Until you change your mind."

"Jacob, I _know_ your Dad, so I know for a fact he raised you right. When a woman says no, she means _No."_

"Yeah but," the boy – Jacob – shrugged off her words with a laugh as he draped an overly familiar arm around her shoulders and pulled her close for a hug. "Come on, Bells," he said in a low voice as he nuzzled the side of her neck, "you know we'd be good together." He was close enough for me to sense his thoughts and I took an involuntary step forward as the images flashed before me. Bella laughing up at him in bed, dancing in his arms, even – I groaned aloud at this – a succession of small children with wide brown eyes. The vision of Bella nursing a baby in her arms was enough to give me pause as I realised with devastating clarity the one thing that the boy offered her that I could not: a life.

I was only dimly aware of Jasper's dejected sigh beside me as he felt my mood shift and deepen again. Alice gave me an inquiring look that had her turning to Jasper with a determined air and taking him by the hand to shake to get his attention. Jasper turned a mournful gaze towards his mate and sharpened when he saw the angry set of her lips.

"Wha-," he began which was cut short when she seized him to pull him close for a kiss. Within seconds the mood amongst us had taken on a distinct honeyed hue. "Thanks," Jasper offered up a lazy smile when Alice released him at last.

"Anytime," Alice replied in what could best be described as a boudoir drawl as she patted his cheek. "As for you," she pointed at me, "Bella's safe which is what we set out to find. Whatever's going on here," she waved a hand back at Bella who sit sat glowing in the sunlight, "we'll find out soon enough."

"Fine," I grumbled as I began to settle.

_Always the seventeen year old emo when he doesn't know what to do,_ Alice muttered before subsiding at my affronted glare.

I shook off Alice's exasperation to look over in time to see Bella shake off the boy's arm and shift her chair away from his, her posture rigid with displeasure.

"Bella?" the boy's smile faltered, "what's wrong?"

"Jake," Bella started, and I found myself unable to account for her sad smile. "You'll always be a part of my life, you know that, right?"

"Sure," the boy nodded at this but I could see his jaw set in tune with his thoughts; he knew what was coming and had heard it before but it seemed he wasn't about to give up.

"But you can't be _that_ part," Bella went on. "Sorry, Jacob, but I just can't be what you want because you've decided that's the way you want things to be."

"Is there someone else?" His smile faltered now.

Bella simply nodded.

"Is that why you haven't come home lately?"

This time the nod was slower.

"Right," the boy was unimpressed, "so you start seeing someone and family gets forgotten, is _that_ the way it's gonna be?" The boy's tone was angry but his thoughts were afraid. At last he could sense that perhaps Bella was slipping out of reach and his first instinct was to clutch tighter. "C'mon, Dad's been asking after you so why don't you come back to the Res and spend some time there. It'll be fun. Just the two of us."

Bella shot him an exasperated look. "I thought you said your _Dad_ wanted to see me?"

"Well, yeah, him too," the boy amended with what he hoped would be a disarming smile, "and Seth. He's missed you."

"I could tell," Bella admitted with a grudging smile, "the way he ran at me earlier was a pretty good sign."

The boy laughed at this and now I could see what had happened earlier. Bella had been walking across campus when she had looked up at the war whoop from another male, greeting him with a smile of delight that had turned to shocked surprise when Jacob had grabbed her around the waist from behind. None of this explained why she had abruptly vanished from Alice's vision.

"So how about it?" Jacob went on, "You pack a few things and we can head off."

"Excuse me?" Bella shook her head. "There's the matter of classes, and I've got a job to attend to."

"Phsst," the boy shrugged off her explanation, "blow 'em off and come home. It's where you belong."

"Oh really," Bella's expression shifted from patient amusement and I watched as the 'I want' line appeared between her brows. "And what makes you the expert?"

"It's where you've always belonged," the boy gave a determined nod. "What us. With me." He looked on in surprise as Bella got up from her seat and gathered her belongings before walking away. "Where are you going?"

"Anywhere but here," Bella called over her shoulder and kept walking, "and you'd do well to give me some space, Jacob Black."

_Go girl_, Jasper commented, impressed as the boy stood his ground and watched her go. _I can see why you've been so punch drunk since you found her, Edward._

Alice gave a hum of pleasure. "She's back, I can see her now," she noted with satisfaction as she looked up at me, "and if you make your way to the library she'll be very pleased to see you."

I didn't need any more urging.

* * * * *

Once inside the library I paused as I looked around the busy room. Students were clustered everywhere but there was no disguising Bella's sent trail that drew me to her as surely as a compass points to true north. She had taken direct path to a table over near one of the windows and had set out her books and small laptop, all of which sat untouched as she sat running her hands through her ponytail. I paused near one of the library stacks as I watched her, trying to assess her mood. She played with her hair when she was feeling thoughtful but having witnessed her departure from the café I could see that she was angry. Bella was coiling her ponytail around her hand like a whip, flicking it away before reaching for it again. I reached for my phone intending to surprise her and then realised that I had crushed the handset back at the cabin.

Bella pushed her books aside as she leaned forward to rest her head on her forearms with a quiet sigh; and after hearing her tiny sound of distress there was nothing else I could do but step towards her. I reached out and quietly pulled out the empty seat on her blind side, sitting down and reaching out to put my hand on her shoulder. Bella's head jerked up and around in surprise and she gazed at me for a long moment before her expression crumpled. I looked at her with alarm as she clambered out of her seat and over onto my lap to bury her face against my neck. There was nothing for me to do but wrap my arms around her to hold her close.

"I've missed you," I murmured before pressing a soft kiss against the pulse that beat at her neck.

"Not as much as I've missed you," Bella countered. She pulled herself back to smile at me before leaning forward to give me a soft kiss.

"I'm so glad you're here," she said at last, her breath a warm puff against my skin. I nuzzled against her hair already seeking out her scent and then pulled away in alarm. Bella didn't smell like … _Bella._ The scent drenching her was heavy and fetid making her smell like an animal. I pulled her closer again and breathed against her hair taking another surreptitious sniff when I was done. There. My own scent had masked the other somewhat, but I wouldn't be content until Bella had showered and changed. Someone else had been close enough to mark her, and it had to have been the boy. I frowned as I considered the new threat that had appeared in Bella's life. Of course, Bella seemed completely unaware that there was anything untoward going on and again I wondered if the mystery of her closed mind would one day yield its secrets. "Hey," I blinked and realised Bella was watching me. "What's wrong?"

"You smell different," I admitted, "it's strong."

"I do?" Bella grabbed at her ponytail and sniffed at it. "All I can smell is my shampoo and maybe Jake."

"Who is he?" I pounced on the proffered name, eager to find out more.

"An old friend who pushed his luck too far this afternoon," Bella said. Her tone was light enough but she looked disappointed, busying herself by doing and undoing the top button on my shirt.

"Was it good to see him?" I asked in a quiet tone. I was hungry for more information but didn't want to force the issue.

"At first, he and his cousin surprised me this morning so we had coffee but then Jacob got annoying."

"How?" I pulled her a little closer which Bella seemed only too happy to go along with, draping an arm around my shoulders and snuggling against me as she continued to speak.

"Jacob's like extended family, we've known each other for kids and now," she gave a quiet sigh, "he wants more."

I stilled.

"How much more?"

"Everything," Bella looked up at me. "He's got it into his head that we're perfect for each other and has our life all mapped out." She absently reached up to trail a finger down my sideburn, following the line of my jaw before sliding her hand down my chest. "Thing is, he never bargained on me getting my own life away from Forks. Jake stayed on the Reservation and he's totally entrenched in the tribe." Bella gave me an anxious look, "They're wonderful people and I love them like family but now I've gotten a glimpse of what the world is like I-," she broke off and chewed at her lip before going on. "There was a time when Jake would have been enough for me, but now …"

"What is it you want?" I whispered, watching her eyelids flutter as the sweetness of my breath puffed against her face.

"I want more too," she admitted as she looked up and deliberately held my gaze.

_Mine._

"So do I," I confessed and we gazed at each other for a long time.

"So other than Jacob," I was impressed that I was able to say his name without it sounding like a snarl, "what else did I miss?"

"Angela and I ate far more ice-cream and brownies that we thought we could, that was fun," Bella began with a smile, "and I stayed home like a good girl."

"Glad to hear it," I nodded.

"And I missed you, lots," Bella sighed and tucked her head beneath my chin as she reached up to trace a spiral pattern on my chest with the tip of one finger. I closed my eyes against the soft fluttering sensation of her touch. She sighed again and shook her head as if shaking off something unpleasant.

"Are you all right?" I ducked my head to look at her and noticed that she was looking tired. "Have you been sleeping?"

"Not very well," Bella admitted, leaning into my touch as I smoothed some hair off her face. The more I touched her, the more I was erasing Jacob's scent and replacing it with my own. "Can we go?" she ventured after another pause.

"Haven't you got class this afternoon?"

"I don't care," Bella said, "the day hasn't been good but now you're here and it's better so I want to stay happy. Let's go."

I smiled at her petulant expression wanting nothing more than to get out there and spend the day with her, but circumstances were against me.

"Bella, you need to go to class."

"But I've just said-," she began with a frown, stopping when I shook my head. "What's wrong?"

"It's a little awkward for me to get out of here with the weather being as it is," I explained, watching as Bella turned to look out the window at the clear skies outside.

"Oh," she subsided against me, "then maybe we could just stay here for the next couple of hours?"

"You need to study," I pressed gently, "I'll be waiting for you when you finish."

"Today just isn't going my way at all," Bella grumbled, "I should've stayed in bed."

"I think I would have liked that," I ventured and smiled down at her surprise.

"You want me to go to a lecture with a clear head now that you've said _that_?" Bella shook her head.

"You think you're any less distracting to me?" I kissed her temple, shuddering slightly as my body made its wants apparent. Bella could feel it too and shifted against me as she bit her lip. I gazed at her as she curled a tiny hand around my neck to pull me close for a kiss and together we indulged ourselves in a gentle exploration.

_Just look at those two_, the thought intruded and I could tell from the more mature tone of the mental 'voice' that we had drawn the gaze of one of the library staff. I broke away and disentangled myself from Bella with a regretful smile.

"We're getting attention," I explained softly, chuckling when Bella looked over her shoulder and then promptly ducked her head with dismay at the sight of one of the older library staff members shaking her head disapprovingly. Bella promptly slid off my lap and back into her seat and began to gather her books together while an embarrassed flush stained her cheeks.

"You're blushing," I leaned forward to brush a finger across her cheeks.

"Well, I just got caught necking in the library," Bella hissed, the colour in her face increasing with mortification, "it makes me feel like … like …," she waved a hand as she fumbled for the words, "like _Jessica_." Bella put her face in her hands and shook her head with a quiet groan. "She and Tyler used to practically _eat_ each other in here and I used to think it was so gross."

"And now?" I teased.

"I'm beginning to see the attraction," Bella murmured as she lifted her face to mine and I found I was only too happy to oblige her silent request.

All too soon Bella made a graceful – if somewhat reluctant – exit. I stood beside the table and watched her go while my body ached, resolving to call Alice and ask her to keep watch. Again I lamented the destruction of my phone but I had to hope that Alice was monitoring Bella for the remainder of the afternoon. Now I was faced with another conundrum; the matter of making my way off campus without being seen. Fear for Bella's safety had pulled me to her without a moment's hesitation but now the crisis had passed I had a few hours to while away before Bella could return to me and there remained the matter of purchasing a replacement phone.

* * * * *

"So how was hunting?" Bella asked in a drowsy tone. As promised I had been waiting for Bella when her classes had finished and now we were comfortably ensconced in my room at home.

"Good," I murmured at last, almost hypnotised by the motion of combing my fingers through her hair over and over.

_Coming upstairs Edward, are you two decent?_ Alice knocked at the door seconds later.

"It's Alice," I said to Bella's look of inquiry.

"Hey," Alice chirped as she opened the door and poked her head inside. Almost instantly her face wrinkled. "Phew, Bella, what have you been doing? You smell like," Alice stepped into the room and approached Bella to take a cautious sniff before waving her hand in front of her face as if to dispel the odour, "_dog_."

"I do?" Bella pushed herself away from me, "and you didn't say it was that bad," this time Bella's tone was accusatory.

"It's not that bad," Alice tried to soothe her now, "but it's quite .. uh .. distinct."

"But I haven't even been near any dogs," Bella's face was flushed with embarrassment now, "that's it, Edward, take me home. I'll shower and change."

"No no no," Alice rushed in, "I'm sorry Bella, I spoke without thinking. You know how our senses are heightened, I didn't mean to sound rude."

"Relax Alice," Bella sounded weary now, "it's just been that kind of day." She looked at me where I was still sprawled on the leather chaise.

_Edward I'm so sorry,_ Alice was babbling her apologies, her distress plain as she tried to talk Bella into staying.

"Wait," she snapped her fingers, "No need to go home, c'mon, I'll get you a change of clothes and you can change here."

"Are you sure? I don't want to impose," Bella said doubtfully, making me laugh despite the awkwardness of the situation.

"Bella, do you seriously think you're going to be creating hardship for Alice if she gets to dress you up?"

"Well, when you put it that way," Bella began, stopping when Alice disappeared from the room in the blink of an eye, returning with her arms full of enormous fluffy towels.

"Here," Alice handed them over to Bella, and disappeared again to fetch some clothes.

I got up from the chaise and took Bella by the hand to lead her to the bathroom, opening the door and ushering her inside.

"I don't suppose you'd join me?" Bella said with a hopeful smile as she nodded at the generously sized shower stall before laughing openly at my shock.

"There's nothing I'd like more," I said smiling at her surprise, "but it's not-,"

"Safe," she sighed, "I know. Again with the safety talk."

"Make yourself at home," I urged her, "Alice will be in soon with some clothes for you."

Bella nodded and closed the door behind me and a minute later I heard the water start. I stood in my room clenching my fists at the mental vision of Bella standing naked beneath the shower spray, rivulets of foam tracing the curves of her body as she –

_Edward!_ It was Jasper, _That's. Not. Helping._

I sighed and made my way towards Alice's room to find her decanting some shopping bags from her walk in closest as she sang under her breath.

"Edward," she beamed at me apparently having recovered from her social gaffe, "she's going to love these."

I strolled towards the bed where Alice was piling up the bags and reached in to retrieve something soft. To my embarrassment I found myself holding a brassiere, an exquisite concoction of lace and ribbon that I would already visualise on Bella. I dropped it immediately and stepped away from the bag as if it contained a nest of vipers.

"Easy there, Edward," Alice giggled, "you'll see it all soon enough."

"Alice," I growled a warning.

"They're all her size," Alice blithely went on ignoring me, "I've been shopping for her for a while now. Take the bags in and tell her to take her pick."

"I told her you'd take them in," I mumbled as I kept backing away from the bags.

"Chicken," Alice chided me as she swept past me towards the bathroom leaving me to stand and watch as she tapped quietly against the door before being admitted.

I was downstairs talking to Jasper when Bella re-appeared wearing the clothes Alice had purchased for her; jeans, t-shirt and a fluffy cardigan in the colours she liked best, and a pair of soft leather boots. Her hair was wet but had been combed off her face to hang limply against her back and her face had been freshly scrubbed.

"You look great," Alice praised from her seat on one of the couches, "did everything fit okay?"

"Perfectly, thanks," Bella smiled as she look my hand and sank down beside me, "but next time, _tell_ me I reek, okay?"

"I couldn't," I replied in a shocked voice, "it wouldn't be gentlemanly."

"And it's ladylike of me to reek enough to turn your stomach?" Bella protested.

"Well," I temporised.

"Who have you been around today, Bella?" Alice asked as she leaned forward in her seat. She already knew of course, but was fishing for details as much as I was.

"Just a couple of old friends," Bella waved a hand, "family friends actually, from Forks."

"Is there anything," Alice gave a delicate pause and I silently applauded her tenacity when it came to asking the questions that I found myself unwilling to voice, "different about them?"

"Compared to you guys? I wouldn't think so," Bella laughed.

"There must be something," Alice coaxed.

"Well," Bella frowned in thought, "they're from the Quileute Tribe." She shrugged. "Make of that what you will, and in the meantime I guess the next time I see Jake I'll make sure I'm upwind."

_The wolf tribe?_ Jasper and I exchanged a glance and he gave a slight nod before excusing himself and wandering off upstairs towards Carlisle's study. Bella had given us another piece to today's puzzle and I knew that Carlisle for one would be intrigued. We had last encountered their tribe seventy years ago and had been grateful to discover that the treaty had remained intact in the tribe's oral history. The fact that Bella vanished from Alice's vision however meant that we were entering new territory.

Bella lifted her head at one point to sniff the air and then twisting in her seat to peer over the back of the couch towards the kitchen again.

"Esme's cooking again," she commented with satisfaction, "it smells incredible."

"It does?" I glanced at Bella who nodded in confirmation.

_I'm glad someone here appreciates my efforts_, Esme replied, making me smile.

"It smells like it has wine in it, and lots of rosemary," Bella went on.

_Lamb ragout_, Esme supplied and I passed her message on to Bella who looked suitably impressed.

"What's she making?" Jasper asked having reappeared from upstairs.

"It's a French lamb casserole," Bella explained.

Jasper slumped back onto the sofa and allowed Alice to wriggle and climb her way onto his lap, submitting to her attentions with an easy-going grace that impressed me more with each passing day. I had seen Jasper's memories of the battles he had endured, both the blurry human experiences and the seemingly endless carnage of his early vampire life. The very fact that he could now sit with his mate curled lovingly against him as she kissed him until he smiled so that she could kiss his dimples, while another vampire sat opposite embracing a human was nothing short of remarkable.

"I don't remember lamb," Jasper commented as Alice squirmed into a more comfortable position, "or any human foods for that matter."

"Oh Jasper," Bella mourned, "that's really sad to hear."

Jasper waved away her concern. "From what I've read of food during the Civil War I don't think there was much good to remember."

Bella wriggled around on the cushion that she was kneeling beside me, the better to gaze at us and into the kitchen to see what Esme was doing.

"How about you?" she asked me.

"Some," I frowned as I tried to remember, "I remember the last thing I ate at home but it was weak, maybe a broth of some kind. I think my mother made it for me when I started to get sick."

Esme appeared in the doorway wiping her hands on a dishcloth that she draped over the back of a chair as she approached with a small steaming bowl in her hands.

"Here you are," she said as she handed the bowl and fork to Bella, "careful, it might be hot."

Bella accepted the bowl with a smile of thanks and held it under her nose to take a deep sniff. "Lamb ragout with mash potato," she said in tones of vast satisfaction, "Esme I think I love you."

"That means she likes it," I translated to a beaming Esme.

"As if you need to tell her that," Bella nudged me with her elbow as she began eating. "So, back to food," Bella said in between mouthfuls, "how about you, Esme, do you remember much?"

"Not very much at all," Esme admitted as she took a seat on the arm of the couch , "certainly not the taste, but now that I've been cooking for you I'm getting flashes of what must be memories of preparing meals." Esme gave a reminiscent smile.

"Is it odd, preparing meat?" Bella cocked her head as she regarded Esme. There was nothing interrogatory or challenging in her tone, she was simply curious. Esme thought for a moment before answering.

"Well, it certainly stays still more than other meat I'm used to," she said at last, startling a whoop of laughter out of Jasper.

"I really don't want to be a bother, so please don't feel you have to put yourself in any discomfort on my account," Bella offered with an apologetic grimace.

"Of course, Bella," Esme smiled her gratitude.

_I may take her up on that offer Edward, the meat is a little … challenging._ I caught a glimpse of the meat oozing blood as Esme cut in to it, all the while trying not to breathe. As soon as the meat was cooked it immediately lost all appeal but the preparation beforehand made for an unexpected challenge.

"Jasper," Bella was laughing now, "pick a channel, I'm begging you."

Jasper had been scrolling through the cable channel selection at a blur but at Bella's plea he immediately stopped and set the remote control aside. He had stopped at a news channel and Bella subsided against me to watch the screen out of curiosity, stilling a moment later as she put a hand on my arm to get my attention. The fork clattered into her bowl and Esme silently reached forward to take the bowl out of Bella's hands and place it on the coffee table.

It was a short news report of a grisly find: another human body had turned up in the woods and but all accounts the death had been quite recent. The young woman had been reported missing just two days prior and she had been found seemingly discarded on the banks of a riverbed near a hiking trail. The news report included a recent photo supplied by her family and Bella put a hand to her mouth in shock when she saw her face.

"You knew her?" I asked as Bella subsided against me.

She nodded her head without shifting her gaze from the screen. "She's a friend of Angela's."

I stiffened at this piece of news, and saw Jasper and Alice instantly give their full attention to Bella who was still staring mesmerised at the screen as the report continued. The girl's parents appeared as they tearfully pleaded for anyone with information to come forward.

"Oh no," Bella moaned, "poor Angela." She began patting her pockets and then got to her feet. "I need to call her, my phone's upstairs," she said as she disappeared.

We all watched her go and then began to talk in tones pitched too low for her to hear.

"Do you think it could be another one of us? A nomad?" asked Jasper.

"Too early to tell," I replied as the news story ended and shifted smoothly to the next, a puff piece aimed at boosting the morale of viewers after the dire report, "but we'll have to find out."

"Lonnie?" Jasper asked again.

I shook my head at this. "Not possible, after his last encounter with Emmett he turned himself in. He's in jail awaiting trial so we won't be seeing him anytime soon. No," I shook my head, "but I don't like the feel of this. Alice?"

Alice shook her head as she crawled further onto Jasper's lap, a gesture she made when she was seeking comfort. She curled up tucking her head underneath Jasper's chin, closing her eyes as he stroked her back and murmured nonsense to her. After a long moment she opened her eyes and looked at me.

"All I can see is blurred, it's just flashes but there's a common theme," she said with considerable reluctance.

"Anyone we know?" I asked although I already knew the answer.

This time Alice's nod was very reluctant indeed.

"Bella," she admitted.

As if hearing her name Bella appeared on the landing with her phone held to her ear as she carefully made her way down the stairs as she spoke to Angela. She gave me a look of distress as she sat down on the couch and the rest of us watched her silently as she continued her conversation. We would all hear Angela perfectly well through the small receiver.

"I just don't understand," Angela's voice was hoarse as if she had been crying earlier, "who would want to kill Lauren?"

_Lauren_. We had a name now.

"When did you last see her?"

"Just a few days ago," Angela went on, "she and I went to a movie the night you stayed over at Edward's. She crashed at our place for the night, slept in your bed. Oh god," this time Angela's voice was nearly a wail, "I didn't even think to ask if that was okay with you."

"It's okay, Angela," Bella soothed.

"Next morning," Angela hiccupped around a fresh wave of tears, "she couldn't get her sister to come pick her up, so she was going to walk home and catch up with us later. Do you think that was when-,"

"Angela I just don't know," Bella leaned forward and put her head in her hands as she kept listening to her friend's broken apologies and explanations.

Over Bella's head, Jasper met my gaze with perfect clarity. Lauren had slept in Bella's bed, which meant she had left the next day drenched in Bella's distinctive scent. This was no accident.

_Someone else may have been at Bella's apartment,_ Jasper suggested, _we're going to have to go see._

"Angela where are you now?" Bella was asking.

"I'm with Ben. I didn't know when you were coming home and I didn't want to be alone," Angela admitted.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry. I can come home right now," Bella looked at me for confirmation and I nodded.

"No I'm okay, you stay where you are," Angela snuffled. There was a murmured conversation in the background. "Ben wants to make sure you won't be alone tonight."

"I'm with Edward, but we'll go home soon," Bella assured her and looked at me, "Edward will stay with me tonight."

"Good," Angela's reply was swift. "Bella, I can't believe this has happened."

"Neither can I," Bella admitted. The conversation after that was brief and by the time she finished the call her fingertips were cold.

Esme appeared with a cup of hot tea and a cashmere wrap that was draped around Bella's shoulders with loving care.

"Bella I'm so sorry about your friend," Esme said in a soft voice.

"She slept in my bed," Bella replied in a faraway voice. "I knew her, she slept in my bed and now she's gone." She looked at each of us in turn and we met her gaze with equally solemn expressions. "Edward," she reached for me as I reached for her, "take me home."

* * * * *

Bella was shivering as she unlocked the door to her apartment and I stood as close to her as possible with my arm around her waist. She opened the door and took a deep breath before stepping inside. The apartment was quiet and still, no hint whatsoever that it had been the precursor to a murder. Bella stood with her arms wrapped around herself as she slowly walked around the apartment leaving her bedroom until last. I matched her pace, holding her close as her eyes darted around the room. It wasn't until we entered her bedroom that my head snapped up in instant recognition.

He had been here.

Without realising it a growl began in my chest as I stepped towards the window to sniff at the frame. I turned my back to Bella's wondering gaze and flickered my tongue, tasting the air to find the faintest trace of his scent. I closed my eyes, the better to focus my attention on the scent trail stepping carefully to the right to follow the minute air currents in the room. There. He had paused beside the bed. I bent over and sniffed at her pillow where her scent was strongest. There was another scent there, Lauren's, but it could not compete with Bella's. There was a hint of barley and wood smoke, suggesting that Lauren had been drinking before she went to sleep for the night. I sniffed again. Something else. James had left a distinct scent marker for me to find. I followed its outlines and realised he had rested his open palm against the pillow and this time I could smell blood. Post mortem then. He had come back after the kill, perhaps realising that he had the wrong person.

"Edward?" the question was a whisper and as I looked up Bella took an involuntary step back, reaching blindly for the doorframe as if seeking support.

"Bella," I reached out for her and frowned as she took another step back.

"Your eyes," she choked, "they're black."

I squeezed my eyes closed and shook my head as I tried to calm the murderous rage that had overwhelmed me at the thought of James being so close to Bella.

"I'm sorry," I stammered and waved a hand at her, "stay back. I'll be fine just … stay where you are."

"O-okay," Bella nodded and went perfectly still. I could hear her heartbeat thrumming in the room as I continued to track the scent. I was meticulous in my search and when at last I stood back and gave an explosive sigh Bella sagged a little where she stood. "Is it safe?" she ventured in a timid voice.

There was nothing more I could find out here. I shot her a sideways glance and gave a weary nod, looking up in surprise when she crossed the room as quickly as she could to wrap herself around me.

"Do you want to go home?" I said at last.

"I am home," her reply was muffled against my chest, "and you don't have a bed."

"That can be fixed," I replied as I rested my cheek against her hair and started to rock her slightly where we stood.

"More shopping for Alice," Bella mumbled, "that'll make her happy."

"That it will," I agreed. "If you don't want to stay here then Esme can make you a bed on the couch at home, or maybe a hotel," I suggested.

"No, I want to stay here. With you," Bella looked up at me, "but I need to change the sheets." She shivered again and tightened her hold around my waist.

"Let's get ready then," I looked down at her, "and then maybe you can have a hot shower to get warm," I offered a wry smile, "I'd love to keep you warm but my abilities are somewhat limited."

"I'll get the sheets," Bella sighed as she slipped out of my arms with reluctance and opened her closet. Bella stripped the bed in short order and stuffed the sheets into a laundry bag that she carried out to the living room. She returned to see me holding up the hem of a sheet with uncertainty. "Edward, how long since you made a bed?"

"More time than I care to admit," I muttered as I followed Bella's amused instructions. Soon the bed was made and I watched as Bella found a small bottle of perfume that she sprayed around the room. The perfume merely served to add another layer of scent without erasing any of them but I could see that Bella felt better for it. She gathered a fresh change of clothes and excused herself from the room for her second shower of the evening. I paced to her bedroom window and opened it to lean out into the night. The moment I did so I knew he was there. I ducked back in and turned my head towards the bathroom to listen to Bella. The splashing dipped in volume that told me she had just stepped under the spray. Perhaps there was enough time. I eased myself over the windowsill and dropped to the ground below. I stayed in a crouch as I searched the area before me.

"I know you're here," I challenged, "show yourself."

"I think I get it now," James appeared from the shadows although he kept a cautious distance. "You've got some sort of fascination with your food."

"She_. Is. Not. Food,_" I snarled.

"So I see," James smiled again. "I have to give you credit for managing to resist for so long. Her scent is truly delicious unlike her friend," he went on, the unspoken 'alas' hanging in the air. "Still, it was a way of passing the time."

"The last time we met I encouraged you to move on," I straightened up but kept my back to the building as I watched James stroll back and forth. "You would do well to stay away, your activities are drawing unwelcome attention."

James gave an unrepentant shrug. "And yet somehow you don't give in," he cocked his head as he regarded me. "Maintaining a human façade, and all the while watching the little charming things they do, running around listening to the ticking beats of their eventual demise. That's fine," he shrugged with an oily smile, "I guess everyone needs a hobby."

"If you hurt her I swear it will be the last thing you do," I snarled.

The instant James's smile widened at my words I knew I had made a mistake. A challenge was something he had been looking for all this time and now I had delivered one right into his hands.


	17. Chapter 17

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight_

**Songlines Ch17**

"Leave now," I growled. "She's nothing to you."

"And everything to you," James said after a considered pause, "and yet she's still human. Most intriguing." His eyes glittered as his thoughts darted from one possibility to the next. I had no idea of my gift and so I could scan him as freely as I wished and what I could see gave me pause. We had serious trouble of that I was sure. James was a tracker and it seemed his skills were unparalleled. There would be nowhere we could hide Bella that he would not find her, and no lengths he would not go to in his quest to end the hunt. I was going to have to call his bluff.

"She's an amusement, nothing more."

"Of course," James openly mocked me now. "One you could cast aside I'm sure."

"Naturally," I inclined my head.

"Interesting," James murmured, "perhaps we should explore that."

"What do you propose?" I kept my tone as neutral as possible grateful for the first time in years that my body could produce no adrenaline, no telltale pheromone markers that would betray my fear to the man standing in front of me.

"I have to say it's interesting to find a group of our kind that are so settled," James strolled a few paces to one side lifting his head and sniffing the air with a low growl as he picked up an appetising scent before glancing back at me. "Why do you do it?"

"The nomadic lifestyle isn't for everyone," I shrugged, "and our alternate diet allows certain … privileges."

"So I see," James nodded as he cast another speculative glance towards Bella's bedroom window, "privileges you've taken advantage of, I trust?"

A growl ripped at the back of my throat before I could stop it and James acknowledged it with a slight nod.

"Apparently not. Very interesting," he whispered.

_Still talking, what's caught his interest this time?_

The thought had come from my left although I was careful not to betray that I had sensed anything. A stray breeze brushed my face and I lifted head to taste the air, a move that allowed me my first sight of her.

She padded silently towards us, her red curls tumbling over her shoulders as she strolled to stand beside James with a proprietary air. Like James she was dressed in an eclectic mix of old and new styles; perhaps some items from their past and others appropriated from more recent meals. She wore a corset that looked to be authentic with a more modern fake white fur coat that rippled in the night air as if it was breathing. The two hunters stood side by side as they exchanged a brief smile of satisfaction before turning to regard me still standing guard beneath Bella's window like a toy soldier.

"Victoria," James smiled as he lifted a hand to trail a finger along her cheek and she leaned into it with a soft purr, "this is the one I told you about."

"So I see," she graced me with a lazy smile. "He doesn't look very pleased to see us."

"What did you expect?" I lowered my guard enough to snap the question at her. "My family has worked hard to blend in and your irresponsible _snacking_," I bit out the word with distaste, "is drawing unwanted attention."

"So dull," Victoria pouted at James.

"Perhaps," James replied and he stared at me as Victoria curled against his side and began to trail open-mouthed kisses against his throat, nipping at his skin with a faint smile, "but I think we've learned all we can for the moment." He took Victoria by the hand and began to stroll away from me, away from the house and the streetlight outside and into the night.

"We're leaving?" Victoria sounded disappointed, "but I thought you said we could play."

"We will," James assured her as he slid his arm around her waist to pull her closer to him, "provided that they do too."

"I'm curious as to your expectations," I called after him in a voice that would not carry to any human ears in the vicinity. "After all," I continued with what I hoped was a convincing smile as James stopped and turned to face me, Victoria still pressed against his side, "we've not established the state of play we're about to engage in."

James' thoughts were a fraction of a second ahead of his mouth and yet they still hit me with the force of a body blow.

"Leave your human," he suggested, "cast her aside like you say you can."

"I see," I nodded, pretending to give the matter some thought, "and if I don't what are the alternatives?"

James gave me a slow smile as he nuzzled the side of Victoria's neck. "Leave your little pet behind, or we stay."

I didn't move, there were no flickers of my eyes to give me away and yet James's thoughts were already triumphant.

"Very well," I shrugged, "I accept your terms, provided she and others here remain untouched."

"Really," James narrowed his eyes again as he studied me where I stood. "You gave in easier than I thought. Why is that?"

I raised an eyebrow at him and felt my lips twist into a smile I didn't feel. "My family has invested a lot of time in this area. It would be good to return here at a later date without any negative associations to deal with." I gave him a meaningful look, "I'm sure you've been denied return visits to hunting grounds in the past because of undue local interest."

James weighed my suggestion and gave a slow nod. "True," he muttered at last, "even in this technological age local folklore as a way of maintaining a grip on the populace."

"Ah," I relied, "so you too have had circumstances were you've fed well but not wisely."

"Some," he admitted grudgingly.

I allowed myself the luxury of a mocking tsk and shook my head at him. "I would have thought that someone of your experience would manage things better than that."

"True," James nodded as he acknowledged my hit, "it seems that various oral histories linger more effectively than I would have suspected, although the nomadic lifestyle and depravity of human nature make excellent bedfellows."

"Touché," I murmured as I took a step backwards towards the wall of the building. "I suppose this is where we take our leave of each other."

"Momentarily," James smiled. "Victoria and I will stay long enough to see that you have followed through on your word."

"Just as I will be monitoring the area to ensure that you have kept yours," I nodded.

"Of course," James bowed at me and Victoria swept me an ironic curtsey before they turned and melted away into the evening.

The conversation had only taken a moment but I was all too aware that Bella was upstairs getting ready for bed, thinking that I was sitting waiting patiently for her. Which was how she found me when she appeared dressed for sleep with slightly damp hair curling at her temples. I stood and watched as she crawled onto her bed and fumbled for the covers like a sleepy child. She smiled up at me and extended a hand in silent invitation. I sat on the bed beside her and watched as she fussed about and got comfortable.

"What're you doing all the way over there?" she asked although I sat no more than a foot away.

"My apologies," I shifted closer.

"C'mere," Bella tried to muffle a yawn as she grasped my shirtsleeve to pull me down beside her and threw an arm over my chest as if to secure me to her not realising that all it took was a smile to anchor me to her side. We lay in silence for a few beats but Bella's restless shifting told me that she was not yet ready to settle. "Can you still smell her?" Bella ventured at last.

"Yes," I admitted.

"Anything else?" Bella shifted against my shoulder to look up at me, watching my face for any reaction.

"Yes," I sighed now.

"Anyone we know?" Bella's hand clutched at my shirt.

"Someone known to both of us," I said at last. "Someone who was looking for you."

"Oh," Bella's face puckered and she buried her head against my neck not caring when I felt her tears begin. "So this is my fault."

"No," I carefully grasped Bella's shoulders to move her away from me so that I could see her face. Already her eyes and nose were going red from crying, and she raised a hand to rub at her face with a wet, snuffling sound and yet she still looked beautiful to me. "If blame is due anywhere you should blame me."

"Why?" Bella snorted with disbelief and then shook her head disgustedly before reaching for her bedside table for a tissue to dab at her face.

"If I hadn't been with you he would never have known you even existed," I went on, "I'm the one putting you in danger. I've got to keep you safe."

"We've gone over this before, I can look after myself," Bella retorted as she reached for me. "We'll think of something."

"Yes," I nodded slowly. "I will."

I lie beside her and stroked her hair until she fell asleep and then stared sightlessly at the ceiling as I considered our options all the while knowing in my heart of hearts what had to be done.

* * * * *

"You're not coming to class?" Bella paused before getting out of the car after I had pulled into the parking lot.

"No," I made myself act casual, "I have several matters to attend to."

"My, aren't we formal today," Bella pulled a face at me and then gave me an impudent wink. "Must be those old fashioned manners coming out again."

"Something like that," I allowed with a nod.

Bella was about to open her door when she paused and looked back at me. "Will I see you later? Between classes maybe?"

"Unfortunately not, but I'll see you at the end of the day," I offered as I reached out and brushed her hair off her forehead. Bella made an appreciative humming sound and leaned into my touch.

"Is there something you're not telling me?" Bella asked as she gazed at me.

"Yes," I admitted, "but I'll tell you later."

"Is it a surprise?" Bella's face was alive with curiosity and I hated myself for what I was about to do.

"You'll find out," I teasingly tapped the tip of her nose with my finger and then got out of the car so that I could open her door for her.

"So I'll see you later," Bella ran her hands up my chest and leaned in for a kiss. Giving in to my own inevitable desires I submitted and allowed her to pull me against her as she leaned against the side of the car and pulled me closer still. Our lips touched and parted before going back for more and she teased my bottom lip with her tongue before I shook my head in mock resignation at her as I pulled away.

"Party pooper," she pouted at me.

"Go, learn," I admonished as I pointed a finger towards the crop of buildings where I knew she had her first lecture.

"Yes _Sir_," she snapped an efficient salute at me, grinning at my surprise. "Jasper," she explained, "he's shown me a thing or too."

"So long as that's all he's showing you," I mumbled, ducking my head at her gurgle of laughter. "Now go, I'll be waiting when you finish this afternoon."

* * * * *

True to my word I was leaning against the side of my Volvo when Bella appeared amongst a cluster of students as they made their way towards the rows of parked cars. Bella was deep in conversation with Angela but I saw her raise her head and scan the lot, her face lighting up when she saw me. She lifted an arm and gave me a wave before murmuring something to Angela and clutching her tightly for a hug. Angela was clutching Ben's hand and looking vulnerable. Lauren's death had been a shock to them all but it made me feel somewhat reassured to see how supportive they were being of each other. Bella had good friends around her; friends that she was going to need.

"Hey," Bella greeted as she got close enough to launch herself into my arms for a kiss.

"Good day?" I asked as I opened the car door and waited until she was safely stowed before clicking it shut and getting in on the driver's side.

"Not really," Bella grimaced. "The police were on campus wanting to talk to everyone that Lauren had been with recently, Angela spent a couple of hours with them but she really didn't have anything of much use to tell them other than Lauren had crashed at ours for the night."

"Right," I gunned the engine and the car pulled out smoothly into traffic. "Is Angela holding up okay?"

"She keeps blaming herself," Bella said with a sad little sigh. "Who knows? If Angela had been able to get Lauren to wait until they could arrange a lift for her maybe she wouldn't have tried to walk home, maybe it could have been avoided."

"Perhaps," I nodded.

"You don't think?" Bella twisted in her seat to look at me.

"I don't know," I admitted. That much was true but I had to trust that James and Victoria would be leaving the area soon. Nomadic vampires tended not to be territorial but they could at least respect hunting ground privileges. Even they had to hunt in a sustainable way without arousing suspicion where possible.

Bella stared out of the window and then looked back at me. "Where are we going?"

"Somewhere nice," I glanced at her, "I thought you might like a change of scene."

"Oh," Bella nodded and then looked up as realisation hit, "the meadow? Good," she sighed with satisfaction at my nod.

"So what else happened today?" I asked.

"Jake came by for another visit," Bella admitted in a grudging gone.

"Ah," I nodded and then mentally forced myself to slacken my grip on the steering wheel again but it was too late. Rosalie was going to be furious at having to replace another one but the finger marks were too obvious this time.

"He said he was sorry and he wants to hang out with me before he heads home in a few days," Bella went on. "I think he's starting to get it but I can't be sure." She huffed to herself and played with the small moonstone ring she wore on her index finger. "He's just, I mean it's just so-," she broke off and thought for a moment before looking across at me. "I can't be angry at him just because I don't feel what he does, but he makes me so angry and sad all at the same time." She reached up to rub her eyes and I realised again how tired she was looking. "He hasn't done anything _wrong_, he loves me I just-," she spread her hands in a helpless gesture, "I just can't love him back." There was another pause as she rubbed her face again. "Does that make me a bad person? Throwing away someone's perfectly good love like that?"

"Do you want his love?" I asked and held an unnecessary breath as I waited for her answer.

"Yes and no," she admitted at last. "I want his friendship and love is a part of that but I don't want it all, just like he can't have all of me."

"Why is that, do you think?" I couldn't stop myself from asking the question, wondering what level of masochism was propelling me into this conversation in light of what I was about to do.

"Because you got there first," Bella said simply. "I'm yours," she reached out to take my hand and I submitted, feeling more like a monster than ever.

* * * * *

We had made good time and I had carried her up the mountain towards the clearing where I knew we wouldn't be interrupted. I stopped and let Bella slide from my back with a breathless giggle before I turned and looked at her. The sun was high overhead and I watched her expression slacken as she looked at my skin glinting in the sunlight.

"So beautiful," Bella commented as she bent down to pick a wildflower. She smiled at me as she twirled the bloom in her fingers as she walked across the clearing, stopping and picking flowers at random until she had a small posy. "Seeing all this here makes death seem to far away."

I stood watching her, unable to move, unable to believe what I had to do.

"Edward?" she turned and saw me watching her and held out a hand. "What's wrong?"

I couldn't prolong the moment any longer.

"We're leaving," I heard myself say the words and marvelled that I could sound so calm.

"What?" Bella's face went blank with incomprehension, "We just got here."

"I don't mean here," I gestured at the meadow, "I mean my family is leaving town. It's time to move on."

"Okay," Bella nodded slowly as she accepted my words at face value. "Let me pack a few things and I'll come with you."

"No," I shook my head at her and watched as she looked at me with bewilderment.

"No?" Bella frowned at this and took a half step towards me, stopping when I took a step back in response. "Edward, what's going on?"

"You're not coming," I said, "you're a liability."

Bella cocked her head as she watched me, her lips moved but she made no sound and her grip on her makeshift posy slackened until the flowers fell heedlessly at her feet.

"You don't … want me," she said at last.

"My family needs to move quickly and the sooner we're away from any temptation the better," I went on. Bella flinched at this as if my words were bullets. Her heart skipped a beat and began to falter as shock coursed through her body.

"When-," Bella said wonderingly.

"Now," I said with finality.

Bella shook her head as she tried to take it in.

"But I thought-," Bella began and stopped. She gave me another considering gaze and then set her lips in a firm line, the 'I want' crease appearing between her eyes. "Edward, I love you, whatever is going on we're in this together."

"My family and I are in this together. Carlisle's supposed to be ten years older than he looks; people are going to start noticing."" I emphasised, wondering how it was that I could sound so calm when my chest felt as if it was about to shatter into a million pieces. "You're not one of us. You don't belong in my world."

"That can be remedied," Bella retaliated as she took another step towards me.

I could not retreat any more and so I stepped to the right to stroll across the clearing with my hands clasped nonchalantly behind my back.

"Perhaps," I conceded with my back to her so that she could not see me close my eyes against the pain, "but for now my family is at risk and so we have to leave. We can't have the liability of a newborn to contend with as well."

"Edward," Bella's voice was rising, "what are you saying?"

"It's quite simple," I turned to face her now, drinking in the sight of her face as she stared at me with angry confusion. "I'm telling you that this is the last time you'll ever see me or my family."

"No," Bella began shaking as she began to walk towards me, "I won't hear it. This is bullshit, Edward and you know it."

I stood still and allowed her to reach me as she wrapped her arms around me and tried to hold me as tightly as she could. Her scent coiled around me and I could smell her desperation as she clutched at the back of my shirt. Moving with titanic slowness I put my arms around her and pressed a soft kiss against her sun-warmed hair. "Don't worry, you're human. Time heals all wounds for your kind, particularly if you're not reminded."

"I can't forget you," Bella choked against my shirtfront, "I won't. It's not possible, you're a part of me now." Bella pushed back to look at me angrily. "You think I'd let you into my heart like that, into my bed and then just forget when you're not around? Sorry Edward but this human doesn't work that way."

"Try to understand," I said in a hoarse whisper, "that every moment with you, every _second_ is about restraint. You're so fragile and it's exhausting trying to be something that I'm not."

"Then take me, make me yours," Bella grabbed at my arms with a firm grip that belied her slight frame, "I just want to be with you."

"Bella," I said sharply as I shook her off as carefully as I could, "you're not good for me." Self-disgust welled up in my chest but I tried to ignore its pressure. "I've let this go on for to long. I'm sorry."

"Edward," Bella's voice was mournful now, "it doesn't have to be like this, please-," she looked up at me as I reached up behind me to loosen her grip and push her away from me, "don't leave me, please, not when you've shown me so much."

"And that's why I have to leave," I went on inexorable in my logic now, "you know far too much for a human." I reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, "you know that which is preventing you from enjoying your human life and I won't allow it. I can't allow it. If I leave now I promise it will be like I never existed. Please," I cupped her face in my hands to stop her protests, "live. Be happy. Be safe." I leaned forward to kiss her forehead and Bella's eyes fluttered closed at my touch. "Goodbye, Bella."

By the time she opened her eyes again I was gone.

Bella stood alone in the clearing surrounded by sunshine and wildflowers that were at odds with the tears that ran down her face.

"Edward?" she called as she took an uncertain step in the direction she guessed I might have taken. "Edward!" she called out as she looked wildly around the meadow, turning in slow circles as she peered at the surrounding forest. Concealed high in the trees I watched her as she sank to her knees and began to sob feeling my dead heart crack open in silent sympathy with hers.

The sun tracked across the sky and still Bella hadn't moved. She had sat crying quietly for a long time before curling onto her side and falling into a light doze. I don't know what she hoped to achieve; perhaps she thought that I would change my mind and come back to her. It was everything I longed to do and more but I knew that James would be watching her for days to come and so I had to follow through on my words.

The sun was beginning to sink in the sky when Bella at last roused herself and began to stumble away towards the tree line. I frowned as I watched her go. She had set off in the wrong direction, one that would lead her away from where she had parked her truck. If she continued on she could end up lost. I shifted uncomfortably on my branch and felt myself stiffen with impotent rage at the situation James had forced us in to. Bella had disappeared into the undergrowth now and I could hear her tripping and stumbling as she pushed her way heedlessly past branches, apparently not caring where she was going.

I ground my teeth in frustration but I could not go back on my word now. This situation was of my own making in an effort to keep Bella safe but now I was wondering if even without vampires in the picture such a thing was even possible. Hours later I was going out of my mind with worry as Bella got herself comprehensively lost in the forest before curling up at the base of a tree shivering with cold as she folded in on herself in a futile attempt to stay warm. It was pitch black now and I cursed my night vision as I gazed at the pathetic form curled up on the ground. Another tree branched snapped off in my hands and I tossed aside carelessly, not even realising that I had thrown it with enough force to knock down a nearby sapling. Surely someone had to have noticed Bella was missing by now. Angela must have raised the alarm, and yet all I could do was sit and wait. I could not – would not – go to her, but I had to at least make sure that she ended up safe.

Another eternity had passed before I heard a snuffling in the words to the east of where Bella lay. I froze in place and stared at the place where I had heard the sound which came again moments later. Whatever it was it had a heavy, wet breath as it padded across the forest floor; some sort of animal? I couldn't tell, but paused in surprise when whatever it was began a methodical grid search pattern in an easy trot that spoke of an impressive stamina. I followed its progress with a mixture of panic and curiosity as it drew nearer to where Bella lay in a fitful doze, biting back a whispered curse of shock as the animal drew close enough to take a huge lungful of her scent and then rise to an impossible height. My eyes were wide with surprise as I watched the beast ripple and shudder before assuming human form, dropping to its knees with a soft groan of effort before half walking, half crawling towards Bella. He paused a few feet away to scrabble at some fabric that had been tied around one of his thighs, pulling on an old pair of denim cut-offs.

"Bella," the voice croaked before coughing and starting again in a stronger voice. "Hey, Bells, c'mon now, wake up."

"Jake?" Bella's voice was drowsy with shock and confusion as she blinked up at him. At his nod her chest began to jerk up and down before she burst into wracking sobs.

I made myself sit still as I watched him enfold Bella – _my Bella_ – in his arms but could not stop the angry rumble in my chest as he tucked her smaller body against his naked chest as he cradled her in his arms.

"Come on, let's get you home," he muttered as he stood up, Bella's slight weight apparently no effort at all, and began to make his way out of the forest. From time to time he paused with a quiet sniff, leaning forward a few times as he investigated a tree that I had perhaps brushed against as I had carried Bella to the meadow.

High up on my tree branch I sat waiting for a long time until I could hear no more of their progress before climbing down and turning with a wretched sigh towards home.

* * * * *

I emerged from the tree line near the house to see Alice waiting for me at the front door. She was all but quivering with anger and although Jasper stood beside her he was making no effort to smooth out her mood.

_Sorry, Edward, you brought this on yourself_ he said in a mental tone that held no sympathy.

"You don't have to say it," I began to Alice as I walked towards her.

"Who said I was going to say anything?" Alice replied. _I'm going to show you_.

Her words were a shout inside my head a fraction of a second before she flooded my mind with visions. I couldn't stop my involuntary grunt as Alice's barrage hit me, forcing me to my knees in front of her.

In the hours that followed no one said a word. They didn't have to; their thoughts were screaming at me.

**A/N: The tension is building up now. Questions? Comments? I'd love to know what you think but if you're not one for reviewing then that's fine too. I'm just happy that there are people out there reading this in the first place!**


	18. Chapter 18

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight_

**Songlines Ch18**

Carlisle was waiting for me inside, his face stiff with disapproval for all that he tried to mask it with fatherly concern.

"Edward," he inclined his head towards the stairs, "I need to speak with you."

"I don't doubt it," I said wearily.

_What the hell were you thinking?_ Alice's thoughts shrieked at me. _Bella could've gotten hurt; I can't see her any more now that she's with that boy. You've ruined everything!_

"Not now, Alice," I waved her off as she followed me towards the stairs.

"Right," she said in a bitter tone, "I should've realised this is all about _you_."

"It's not," I hissed as I spun on my heel to glare at her. "This is about all of us."

"Alice, please," Carlisle held out a placatory hand, "Edward and I will have a discussion about this first."

"Fine," Alice subsided against Jasper who pulled her close to kiss and whisper into her ear as he silently shook his head at me. Despite the gravity of the situation I marvelled that my family had taken up arms against me in this situation; Bella had won them over in an astonishingly short period of time, "but I'll be watching," she warned as I followed Carlisle up the stairs.

Carlisle opened the door to his study and stood aside for me to enter before entering and closing the door soundlessly behind him. I slumped into one of the leather armchairs and watched as he paced behind his desk and sat down with deliberate slowness. We sat and regarded each other in silence for a long moment. Out of courtesy I endeavoured not to listen to Carlisle's thoughts although I caught the occasional muttered snippet of poetry and medical recitations.

"You've placed us in a difficult situation," Carlisle ventured at last as he clasped his hands across his chest and gave me a sad smile.

"I did what I had to do," I replied after a careful pause, wincing as I heard a snort of disgust from Alice. The fact that Carlisle and I were sitting behind closed doors in his study was only geography; the others could hear us perfectly well from where they sat downstairs.

"Edward," he leaned across the desk to emphasis his words, "I'm not sure that you do. It's not just a matter of us leaving; it's what we leave behind that's just as important."

"You think I don't know that?" I glared at him feeling my anger surge as the pain in my chest clenched at burned as the memory of Bella's quiet sobbing turned itself over and over in my mind's eye.

"For you there's Bella," Carlisle nodded as he conceded the point. "I have patients at the hospital that I care about and want to heal, Rosalie and Emmett have been enjoying a rare chance to live as a young married couple without going through the charade of being students, Alice and Jasper are the happiest they've been in years-," his voice trailed off with a regretful smile as we both heard Alice huff downstairs.

"And Esme?" I raised an eyebrow.

"You know what Esme wants," Carlisle countered, "the same thing she has always wanted; a happy and loving family." _And for a while there, Edward, we had it._

My head dipped lower in shame now as his mental voice washed over me. He was right. When Bella was in the house there had been laughter and love, and I had pushed her away.

"So I suppose that brings me to the question that everyone is asking," Carlisle continued in a gentle tone, "why did you do it, Edward?"

"I had to," I addressed my feet as I spoke, I couldn't bear to look into his warm eyes knowing that I was being judged and found wanting and yet loved regardless.

"Surely there had to be something we could have-," Carlisle began and stopped when I looked up at him with anguish.

"I had to break her," I said, "it was the only way. James is going to be watching her and she has to convince him that we've gone, and then-," I broke off as I heard the sound of Alice pounding up the stairs towards us.

The door burst open and I had time to see Carlisle wince as the door swung off its hinges. Alice dashed towards me and I made no attempt to ward her off as she began to pound her fists against my chest.

"I can't believe you," she hissed at me, "do you seriously think that you've done the right thing?"

"I have to believe it was the best thing to do," I whispered as I stood accepting her blows. Carlisle had stood up at his desk but made no further move. Alice was like a hurricane as she pushed and slapped me as her rage directed.

"The _best_ thing?" Alice's voice nearly rose to a shriek and I saw Jasper standing in the doorway making no attempt to soothe her emotions. My head snapped sideways from the force of one of her blows and I welcomed the pain knowing that I deserved everything my sister chose to mete out. "You've thrown her to the wolves," Alice stopped hitting me and stepped back, her body sagging with grief. "And now I can't see her," she whispered in a broken voice. "How am I going to keep her safe when she's gone to me now, Edward? What are we going to do?"

In a moment of devastating clarity I saw what I had done.

Jasper stepped forward to take Alice by the hand as if to lead her from the room but she stood her ground as she stared at me.

"Here," she offered at last, "it's all I've got."

Before I could wonder what she meant the visions flooded my head. They were the same as before but this time Alice pictured each of them slowly making sure to linger over the details. I closed my eyes but it was no use.

I had achieved my goal. Bella looked utterly broken sitting beside Angela at campus; people around her were laughing and she sat staring inward looking pale and drawn. Other visions were of Bella sitting in the meadow with her knees drawn up to her chest as tears tracked down her cheeks; standing listlessly in the bookstore before being roused to bland conversation by customers; Bella trying to eat at Angela's quiet urging. Bella walking at night by herself, shadows flickering behind her as someone followed.

Alice had been able to watch Bella as she had stumbled through the forest but the moment Jacob had arrived to carry her to safety she had vanished. No matter how hard Alice tried, beyond that point Bella was invisible to her. Jasper put his arms around her and kissed her behind her ear, the way he knew she liked in a bed to calm her down.

"Are you beginning to see the flaw in your plan now?" Alice muttered in my direction as she accepted her mate's caresses.

I was.

"So what now?" Carlisle appeared beside me and I gave him a harried look.

"I don't know," I ran a hand through my hair. "I thought I was doing the right thing," I went on to Carlisle feeling wretched.

_So young …_

Carlisle hastily buried his train of thought behind a clamour of patient histories and replays of hospital conversations when I shot him a sidelong glance.

"Edward," it was Esme now, "is there anything we can do?" She stepped to Carlisle's side and he automatically reached out to pull her close.

_I don't want to go … _

I huffed out a long breath at this. By acting selfishly I had apparently ruined the happiness of my entire family.

_Enough. _It was Jasper. _Enough wallowing. What are we doing to do?_

They were all looking at me, which should have been no surprise. I was after all, the architect of the disastrous situation we now faced.

"I've been a fool," I admitted.

"Something we can all agree on, at least," Alice muttered.

Esme shot a warning look at Alice who had the grace to subside. Now it was Esme's turn to calm a member of the family, and she wrapped her arms around my shoulders in a purely motherly gesture, tucking herself against me as she tried to project as many comforting thoughts as she could. Time and again her thoughts circled back to Bella, as did mine.

"You called, we came. Whassup?" Emmett called from the doorway as he and Rosalie appeared.

"We've got a problem," Carlisle began.

"We?" Alice wasn't letting this go anytime soon.

Emmett gave me an inquiring look and so it fell to me to outline the situation with James and Victoria. Emmett listened, giving a low whistle when I told him about Lauren, his honest face creasing in anger at the ultimatum from James.

"What about Bella?" Emmett asked as soon as I had finished speaking.

"You told him we'd leave?" Rosalie was beginning to look just as angry as the rest of the family had been. _How many chances to we get to be this age? So unfair …_

"Enough." This time it was Carlisle who spoke. He wore a slight frown as it looked at each of us in turn. "Edward has realised what he's done and now it's up to _all_ of us to work together."

The room was silent as everyone processed his words and I winced as everyone's thoughts increased in volume as they worked though countless scenarios and possibilities.

"I don't understand," Rosalie ventured at last. "What is it that James wants?"

"Simple, he wants us gone," I shrugged. "Perhaps something about us living here as a family disagreed with him."

"You think he might be jealous?" Rosalie openly scoffed at this. "Of college students? I very much doubt that."

"No," I replied slowly, "it's more than that. More insidious for someone like him."

That got everyone's attention.

"He's bored," I said with a shrug. "We presented the prospect of a challenge, or at least a diversion."

"What sort of challenge?" Rosalie cocked her head as she narrowed her eyes. She already knew the answer but she wanted to hear me say it.

"Bella," I sighed. "He was fascinated with her."

"Fascinated how," Emmett draped an arm around Rosalie's shoulders as he leaned forward. "Curious about what she might taste like?"

"More the fact that a human could consort with vampires without coming to grief," I replied. "He's never encountered it before."

"So he told you he'll play nice if you leave down, and you _believed _him? This is how you deal with the situation?" Rosalie was prodding at me now.

I nodded, grimacing as Emmett groaned in disbelief.

"I didn't know what else to do," I muttered.

"You couldn't talk to us first before you pulled this kind of stunt?"

"There wasn't time."

"You had all day to come up with a plan," Alice objected.

"But when the ultimatum was made James was standing outside Bella's apartment," I argued. "What was there for me to do? Go and leave her vulnerable? He was in her _room_, that's how he got to Lauren. When he realised he'd killed the wrong woman he went back to do some more investigating."

"Damn," Emmett swore and then ducked his head at Esme's disparaging look.

"What would stop him from killing Bella once we've left?" Rosalie asked. I hissed at this and she held up her hands in supplication. "I'm just asking."

"His thoughts indicated that he would follow through on our agreement."

"People can change their minds," Rosalie replied as she raised an eyebrow at me.

I looked at Alice.

"Don't look at me," she widened her eyes in mock appeal, "Now that she's with the dog I can't see a thing."

I shook my head. This was just going from bad to worse.

"So," Carlisle began in a heavy voice, "Edward you seem to have more insights into this James than any of us, what do you suppose he would do if he were to follow the un-gentlemanly course of action?"

"He would expect retribution," I said after a considered pause.

"And he'd _get_ it," Emmett replied.

"Which would make ideal sport for him for however long it took," Jasper mused.

The tension in the room was increasing as everyone considered the idea of Bella coming to harm. I was the worst offender. It seemed that in doing what I had hoped was the right thing to do I had placed her in more danger than ever before.

"What about Bella?" Esme hadn't let go of me and now she looked up at me, her golden eyes staring at mine. "Did you tell her any of this?"

"No," I admitted.

"Oh, Edward," she openly mourned now. "She's going to get the wrong idea."

"That was the plan."

"Some plan," Jasper sighed. "Still, the situation can be salvaged."

"How?" I gaped at Jasper now as he released Alice to begin slowly pacing the room as he considered options.

"I think we've established that leaving Bella alone has been the wrong course of action here," he said after giving me a droll look, "so the only thing for us to do now is to get her back."

"Do you think that's wise?" Rosalie was looking from Jasper to myself.

"Hell yeah, let's do this," Emmett growled, then: "What? You know I'd do the same for you," as Rosalie looked up at him.

"I know, Baby," she assured him and then looked at me with a sigh. "I guess that means she's here to stay."

"If she'll have me," I replied.

"Mmm, well if I'm any judge you'll have a lot of explaining to do," Rosalie gave me an arch look.

"As long as it takes," I nodded. I was ready to wrap Bella up and never let her go. There would never been enough time for me to apologise to her for what I had done.

"Do we even know where she is?" Esme released me at last, feeling my body vibrate with eagerness.

Her question was enough to dash my optimism for the moment.

"She's with the Quileute Tribe," I admitted.

"Which presents a problem," Carlisle said.

"To us perhaps, but not to James if he can find her," I replied.

"True," Carlisle nodded, "but we're the only ones that they agreed to strike a treaty with."

"You really think they'll let him get that far into their territory?" Jasper replied.

"Hard to say," I said. "The boy has my scent; he was picked it up when he was looking for Bella so they know we're here. If they're smart they'll be patrolling."

"If he has your scent he'll know you're involved with Bella," Jasper offered. "Your scent would be all over her. Do you really think they'll let her go?"

"It depends," I frowned, "on whether they want to protect her or hold her against her will."

"Please," Rosalie laughed, "do you seriously think anyone can make Bella do something she doesn't want to do?"

"True," I gave a grudging smile.

"Still," Rosalie continued, "she'd need to know we were there, and when I say _we_ I mean you," she nodded in my direction. "If she knows what the boy is, then they'll realise she knows what we are." I watched as Rosalie bit her lip in thought, and seeing the gesture reminded me of Bella and I felt a melancholy ache in my chest.

_Focus_.

I looked up at met Jasper's watchful gaze for a moment before he gave a nod of satisfaction.

"So, what are we going to do?" Emmett asked.

Alice had been standing quietly in Jasper's arms but at Emmett's question she had looked up to stare straight at me. I tried to ignore her expression as I ran through some ideas, but I could see her expression begin to brighten with hope.

"I have to get her back," I said at last.

"Good luck with that," Rosalie offered, "she's going to be _pissed_."

"I have to at least try."

"What if she won't even talk to you?" Esme asked.

"Then I'll wait until she will."

"For how long?" Esme looked up at me as Carlisle reached for her again.

"As long as it takes," I said as I stared at her before turning to gaze at each of my family in turn. They were all standing in their mated pairs offering each other silent support. I ached for that kind of partnership, and was now all too aware that I although I would love Bella for the rest of my existence there was the genuine possibility that she would not.

"Do you think she knows about Jacob?" Esme spoke up. _We shouldn't call him the boy, if he's Bella's age then he's hardly a boy in the human sense. _

"I'm not sure he's human," I said to Esme and smiled at her surprise. "I saw him shift from wolf to human." I looked over her shoulder to Carlisle. "We know what tribe he's in, so we have to assume there are others like him."

"Bella has some powerful protection," Jasper mused, "within the treaty and without." He gave a mirthless grin. "Must be something that goes hand in hand with being a danger magnet."

Carlisle tried to muffle a laugh. "Nature likes to find a balance," he offered.

"So what are we doing to do?" Emmett asked. "We're staying, right?" he gave me a hopeful look, "so what are we going to do about the meat eater?"

"He should still think that we're leaving," Jasper was thoughtful, "at least until we can get Bella somewhere safe."

"Who's to say she's not safe where she is?" Rosalie asked and then, "just saying," she muttered as I gave her an angry look.

"She has a point, Edward," Carlisle remonstrated. "James will be watching us to see what we do, but he won't be expecting them."

"There might be more of them to keep an eye on her too," Emmett offered.

"I want her here," I growled.

"Oh for fu- goodness sake," Alice cried throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation. Esme gave a quick _tsk_ but had to smile at Alice's quick recovery in her choice of phrase. "You went to extreme lengths to make sure she'd feel comprehensively rejected and now you've realised you've made a massive mistake and you want to sweep her into your arms," Alice began pacing the room ticking items off on her fingers and glaring at me at every opportunity as she spoke. "There's a nomad vampire and his mate in the area that are going to be watching every move we make, you know they want to get to Bella but you want to remove her from perhaps the best protection she may have at the moment." She stopped and turned to face me. "And just to really ice the cake, this has all been within twenty-four hours and you've realised you've perhaps made one of the biggest mistakes in your existence."

"Yes," I nodded.

"Because it's only now that you've discarded her that you've realised that maybe, _maybe_," Alice paused in front of me to tap my chest with one finger. I barely felt it of course, but the pressure she was using would have knocked a human to the floor. "Maybe she's the best thing that's ever happened to you."

"Yes," this time my voice was little more than a whisper.

"And you don't want to live without her," Alice whispered back. "None of us want to be without her, even Rosalie."

I looked at Rosalie with surprise at this revelation. Rosalie met my gaze and shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

"What? She has a backbone, and she's managed to get you to loosen up. Well," Rosalie went on to qualify, "at least you had until you put your head so far up your as-," she broke off as Esme made a sharp noise in her throat. "Sorry _Mom_," she grinned.

"Honestly," Esme sighed. "Is it really that much to ask?"

"Guess I'm rubbing off on you, Babe," Emmett gently nipped at her ear-lobe.

"That's what you're calling it?" Rosalie replied with a soft smile.

"When we're in company," Emmett wrapped his arms around her waist and held her to his chest.

I looked at Alice. "Have you finished making your point?"

"I have," she blinked.

"So what do you want me to do?"

"Go get your girl," she urged.

"What about James?" I asked.

"We'll do what we can," Carlisle offered. "You see what you can do about getting Bella."

I was heading towards the door before Carlisle had even finished speaking.

* * * * *

I stood on the invisible boundary line of the Quileute reservation pacing back and forth. There was nothing to stop me; no mystical force fields, no alarms, no sirens, nothing except a simple verbal agreement made decades before. Nothing could stop me, except Carlisle's word. The man was my father, my friend and my moral compass. I'd come this far; I couldn't let him down now.

Stepping to my right I paused to sniff at a tree, then took a few more steps to sniff another, wrinkling my nose at the stench. It seemed they took great care to clearly indicate their demarcation line. Judging by the scent saturation in the area they had been here recently, making it every possibility that they would return again soon.

I stood and waited.

As expected it didn't take long. The moon was high setting the night sky blazing with colour when I heard the first approach. There were three of them; enormous wolves pacing towards me growls building in the back of their throats. I kept silent, making no move as they came as close as they dared. The largest of the three paced back and forth along the perimeter as if trying to look at me from every angle without crossing the boundary. The other two sat on their haunches and watched the proceedings as the lead wolf continued to pace. At last the three of them turned and cautiously trotted away, the smaller of the three pausing to look back at me before they vanished from sight.

I stood and waited.

Twice more the same patrol came and discovered me in exactly the same place. It wasn't until the fourth night that they appeared in human form, jogging towards me in a loose formation, steam from their overheated bodies curling in smoky eddies off their bare chests. We stood and regarded each other for a long moment. It was the Alpha who spoke first.

"You're not a stranger to us," he ventured at last.

"But I'm not a friend," I inclined my head in acknowledgement.

"Your kind have passed through this way before," the Alpha went on. It wasn't a question.

"We have," I nodded.

"And others … not like your kind."

I raised an eyebrow at this.

"They did not honour the treaty and so they were … dealt with." This information was offered in tones of satisfaction.

"I see," I nodded again.

"What is it your family wants?"

"What we have always wanted," I replied, "to live quietly amongst humans. We don't seek to intrude, nor do we intend to hunt on anything other than animals."

"Things change," he snapped.

"They do, but not within my family," I rebutted. "The deaths have not been from the Cullens."

One of the men in the background gave a grunt of derision but stood quiet when the Alpha shot him a quelling look.

"What is it that you want?"

This was it.

"You have something that is precious to me," I began cautiously. "I want to make sure-,"

"How precious?" said the third.

I considered this question. The treaty had been made in the spirit of full disclosure and I saw no reason to transgress from Carlisle's original intentions.

"More precious than life itself," I answered.

"Spoken by a Cold One," sneered the second.

"Believe what you will," I said. "I just want to make sure that she's safe."

_How could the freak know Bella's here? She hasn't left the Res since Jake brought her here. She hasn't even left the cabin for days. How could he possibly have found out?_

I stayed motionless, not daring to show the extent of my relief that she was all right.

_This is Edward?_

The thought had come from the left and I glanced over at the third, who had been standing silent throughout the exchange. He looked to be the youngest of the three and he took an involuntary step back when he caught my regard. Our eyes met and I didn't waste a moment in scanning his mind as rapidly as I could. What I saw made me close my eyes in pain.

When Jacob had appeared with Bella cradled against his chest the cry had gone up from the women. She had appeared so small and pale in his arms that they thought she had been injured. A frantic pat down and babble of questions had revealed that physically she was all right but beyond that they were unable to determine the extent of her injuries. They found out soon enough. Bella still talked in her sleep and now, thanks to me, she cried in her sleep too. Everyone within hearing range of her screams knew my name after the first night.

"Please," I looked at the Alpha, "is Bella all right?"

"As well as she can be," he allowed after an uncomfortably long pause. I had already been able to glean all that I could from his mind as he considered his answer. Bella wasn't eating much, choosing to sleep as much as she could as if to retreat from her situation entirely. The adults were worried but Bella remained silent on the subject of what had happened, saying only that she was going to be fine. She looked pale.

"Can I see her?"

"Not on our territory," the Alpha shook his head, "and not if she doesn't want to see you."

"Will you tell her I'm here?"

The Alpha stood looking at me, the other two watched him for instructions. I could hear a whispered conversation between them but it was too indistinct for me to make out. Fascinating. I would have to tell Carlisle; no doubt he would be intrigued with this fresh insight.

The three men turned in unison and began to stride away. I could see their outlines become blurred as they began to tremble. The younger one fell to his knees with a pained grunt as the change swept through him. Even though I had seen the change before I was mesmerised as I saw it happen in front of me again. The young wolf struggled to his feet and looked back at me before loping into the night. The second followed but the Alpha who had remained in human form a moment longer.

"You've kept to the treaty?"

"Always," I nodded, "then, now and forever."

He nodded as he processed this and then reached his decision.

"I'll tell her. The rest is up to Bella." He turned and then paused to look back at me. "Assuming she even wants to see you, where will you be?"

"Here," I planted my feet and stood my ground. "As long as it takes."

I waited another two days before Bella appeared. If it hadn't been for her scent carrying towards me on the wind I would have had no idea. I was standing as close to the boundary line as possible and could not risk any violations by stepping closer. She stopped six feet away and my hands twitched, wanting to reach out to pull her to me.

"Bella," I whispered, "please … "

"You hurt me," she said in a quiet voice.

"I know," I replied, shamed, "I thought it would keep you safe, I thought-,"

"So you lied to me," she interrupted, "you let me think you were throwing me away."

There was nothing I could say against her quiet words. I would have felt better in my need for punishment if she had screamed and raged at me but instead her whispered words cut me to the quick.

"It will never happen again," I vowed.

"Yes it will," Bella looked at me with solemn eyes.

"No-," I began but stopped when she shook her head.

"As long as there's this difference between us, it will," she replied. "As long as you think you have to look out for me we'll never be equal."

"I love you, Edward. You know that, right?" Her voice was so calm, placid even. I wondered if she had rehearsed this conversation. I had no idea what sort of Bella would appear to me, or if she would even come to me at all. As always she confounded me with her reactions.

"I know," I nodded.

"But you've never told me, did you know that?" Bella looked at me now. "Every day it was implied, but you never said the words." She gave a dry laugh. "I don't even know if that's important now, but I assumed how you felt and it backfired so-," she shrugged.

I was appalled that she could doubt my feelings for her but realised with shock that it was true.

"Bella," my throat was tight and so I had to start again. She was still too far away. "I had to think I was doing the right thing, and I was wrong."

"Really," she watched me with impassive eyes, but I could hear her heart rate begin to increase.

"So very wrong," I repeated.

"You know what else is wrong?" Bella took a step closer, then another. I could reach out and touch her now but I kept my arms at my sides. The situation was in Bella's hands. "In spite of what you did, I think I might still love you."

I waited.

"Ridiculous I know," Bella shook her head, "but sometimes horses will run into a burning barn. Perhaps my self-preservation instinct is on the same level."

She took another step closer.

"Don't you think it's silly, Edward? Because you hurt more than anyone else has in a long time, and yet here we are, and all I want to do is be able to touch you again."

I sucked in a deep breath at this and instead of wincing at the burn in my throat that her scent induced I gloried in it.

"So do you think maybe we could do that? Will you just … hold me? Just for a while? I don't know what I want beyond that, but I need to feel you."

I nodded but when I didn't move any closer to her I had to indicate the boundary with a sweep of my arm.

"There's a treaty," I explained, my voice sounding as wretched as I felt, "I can't cross the Quileute boundary."

"So you're saying I have to come to you?" Bella hesitated now and I tried not to groan at the thought of her changing her mind.

Bella wavered for an instant before firming her lips and taking another two steps towards me. We stood close enough that she had to tilt her head to look up at me and I could see tears welling against her eyelashes.

"Please," she began, "do you think you could be holding me now?"

To Bella's human eyes I moved too swiftly for her to see, and yet from my perspective I moved with agonising slowness. I enfolded my arms around her cradling her as carefully as I could. I pressed endless kisses against her hair as she pressed herself against my silent chest and wept.

**A/N: Sorry it has been so long guys. Have you noticed a honking big hole in my FF account where Take the Cake used to be? I'm working on getting it published so it had to be taken down. If you're interested in hearing news of how that's progressing, come check out my blog. Hope on over to Blogger or Blogspot and do a search by name (Sandyk199) or 'Take the Cake'. All the recipes from the story are there and we're starting to have a find old time … **


	19. Chapter 19

_**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I own a ridiculous workload that I have created for myself. When will I learn?**_

**Songlines Ch19**

I don't know how long we stood there in each other's arms, and I didn't care. It wasn't until Bella shifted and looked up at me with a slight wince that I realised she must be getting tired. It had been late in the day when Bella had approached me and now it was getting late.

"You need to rest," I whispered as I kissed her hair again.

"I need answers," she frowned and fisted my shirt as if to hold on to me all night. She shifted her weight slightly and I felt her legs begin to buckle with fatigue. Pulling her closer to my chest I sank to my knees so that I could sit cradling Bella across my lap. She shifted and turned, lifting a hand to push at the open neck of my shirt so that she could rest her cheek against my bare skin. The weather was still cold and so the warmth of Bella's face against my skin felt like a hot coal. I dipped my head to nuzzle her hair and felt her sleepy hum of pleasure.

We had barely spoken all and certainly had said nothing more to resolve the pain that still lay between us. Other than our initial exchange Bella had fired no more accusations and I had yet to account for my actions. The fact that we were reunited was enough for now; the answers could come later.

Bella's heartbeat had skittered as she had walked towards me and then as soon as we touched it had settled into its familiar rhythm. Now as she shifted on my lap to put her arms around my neck I closed my eyes and counted the beats for no other reason other the fact that I could. One hundred and forty seven beats later I looked up as I heard someone approach. The wind had changed direction blowing the scent of whatever it was away from me, but the muffled train of thought told me what I needed to know; it was one of the shifters.

"Your friends are coming," I dipped my head so that my lips brushed her ears as I spoke, smiling as she nodded her head against my chest.

"Out hunting again," Bella yawned as she spoke and so didn't notice my surprise.

"Is that what they told you?"

"Mm-hmm," Bella blinked owlishly, "They go out every night."

I looked over her head as the others approached; for whatever reason they had chosen to conceal their nature from her. I couldn't say I was pleased but given the situation and the fact that they had sheltered her when she was at her most vulnerable I wasn't able to judge. They stopped a dozen feet away and stared at us in silence. Whatever they had expected it clearly wasn't the sigh of Bella and I entwined in each other's arms. Jake was with them and he was radiating displeasure which intensified as he looked at us.

"Can I come home with you?" Bella looked up at me.

"It isn't safe," I conceded with considerable reluctance as I watched her hopeful expression turn into a frown of disappointment.

"Why?" Bella pulled away so that she could look up at my face when I spoke.

"There are others in the area," I said as I reached up to comb my fingers through her hair. "Nomads, but they are watching my family."

"Oh," Bella's eyes widened as she processed this and then she gave me a hard look.

"What aren't you telling me?"

"They know about you," I replied.

"How much do they know?" she shifted uneasily against me now.

"Where you live," I began, "your connection with me …"

"So Lauren-," she began and bit her lip.

"Wasn't an accident," I shook my head.

"I don't understand-," she pushed herself away from me now and got to her feet with a soft groan. "Is that anything to do with why you left?"

Cold air rushed to cool my lap where she had been sitting and I immediately missed her warmth. I got to my feet to follow her, looking over at the pack that stood waiting. The Alpha and Jacob were watching closely in a mixture of curiosity and anger. The third was the young man I had seen a few nights before. Now that they were in human form they thoughts were clear to me now. Jacob's thoughts were darting from one possibility to the next, almost frantic with the need to think of a way for Bella to stay with them; with him. The Alpha was uneasy with the situation to be sure, but the matter of my family's truce had been drilled in to him from an early age. To them we were the hated Cold Ones, but the code honour the treaty seemed to hold true.

"It is," I began, stopping with Bella's brows knit together in frustration. Her eyes looked suspiciously shiny and I didn't want to be the cause of any more of her tears.

"And I suppose you thought you were doing it for the right reasons," Bella went on. Her back was stiff with tension now and the warm embrace that we had shared seemed far away now.

"It's a game to them," I ventured at last.

"Killing people is a _game_?"

"Bella, it's what they _do_," Jacob spoke, contriving to ignore me for all that I was only standing six feet away.

"Not Edward," Bella shot back, "not now," she continued when Jacob made to object.

"And that makes it okay?" Jacob openly mocked this.

"Be careful," I said in a soft voice, "we are not all without our secrets." I held his gaze and then glanced at Bella before looking back at him. That was enough to make the boy subside. "Have you ever made a mistake?" I asked him in a quiet voice. "Have you ever had to repent for your actions and start afresh?"

Jacob said nothing but his hands clenched into impotent fists as he glared at me. The shifters were producing such body heat that zephyrs of steam rose off their bodies and eddied around them. His heart gave an unsteady thump and then began to increase in speed. The stress of the situation was getting to him and I watched as he gave a sudden shiver and stepped forward a pace. The Alpha glared at him and I caught a sharp mental command that stopped Jacob in his tracks.

Bella stood watching me breathing in shallow, angry breaths.

"Edward," she began in a warning tone, "if you're trying to tell me that you-," she broke off and got herself back under control. "I can't tell you how angry I am right now."

I looked at her, bewildered. Surely she would understand that I had acted with the best of intentions.

Jacob's thoughts were pleased at the unexpected direction this conversation was now taking.

"So you're telling me I can't go home?" she was openly challenging me now.

I considered my words carefully now as Bella stood glaring at me in the moonlight.

"You can," I began cautiously, "but it's not safe."

"What about you?" she made as if to step forward and my hands twitched as if to reach out for her but we both remained where we were. "What about your family?"

"They're hunting," I answered after shooting Jacob a sidelong look.

"There seems to be a lot of that going on," Bella replied in a low voice. I watched as she looked over at Jacob and saw something else beyond the layers of friendship that existed between them. Frustration perhaps? Bella watched him a moment longer before returning her attention to me. I watched Jacob and got my answer. Bella had her suspicions that something wasn't right, and it seemed the boy had little finesse when it came to keeping secrets from her. He hadn't told her outright, but judging from his thoughts it seemed that she was getting close. I considered this for a fraction of second. Why hadn't he told her outright himself? It was clear he wanted to; where Bella was concerned he operated on full disclosure, to her discomfort and his apparent frustration.

"Hunting for …," Bella trailed off and gave me a speculative look.

"The others," I nodded.

"So why aren't you with them if it's that important?" Bella asked as she shoved her hands into her jeans pockets. The cold was getting to her now and I could see her starting to shiver.

"Because they're not where you are," I said simply.

This made her blink. "Oh," she said at last.

"They're tracking and report back," I offered, "I'll join them when I can."

"When will that be?"

I opened my mouth to answer and Bella held up a hand as she shook her head.

"You know what? I think this is a conversation that can wait," she said as she glared at Jacob who was following our conversation with unashamed interest, "because I have a lot of questions that need answers _in private_." The last two words were directed at Jacob who gave her a slow smile.

"Hey," he offered, "if you weren't staying with us then I wouldn't have to follow you on your late night walks to see this guy," he finally acknowledged my presence. "Do you even know what he _is_?" The distaste in his voice was evident.

"Of course I know," Bella snapped at him, "Edward was honest about his nature, unlike some others I could mention."

"Bells," Jacob looked hurt at this and he took a step towards her with his hands held out in supplication.

"Don't you 'Bells' me," she replied as she took a step away from Jacob that brought her a step closer to me. "I know there's something you're not telling me, so don't think you can tell me what the view's like from the moral high ground."

I had to conceal my smile when Jacob looked suitably chastened.

"As for you," Bella turned her attention to me, "I can't go home?"

"I'd rather you didn't," I admitted.

"What about your place? Do you have a bed yet?"

"No," I answered this with a great deal of reluctance knowing that Jacob would be filing away our conversation for future reference. "But that can be remedied."

"Do it," Bella nodded, "because as soon as that's done I'm coming with you."

"No!"

Bella and I both looked over at Jacob's outburst. He stood with his mouth working but said nothing further. His thoughts however, were a jumble of riotous shouting.

"Enough," Bella groaned as she pulled her hands out of her pockets to rub at her face. "I'm so tired of all this," she mumbled to herself, "it's too much." She let her arms drop to her sides and stood looking between the two of us before rousing herself and taking three decisive steps towards me and wrapping her arms around my waist. My arms came up automatically to hold her as my head dipped to press a soft kiss against her hair.

"You'll come back?" Her voice was muffled against my chest.

"Always and forever," I assured her.

"That sounds nice, but when exactly?" Bella asked as her breath puffed against my chest.

"I'll meet up with Emmett and Jasper, and Alice can keep watch," I offered.

"So, when?" Bella was pushing me for an answer now and I had no idea what to say. Without Alice's assurances I was operating blind. As if on cue my cell phone vibrated in my pocket.

"You use cell phones?" Jacob asked in a sceptical tone.

"Sure. Why, what do you use? Smoke signals?" I was unable to keep the sneer from my voice.

"Behave," Bella muttered against my chest but she still hadn't let me go.

I glanced at the screen of the cell phone over Bella's shoulder. It was Alice and I smiled at her swift response.

"Who was it?" Bella asked.

"Alice," I replied, "telling me that there will be a bed installed in my room tomorrow. She's looking forward to seeing you."

"It's entirely mutual," Bella commented.

"Bella," Jacob began again and Bella gave a sigh of regret before looking up at me, ignoring him for the time being.

"Tomorrow?" she asked.

"I'll be here," I assured her.

"Then I'll be waiting," Bella replied.

She released me and stepped away towards Jacob, nodding once to the Alpha who fell into step beside her. Jacob held out his hand but Bella walked past him and kept going without looking back. Jacob shot me a look of annoyance before wheeling and following Bella who had kept striding away. The confident gesture was somewhat undermined when she tripped on a tree root and stumbled forward with a muffled curse.

I stayed until she was out of sight before turning with a sigh and heading towards home. As was to be expected Alice was waiting for me when I reached the steps of the house.

"The bed will be getting delivered tomorrow afternoon," she began in a peremptory tone, "and Esme and I will take care of the bedding."

"Thank you," I nodded as I paused in front of her.

"I still haven't forgiven you," she went on, "and Bella hasn't either so don't think you're out of the woods yet."

"It never crossed my mind," I assured her.

_So you admit you're dumb but at least you're not stupid into the bargain_, Alice mentally snapped at me as she turned on her heel and walked inside. Suitably chastened, I followed.

"And so my penitent son returns," Esme greeted with a smile as she grasped my hands to pull her close for a hug. "How's Bella?"

"She's fine," I sighed as I waited for Esme to let me go. It seemed that my stocks had risen overnight. Everyone's attitudes seemed to have moved from bewildered resentment to relief that I had accepted the consequences of my actions; or were about to. Bella was going to make me work very hard to get back into her good graces but I would do anything she demanded of me. Her forgiveness and love were what I wanted beyond anything else.

"So what have we found out?" I said as I took a seat on the sofa facing Jasper.

"They stayed in the area for a few days," Jasper began, "but I caught the male's scent heading east. He may have taken you at your word."

"Doubtful," Carlisle interjected with a frown. "With the rest of us in the area and Bella out of sight he may have assumed that the two of you are on the run."

"Perhaps," Jasper nodded at this and then sniffed and pulled a face. "Particularly if what I can smell on you is anything close to how Bella-,"

"She's with them, yes," I sighed.

"But not for much longer," Alice assured me as she moved past me to sit beside Jasper. "She's safe with them purely on the basis of scent if nothing else," she said as she wrinkled her nose.

_I'll make sure she has some clothes here to change into_, Alice offered and I gave her a nod to indicate that I understood.

The next day found me waiting beside the road as close to the boundary line as possible and it was only sheer effort of will that kept me from pacing back and forth as I waited.

_Just look at the bloodsucker ..._ the mental voice was rich with contempt and my head snapped up as I saw Jacob approaching on foot, Bella beside him. They stopped a few feet away so that Bella could retrieve her bag from Jacob and then take the last few steps towards me. Clasping her warm hand in mine I gently ran my thumb over her pulse and felt myself relax for the first time in days. I was so caught up in the watching the way her hair fluttered in the light breeze that I almost missed what Bella was saying.

"Thanks, Jacob," she said to the boy who stood unhappily as he watched me draw her to my side with only a slight tug.

"I don't like this, Bells," he said.

_Look at him standing there, if Bella wasn't here I could take him ..._

"Anytime," I said in a quiet voice and watched his eyes widen. That would give him something to report back to the others on.

_He heard me, can he hear everyone? Sam has to know that-_

He stopped as I gave an almost imperceptible nod.

"So now you know," I replied as I retrieved Bella's bag and slung it over my shoulder and resolutely turned my back on him, effectively dismissing him. It was a gesture of pettiness on my part, but I had to admit I felt a rush of satisfaction at the surge of anger from his thoughts.

"Wait," Bella tugged at my hand and I stopped to look at her. "Jake," she began as she held out her hands in a mute plea for understanding, "I'm sorry that things are … different."

"They don't have to be," he mumbled.

"Will I see you soon?" she asked. The slight backward step she took at his unhappy response showed me how much his words had stung.

"Ask _him_," Jacob said as he jerked his chin at me.

Bella raised an eyebrow at this.

"I think Bella can make up her own mind," I replied in as mild a tone as I could manage. My first impulse was to spirit Bella far away and never have her anywhere near the dog again, but I was learning my lessons the hard way. Bella could not be bidden against her will, and woe-betide anyone who tried.

_He's done something to her. Mind control? If he can read thoughts what else can he do? Something's wrong, she's not behaving like my Bella…_

I gave a very low growl at this. She wasn't his Bella; she was mine.

"Jake," Bella shook her head at him and then to my astonishment stepped forward to wrap her arms around him. "Let it go."

Jacob stood motionless before lifting his arms slowly to wrap them around her slight body and hold her tight to his chest.

"I can't, Bella," he whispered against her ear. "I won't. It's too dangerous."

"I've been told that before," Bella replied, and I knew she was talking to us both this time.

"Do you really think you can keep her safe?" Jake challenged me over Bella's shoulder.

"Can you?" I replied. I had to keep my voice and body calm although it was all I could do not to tear her out of his arms. His scent was coating her in a way that I found repulsive and the slight smirk on his face told me that he knew exactly what he was doing. At my words however the smirk on his face faltered and I ruthlessly dipped into his thoughts. A woman's scarred face was at the forefront of his thoughts now as the Alpha staggered back gasping in anguish as the blood dripped off his now-human fingers. "My guess is that would be a _no_," I replied quietly.

"I may not be safe anywhere," Bella snapped, "but surely wherever I go it's my decision." She shifted in Jake's arms but it took a while before Jake accepted her silent message and released her.

"I can't believe you're choosing him over what we have," Jacob replied.

"What we have is only what you want it to be. Don't ask me to choose Jacob, because it'll be him."

"Even after what he did?" Jacob's face was blank with disbelief before he smiled and looked at me. The visions came without any warning.

I winced and closed my eyes but there was no escaping them; the sight of Bella curled in on herself as Jacob watched from the doorway, her quiet passivity and then her raging screams as she slept.

"We'll see," Bella conceded.

"Then I'll be waiting," Jacob said as he shot me an angry look.

_You don't deserve her. I'll fight for her until my heart stops beating._

Bold words to be sure, but I would fight for her for every day of forever. We stared at each other until Bella reached my side and I gladly broke my gaze with him to smile at Bella as she took my hand.

"Take me home," she said simply.

"Gladly," I replied. Relieving her of her bag I put my arm around her shoulders and steered her towards the car. Bella cast Jacob an apologetic look but after that she didn't look back. Jacob stood trembling as we drove off, and my last glimpse of him in the side mirror was of him falling to his knees as the change overtook his body.

The drive was silent for a long moment and I glanced over at Bella repeatedly as she chewed at her lower lip and watched me just as carefully.

"Will the others be there?" she said at last.

I nodded at this.

"That's going to be tricky then," she began, "because you and I need to have a talk."

"I'll see what I can do," I began and sighed when my phone buzzed. Apparently Alice was keeping a close eye on the situation until Bella was safely home.

_Everyone out. House is yours. Grovel if you have to._

"What did she say?" Bella looked at me curiously as I flicked a glance at the phone before stowing it back in my pocket.

"That we have the house to ourselves for a while," I replied.

"Good to know," Bella murmured.

True to Alice's word we arrived home to an empty house, although the fire in the living room had been left burning which added a comforting layer of warmth to the air.

"Would you like to sit here by the-," I began but stopped as Bella waved me off.

"Your room," she nodded towards the stairs and held out her hand.

It seemed that it was time for me to take my punishment, but I followed docilely as she led me up the stairs and to my room. Bella opened the door and stopped short with a quiet 'huh' of surprise.

Alice had done herself proud. The bed was an impressive display of comfort with enough pillows to satisfy even the fussiest sleeper. My chaise lounge had been relegated to the far corner of the room, making the bed the central focus of the room without overpowering it. I paused as I took in the sight as well. The notion of a bed in my room was a concept I hadn't considered until Bella.

Dropping her bag beside the door Bella walked towards the bed and sat on it as she removed her shoes before crawling across the comforter to sit cross legged with her back against the pillows. I hesitated in the doorway of the room wondering how she wanted to proceed, but moved forward with a sense of relief when she held out her hand for me to join her. Alice had flicked on a lamp by the window and so the room was bathed in a glow of soft light that threw our shadows on to the wall.

We sat knee to knee gazing at each other in silence for a long moment. Bella had seemed calm and preoccupied in the car on the way home, but how her inner thoughts began to betray themselves as I waited for her to speak. We were both aware that there was a lot of ground to cover, and for now the outcome of that conversation was uncertain. She was fidgeting; biting her lower lip and pulling at a loose thread on a worn patch on the knee of her jeans, flicking and playing with the same lock of hair over and over.

"Why did you do it?" she said at length.

"It seemed like the right thing to do," I replied. I kept my hands on my knees although my palms twitched to reach out and stroke her until she could relax and be still.

"Is that why you did it? Because it was the right thing to do, or because you _wanted_ to do it?" Bella persisted.

"Because I had to," I replied. My mouth felt dry. This felt like the moment of truth and whatever I said now would determine if Bella would stay with me for now or never. "The other ... James. You were in your apartment and he was waiting outside. He told me that if we left they would move on."

"They?" Bella cocked her head at this.

"James and his ... mate," I said. Bella cocked her head and regarded me with narrowed eyes.

"I seem to recall you tripping over that word not long ago," Bella said in a thoughtful tone. "Go on, what happened next?"

"He was intrigued by you," I admitted. "He didn't understand what you mean to us. To me."

"And what is that?"

"You know the family loves you."

"And you?" Bella shuffled forward a little and rested her warm little hands on my thighs. "What do I mean to _you_, Edward?"

I slowly raised my gaze to meet Bella's and saw that she was holding her breath. She was right. I hadn't told her how I felt, assuming that she would know in the worshipful way I monitored her every move.

"You are my life," I admitted. I leaned forward slightly and Bella unconsciously mirrored my body language. Our breath mingled as we sat resting our foreheads together. "I love you with everything I have."

I closed my eyes. Whatever Bella would think of me now, surely she would no longer doubt my feelings for her. Clothing rustled as Bella reached up to cup my face in her hands.

"Oh Edward," Bella whispered and I felt my chest begin to crack and splinter at the grief I could hear in her voice. "You tell me that now, but you didn't hesitate to throw me away."

I ducked my head.

"Look at me," she commanded, and I looked up to see her eyes welling up. "Is that what love is to you? That you'll turn your back on it when the going gets rough?"

"I was trying to protect you," I burst out. "It was the only way I knew how."

"You could have told me," Bella remonstrated. Her hands felt cold now, either from prolonged contact with my skin or nervousness, I couldn't be sure.

"There wasn't time," I mumbled now.

Bella looked disbelieving at this and so I went on.

"He knew where you lived and Lauren was no accident. He was deliberately hunting you Bella. I did what I felt was best to try to keep you safe."

"And suddenly I had no say in the matter," Bella looked sad at this. "Don't you think that I would have wanted to stay by your side? It just feels like at the first sign of danger you couldn't get rid of me fast enough." She squeezed her eyes shut as she sighed, trying to process the situation. "Perhaps you were right," she shrugged, "maybe I _am_ a liability."

"Don't say that," I snapped.

"Well it sure as hell feels like it right now," Bella gave me a blazing look now, her sadness warming in anger. "Am I a novelty for you? Are you going to deny what we have the next time we hit a bump in the road?"

"James is more than a bump," I chided her. "People are dying."

"You think I don't know that?" Bella's face was increasing in colour. "But what's it going to be next time that has you leaving me?"

"Bella," I began. "Please understand-,"

"Oh I'm trying to," she interrupted.

"_Please_," I could hear the pleading note in my voice now, "please try to understand. I could see James's thoughts. I could see what he wanted to do you and it made me-," I stopped and swallowed, "scared."

"So scared that you ran," Bella sighed. "Is that what you think love is? Is that the price of immortality, that you're too afraid to experience mortal feelings? That doesn't make you special, Edward, it makes you a coward."

"Perhaps," I agreed. "But I'm here now."

We looked at each other in silence for an agonising moment before Bella gave a slow nod.

"And so am I," she said. "Perhaps we're as bad as each other."

I released a long, shuddering sigh at her cautious words. James had me fearing for Bella's safety, but waiting for Bella's response had given me a taste of pure terror at the thought of her leaving me.

Bella raised a hand to stroke my cheek with gentle fingers and gave me a sad smile before leaning forward to press her lips against mine. We leaned into each other's embrace and the world fell away. Nothing else existed for me; nothing else mattered but her sweetness and warmth. She wrapped her arms around me and leaned back, gently urging me to follow her as she settled back against the pillows. Her tongue traced my lower lip but I kept my mouth resolutely closed. It wasn't until she tugged my shirt up from my jeans and ran her palm up and over my back that I gasped at the sensation and Bella made the most of the opportunity. Her tongue flickered against mine before retreating, and this time I was the one that followed. I broke away with a hoarse groan and stared at her with wide eyes. She was sprawled across the pillows like a cotton-clad siren as she gazed me with heavy eyes.

"What is it?" Bella whispered. "Are the others home?"

I shook my head as I gazed at her.

"Then what is it? What do you need?"

"More," I muttered as I lunged at her, running my tongue up her neck to suckle her earlobe as she gave a squirm of delight.

"Oh god," she moaned as she curled and undulated against me.

We fumbled and ground our bodies together as we both sought enough friction to generate the release our bodies demanded, and Bella whimpered as I ran my hand along the back of her thigh before hitching her leg over my hip. Her fingers tangled in my hair as she tried to hold me closer still. Her heart pounded in my ears and her blood …

I pulled back and gazed at her, watching as Bella smiled at the intensity of my regard.

"Do it," she whispered, and so that there would be no doubt what she meant, she turned her head to present her neck.

She held her breath as I leaned forward, releasing it in a sigh as I pressed my lips against the vein that pulsed and throbbed invitingly. I lapped at her skin, telling myself that I could all but taste her blood through the thin membrane.

"I'm not going to end your life," I whispered as she looked at me in confusion.

"You won't be ending it," she whispered back. "I'd get to share my existence with you, where's the end in that?"

"Not like this," I shook my head. I shifted slightly to keep my weight off her upper body.

"Oh really?" Bella indicated the bed we were on with a simple raised eyebrow. "It doesn't seem a bad way to start."

"You know what I mean," I replied and began to shift away, stopping when Bella tightened her legs around my waist.

Another impasse. No matter how close we'd start to get there was always an eternal wall between us. I was a vampire, and she was a human. Still, with everything that had happened perhaps I could hope that things could be different.

"Just give me … I need time to figure us out."

"Okay," Bella said as she pulled me down for another kiss, "but don't be too long. You might have forever, but I don't."

I was silent as I considered her words, and settled my head against the soft warmth of her chest, resolving to count her heartbeat for as long as I could. Perhaps she was the whole reason I became a vampire, so that I could live long enough to meet her. The others would be home soon and then the discussion about how we would protect our life and loves against the nomads. For the time being however we remained curled in each other's arms, in the calm before the storm.

_**A/N: Coming soon, the next chapter of Tailor Made! (wipes brow)**_


	20. Chapter 20

_Disclaimer: Not mine._

_Remember me? Very apologetic A/N to follow at the end … _

**Songlines Ch20 **

The bedroom could only provide us with sanctuary from the outside world for so long. Bella was curled in my arms, her fingertips tracing the line of my jaw and throat over and over until I was mindlessly relaxed. It was the closest sensation to sleep I could imagine, all thanks to her.

_Edward, we're home. _

It was Esme. I stirred with considerable reluctance and looked at Bella who was regarding me with her chin on my chest.

"They're outside," I explained, smiling as she stifled a yawn. "I know they'll want to see you but if you'd rather sleep I can …," I paused as Bella gave me an indignant look.

"I want to see them too," she said as she pushed herself up into a sitting position. "Maybe when all this is over you and I can actually have some quiet time together." She eased herself off the bed and gave a quick stretch.

"I think I'd like that," I agreed. I wasn't expecting the brilliant smile that my off-hand comment received. "What?"

"You're thinking of a future with me in it," Bella gave me a soft kiss. "Perhaps there's hope for you yet. Come on, let's go see the family." With that comment she towed me towards the door. By the time we were halfway down the stairs the front door of the house opened with a bang and Emmett appeared.

"Bella," his voice boomed through the foyer.

"Here," Bella answered, giving a shocked gasp of laughter when Emmett appeared in front of her in a show of vampire speed. Her laugh turned into a squeak as Emmett picked her up for an exuberant hug.

I stepped forward with the intention of calming him down until I realised he was cradling her as gently as he could. Excitement aside he was still aware of Bella's human fragility.

_So good to see her can't believe Edward thought that she was- Crap. Sorry._

Emmett set Bella down on her feet and turned to me with a sheepish expression.

"I know," I sighed. "I caught it."

"Sorry," Emmett apologised again and stepped aside to let Alice get to Bella for a hug.

One by one I watched my family step forward. Perhaps some people would have watched the careful exchanges and seen a joyful welcome home. From where I stood however, I was watching my family jostle each other in their bid to re-establish a connection with someone they had thought lost to them forever. Even Rosalie stepped forward to offer a quiet acknowledgement that Bella graciously accepted. I smiled as Esme enfolded Bella in a careful hug followed by Carlisle who was smiling fit to burst. All the while Alice stood beside Bella, touching her hair and shoulders with fluttering hands as if wanting to reassure herself over and over that Bella was really back.

In the excitement Alice's controls had become soft and so I was able to snatch the occasional vision as they appeared. Bella laughing up at me and trying to out-run me in a hunt, dozens of scenes showing me her golden eyes over and over. Alice stopped with a quiet growl and flexed her mental muscle shutting me out once more.

_You've seen enough_, she warned, _and even that was more than you deserve._

Alice may have thought the visions were an undeserved reward but she couldn't have been more wrong. Seeing Bella as one of us – truly one of us – had given me a burst of savage joy that faded just as quickly when I realised one pertinent fact. For Bella to become my mate, she was going to have to die. I leaned against the wall, keeping myself distant from the group as I tried to process the concept.

"Hey," Jasper moved to stand quiet at my side. "Focus."

"What?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Look at what's happening _now_. I think we all know that worrying over what _could_ happen has gotten you into enough trouble lately."

I gave a quiet huff at this and then schooled my expression into something more benign when Bella gave me a questioning look. Jasper was smiling as he moved from my side, soaking up the goodwill in the room as he drifted from one person to the next like a plant following the sun.

"Bella it's late, have you eaten?" Esme was fussing now, brushing Bella's hair off her shoulders with gentle hands. The maternal gesture wasn't wasted on Bella who gave her a brilliant smile.

"I have, they looked after me," Bella replied with a nod, glancing sideways when Alice gave a quiet huff of annoyance. "They _did_," she said in a pointed tone.

"I'll have to take your word for it," Alice muttered as she reached out and took Bella by the hand and leading her towards the couch. Esme followed in close orbit. All I could do was follow.

"Look at them," Rosalie observed in a wry tone to Emmett. "They've got their pet back." She had pitched her voice quietly enough that Bella wouldn't hear but the rest of us certainly did.

"Soon to be sister, if Alice is right," Emmett commented. _'Bout time too. Really thought he'd dropped the ball on this one and then he would've been hell to-._ He tried to stop his thoughts with a mental snap but they bled through his haphazard control. I raised an eyebrow at him and got an unapologetic shrug by way of response. His inner monologue continued, all the while flavoured with approval and affection as he considered Bella's reinstatement into the fold.

"I seem to recall a certain someone fluttering around Emmett back in the day," Carlisle commented as he walked past her to take a seat with the others.

"Not like that," Rosalie blustered in quiet protest. She waved a hand to indicate Alice and Esme sitting either side of Bella has they fell into an easy conversation.

"Don't be so sure," Carlisle's eyelid flickered at me as he tried to hide his amusement from her. "We all have our ways and you, my darling Rosalie, are no exception."

Rosalie crossed her arms at this and frowned and this apparent show of weakness. Undeterred as always, Emmett pulled her to his side and gave her a noisy kiss, grinning when she gave a half-hearted squirm of protest.

_Gotcha,_ he regarded his mate with considerable satisfaction in a way that had me wishing for a fraction of Alice's shielding control.

"It's good that we're all together again," Carlisle commented, pitching his voice loud enough for Bella to hear this time as he sat down. Esme shifted away from Bella's side with a final pat and moved to sit beside Carlisle.

Bella looked up at me with an expectant smile and I sat down beside her. She immediately curled against my side, her hand resting on my thigh in a gesture that both claimed and reassured.

Jasper gave a quiet mental hum of satisfaction.

"So," Bella said when everyone had settled down, "where to from here?"

"We could leave," I said immediately, ignoring Emmett when he groaned. "Just the two of us, and go somewhere safe."

"There's no place he can't track you," Alice said with an inward gaze.

"So we stay and fight?" Emmett's tone was hopeful.

We all turned to look at Alice, who was already gazing where we could not follow. Her expression flickered between bewilderment and exasperation.

"It's not … he … I can't," she stuttered as she followed James from one vision to the next." Her concentration was such that her control had slipped again, letting me join her in the search. The locations flickered from one to the next in a blur impossible for human eyes to follow. "He's looking for her," Alice answered my unspoken question.

"What?" Bella frowned with confusion as she looked from Alice to myself.

"James," I blinked as I emerged from Alice's mind. "He's tracking."

Alice looked at me with frightened eyes. "It won't take him long, he's getting closer all the time."

"Closer to us?" Bella asked. She unconsciously clenched her hand on my thigh.

"To you," Alice clarified nodding to the woman at my side. _And if we're not careful, Edward, he's going to get her._

"How?" I breathed.

"I can't see that far ahead, but some of the choices he's making keep bringing him here, to the reservation, to-," she checked herself and flickered an apologetic look to Bella.

"Jacob?" Bella thrumming heartbeat began to quicken. "Angela? Which one?"

"Both," Alice admitted, looking unhappy. Jasper moved to take her hand as the mood in the room began to dip.

"This is bullshit," Emmett muttered. "What are we doing just sitting here?"

"If he's that good a tracker why didn't he find me earlier?" Bella asked as she shifted again. Any closer and she be sitting in my lap, not that I had any objection.

"We're not sure," Carlisle replied after a thoughtful pause. "It seems that you've been hidden from more than Alice over the last few days."

"I don't … what?" Bella shook her head.

"Alice couldn't see you while you were with … the others," I murmured to her.

"It wasn't for lack of trying," Alice explained with an apologetic shrug.

"Right," Bella nodded. "So you were looking for me?"

"You have no idea," Alice muttered.

"Uh-huh," Bella shot me a sidelong look. "Leaving town huh? Never see you again? Seems like someone here had a double standard."

"You know why," I whispered. I didn't know if I would ever be able to find enough words to express my regret for what I had done to her. Words were cheap and for now, all I wanted to do was take her back upstairs and twine myself around her body. I wanted to hold her close and lose myself in her until time and things were done.

_Edward …_

It was Jasper and I gave a minute nod of acknowledgement. No more hiding. No more running.

"Bella," Alice said and then gave a delicate pause. "The people you were with, they're a little different. You know that, right?"

"You could say that," Bella replied after a considered silence. "While I was there they told the stories of their tribe. An oral history I guess. There was a Council meeting on the second night. I'm one of the few outsiders they've allowed to listen in because my Dad and one of the elders have always been good friends."

"Go on," Carlisle encouraged with a careful nod. He could already see where this was going but this was something for Bella to say in her own words.

_So hard for her ... _ I looked over at Esme who was watching Bella with obvious sympathy. All of us knew the legends of the Quileute tribe, we had even been active participants in the creation of some of them. As much as Bella knew about us it must have been another thing entirely to hear about us from someone else who regarded us with far less charity than Bella with her remarkable capacity for understanding. Bella was learning about the subterranean world that existed beneath the one she knew, and there was nothing we could to do to stop the tide of information.

It was bad enough that she even knew of our existence. It was miraculous that even knowing this she could still offer love. What would she do when she discovered that everything she had thought she knew turned out to be little more than a veneer of civilisation over claws and bloodlust? Whatever her reaction would be, the only thing I could count on would be that she would no doubt surprise us all.

Bella gave us all a wry smile.

"Let's just say that with everything else that I've found out lately, listening to their legends didn't exactly come as a surprise."

"Did they mention any outsiders?" Carlisle put the question to her as delicately as he could, leaning forward as he spoke.

"Not by name, but you were there," Bella nodded. She glanced from Carlisle to Esme and then across at me. "I'm right aren't I? They talked about the Cold Ones and a treaty that was agreed upon."

"That would be us," Carlisle agreed, "and the treaty has held firm for generations now."

"Oh," Bella raised an eyebrow as a thought occurred to her, "that's why you couldn't come to me when I was on the Res."

"I got as close as I could," I allowed.

"And yet I still had to make the first move," Bella jibed with a smile to smooth the edge of her words. She turned back to Carlisle. "So what's your point? Are you trying to tell me that you're not the only dangerous thing out there?"

"Something like that," Carlisle replied. "I must say Bella that you have a startling propensity for seeing into the heart of a matter."

"Is that a nice way to say I over-simplify?" Bella asked me sotto voce.

"Not entirely," Carlisle argued.

Bella blushed when she realised that all of us in the room and not just myself, had heard her self-deprecating remark.

"It seems that you're able to follow strategies and motivations in certain scenarios," Carlisle went on. He regarded her for a long moment, his eyes thoughtful as he worked though a few theories. "Interesting," he ventured at last. _Combined with your talent Edward, you'll make a formidable pair. _Carlisle and I exchanged a long glance. His mind was racing from one possibility to the next as he tried to guess what Bella's talent might be once she was changed. _She's your singer; perhaps you were genetically engineered to find each other_. Carlisle was becoming increasingly intrigued as his mind sped from one theory to the next. _Singer. That could be a key component. There's enough anecdotal evidence over the centuries to suggest blood singers are more than a random occurrence. Edward could be the first to have been able to resist the attraction._

"If you'll excuse me, I believe I have some research to do." Carlisle stood up, trailing his fingertips along Esme's forearm before he moved away. Esme watched him with a gentle smile as he moved with deliberate human speed up the staircase towards his study.

"Carlisle seems pleased with himself about something," Bella observed.

"He has a few ideas that he wants to explore," I replied. I wasn't sure how to describe Carlisle's level of curiosity. Perhaps fascination was a better word. Our lifestyle was one of choice, and whilst it wasn't an easy one we all adhered to it as best we could. Rosalie and Carlisle had found their mates by way of a combination of loneliness and circumstance. Alice's visions had given her a level of knowledge that eluded the rest of us, but Carlisle was speculating that seemed that the arrival of Bella amongst our midst hinted at pre-destiny.

I glanced at Bella who was still watching the stairs Carlisle had taken. The column of her throat was exposed as she turned her head, and my gaze went unerringly to her throbbing pulse. Bella turned to see my starting at her and she narrowed her eyes in speculation.

"You need to hunt," she stated. Her tone of voice wasn't a suggestion, simply a statement of fact. "Your eyes are-," she waved a hand towards my face.

The gesture was enough to distract me from my almost hypnotic regard of her pulse.

"What?"

"Your eyes are almost black," Bella replied. "How long did you wait for me at the res, three days? Didn't you hunt at all during that time?"

"No," I shrugged. "I waited for you. Nothing else seemed to matter."

"Really?" Bella looked almost shy at my admission but rallied quickly. "Well I'm here now, which means if I'm going to eat something you should too."

"She's got a point," Rosalie spoke up, taking us by surprise as she had been all but wrapped around Emmett. "You need to get yourself something before you throw caution to the wind and decide Bella's your snack of choice after all."

Emmett snorted against her neck but nodded his agreement. Critical gazes turned in my direction as I tried to slouch further into the cushions in silent protest. Having only just gotten Bella back, to say I was reluctant to leave her behind again was an understatement.

"I'm with Rosie on this one," Jasper commented. "C'mon Edward. You're not doing yourself any favours."

"Three against one, do I hear any further bids?" Bella chimed in with a sly grin.

"Bella, I thought you said you'd eaten?" Esme was quick to pounce on the opportunity to mother.

"Well," now it was Bella who squirmed a little in her seat. "Technically yes, but-,"

"Hot chocolate," Alice broke in with a smile.

"Of course," Esme agreed as she shot Alice a warm look as she got up from her seat. She patted my shoulder in passing as she made her way towards the kitchen. "Off you go."

Alice and Esme were radiating pleasure over the simple task of preparing a snack for Bella that Jasper couldn't help but follow in their direction. That left four of us in the living room, two of which were watching Bella and I with more interest than I was comfortable with.

"Come on," I protested in a mild voice.

"Seriously, how old are you?" Bella shook her head.

"Considerably older than you," I groused as I felt any chance of holding Bella just a little longer start to slip away.

"Sometimes I wonder," Bella muttered in response. She tucked her legs beneath her so that she could twist and squirm to end up kneeling on the cushion beside me. Reaching towards my face she traced the shadows beneath my eyes with gentle fingertips. My eyes closed, the better to follow the trail of warmth her touch left on my skin. I heard the shift of fabric as she leaned closer still and brushed her lips against mine. "Go hunt."

"You heard the lady," Emmett's voice cut across our absorption with each other and Bella broke away from the kiss with a puff of quiet amusement.

Emmett was sprawled on one of the other couches regarding us with amusement. Rosalie was still curled against his side and was … I paused with surprise as her thoughts filtered through. She was counting Bella's heartbeats almost absent-mindedly. My hesitation had been imperceptible to Bella but Rosalie's gaze met mine in perfect understanding.

Without moving a muscle Rosalie still contrived to give the sense of a casual mental shrug. _I'm not sure about any of this, but she's good for you and I guess that's good enough for me. Just count those beats of hers while you can, Edward. They'll be a long time gone._

"I'll be fine," Bella urged as she clamoured off the couch and held out a hand to me to follow her lead. "You go do what you gotta do."

I shook my head as I bemusedly followed her lead.

"What?" Bella cocked her head and looked up at me.

"Just the way you say it," I began and stopped when Bella pulled a face.

"Yeah I know, so much for the Literature student, right?"

"I'm not talking about the grammar," I reached out to pull her towards me, rubbing my hands over the small of her back. It seemed I couldn't get enough of touching her. She was really here, back with the family again. Bella had locked her arms around my waist as she waited for me to finish. It seemed she felt it as much as I did. Had it really only been a few days? "I'm talking about your acceptance of-," I shrugged. Now it was my turn to be inarticulate.

"Sumos quod sumos," Emmett said, then translated, "we are what we are," he nodded. "What?" he said when we both turned to look at him, "So you're not the only ones that crack a book now and then."

"C'mon, give me a kiss and then go eat."

Bella tilted her face towards me obligingly and I found myself dipping towards her for a kiss out of sheer reflex. Was this right? We had established that James was a distinct threat to her safety and now here we were discussing snacks.

"I don't want to leave you," I argued. I knew I wasn't going to win the discussion but had to state my case all the same.

"I know, but this time there's a difference."

"What's that?" I gazed into her warm regard that gave me no insights as to what she was going to say next. It was madding, fascinating and beguiling all at once.

"This time I know you don't want to go. Even better, I know you'll be coming back."

Bella took a half step back and stopped short when my arms remained immobile around her.

"I'll come back soon," I promised.

"I know," Bella nodded and then put her hands on my chest. "Seriously, Edward. You've _got_ to get out there. Technically you're a teenage guy, there's no way in hell it should be difficult to get you to eat something."

In the kitchen I heard Esme try to turn a laugh into a cough with little success.

"I'm going," I sighed as I loosened my grip around her and watched as she began to walk backwards towards the kitchen.

"So go already," Bella smiled.

"Oh for-," Rosalie sighed.

"I know, Babe," Emmett gave a martyred sigh from where they stood at the door. "How long do you think they'll be like this once she's changed?" His voice took on a breathy falsetto. "You go. No _you_ go. Miss you. Miss you _more. _Missing you from _here_."

"Right," I replied as I began to stalk towards the door. "Like you two were any better."

"Actually the first ten years were pretty hot," Emmett nodded.

"Just the first ten?" Rosalie asked with a smirk.

"Huh," Emmett grinned as he began to trip down memory lane. I had no idea what Emmett had been like as a human but could only assume that his poker face had been appalling. It didn't take any mind-reading abilities whatsoever to see the flavour his thoughts were taking. "Hey, Rose, remember that time you and I got so caught up in each other that-,"

"We get the hint, Em," Bella called, her face flushing a little as she laughed. I was going to miss that colour. I couldn't tell if she was starting to laugh at her own discomfort or my outdated sensibilities that sprang to the fore on her behalf.

"That's it, we're going," I called as I clapped my hand on Emmett's shoulder and pushed him out the door. The last thing I heard as the door closed behind us was Bella's giggle.

To my annoyance Rosalie insisted on driving us over a hundred miles away before letting us hunt. I chafed against this imposed exile from Bella, resolutely trying to ignore Emmett's teasing comments. Rosalie made me scan the area constantly to avoid any police patrols or undue attention. Not that any such scans would make any difference. She was driving at a speed that would make detection and any subsequent pursuit difficult.

"Anything?" Rosalie asked when Emmett had finished amusing himself at my expense.

"All clear," I sighed.

"Good," Rosalie muttered as she directed the car towards a cut-off road, slowing as the car left the sealed road surface and followed a dirt track that was quickly obscured from view by the undergrowth and trees that had flanked the road for the last few miles. Parking the car well away from any prying eyes we got out and stretched. I turned as the breeze carried a few faint scents in our direction.

"Bear," Emmett pronounced with satisfaction.

"Right," I nodded. It wasn't my preference, but it may have to do.

"Don't worry, I'm sure we'll find something to your liking," Emmett gave me a hearty clap on my back in passing. "Other than Bella, not that anything can top that."

"Emmett," I paused and shook my head in weary admonishment before following the path he had taken that lead deeper into the forest. "Are we going to have to have that conversation again?"

"Oh please," Rosalie snorted, "like that'd stop him."

"Babe," Emmett protested.

"Enough," I snapped. "We're here to hunt, let's just do it so I can get home."

_Sassy_.

I glared at Rosalie before breaking into a run. After a couple of miles she and Emmett caught up with I charitably slowed my pace. The scents on the wind began to vary and I heard Rosalie give an appreciative growl when she sensed deer nearby. Nothing appealed to me as much as the woman I knew was waiting for me at home, but I quashed my impatience and allowed the rapid heartbeats nearby pull me closer.

The blood would be warm and the deaths would be quick, but no part of the experience would be truly satisfying. It was something I just had to live with, and soon so would Bella.

"You look much better," Esme looked up from her book with a smile when I arrived back at the house a few hours later.

Rosalie and Emmett had, as always, found the hunt to be invigorating. The drive home had become more than I could endure. When their thoughts became more pronounced that usual and I had ordered Rosalie to drop the car so that I could disembark. Better to run home under my own speed than to put up with the lust-fuelled exuberance of their mental commentary. As it was they had decided to take their recreational activities elsewhere as the car was no-where in sight when I returned.

"Bella?" I glanced up after shedding my coat at the door and looked around the room. There was no mental hum of thought to guide me but her scent had already permeated the room again. It created a welcoming warmth that no crackling fire in the hearth or motherly smiles could replicate.

"Asleep upstairs," Esme replied. She glanced back at the book and resumed flicking through it in a blur of speed.

_She's fine, Edward. Just tired._ _We looked after her. _

I stopped to drop a kiss on Esme's head in passing. "I don't doubt that you did." I kept moving, not needing to look to know that she smiled.

_Alice and Jasper are outside, she's still looking for James and Jasper wants to check the property lines to see if anyone has come calling._

I stood in the hallway outside my room for a moment, enjoying the sensation of hearing Bella's steady breathing and heartbeat from within. Rosalie was right; the sound of her pulse was going to be a limited experience. A part of me rejoiced in that knowledge, but it was tempered with bittersweet regret because I was going to be responsible for ending her life.

The door opened soundlessly and I stood gazing at the woman curled up on my bed. Our bed. She had changed for sleep and I regarded the neatly folded clothes on my desk before I moved to the foot of the bed. Perhaps she sensed my presence, or something else had disturbed her sleep. In any case, I was unprepared for the overwhelming rush of feelings as she lifted her head from the pillow and gave me a sleepy, utterly guileless smile.

"Edward," she whispered.

There was nothing remarkable about this moment. It was simply another moment of countless millions in my existence, and yet I was utterly blindsided by it. Bella nestled in my bed as if she had always belonged there, my name a warm and loving whisper on her lips. It was enough to bring me to my knees beside the bed so that we would gaze at each other eye to eye. Bella wormed a hand out from beneath the covers, reaching out to find my hand already searching for hers. Our fingers tangled and she pulled me closer for a kiss, giving a soft hum of pleasure when we parted.

"Missed you," she murmured with another heavy-lidded smile.

I swallowed hard. To think that I had considered giving her up was the right thing to do was unthinkable now and forever. She blinked as she began to wake up and gave a slight frown.

"Why aren't you getting in here with me?"

"Into bed?" I raised an eyebrow at this, my mother's upbringing echoing in the back of my mind. Given the alluring vision before me however, I found my inner censor was a monotone that was wilfully silenced as I stood up and toed off my shoes. Bella half rolled onto her back to watch me as I unbuttoned my shirt, discarding it carelessly onto the floor. Socks went next, although in deference to my own modesty I kept my jeans on as I crawled into bed behind her. She made a small sound of disappointment when she felt my denim clad thighs behind her own, but seemed content enough when I wrapped my arms around her to pull her back flush against my chest.

"I didn't want you to get to cold," I explained, my breath a puff against her ear as I hooked my chin over her shoulder to nestle against her warmth.

She nodded and squirmed a little, trying to get as close to me as possible. I gritted my teeth as her restless movements brought her into glorious contact. She shivered with delight as I trailed kisses along her throat, and I rubbed a hand along her arm in a bid to warm her. A foolish gesture given the difference in our body temperatures, but it was a instinctive gesture that reassured us both. My hand trailed further, following the curve of her hip over the fabric of her t-shirt and then … my hand stopped as I gave a start of surprise. I propped myself up on one elbow to peer down at her.

"What are you wearing?"

Bella blinked owlishly at me in the dark room.

"Not much," she admitted. "Why, is that wrong?"

"No. Yes. I mean no, I don't think so," I stuttered. I should have snatched my hand away from the bare thigh I had encountered, and yet I couldn't seem to make myself move. Bella bit her lip to hide her smile, not realising I could see her with perfect clarity.

"Relax, Edward. I'm in my underwear and a t-shirt. I just wanted to be comfortable. Is that okay?"

"Sure," I replied on autopilot. Bella's comfort levels were of paramount importance to me. My comfort levels however, were another matter entirely. I tried to shift my hips away from hers with as much stealth as I could muster.

"Where are you going?" Bella looked over her shoulder at me and then rolled over so that we were facing each other.

"Nowhere," I replied, my hand rubbing a reassuring pattern on her upper arm as I inched my hips away from hers. This situation was entirely foreign to me and was one that I had no idea how to navigate. Fortunately for the both of us, Bella had other ideas.

"Doesn't feel like nowhere," Bella answered. Now she was the one moving closer. Our feet tangled together in a way that insinuated one of my knees between hers as she coiled against me.

"You'll get cold," I tried to protest, but it was a weak effort at best and we both knew it. "You need to sleep while you can because we don't know-."

"Edward," Bella interrupted my pathetic attempts at moderating the situation. "You need to shut up and kiss me now." With that, she leaned forward to press her lips against mine and the room was quiet again. She reached up to wrap an arm around my shoulder to bring her body closer still as our kiss deepened.

For now there was no James. No Victoria. No threat in the future to worry about whatsoever. All I could focus on was the feeling of her breasts pressing against my chest and the warmth of her skin beneath my hands. Any loving admonishments delivered to me in my childhood had vanished as I wilfully ran my hands over as much of Bella's skin as I could. I traced the line of her thigh, hesitating at the curve of her knee before gently hitching her leg over my hip.

Bella's sigh of encouragement took on a keening quality as she hooked her leg around me to hold me closer to her. She lapped at the seam of my mouth and I relented. For all that we were all but controlled by our hormones at this point, Bella had still retained some measure of her questionable survival instinct. Her tongue curled against mine with commendable restraint.

The sun was well on its ascent, daylight flooding into the bedroom before Bella stirred and frowned as she began to wake up. I watched as she blinked a few times, licking her lips before croaking a weary 'good morning' at me. So much for sleep, I realised guilty. Bella had only managed to snatch a few hours here and there in between kisses and murmured promises of our mutual devotion.

"You look thoughtful," Bella observed at last, reaching up to trail a finger between my brows.

"I am," I admitted.

"Guess that's where not having to sleep comes in handy," Bella yawned as she burrowed against my chest. "What's on your mind?"

"What you said last night," I said, choosing my words carefully as I considered and discarded countless strategies for the coming days. "Your suggestion that James wanted to separate us for sport feels … right."

"Mmmph," Bella nodded into my shirt for me to continue.

"Alice hasn't been able to see what he's up to which means that someone else might be making the decisions, or doing it in such a way that they're seemingly random enough to elude her." Bella yawned again, her warm, moist breath puffing against my chest and I reached up to card her hair with my fingers.

"He'll have to reveal himself sooner or later," Bella mumbled. She was taking longer than usual to wake up and was fighting it all the way, but the conversation was catching her interest. "When he does, we're stronger together than we'll ever be apart."

"Yes," I nodded slowly at this. "Had I stayed away he would have picked away at us."

"Or at me," Bella clarified, which earned another reluctant nod. She had already lost an acquaintance to James's notion of 'sport'. I could not bear her to experience that kind of trauma again, although knew that such was beyond my control. "Which is another reason to stay together."

"I know," I carefully tightened my arms around her. "I've been thinking about that while you slept."

"And what's your verdict?"

"You were right," I said at last, "all this time you were right. This isn't about me being a vampire, or you being human. It's about us, and how we feel about each other."

Bella lifted her head from my chest to gaze up at me for a long moment before offering an encouraging smile.

"That's what I've been trying to tell you."

**A/N: I'm back! I'm so very sorry that it has taken me such a long time to update this. My life was getting over-accessorised to say the least, and I hit burnout. All – and I mean ALL – of my characters went absolutely silent on me for a few weeks. That freaked me out until I realised that my creativity had probably shut down so that I could recharge my batteries. **

**Thankfully I'm back writing again (I've missed this!) and the updates should be a bit more regular in future.**

**Thanks for your patience guys. I know this chapter is a little shorter than my usual offering, but normal service will resume very soon.**


	21. Chapter 21

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight_

**Songlines Ch21**

"I can't believe we're doing this," Alice admitted as we parked the car.

"How can you say that? You were chirping last night about how you'd _seen_ this happening," Bella protested as I held the door open for her to disembark.

"Yeah well, I thought maybe someone else would have a different idea and we'd be doing something else," Alice replied as she took Jasper's hand and we set off across campus.

"Maybe next time," Bella offered a consoling pat on Alice's shoulder before we began to split away from them towards the direction of our morning lecture. "Of course, you could have always stayed at home," she suggested, and smiled at Alice's huff of indignation.

"Remind me again why we're doing this?" I asked as Bella nodded a greeting to some passing students.

"We're doing this because life goes on," Bella replied under her breath as she offered another smile to a passer by.

"And on, and on," I sighed.

"Whatever," Bella replied with a careless wave. "I've got a paper due so I need to be at this class."

I shot her a curious glance but Bella kept her gaze resolutely forward as we walked towards the lecture hall. I didn't broach the subject again until we were sat in our usual seats at the back of the room. Bella seemed to be fussing unduly with her bag, setting it at her feet just so, aligning her notebook and pens with careful precision.

"Are you okay?" I murmured when she stopped fidgeting and sat when her attention resolutely focussed on the tutor who was getting ready to begin.

"Mm-hmm," she nodded.

I regarded her for a moment and then carefully reached out to take her hand. Her heart rate was thrumming at a faster pace than usual. My fingertips sought out her pulse as an automatic reflex. Rosalie's words occurred to me.

_Count her heartbeats while you can Edward, they will be a long time gone._

As gently as I could, I traced the veins in her wrist, counting the beats all the while.

o * o * o * o

There had been extensive conversation the previous evening about the need to keep Bella safe. Once again I had raised the possibility of spiriting her away to somewhere that could be better defended. Unsurprisingly the loudest opponent to any of these offerings came from Bella herself.

"Don't you see what he's doing?" Bella had leaned forward in her seat to make her point. "He's trying to split us all up so that he can pick us off one by one. We're stronger together."

"As a family," Esme had mused, and her careful smile grew stronger when Bella gave a firm nod of agreement.

"You've got more balls than I gave you credit for," Rosalie drawled.

"Talk to this one," Bella gave me a nudge with her shoulder. "We established that I'm a no running, no screaming kind of woman."

"I don't like it," Carlisle looked unhappy but even he could see that Bella could not be swayed. "Surely you can postpone your classes until the danger has passed."

"I could," Bella agreed, "but we don't know how long that will take and I've got a paper due."

"That's what you're worried about?" Jasper scoffed at this, subsiding when Bella looked affronted.

"I've never handed in a late paper and I'm not about to start now," she said in a firm voice.

"Yes but surely-," Carlisle began to object but Bella waved him off.

"No way, no how am I going to front up to my lecturer and say I need an extension because a vampire's out to get me. They'd put me away," she concluded with gloomy relish.

Jasper considered her for a moment longer and then coughed to hide his amusement.

"Oh sure, laugh it up soldier boy," Bella chided. "It's okay for you, how many degrees have you guys got?"

"More than enough," Jasper conceded.

"And this is my first one, so c'mon guys, let me do it right this time around and then we'll take it from there. Besides, you'll be with me tomorrow and he's not about to try something in broad daylight. Let's think positive," Bella suggested.

We all turned as one to stare at her and she shrugged off the weight of our regard.

"I just think that positive emotion will trump negative emotion is all," was all she said.

o * o * o * o

Fine words to be sure, but now we were dealing with the reality of being together while the threat of James grew closer. As we had walked across campus I had left it to Bella to present the social façade. She had smiled and exchanged greetings as I studied our surroundings, scenting and tasting the air with every wind shift. I didn't allow myself to relax until we were sitting in the lecture hall, and even then I remained on alert.

"Will you calm down, you're making me nervous," Bella muttered as she slouched lower in her seat.

"I'm fine," I shot back in an undertone as I kept my attention on her pulse.

"Right, so looking like you're ready to rip someone's head off if they so much as sneeze in my direction is perfectly normal?"

That got my attention. I looked away from her and scanned the room, noticing Mike as he flinched away from my regard.

"I just feel very … protective of you right now."

"Mm-hmm," Bella replied, "and that's different from all the other times … how?"

"Back then I was the only threat," I muttered. Bella turned and gazed at me in silence until I felt that it was my turn to slouch down into my seat.

"How noble," she murmured. She shifted her wrist away from my scrutiny so that she could lace her fingers with my own. "Just so you know, I can look after myself."

"I'm not saying you can't, but I want to help."

"I know," Bella admitted. She shifted in her seat so that we were sitting shoulder to shoulder. Six heartbeats went by and she relaxed enough to rest her head on my shoulder. "I didn't see this coming," she commented.

"None of us did," I replied, closing my eyes as I took in as much of her warm scent as I could.

"Except Alice," she corrected.

"Except Alice," I agreed.

"Whatever happens, we're good." Bella lifted her head to look at me, "as long as we're together."

Before I could reply the lecturer cleared his throat and called for everyone's attention. Bella looked to the front of the class, her focus on our topic of conversation diverted for the time being.

I gave a good impression of someone listening intently to the class, but all I could think of were Bella's words. My idea of keeping her safe was to break her heart and yet still she insisted of remaining by my side. It seemed that her decision was one that the whole family supported. I may have been older, but it was open to speculation as to who was wiser. Bella gave my hand a gentle squeeze. I felt nothing but smiled at the gesture.

o * o * o * o

"Was that so hard?"

"No," I sighed. The class had been useless as far as I was concerned but Bella seemed to feel satisfied with the outcome. "It really matters that much to you?"

"It does," Bella nodded. She had submitted her paper at the conclusion of the class and was walking by my side with an air of satisfaction.

"I don't suppose I can persuade you to ditch your study session?"

"Well," Bella wavered at this, much to my surprise. After her insistence on following through on her obligations it seemed that the afternoon was open to negotiation. Before I could offer any temptations however, Bella's cell phone shrilled in her pocket. She let go of my hand so that she could retrieve the handset; her pace slowed as she studied the small screen.

"Problem?" I ventured in a mild tone.

"Not really, although you might think so," Bella replied as she reached up to twirl her ponytail as she thought. That was enough to tell me that she was uncertain as to how to proceed.

"What is it?"

"They need help at the bookstore," she said at last, "it's only for a couple of hours."

"No," I stated categorically.

"Hey, c'mon," Bella gave me a defiant look, "it's not all day and I could use the money."

"We've _got_ money. Plenty of money."

"Are we going to have that talk about my independence again?" Bella arched an eyebrow.

"All I'm trying to say is that you don't need to work while there's," I stopped when I saw Bella's carefully blank expression. "Can we at least agree that I'll stand guard?"

"You've got a class you should be at," Bella remonstrated as she reached for my hand and began to walk in the general direction of the bookstore. "Anyways, the mysterious Edward Cullen standing outside the store with nothing to do will look suspicious."

"How about one of the others? Jasper?" I suggested.

"Uh," Bella stumbled at this and I pounced on her hesitation.

"Stronger together, remember?"

"Dammit," she gave a breathless laugh. "Guess I'm not used to being wrapped in cotton wool like this all the time. It's …," she waved an inarticulate hand.

"Stifling?" I suggested.

"Confronting," she answered. "I've never had to live like this before."

"It's because we want to make sure you do just that, _live_."

"What are my alternatives?" Bella sidled closer to me as we walked and I took the hint and put my arm around her waist to draw her close.

"That you say no to the store and stay with me," I replied immediately and then smiled to myself. Bella noticed.

"What's so funny?"

"I seem to recall a time when thinking that leaving you alone was the kindest thing to do. Allowing things to follow the natural progression," I mused.

"What's your idea of a natural progression?" Bella asked.

"You would live out your life; a human life." I frowned a little as I said this. Bella thought she had so much to gain by choosing a life with my family, but she had to know the cost. We were nearly at the bookstore now. The crowds were thickening as students milled around the entry to the store and the nearby café. I scanned every face and mind that I could, ever mindful of the pocket of silence that walked at my side.

Bella looked thoughtful as I navigated us through the crowds.

"You'd watch me grow old by your side and then die? You'd leave me to go where you can't follow?" Bella looked sad at this and I slowed our pace as I ducked my head towards hers to speak in a low voice so that no-one would overhear our sombre conversation.

"I would miss you more than I could bear, but we would have had our time together."

"A limited time," Bella contradicted, jerking her chin and offering a quick smile to a called greeting before returning her attention back to me. "Why sell yourself short?"

"What is it that you want?"

"I want more," she said. "I want it all."

I was about to answer when Bella stopped in her tracks staring ahead with surprise.

Although she was carefully dressed in 'student casual' chic Rosalie stood out from the humans around her. She had been leaning against the doorway pretending to focus on her iPhone but was still the recipient of many admiring stares.

"Where did you come from?" Bella called as we approached.

Rosalie had been careful to demonstrate a lack of commitment to Bella's presence, save for a grudging acceptance in social settings. It seemed that given recent events she had decided to ratchet things up a bit, no doubt with Emmett's careful encouragement.

"Emmett wanted to check the place out, and Alice just told us what was going on," Rosalie shrugged off Bella's surprise. "Figured I'd swing by and see how things were."

"And this is you trying to act casual?" Bella was trying to hide a grin without much success. "Gotta say that it's not working. You kinda stand out."

To give her credit, Rosalie tried not to preen _too_ much. I closed my eyes briefly against her mental hum of satisfaction, let alone the male approval in our immediate vicinity. She paced forward to stand a few feet away from Bella.

"When you say you want it all, you're forgetting something. Soon there's something you'll want even more than Edward."

I bristled as Rosalie referred to me as if I wasn't even there but held my tongue.

"What's that?" Bella asked. She unconsciously shuffled closer until her hip was pressed firmly against my own. I wormed my hand beneath the hem of her shirt and rubbed my thumb against her skim. Bella gave a ripple of reaction against my cold touch but subsided almost immediately.

"Blood," Rosalie said. She held Bella's gaze for a long moment before glancing over at my mutinous expression. "I know you think you know what we are, but theory is one thing, practice is entirely different."

"Humans thirst just as much for water," Bella said after a careful pause.

"True," Rosalie conceded the point with a nod, "but nothing has to die in order for you to get it. You could go vegetarian and drink water that falls from the sky without ever having to take a life. How does that rate against killing something every time your throat burns? Do you still think it's worth it?"

I growled under my breath, stopping when a passing student flinched and moved away without realising why. I watched him flick an anxious glance over his shoulder at the three people talking so intensely in the walkway before he rounded the corner. We were getting attention but for the time being it seemed innocuous enough.

"Yes," Bella lifted her chin. "It's my choice."

Rosalie and Bella held each other's gaze for a long moment and then to my surprise, Rosalie was the first to break.

"Alright then," Rosalie nodded. _I know you're pissed, Edward. Just testing, and by the way, your girl's passed. Emmett and I will search the area and let you know if there's anything to worry about._

"Just like that?" Bella blinked.

"See you tonight," Rosalie offered. "Emmett's going to stay here a while and Carlisle is going to want to discuss some more options when you get home."

"I'm sure he does," I replied in a tight voice. It rankled me that Rosalie had been so deliberately provocative towards Bella. How many more tests were we going to have to face?

Rosalie looked amused as she turned and strolled away. Approaching groups of students parted and reformed in her wake. She never looked back.

"What the hell was that?" Bella looked up at me in bewilderment.

"Believe it or not, that was Rosalie being supportive."

"O-kay," Bella sounded dubious, "good to know. I guess." She looked at the bookstore entrance and then gave me an artificially bright smile. "I guess I'll see you later."

"No guessing required," I murmured as I pulled her close for a gentle kiss. "We'll be here."

"Who's we?"

"Myself, Alice, Jasper," I recited. "We'll be watching."

"Perv," Bella wrinkled her nose at me and gave me another quick kiss before she turned and entered the store. I watched her go and licked the taste of her from my lips.

I hesitated outside a while longer, turning away with a reluctant laugh when Bella appeared in the store window making shooing motions with her hands as she urged me on my way. I walked away with careful nonchalance, resolving to backtrack and watch the store as best I could.

o * o * o * o

Three hours later I looked up from my casual lean against a pillar as Bella approached. She stepped up against me with a warm smile and slid her arms around my waist as she tilted her face expectantly for a kiss. I obliged and felt the curve of her lips as she smiled.

"How was your afternoon?" She announced when she came up for air.

"So-so," I shrugged.

I hadn't gone to class of course. I had maintained my vigil at a careful distance. Close enough to monitor the comings and goings of the store but not so close that Bella would be able to see me.

"All good then," Bella gave me a smug look and I indulged her with a martyred sigh. Her gurgle of laughter at my supposed annoyance was worth the charade. She leaned forward to kiss the base of my throat, leaning forward and humming with pleasure when I wrapped my arms around her to hold her closer. We parted at last but I kept my arm around her waist as we set off towards the parking lot where Alice and Jasper would be waiting.

"How was work?" I asked in a mild voice.

"Great," Bella enthused. "It was really busy and they want me back tomorrow." Bella cocked her head at me as I frowned over her words. "What?"

"If it's about the money," I began in a careful tone.

"No, it's more than that," Bella shook her head. "It's about feeling useful. Knowing that there's something I can actually _do_ to help someone out instead of just feeling like a fragile little human."

"You're more than that," I remonstrated with a gentle smile.

Bella gave a noncommittal shrug at this, and I realised with an inward sigh that there was going to be more discussion about her working in the store. She was not going to accept our protection blindly, nor was she going to compromise any more than she felt was absolutely necessary. It was enough to make me wonder with a sense of rueful fondness if any legends mentioned the stubbornness of singers.

o * o * o * o

My gentle nudge met with resistance, as was to be expected. I tried again, rubbing her upper arm as I watched her face. Bella lay curled on her side with her back flush against my chest, her hands fisting the blanket. It was the same every morning, and I wouldn't have changed it for the world.

"Bella," I whispered, dipping my head to kiss her neck. This time there was a hint of movement as my lips brushed against her skin, her skin rippled with goose bumps at the chill.

"Mmph," she grunted and shifted a little, the movement pushing her bottom against my hips in a way that had me sucking in a sharp breath. Even when she was asleep Bella was the most beguiling woman I had ever encountered. I stopped trying to wake her and settled back to let her wake up in her own sweet time. Her eyelashes fluttered and I knew it wouldn't be long.

When she began to stir in earnest I relaxed my grip on her and moved back a ways to give her room to move. I knew the ritual by now, even if it was one that Bella was completely unaware of. She would frown a little, and then shift to give a full body stretch before subsiding into a boneless coil. A lick of her lips and then she would turn, instinctively seeking me out before she had even begun to open her eyes.

Sure enough, seconds after she had shuddered out into a long stretch she rolled over, reaching for my shirt to pull herself closer. Wriggling and burrowing into my chest she gave a sleepy hum as she tucked her head beneath my chin.

"Good morning," I whispered as I pressed a kiss against her hair.

"Time izzit?"

"Time to get up," I replied, trying not to smile as she shook her head and held me tighter.

"Ten more minutes," she bargained.

I rubbed my hand over her back, following the line of her hip and down the back of her thigh. Arching into my touch Bella cooperated by hooking her leg over my hips to pull us closer still. I closed my eyes and lifted my head from the pillow in a bid to restore some self-control, but Bella was having none of it. Wrapping herself around me she licked and nibbled at my throat while I …

What was I doing?

I was torn between wanting to sink into her until the end of days, and wanting to move away from her clutches in case she got hurt. An exquisite torture to be sure, and all the more difficult when I managed to move further away despite her sigh of frustration.

Bella rolled onto her back and sighed again, pushing her hair off her face as she endeavoured to get her breathing back to normal.

"Never thought I'd be the one trying to lead _you_ astray," she ventured at last.

By now I was sitting on the edge of the bed, swallowing back venom again and again as I clenched my fists against my thighs. Bella shifted and squirmed on the bed until she was kneeling behind me, hooking her chin over my shoulder as she wrapped her arms around me.

"Sorry," she offered in a penitent whisper.

"I'm not," I shook my head. "Every moment with you is worth it."

"But the pain," Bella reached around to run a gentle fingertip down my throat.

I reached up to grasp her hand in mine and kissed her fingers. "Opportunity cost." I got to my feet and held out a hand to help her off the bed. "Come on, you need to get ready."

"Right, what day is it?"

"Thursday," I confirmed.

"I don't start work until nine, perhaps we could do something?" Bella got to her feet and only stumbled slightly against me before setting off towards the bathroom.

"We'll see," I smiled. "Alice wants to dress you today."

"Right," Bella paused and leaned her head against the bathroom door. "How bad is it going to be?"

"She's pleased with herself, but that's all I can get out of her," I offered as I began to lace up my boots.

Bella snorted at that and closed the bathroom door behind her. I made myself scarce before I could become too distracted by the fact that Bella was only a few feet away. Naked. It was her habit to invite me in to join her once the water was running, and it was becoming an invitation I was finding increasingly difficult to refuse.

o * o * o * o

"No way," Bella shook her head. Her tone was so firm that I found myself pausing outside the closed door and listening in. "No skirts, Alice. We've already gone over this."

"C'mon, at least just try it on," Alice said in a coaxing tone.

"Have you seen how white my legs are? I'd need a tan to be able to carry that off."

"Have you seen _mine_?" Alice retaliated. "Anyways, that's what leggings are for. Here."

All I could hear was rustling fabric and non-committal sighs and comments from Bella as she tugged and zipped.

"I love it." I could hear the smile in Alice's voice from where I stood.

"Seriously, what was wrong with my flannel shirt that I've got in my bag?"

"Nothing if you're a lumberjack. Now put this on with it while I find the shoes."

"No heels."

"But-,"

"_Alice_."

I grinned all the way downstairs. Esme looked up from the toaster when she saw me appear in the kitchen.

"How's it going upstairs?"

"If Alice wants a dress-up doll she's going to have to look further afield than Bella," I replied.

Esme gave a quiet laugh as she poured a glass of juice and set it onto the counter. The toast was next, and I watched as a bowl of cereal was poured.

"You're really enjoying this aren't you," I observed.

"I am," she gave a pleased nod. "It's like playing house." She paused and gave me a softer smile this time. "I know it won't last of course, but while she's human it's nice to have these little reminders."

The wistful tone of Esme's voice gave me pause. All around me there were reminders that Bella's days as a human were numbered by fair means or foul. It was an issue that I still struggled with, despite Bella's assurances to the contrary.

_Enough_.

Jasper had appeared in the room behind me and clapped a friendly hand on my shoulder. I relaxed and gave him a grateful nod as the mood in the room lightened. His timing was fortuitous as I could hear Alice and Bella approaching. I turned and leaned against the kitchen bench to wait for her.

Alice may have had to compromise but the finished product was still enchanting as far as I was concerned. Bella had kept the denim mini skirt but had added black leggings and an assortment of t-shirts and layers in a way displayed her womanly curves without making Bella feel too self-conscious. As strong-minded as Alice could be it seemed she had certainly met her match; there were no high heels to be seen. Instead, Bella was sporting her favourite Chucks, one of which she now lifted to rub the back of her calf. I raised my eyes to her face and saw her hesitating before my regard.

"You look great," I assured her as she paced towards me and stopped for a kiss.

"It was a struggle," Alice sighed as she appeared at Bella's side, "but you'll see my way is right in time."

"Sure," Bella laughed now, "how much time have you got?"

"All the time in the world," Alice said airily as she draped herself over Jasper where he sat at the table watching us all.

"We'll see about that," Bella stuck out her tongue, making Alice snort.

Bella made short work of breakfast, not noticing when Alice's gaze turned inward and she reached out blindly for Japer's hand. Somehow I managed to keep my expression neutral enough as we spilled out of the house and into the car as Esme called out a fond farewell.

"What did you see?" I asked Alice, keeping my voice low enough that Bella wouldn't hear it over the general noise of the four of us getting into the car.

Alice shot me a look and tightened her grip on Jasper's hand.

_Not much. Not enough_, she admitted at last. _He's taken someone else, but I don't think it's anyone Bella knows. _

She considered me for a moment and then gave a brief nod, which was barely enough time to brace myself for the barrage of images she projected. James was euphoric with the hunt but his motives were interlaced with centuries old cunning as he somehow managed to elude Alice's radar. One of the last things Alice had managed to glimpse was James' latest meal. I gave a soft hiss at the vision.

_Wait, look again,_ Alice soothed me as Jasper diverted Bella with questions about her plans for the day ahead.

I looked and immediately felt a surge of relief that was tempered with guilt. It wasn't Bella, but the resemblance was striking.

He was sending a message.

o * o * o * o

"Stop fussing, I'll be fine," Bella batted my hand away from the nape of her neck. She immediately softened her rejection by leaning into my chest and gazing up at me with her warm, brown eyes. "It's just for the afternoon, same as the rest of the week. I'll be finished in no time."

"Easy for you to say," I sighed as I cupped her face in my hands and then smoothed her hair off her face. "At least you'll have something to do."

"You could study," she suggested.

"Perfect recall," I said.

"Maybe work on your assignments," she tried again.

"Already done."

"Take Alice shopping?"

"Now you're just being cruel," I looked pained.

"What is it with guys and shopping?"

"Try standing outside a lingerie section countless times over the decades and then tell me how you feel," I mumbled.

"Maybe you'll feel better about that now you've got a vested interest in the outcome," Bella suggested, giving me a mischievous look.

Never had I been more grateful for the inability to blush.

"I don't want to leave you," I admitted.

"I think we've established that," Bella replied as she reached up and undid the top two buttons on my shirt so that she could press a kiss against my chest. "Things seem to be okay though. Maybe the baddies have decided to move on."

"Let's assume they haven't," I suggested.

Bella's head went up at that and she narrowed her eyes as she looked at me.

"Are you assuming or knowing?"

I hesitated, and it was enough for Bella's lips to tighten as she flattened her palms against my chest.

"He's still here?"

I nodded.

"How do you … Alice, has she seen something?"

"She's seen something, although we can't be sure what he has planned next."

"Well, he's obviously clever so he won't try anything out in the open." She looked over her shoulder at the bookstore and then gave me a brave smile. "I've got to go to work."

"You don't have to," I said quickly.

"The last four days have been fine, I'll be okay," she nodded, although now I couldn't tell who she was reassuring. "Now kiss me quick before I change my mind."

Easy enough to say but once we were engrossed with each other, disengaging became that bit harder. I allowed my lips to part for the barest fraction as Bella lapped against the seam of my mouth, and felt my body's immediate response as her tongue dipped inside. I stopped and rested my forehead against hers.

"It's never enough," Bella admitted as she pressed another kiss to my lips before giving me a regretful smile. "Does it ever stop? The wanting?"

"Never," I shook my head with a wry smile.

"I think I like that," Bella's cheeks were flushed and she rushed her lips against mine for a final kiss before gripping the strap of her purse and turning towards the store. "I'll see you later this afternoon."

"I'll be waiting," I called after her.

"I like the sound of that too," she answered back.

A blushing wink over her shoulder at me and then she was gone.

o * o * o * o

I lingered outside the store for an hour after Bella had left, sitting and slouching in a variety of different locations so my presence wasn't too obvious. I endured the occasional hopeful thought from female passers-by but for the most part the surroundings seemed innocuous enough. Once I had reassured myself that there seemed to be no immediate threats I got up and made my way across campus to where I knew the others would be.

"Still looking," Alice advised as I approached where she and Jasper were sitting in the afternoon shade. "How about you, any luck?"

"None," I grunted as I pulled out a chair and straddled it. "You?"

"Flickers at best," Alice pulled a face, "but nothing solid. He's changing his mind and second-guessing himself all the time. All I know is that he's still in the area."

"Can you tell where?"

"No," Alice was unhappy, "but his latest meal will be on the news tonight."

The three of us sat in sombre quiet as we considered this.

"He's getting sloppy," I said at last.

"He knows we're still here, it's his way of sending a message," Jasper corrected.

"By drawing that sort of attention?" Alice frowned. "Even nomads know that discovery is forbidden."

"It doesn't matter to him, this is all a game. We're the best diversion he's had in decades. The bodies will start to pile up but as far as he's concerned they're just collateral damage."

"Two campers, then Lauren," Alice ticked them off on her fingers, "and now another one. The first two were accepted as an animal attack but not anymore." Her gaze shifted and she frowned again. Jasper reached out to rub her back in a soothing gesture as her mood spiked.

"Will there be others?"

"Maybe," Alice hesitated, "but there's something else you need to know."

That got my and Jasper's attention.

"The latest one was chosen because she looked like Bella. He's going to establish a pattern for them to follow, and if all roads lead to Bella then-,"

"All roads will lead to us," I finished for her.

Jasper was silent as he sat formulating strategies for both attack and defence.

"Edward, I don't think we can wait for the fight to come to us."

I sighed at his words and rubbed my forehead with a weary hand. What I wouldn't give to be able to lose myself in sleep for a few hours. The ability to withdraw from the world had never seemed more precious. Jasper had a point, and I knew that Emmett was chaffing for action.

"I know we'll be okay in a fight but Bella's so vulnerable," I said at last.

"Not _that_ vulnerable," Alice chided. I looked up to see her shaking her head at me. "Still, we could always split up, Jasper and I could take her somewhere safe and you could track James."

"I can't leave her," I admitted. "Not any more. Not ever."

_And they said the Age of Wonder had passed,_ Jasper's mental voice was droll and I wasn't able to entirely suppress my exasperated snort.

Alice was about to laugh when her head snapped up. Her face was blank as she stared straight ahead.

"Alice, what-," I began and then gave a grunt of pain as her hand shot out to grab my own.

"Sweetheart," Jasper remonstrated, "c'mon back."

She had my full attention now; enough for me to ignore that she was crushing my hand.

"Show me," I ordered, slapping my other hand on top of hers.

Alice gave a jerky nod and dropped her shields as Jasper watched us with concern.

_Bella rounding an aisle in the bookstore and stopping short when she realised she had nearly collided with the person who had been waiting for her. He had reached out to grasp her upper arms with a grip that brought a wince to her face. She had remonstrated with a teasing smile that had faded when she looked up and saw his face._

How foolish we had been. We had thought we would see James approach, but had not even considered that he would already be waiting for us.

He was in the store. I stood up so quickly that my chair fell backwards with a clatter that drew attention. None of it mattered now. Eyes wild, I turned and stared in the direction of the bookstore. We were nearby but could only move at human speed.

"He's not going to … wait," Alice said brokenly as we began moving at a near-run.

Definitely getting attention now. Heads were turning to follow but I couldn't have cared less.

Bella. He was with Bella. He had _touched_ her.

_Mine._

It was only when Alice whimpered that I realised I was still clutching her hand in mind as we broke into a jog. I relaxed my grip a fraction of a second before Jasper slapped my hand away so that he could pull Alice towards him. My protective instincts were broadcasting at full strength and Jasper had been taken by surprise. As we passed people I was dimly aware of people drawing closer to each other; their hands reaching for reassurance from a nameless fear that wasn't their own.

"What else?" I snarled at Alice.

"He … I can't …," Alice stuttered as she tried to keep up with the rapid decisions that were appearing and being discarded at a frenetic speed. "Edward, she's _gone_."

I said nothing but increased my pace. The sooner we got there, the sooner I could find out where she might be.

Only a couple of minutes had elapsed since Alice's warning but it had been enough. By the time we reached the front of the store the area was thick with the scent of conflicting scents.

Bella was gone. Her distinctive aroma eddied around me as I paced back and forth trying to follow it. Jasper stepped around me and went further into the store.

_Holy shit, his eyes …_

I looked sideways at the frightened mental voice. The woman nearby flinched away from my regard but not before I caught what she had seen. My eyes were black with the hunt and I was standing still. _Too_ still. With a monumental effort I took a deep breath and shook my head. Stuffing my hands into my pockets I made myself stroll down the nearest aisle as Alice followed in the direction that Jasper had gone. A careful circuit of the store later I had precious few clues to go on, but they were enough.

_His scent is saturated towards the back of the store. He must've gotten here ahead of Bella to wait for her._ Jasper supplied as he strolled towards me calling out a casual greeting for the benefit of other customers who were giving me suspicious looks.

I tasted the air, struggling not to growl Bella's scent in the air shifted and I could detect the sharp spike of adrenaline. I stood there tasting her fear and felt utterly helpless. Her scent consumed me and I stood shaking with anger until a wave of calm flowed over me. Jasper appeared at my elbow. He was doing all that he could but I was still radiating enough rage to have customers leaving our vicinity in a confused exodus.

Alice had approached the sales assistant at the counter and had struck up a conversation. It was only when she asked after Bella that they realised she had disappeared. Mild confusion entered their voices as Alice questioned them further. No, they hadn't noticed who she was talking to. No, they hadn't heard anything that sounded odd. I felt another growl begin in my throat at their useless ignorance.

"Focus," Jasper hissed at me, "there were others here."

I frowned at this and glanced at Jasper as he gripped my elbow and turned he a few degrees to my left. The scent hit me enough to make me cough under my breath. The thick musk was as disgusting as it had always been. Turning my head this way and that I followed the trail as Jasper circled around the store in the opposite direction. By the time we met up near the entrance where Alice was still talking we had more questions than answers.

The wolves had been on campus too, although their scent trails were so intermixed with that of James it was difficult to tell where one trail ended and the other began. The common scent between them was Bella but we had no way of knowing if she was with friend or foe. All I knew was that Bella was gone and there would be no peace until she was back with us again.

Alice turned and walked towards us, stopping to scoop up something that was lying on the floor flush against the base of one of the bookshelves. She cradled it gently in her hand as she walked to Jasper's side, and handed it over to me when I reached for it. I turned the slim casing over and over in my hands, handling it as carefully as I would a dandelion.

Bella was gone as far as we knew she had no way of contacting us.

o * o * o * o

"Anything?" Esme looked up as we returned home from another scouting run. I shook my head and watched her shoulders slump in disappointment.

"Faint traces here and there, but nothing fresh," Jasper clarified. "Any word from Em?"

"He and Rosalie are moving further out," Alice called in a distant voice. Jasper crossed to her side. Alice was participating in the conversation on a surface level, but her gaze was focussed inward.

Alice, Jasper and I had searched campus as comprehensively as we could. The scent trail had been muddied by time, and so the best we could determine was that they had taken her in a direction that led out of town. My mood was violent, and Jasper was exhausted from soothing everyone's emotions as the hours went on.

"Alice?" I spoke as gently as I could under the circumstances but she flinched all the same.

"Nothing," she shook her head. Had she been capable of tears she would have been crying by now. There were dark shadows under her eyes making her look even more exhausted. She needed to hunt, but no amount of cajoling from Jasper could make her leave the house. Raking her hands through her hair she gave a long shuddering sigh. Jasper took a seat beside her and put his arm around her, holding her close as she allowed herself to relax against him.

I wanted to hold Bella like that, and I would not stop until I could.

Carlisle had been notified at the hospital and was keeping a watch on all arrivals. We all knew it was a pointless gesture at best, but at this point in time we were exploiting every possible avenue we could. Wherever Bella was, human contact would be diluted by other beings.

I left the house and drove through town. After an hour I found I was concentrating on the densely populated areas, scanning as many minds as possible. I scoured any and every mind that I could access, hoping against hope that someone might have seen Bella. At first I had driven aimlessly and then with a muffled curse had taken a more systematic approach and embarked on a grid pattern search of the town.

Nothing.

I stopped the car and leaned forward to rest my forehead on the steering wheel as my despair overwhelmed me. The car idled smoothly and a distant part of my mind noted that Rosalie had tuned the engine.

Stronger together. Bella had kept reminding me that we were stronger together, and I had teasingly reminded her about that this morning. And now she was gone and I was falling apart. The family had rallied immediately but still we had nothing to go one. We need more; more information, more clues and more help.

More help.

My head snapped up as I realised there was one option that we hadn't yet explored, and just then my phone began to ring.

Alice agreed.

o * o * o * o

"I can't believe we didn't think of this sooner," Emmett muttered as he steered the off-road vehicle as high up into the mountains as he could. From there we would be on foot.

We had gone to the Quileute boundary and patrolled it for an hour. Normally any trace of our scent that was detected would mean an immediate retaliation. This time there was none. Wherever they were, it was not here.

"We've never been easy bedfellows," Carlisle commented. "Still, they love Bella too. Perhaps this will be a new era."

I didn't care what the hell we were heading into, as long as we got Bella back. It seemed that although the reservation was still patrolled there were key figures missing, and there had been enough information for me to discover some of them had gone to higher ground. Whoever was in charge, they were good. Those that were left behind had little knowledge of what the plans were, or the intended destination of what I now referred to as the Alpha group.

Leaving the vehicle we made our way up the mountain with caution. We had no way of knowing how many wolves would be in the area or how aggressive they would be on sight. The best we could hope for was that when we encountered each other the lines of communication would be open. They would be with us or against us, but as long as we had a common goal that was all that mattered.

**A/N: Nearly at the end folks … **


	22. Chapter 22

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight. _

**A/N: This is still very much in brain dump mode and is pretty much unbeta'd, but I wanted to post something as it has been so LONG in between updates. Thanks to Swimom7 for talking me off the ledge, as this nearly got dumped and rewritten last night.**

**Anyone still out there? Ah well, if there is at least I'm not talking to myself!**

**SLCh22**

"Anything?" Esme looked up as we returned home from another scouting run. I shook my head and watched her shoulders slump in disappointment.

"Faint traces here and there, but nothing fresh," Jasper clarified. "Any word from the others?"

"He and Rosalie are moving further out," Alice called in a distant voice. Jasper crossed to her side. Alice was participating in the conversation on a surface level, but her gaze was focussed ever inward.

I wasn't aware that I had been clenching my fists until Esme crossed the room to wrap an arm around my waist. I gave her a sidelong glance before returning my attention to Alice. My sister had barely moved over the last five hours. She had returned home from campus and curled up on one of the sofas, alternating between hugging a cushion or Jasper, whichever one appealed more at the time.

"She can't be gone," I muttered. "Not like this."

"We'll find her," Esme soothed.

"I know, they'll lead us to her," I nodded. "James isn't the type to take someone like Bella and then vanish. He'll want to gloat. He needs to make sure we can see that he's won."

"And has he?"

"Yes," I said simply as I looked first at Esme and then across at Alice and Jasper, "but only this round."

Jasper smile turned wolfish as my determination began to permeate the room.

"I was wondering when you were going to step up," he grinned, his teeth gleaming.

"I'm just getting started," I assured him.

"Are you sure that's who has her?" Esme frowned at this.

I hesitated for the barest instant. She had a point. The scents of James and the wolves had been intermingled at the rear of the store. Even with Jasper's advanced tracking skills we had only been able to follow them to the tree line at the edge of town before the breeze had dissipated the scent entirely.

"Whoever she's with, the others won't be far away," I admitted.

"All the more important that we get there first then," Jasper said.

He had a point. Disengaging myself from Esme with an apologetic smile I moved towards the door of the house. Jasper watched me with a narrowed gaze and then began to stand.

"No," I waved him back to his seat beside Alice. "I'll do this myself."

"You don't have to," he argued as he sat down, picking up on my determination.

"I know," I paused by the door and looked back at where my family sat watching me. Esme and Jasper both wore matching frowns of concern, but not Alice. She sat regarding me with quiet eyes that were at focussed on the present, and she looked satisfied.

"Go get our girl," she said in a quiet voice.

I nodded at her and then left the house. No more words were necessary. I went down the steps and paused in the front yard looking up at the night sky. The stars shone in their familiar constellations. There had been a time when I had resented their constancy, reminding me that I was alone in the dark, disappearing before the sun. Bella's appearance had blazing across my awareness like a comet and I had known then that nothing would ever be the same. Wherever she was, I hoped that she knew I wouldn't be far behind.

So.

Whoever had her would know I would be coming. They'd moving, trying to hide their scents as much as they could. Perhaps they'd be staying upwind. Turning my head this way and that I followed the breeze as it brushed across my face, checking its direction. The breeze was blowing from the north-west, leading up into the mountains. I turned to follow its source and ran.

o * o * o * o

I paused at the crest of another hill and stood surveying the landscape. The trees swayed in the wind but other than the occasional signs of animal passage there were no visible signs of life. Perhaps any other searcher would have given up by now or become overwhelmed with the scope of what they faced. Perhaps I could have succumbed as well if not for what I had found a moment ago.

Raising my hand again I studied what I carried pinched between thumb and forefinger and then sniffed them carefully. The hairs were unmistakably Bella's and I was ready to convince myself that they were still warm. It had been the familiar copper tang in the air that had drawn me to the area. There had been only the faintest trace of it but it had called to me like a clarion. I had stopped in my tracks, my tongue flickering out to taste the air and follow it to a nearby tree.

There.

A rusty smear against the tree bark and a few strands of hair had been all I could find, but it was enough.

Bella.

The blood was barely a few hours old but it told me what I needed to know. I knew who had her now.

I stood frowning in thought as I sifted through mental databanks, trying to pinpoint their destination. Whispered fireside stories, grudging admissions and stolen thoughts. I had them all, and they would lead me to her. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I retrieved the handset with a wry smile, knowing who it would be.

_See you there. A._

I made myself stand quietly as I curled the hairs around my index finger and then clenched my hand into a fist so that I wouldn't lose them. If they had hurt her they would pay.

_Mine._

o * o * o * o

I caught up with them four valleys away. Four long valleys of mountain and forest, but Bella's copper red traces blazed for me through the green. She was with the wolves; she had to be. It could have been the only situation where she felt safe enough to leave a blood trail.

The weather was beginning to turn again, the sky turning grey with clouds that promised rain if not snow in the next few days. Ordinarily it was of no consequence but this time I found myself looking up at the skies continually as I tracked. Bella hadn't been dressed for this type of weather. All she had set out to do was attend her classes, hand in her paper and then spend time with me. I frowned as I considered this. Alice had pressed her into taking a jacket but would she have been wearing it in the store? I hadn't stopped to look for it at the time. It hadn't seemed important but now it could make a big difference.

My stride faltered the breeze shifted slightly and the scent it carried hit me full in the face. It was a scent I was familiar with, but I had never experienced it in this level of concentration. Layer after layer of wolves, there had to be dozens of them, with a thick boundary marker of urine for good measure. It was all I could do not to gag as I instinctively recoiled from the fetid stench. That was their intention of course, and the fact that they had gone to such a concerted effort made me all the more certain they had what I sought.

The scent was a deterrent to be sure, but only if you had to breathe it in. I frowned in distaste as I carefully checked the air again and then paused my breathing and moved on, secure in my mission. I would find Bella, I would destroy anyone that even _thought_ about hurting her would not have the chance to live long enough to regret it. The smell of wolves was stronger now. I followed the boundary scent with agonising slowness, constantly moving to stay upwind. The sky was growing dark and I growled as I saw a flicker of orange through the trees. I'd found them.

I stood carefully surveying the scene, noting the landscape and planning my next move. Just as I expected, my phone began to vibrate in my pocket seconds later.

_On our way. Try not to do anything stupid. A._

My mind had been filled with the hunt, with the need to track down whoever had Bella. Now I was so close and all I could do was wait. Alice was right. All I wanted to do was charge into the fray, but it could well end up a suicidal gesture. It would certainly decimate the wolves' numbers before one of them got lucky and slowed me enough to get me to the ground. After that they would rip at my throat and tear me to pieces. It was something I accepted as fact simply because I knew it would do the same to them given half the chance.

I followed the line of the ridge, assessing the spot where I had seen the campfire. They must have been sure of themselves to light a fire, but given my surroundings were saturated with the stench of wolves I could only guess at their numbers. Another few sniffs and then I stood at what seemed to be the boundary line they had established and then crossed it without a moment's thought before launching myself into a nearby tree.

Crossing the intervening space towards the campfire through the tree canopy was a painstaking task. All I wanted to do was run roaring through the glade, knocking aside anyone and anything that stood in my way, but until I knew what state Bella was in I had to take my time. It was maddening.

As I got closer I began to pick out individual voices and thoughts. Interesting. The voices all seemed to meld and hum together like a kind of hive mind. They shared information amongst themselves; running updates on their boundary patrols, speculation about who might come, wondering if they would have the chance to kill a 'cold one' themselves. Buried amongst that was amused tolerance for the devotion one of them held for the woman they were now guarding.

Closing my eyes against the mental imagery did nothing to stop the influx of information. The way he behaved around her; standing closer than a friend would, the constant seemingly innocuous reasons to touch her, insisting they stay beside each other at all times. It was enough for the others to begin to speculate about the possibility of a mating imprint.

I wondered what Bella would have to say about that.

The boy – I couldn't think of him any other way – had taken care with their campsite. They were flush against a rocky outcrop in a position that would make it easy to defend if it came to that. Any attackers would have a long climb ahead of them if they chose to attack from the rear, and from where the camp was situated they would easily be able to spot anyone approaching.

As it was, I was concealed in the tree canopy over thirty feet away from where I could see Bella huddled by the fire with a steaming mug in her hands. There was nothing but open ground between us, and vampire speed aside there was still little chance for me to approach undetected. All I could do in the meantime was stay where I was to assess the situation.

And listen.

o * o * o * o

Bella looked mutinous. She cupped the mug in her hands gingerly and blew onto its contents, sending a cloud of steam into her face before she took a sip.

"There's going to be hell to pay when all this is over. You know that, right?"

"So long as you're still here, then that's a price I'm prepared to pay," Jacob countered in a calm down as he paced towards the fire to drop on some more wood. He stood watching the flames lick against the latest offering before sitting down on the rug beside Bella. He waited for a couple of heartbeats before carefully inching closer.

"I don't recall it being your decision to make," Bella countered. She took another sip and then to my immense satisfaction moved away from Jacob's side.

"It was," Jacob replied, frowning as he watched the space grow between himself and the woman at his side. _Why can't she just accept that I love-_

I choked back a growl, twitching as every muscle in my body screamed orders to launch myself towards them.

"When did _you_ appoint yourself judge and jury?" Bella gave him a weary look as she discarded her drink, setting the mug down at her feet.

"When Charlie asked us to look out for you," Jacob replied, his jaw set in stubborn lines.

Don't I get some sort of say in this? You know that the others will be looking for me."

"The others. You mean _them._" Jacob glared at her, a shiver running over his body as he brought himself back under control with considerable effort.

"They love me," Bella said slowly as she stretched her hands out towards the flames for warmth. "Of course they'll be looking after me to make sure I'm safe."

"We can do that."

"So can they," Bella replied in a serene tone.

"Right, and look what happened; one of _them_," somehow Jacob managed to make the word sound like a massive insult, "tried to get to you in public."

"That's no fault of the Cullens," Bella insisted. "I was the one that wanted to work in the store. If you're going to start pointing the finger of blame then you need to start with me."

"I find that hard to believe," Jacob scoffed. "If they're protecting you so much then why they could let you out of their sight is beyond me."

"How long have you known me?" Bella was getting exasperated now. "Do you really think I'm about to let someone swaddle me in bubble wrap and be happy about it?" She reached out swatted his upper hard, hard enough for it to sting her hand more than it hurt him. "Ow!"

"Probably should've warned you about that," Jacob smirked, watching as Bella rubbed her hand to relieve the sting.

"Whatever." Bella sighed and began picking at a loose thread on the blanket that was draped around her shoulders. "I just want to go home."

"Without Charlie where's home for you now?" Jacob pressed. _With me. Say you want to stay with me._

"Not here," Bella looked up briefly and then returned her attention to the blanket hem to avoid the sudden look of hurt that flashed across his face before he could school his expression. "And Forks isn't home anymore for me either."

"So where can you?"

"With them," Bella said simply.

"I don't agree. You need to be with your own kind," Jacob pleaded.

"If that's the argument you're putting forward then you've just had to drop out of the running."

Jacob looked stunned for a moment before his expression hardened.

"Jacob," Bella gave a sad smile. "I know you can't tell me, but I was at the tribal meeting for a reason wasn't I? All those legends told me what you're not able to."

The silence between them was broken only by a large piece of wood in the fire collapsing into embers. Bella looked away from Jacob's hurt expression to watch sparks from the fire whirl up into the night sky. They could have been statues but for Bella's hair fluttering around her face and the clenching and unclenching of Jacob's fists.

"You should still be your own kind," he went on doggedly.

"And what kind is that?" Bella sighed and sank back down onto the log. "I've gotta say Jacob for all your legends and prejudice the Cullens have been far more honest with me in all of this." Bella was rubbing her palms on her knees as she spoke and so didn't see Jacob's expression blanch.

"I wanted to. God, Bella, I wanted to tell you every single day."

"But you didn't," Bella replied evenly. "I'm not saying you didn't try," she went on when Jacob opened his mouth to protest. "Please try to understand that I love them."

"No," the word was a snarl as Jacob began to tremble. "We're your family. Charlie asked Sam to watch over you when you came here to study. He always said that we were your family if anything were to happen."

"Something has happened," Bella agreed, "more than Charlie or I could have ever imagined." She scrubbed at her face with her hands, pushing her hair off her face and staring into the fire for a long time.

"Bells," Jacob whispered, his expression anguished when she looked away from his plea for understanding.

"Don't make me chose because it'll be him. " Bella shook her head. "It'll always be him."

The breeze curled around my shoulders again and I absently shifted to follow it., but this time I was distracted as I calculated strategies. I saw movement in the forest before it stilled and a muzzle pointed to the sky to give a series of quick barks to his brothers nearby. I could have moved faster to say downwind, but I hadn't. Now they knew I was here and I was glad of it. I straightened up from where I had been crouching on the branch and regarded the figures in the clearing.

"What's that?" Bella had responded to the sounds the others were making.

"Someone's here," Jacob replied in a flat voice. _Cullen._

"About time," Bella muttered under her breath as she got to her feet. The blanket slid from her shoulders and puddle at her feet. "Edward," she called out in a clear voice.

I raised an eyebrow at her confident tone.

"It might not be him," Jacob said in a sullen tone as he moved to stand as if to shield her from unseen foes.

"Oh for fu-," Bella checked herself and then gave him an ineffectual shove. "_Move_ Jake. I've had enough of this bullshit." When her shoving failed she took a step backwards, almost tripping over the log she had been sitting on earlier before saving herself with a flailing of arms and another muffled curse.

"That's my Bella, always the klutz," Jacob chuckled as he turned to make sure she was okay.

"I'm not your Bella, and I'm only a klutz when things get in my way," Bella retorted as she jerked herself out of Jacob's reach. Moving away she took a few steps away from the clearing and squinted into the near dark. "Edward?"

"It could be the others," Jacob cautioned.

"It's him," Bella replied, not taking her attention away from her scan of the forest.

"How can you tell?" _Impossible. The scent markers are him for sure but _how_ can she possibly know?_

"The pack sound different, those calls were about recognition instead of a hunt," Bella replied.

I blinked. Perhaps Carlisle's theories were more accurate than we had all realised.

"You don't have to go with him," Jacob reached for Bella again but she stopped him with a look. "We did what we thought was best."

"Oh really. Hauling me off campus and into the forest with no way for me to let my friends know I was okay, no warm clothing and a handful of camping supplies. Yeah, real good."

"The others were going to bring supplies," Jacob tried to explain.

"Uh-huh, like my phone? Do you have any idea how worried my friends will be? Angela must be worried sick, not to mention the store. Hell, by now they've probably called the authorities." Bella sagged a little at this. "Jacob, I just want to get out of here."

Even though they only stood a few feet apart Bella now seemed further away from Jacob than ever. I could see this, but apparently he couldn't.

"This could be home," Jacob began and then went on when Bella gave him a wry smile. "Not here," he gestured at the makeshift camp, "back at the Res. With me."

"Maybe once it could have been," Bella agreed, "but not anymore. Not now."

"I don't get it Bells, how has he blinded you so much? People are dying and yet you still want to run back to him. Why you'd want such a cold-blooded-,"

"Enough," Bella's voice was sharp. "I've heard enough, there's nothing you can say that will change my mind. I want to go _home_. How many more times do I have to say it?"

They stared at each other, seemingly at an impasse until Jacob's shoulders slumped in apparent defeat. He ran a hand through his hair and took a careful step towards her.

"Fine," he said in a weary voice. "But if you won't listen maybe you'll pay some attention if I show you. Seems I've got nothing to lose anyway."

Bella frowned as he stepped closer still and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Wha-," she began to say before Jacob stopped her with a kiss.

I was about to launch myself from where I stood when I registered Bella's reaction. Jacob was clutching her to him as he tried to take the kiss deeper. His thoughts were exultant that at last he had her where he wanted her. What he failed to register though was Bella's response. She had struggled at first and then made herself go limp and passive.

The branch I was clutching turned to dust in my hands.

Jacob stepped back and took a deep breath, rubbing his thumbs on her upper arms where he held her in what he thought was a comforting grasp. Bella blinked at him slowly once, twice and then gave him a fleeting smile as she shook her head.

"Bells?" Jacob ducked his head to look her in the eye, and so was perfectly lined up for her right hook when she pulled back her arm and punched him as hard as she could. Her fist met his jaw with a sickening crunch of bone and I was one the ground and running towards her before the fact could register.

"Bella!" I wrapped my arms around her and stepped back, effectively dragging her away from Jacob as he reached towards her.

"Shit," Bella whispered. "_Ow_." Her face was white with pain.

Jacob was watching Bella with a combination of shock and bemusement. _She hit me, can't believe she hit me where did he come from bloodsucker just a few more minutes and she would've-_

"Enough," I spat, ready to kill him where he stood. His mental babble became a muffled roar as he called to the pack. I heard them respond and their calls grew louder as they approached. We didn't have much time.

Bella shivered in a combination of shock and pain as she moved closer in my embrace. Tucking her ace beneath my chin, her warm breath feathered against my skin. The forest around us erupted as the wolf pack charged to where we stood. Jacob stepped back a pace and stood watching us, shivering as he tried to control his change. The wolves stopped a few feet away, pacing back and forth in a restless semi-circle. Pivoting slightly I tried to turn Bella towards the campfire where she would at least have her back to the rock face. I was confident the wolves would not hurt her, but I knew that I was another matter entirely.

"You can save yourself a world of pain and just leave now," Jacob suggested.

"Funny, I was about to say the same to you," I countered offering up a mirthless grin.

Jacob's expression twisted and the growls around us increased in volume.

"Enough posturing," Bella managed, which got our attention. She swayed slightly where she stood cradling her broken hand protectively to her chest. Looking at each of us in turn she walked to my side, reaching out with her good hand to take my own, aligning herself and facing the pack in silent challenge. "I don't care what you thought you were doing for my own good, but you need to listen to me now. You're going to let us go, and I don't want to hear another word about it."

"But-," Jacob began to protest.

"_Not_ another word." This time Bella was the one growling.

I took my attention off Jacob in time to see one of the wolves cock his head in puzzlement at the fierceness in Bella's voice. It seemed she had everyone's attention. Now she looked at the other wolves in turn.

"You're all going to let us go."

A wolf snorted at this and one of the younger ones gave a soft, anxious whine.

"Bella," I whispered.

"You really think I'm going to let you go with him?" Jacob was trembling harder now.

_Edward._ I looked up at the call and gave a quiet smile.

"You're going to let us go with them," I replied for the both of us, nodding toward the tree line as Jasper and Emmett stepped out and into view. Their appearance ratcheted up the tension amongst the pack and yet I felt Bella sigh with quiet relief.

"Edward," her voice sounded strained, "get me out of here."

"Gladly," I scooped her up into my arms and walked towards my family.

"Bella," Jacob called after us. I wanted to keep walking but a careful nudge from Bella had me pausing and turning with considerable reluctance. "I wanted to keep you safe from them. From him."

He meant both of us: James and I.

"I know," Bella nodded, "but it's my life and I get a say in things too." She rested her head on my shoulder as if exhausted from the simple conversation, and so I turned without another word and walked away.

Jasper and Emmett both stood tense as they watched me approach.

"Are they going to try anything?" Jasper jerked his chin towards the pack that had started to follow us at a careful distance.

"Think of them as an honour guard," I muttered as I reached them.

"Some guard," Bella said under her breath. I was walking as carefully as I could so that she wasn't jostled any further.

"What's wrong with your hand?" Emmett leaned towards Bella but made no move to inspect her. No doubt he could tell that I wouldn't tolerate anyone else touching her but myself until I got her home to Carlisle.

"Broke it," she said succinctly, "and believe me when I say it hurts like a motherfu-,"

"She punched Jacob," I broke in over the top of her. Bloodlust notwithstanding, my prim and proper values could still assert themselves when the occasion called for it.

Emmett looked impressed. "You punched the wolf?"

"He wasn't a wolf at the time," Bella explained, somehow contriving to curl further into my chest in a curious mixture of pride and embarrassment.

"Go girl," Emmett whistled. _If she's that fiery now she's gonna make one hell of a newborn._

"Can we please get out of here?" Jasper asked in a plaintive tone that trembled under his emotional strain. I looked at his pinched expression and nodded once. The combination of my protectiveness, Jacob's thwarted lust and the pack's rage he needed to get away from there as quickly as possible.

"Rosalie and Alice are further back checking the trail," Emmett explained as we broke into a careful run.

"I know, she's given the all-clear," I replied. "Are you okay?" I asked Bella who had given a quiet groan at the increased movement.

"Nothing a boatload of ibuprofen or a good scotch can't fix," Bella said. "Take me home."

"Gladly," I replied and increased my speed.

o * o * o * o

Bella had said very little on the way out of the forest. Alice had peppered me with directions until we had made our way through two valleys to where Alice and Rosalie were waiting for us with the car. As soon as we were away from the wolves Alice had been able to track our progress and act accordingly. Carlisle had already been informed and was waiting for us at the hospital.

"You've really made a habit of this over the years," Carlisle commented as he inspected the cast that had been fitted to Bella's wrist.

"Not for much longer," Bella replied after a brief pause. She blinked up at me slowly before returning her attention to Carlisle's job at hand. Carlisle's relief at seeing Bella safe combined with his distress at seeing her in considerable pain had made him a little more generous with the painkillers than usual.

"You've made up your mind then," he murmured as his gaze flicked sideways to where I stood beside Bella's char.

"You think _I_ had any say in it?" I asked. It was true. No matter how many arguments I had presented Bella had countered every one of them.

"You realise I'm still in the room, right?" Bella said, wincing and rolling her shoulder to try and release some of the stiffness in the joint when Carlisle released her.

"Always," I looked down at her and smiled as I ran my hand up her arm to cup the nape of her neck. "Let's get you home for some rest."

"I like the sound of that," Bella sighed. Her eyes were growing heavy and she allowed me to pick her up in my arms without any protest; a sure sign that she wasn't feeling 100%.

Carlisle accompanied me to the exit, exchanging pleasantries and reassurances about Bella's wellbeing from various hospital workers that had seen me arrive with her. It seemed on this occasion the girlfriend was getting nearly as much as attention as the son, even if their sympathy was a means to an end as their questions made me slow down enough to smile and respond.

"Leave the poor nurses alone," Bella nuzzled at my neck, "dazzling all those people isn't playing fair."

"They started it," I said in an undertone, and if I had to duck my head to rub my head against her hair as I spoke then that was a bonus.

"Whatever, just take me home to bed," Bella shifted in my arms and grimaced at the cast.

"As you wish."

Esme and Alice been all fluttering concern and reassurance as soon as we had arrived home from the hospital. Bella had wanted to clean up first but Esme had insisted on feeding her. Too her credit, Bella had stood her ground but had succumbed to a hot chocolate while Alice arranged a plastic bag to keep the cast dry in the shower. Even Rosalie had stood at a discrete distance – the wolf stench was all the more oppressive indoors – and offered to help.

The level of female concern in the house was too much for Emmett, who had simply removed himself from the situation on the pretext of patrolling the house. For all that the mood was loving, Jasper had removed himself from the house in a gesture of solidarity with his brother.

"You're not coming?" Emmett had paused at the doorway.

"Can't," I shrugged.

"Won't," Jasper corrected with a gentle smile.

I had offered nothing more than a nod before returning my gaze to the trio of women in the couch. Bella had nearly finished her warm drink and was showing distinct signs of wear.

_She's had another painkiller, Edward. I give her an hour before she falls asleep._

"All done?" Esme took the empty cup. "Perhaps now you're ready to have a shower and get some sleep."

"Sounds wonderful," Bella sighed.

"Good. You smell terrible," Rosalie observed from the other sofa where she had been skimming through a magazine.

Bella had flushed a deep red at this.

"Rose," Esme began in a censoring tone.

"No, she's right," Bella waved Esme off with her good hand. "The sooner I'm cleaned up the better." She stood up with only a slight wobble and gave a self-conscious laugh. "I'm just not sure how I'll manage it."

"I'll help," Alice bounced to her feet and started to herd Bella towards the stairs. "We'll have you freshened up in no time."

A short while later I was standing at my bedroom window gazing outside, trying not to listen to the noises emanating from the bathroom. Muffled curses flavoured with considerable embarrassment on Bella's part set the tone for the first few minutes. Thankfully Alice's unflappable demeanour and a few judicious comments improved Bella's mood.

"You think this is bad?" Alice was saying now as she turned off the shower. "Edward's in the next room trying to think clean, wholesome thoughts and you're in here nekkid."

"Butt nekkid," Bella agreed, her voice burred with fatigue.

"Uh-uh," Alice paused, obviously picking up on Bella's possible futures. "You hold that line of thought right there, missy. You're doped up to the eyeballs with a broken hand, and he's … well, he's Edward."

"You're no fun."

Even through closed doors I could 'see' Bella's pout.

_Nearly done in here Edward. I know you'll behave yourself, but I can't say the same for our girl here. She's kinda fun when she's buzzed._

The rustling of towels and clothing was interminable but at last the two women appeared, Alice escorting Bella as she was incapable of walking unaided.

"Relax Alice, I think I've got it from here," Bella reassured her. She was still pale, and I found myself missing the flush of colour that often stained her cheeks when we were in my room.

"Then I'll leave you to it," Alice gave me a significant look and then left the room.

"Am I missing something?" Bella asked after a moment's pause.

"Not at all," I assured her.

"Right," Bella gave a dubious nod and then stood apparently deep in thought.

"What's wrong?" I paced towards her and guided her to the bed.

"I'm forgetting something. Everything's fuzzy," Bella admitted.

"Bound to be, Carlisle's got you on some strong medication." Unable to help myself I reached up to smooth her hair off her forehead. Bella gave a sleepy hum and leaned into my touch before she gave a violent start.

"The store!"

"Alice has already called," I explained, encouraging her to get into bed. She unthinkingly put some pressure on her wrist as she made to crawl across the mattress, pulling back with a quiet hiss.

"What did she tell them?" Bella allowed me to help her into bed, and I took my time arranging the pillows around her just so before I spoke.

"She said there had been a family emergency, that there hadn't been time for you to let them know."

"I suppose technically you weren't lying," Bella grunted as she made herself comfortable.

"They were relieved to hear that you were alright." I sat beside her on the bed stroked her hair, raising my arm when she pushed at me until she could curl up against my side.

"I'll go see them tomorrow," Bella settled her heavy wrist and nuzzled against my neck with a yawn.

The room was silent for a long moment.

"Okay, spill," Bella said eventually.

"What?"

"I can't read your mind, but I can practically hear the thoughts turning over. What's wrong?" Bella yawned again. It was clear she was exhausted but she wasn't going to settle until she had her answers.

"James," I admitted. "Emmett thinks we should go on the offensive, kill him before he can get to us again. Jasper thinks so too."

"And you? What do you think?"

"I don't know," I admitted, "but you won't be safe until he's gone. I know that much."

"Perhaps once I'm changed he'll back off," Bella mused. She was drawing on my shirtfront with drowsy fingers.

"Perhaps," I agreed, and then blinked at the easy way with which she had said it. "There's no going back for you is there?"

"Nope," Bella propped her chin on my chest and blinked at me slowly. "How about you?"

"I'm getting there," I assured her, willing myself to stay still as Bella wriggled against me and insinuated ne of her legs between my own. It seemed to be a habit of hers; to twine herself around me as much as she could before going to sleep. It seemed that having lost me once she had no intentions of letting me go again.

"So you'll do it?" Bella's eyelids were drooping more now. The longer she stayed in contact with me the quicker she lost the heat from her hot shower. I pulled the coverlet up over her shoulders and tried to tuck it between us to protect her from my lukewarm body.

"Yes," the admission was soft but Bella's answering smile made it worthwhile, "but not for the reason you think."

"How many reasons are there?" Bella ducked her head to smother a yawn against my shirt.

"Two," I replied as I lifted a hand to card my fingers through her hair.

"Will you tell me what they are?"

"When the time is right, yes," I nodded. "You should sleep now."

"Soon," she agreed. The room was silent for a few more heartbeats and then Bella shifted again, wriggling until her face was level with my own. We stared at each other for a long moment before her head dipped lower for a kiss. The drugs in her system were slowing her down more now. "I just keep thinking there's something I've missed."

"There's plenty of time," I soothed, "get some rest."

Bella made a soft sound and kissed me again, open-mouthed and somewhat graceless in her inebriated state, but no less sweet.

"Plenty of time for you, I'm the one on the clock," Bella pointed out. Her hand paused on my chest long enough for me to think she had fallen asleep, before it twitched and started moving again.

I watched the pulse leaping on the side of her neck and considered her warmth. I couldn't imagine her any other way and yet these moments were numbered. It didn't have to be that way but the nomads had changed everything.

"You're thinking about him again," Bella observed. "Stop it."

"I can't help it."

"How long are you going to live looking over your shoulder? You've spent decades watching and worrying about what might have been or what you could've done better."

"It's different for us," I whispered, willing her to comprehend the magnitude of what she was prepared to undertake. "When you're a vampire the past doesn't just catch up with you. It can haunt you until the end of days."

"But no matter what your talents are you still can't stop time," Bella leaned forward to kiss me again, her lips warm against my own. "The world only spins forward."

My eyes closed as she nestled against me and subsided into sleep at last. I watched and envied as she retreated from the world for a few precious hours. She was right. The world would spin forward and soon she would be awake again, asserting her independence and terrifying lack of awareness about the type of threat James was posing to her existence.

In the meantime, all we could do was watch and wait.

It was only a matter of time before James made his move, and I could only hope that we would be ready.

**Writer's block is when your imaginary friends stop talking to you. It's been very quiet lately … sorry folks. The remaining chapters (maybe 2 left) have been mapped out, so it's back to business. Just give me about 2 weeks to write the next one. Deal?**


	23. Chapter 23

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight. As always, I just like playing 'what if'_

**SLCh23**

"Bella! Oh just look at you, what have you done to yourself?"

The relief in the bookstore was palpable as the women behind the counter had looked up to see Bella enter the bookstore. They quickly crossed to her to exchange hugs and reassurances. I stood to one side with a polite smile on my face, surreptitiously scenting the air to see if James had returned. There was perhaps the faintest trace but the trail was obviously old.

"I'm fine, it's just a break," Bella smiled away their concern. "I just wanted apologise for what happened the other day."

"You just up and disappeared! When your friends came looking and we couldn't find-," one of the woman broke off looking distressed. _She could've been taken, could've been killed and we didn't even see …_

"Thankfully she came home safe and sound," I commented with a careful smile. The woman's concern was strangely reassuring although her distinct lack of assistance at the time had been frustrating.

"Well, kinda," Bella hefted the cast with a wry smile. "I guess this will affect my hours here for a couple of days."

I shot her a sidelong glance at this. We had agreed that Bella would step back from her job at the store. I wanted her to withdraw from anything that would have her in public until the threat of James had been dealt with but of course Bella would fight that in her own inimitable way.

"Sure, we can re-work the roster. Keep us posted on when you'll be free and we'll work something out."

Their eyes kept flickering to where I stood behind and to the right of Bella, a silent watchful presence.

_Angela was right, he doesn't say much. Still, maybe conversation isn't everything._

"Thanks," Bella nodded. "Listen, can I just say again how sorry I am that-," Bella began but her apology was waved of. They stood chatting for a few more minutes until interrupted by customers approaching the register with purchases in hand. That was our cue to leave, and I automatically put my arm around Bella's shoulders when we let the store.

"Feel better?"

"Much," she nodded, "but still guilty for what happened. They were really worried about me."

"Why? It wasn't your fault," I replied. It was true. Bella had been going about her working day when Jacob and Sam had appeared on the scene and hustled her out of the store with no time for any explanations or even a backward glance. Bella had furiously demanded an explanation to a largely silent pack that had gone unanswered until they were well into the forest.

By the time Jacob began to offer what little information they had, Bella's temper had distilled into a single-minded determination to get home. I had to hide a smile when I heard this. I had known Bella for a comparatively short period of time compared to Jacob, but even I knew that there was no negotiating with her stubborn temper.

"So did you find anything interesting while the girls and I were talking?"

"Nothing new," I admitted. "James hasn't been back."

"Good," Bella said.

"To the store at least, but he's still in the area."

"Ah," Bella's optimism dimmed. "So now what?"

"Now I take you to class."

"Huh?"

"You've got class this morning, right?"

We set off across the campus green, Bella's arm around my waist and my arm around her shoulders. Although she had refused Carlisle's offer of a sling she walked with her injured wrist up against her chest

"Yeah, but it's not one of your subjects. Are you telling me that you're going to sit in on a class you don't need?" Bella was looking puzzled, although a smile was tugging at her lips as she began to realise the level of my protectiveness. "Are you going all bodyguard on me?"

"You're the one that wanted a normal routine, and look where that got you," I admonished.

"I'm never going to live that down am I?" Bella muttered as she glanced at her cast.

"Probably not," I agreed in a serene tone.

The crowds increased as we drew nearer to Bella's lecture and we were stopped numerous times so that people could say hello and exclaim over her injury. To my surprise I was included in the greetings as well. It seemed that my relationship with Bella gave me a certain level of entry into the social norms of campus, even if many of them didn't know what to make of me.

Once inside the lecture hall Bella sat down and huffed in quiet annoyance as she dug through her bag to retrieve a notebook and pen.

"You don't have to take notes, I can write you some after class," I suggested.

"Do you think I'll have perfect recall once I'm changed?" Bella asked carelessly as she stowed her notebook back in her bag. The ease with which she asked the question took my breath away.

"Highly likely," I replied.

"It must be good, having all that information at a moment's notice," Bella observed.

"At times, yes."

"And sometimes not?"

"Perfect recall doesn't mean perfect moments," I admitted after a long pause. I reached out to gently trace the vein in Bella's wrist. "The look on your face when I deliberately hurt you and left you alone in the forest that afternoon is one that will haunt me forever."

"But you came back," Bella pointed out in a gentle voice. "We're together now."

I looked up from her wrist to regard her as she sat beside me. The lecture hall was dim in preparation for a presentation, but to me Bella glowed with vitality. The overhead light picked out the auburn highlights in her hair and her breath made the dust motes in the air jump and dance around her like a halo. I felt the sudden need for her to understand.

"If I ever leave your side again I won't go willingly." The words sounded like vow, which I suppose they were.

"You think it's any different for me?"

I gazed at Bella's warm brown regard.

"No, I suppose it isn't."

Bella smiled at my admission and made as if to reach up and touch my face, stopping with a slight wince.

"Problem?"

"This thing is making me feel even clumsier than usual, I hate it," Bella admitted.

I frowned at this, wondering if her discomfort with the cast was symptomatic of the larger situation.

"You don't like feeling confined," I ventured at last.

"Talk to Angela about the summer I had a broken leg. I was unbearable," Bella snorted.

A wave of sadness swept over me at her words. Bella casually made comments about her human life, seemingly unaware those moments would become a distant memory. Confinement would become her new existence until she could get her newborn thirst under control. If she was chaffing at a cast on her wrist now, I doubted she would look at me with love in her eyes when we had to sequester her from the world for her own safety.

I was about to respond when a faint beep came from Bella's bag. She twisted in her seat to retrieve her phone.

"Huh," she sighed as she looked at the screen.

"Problem?"

"Angela wants to catch up," Bella replied as she tapped the handset against her chin as she considered the message. "Good to see that she's finally embracing the technological age."

I raised an eyebrow at this.

"She hates abbreviated text-speak with a passion, so she usually calls and leaves a voicemail instead." Bella looked at the screen and gave a sad little smile. "She's freaked out from my vanishing act and wants to catch up soon."

"She's a good friend," I observed, "she has a good heart."

"You noticed, huh?" Bella nudged me with her shoulder as she laboriously typed out a response.

"Beyond the obvious," I conceded with a droll smile of my own. "Her thoughts are always kind, which makes a refreshing change."

"Unlike mine at times." This time Bella's smile was impish. "It's probably a good thing you couldn't read my mind when Jacob had me."

"Didn't have to, your body language was screaming at me," I slouched down in my seat as Bella gave a small sound of amusement. "I should probably be thankful that you couldn't read _mine_."

"Impure thoughts, huh?"

"Something like that," I grunted. "Homicidal might be another word for it too."

Bella managed to turn her gurgle of laughter into a discrete cough as the lecturer began to speak.

o * o * o * o * o

"Someone wants a word with you," I sighed. Emmett had sent me a text message during the lecture advising that he had picked up a familiar trail.

"Huh? Where?" Bella glanced around and then back up at me in puzzlement. We had only just exited the lecture hall when I had caught the distinctive scent on the wind. By the time we had crossed campus towards the library I had a bead on exactly who it was and where they were most likely waiting.

"The boy. Jacob," I clarified. "He's waiting for us in the parking lot."

Bella's expression shifted from curiosity to surprise and then resignation. "I guess I can hear him out before I catch up with Angela."

When we reached the parking lot it was starting to empty out for the afternoon. Amongst the comings and goings of cars we could see Jacob standing beside my Volvo. Although his face had lit up with a smile of relief when he saw Bella, his expression hardened when he saw I was with her.

"You go talk to him, I'll wait."

Bella hesitated and shot me a look of amusement.

"Homicidal thoughts again?"

"I'll be right here," I repeated, not wishing to acknowledge that her teasing had been a little too close for comfort.

I watched as Bella approached Jacob, hiding my smile when she took a step back from his proffered hug of greeting. My phone began to ring and I dug it out of my pocket to answer it, turning to scan the parking lot as I spoke.

"Alice."

"Edward, where's Bella?" Alice sounded anxious.

"With me of course, why?" I turned to see Bella leaning against my car, her arms folded across her chest as Jacob spoke. As if sense my gaze she looked across at me and offered a brief smile.

"I can't see her, she just vanished."

"Alice I'm looking at her right now."

"Who else is there?"

"The dog," I answered, wondering if Jacob would be able to hear me. The scowl he shot in my direction gave me my answer.

"We've got to keep Bella away from him," Alice stated, the words almost sounding like a hiss. "I can't see her when she's with them."

"Interesting," I ventured. I gave Bella and Jacob another glance and then turned my attention to the dissipating crowds on campus. James could be anywhere.

"_Interesting?_" Alice's voice went up half an octave and I could hear Jasper making soothing noises in the background. "I've just told you that we've discovered a flaw in my abilities and that's all you can say?"

"It's another factor to consider, but I'm more concerned with finding James."

"Whatever," she huffed. "Just … don't take your eyes off her, and get her away from Jacob."

"That's a given," I replied. Bella looked across at me and then made a show of looking at her watch and making her apologies to a reluctant Jacob. That was my cue. I strolled back to where she stood and managed to repress a smug grin when she slipped an arm around my waist.

"Leech," Jacob muttered.

"Pup," I nodded, watching him wince as my barb struck home. Two could play at that game.

"C'mon guys," Bella sighed. "Enough with the pissing contest."

"You sure you want to stay with him?" Jacob asked as if unable to help himself.

"Yup," Bella declared, looking entirely unrepentant even as Jacob looked dismayed at the speed of her response. "That's something you could've found out back at the store instead of doing your grab and run routine."

"It kept you alive," Jacob muttered.

I had to admit he had a point. Even though James hadn't been in the store when they had taken her, he had clearly been spending time there. Perhaps he had been acquainting himself with Bella's familiar haunts, or planning to lay in wait at a future date. According to Bella's account of the situation when I had gotten her home, Jacob and Sam had picked up on the vampire scent and reacted accordingly. No matter how much I disliked the wolf pack, they had served an admirable purpose that day. Unfortunately for Jacob, they had mishandled their communication of it to Bella and now their relationship was deteriorating as I watched.

I gave an inward sigh at this. There was no way of knowing if the enmity between us could ever be resolved but perhaps a strategic alliance against a common enemy could be negotiated if and when the need arose.

Jacob was tripping over himself with clumsy apologies and resentful questions as Bella refused to give in to his wishes and return to the Reservation. It was time to wrap up the conversation.

"What time did you say you were going to meet Angela?" I ventured, my modulated tone a direct contrast to the snarl that was building up in Jacob's voice.

Bella blinked and picked up on the exit I had provided.

"I'll give her a call and let her know we're on our way," Bella flashed me a brilliant smile before she got out her phone and began to dial. "See you later, Jake."

"Bells-," Jacob began and then stopped as Bella put her phone to her ear. I was surprised to feel a momentary pang of sympathy for the pup. They were both as stubborn as each other. Jacob looked at me with a clenched jaw, obviously trying to collect himself before he spoke in a low voice. "I don't care what Bella thinks you are. I won't stop looking out for her."

"That makes two of us," I replied in an equally grim tone.

Jacob matched me glare for glare until he finally shook his head and marched off to a nearby motorcycle. He got on and revved it furiously before wheeling it around and speeding away. I stood watching him go before Bella's low sound of distress got my immediate attention.

"Oh honey," Bella was saying, "I'm so sorry, what can I … of course," Bella was already reaching for me as I crossed to her side. "Of course I'll be right there. Do you need anything?" This time her smile was sad. "Done. I'll get some on my way." She closed her phone and sighed. "Angela and Ben just broke up."

"What?" I was surprised at this; they had seemed entirely enamoured of each other.

"Ben dumped her this afternoon. Angela said he sounded really weird and wouldn't tell her why. She's at home alone, Edward." Bella looked up at me as if willing me to understand. "I've got to be there for her tonight."

"Of course," I nodded as we began to walk towards my car.

"With ice-cream," Bella added.

"Right," I said, a little less certainly this time. Clearly this was a female twenty-first century social development I was unfamiliar with.

o * o * o * o * o

"He didn't say why?"

"No, he just sounded so …," Angela's voice trailed off into an incoherent sound as she blew her nose again.

"Angela I'm so sorry," Bella's voice was rough with exhaustion and empathy. "I don't understand it either."

Sitting in the next room on Bella's bed I sighed and leaned forward, my elbows on my knees as I studied the thread count on the floor rug. I had mild aspirations of spending an evening at home with Bella, although this recent development had delivered an entirely different result.

It was a few hours and a pint of Baskin Robbins before Bella finally slipped into her bedroom. She closed the door and leaned against it for a moment before offering me a tired smile. I sat up and opened my arms, and she crossed the room and sank onto my lap with a quiet sigh.

"I can't stay long," she whispered.

"Why?" I kissed her hair and gathered her closer with a quiet hum.

"Angela's still upset so I told her I'd sleep in her room tonight."

"Right," I nodded. If I succeeded in keeping the disappointed sigh out of my voice Bella was a spectacular failure. I eased myself over the windowsill to wait outside while she changed, trying to think unexciting thoughts as I listened to the rustle of cotton over her bare skin. The door opened and closed, and by the time I reappeared in the room I could hear Bella next door. Sitting on the bed once more, I resigned myself to an uneventful night.

o * o * o * o * o

I was standing by the window watching the sky change colour when Bella appeared in the early hours of the morning.

"Hey," she greeted, her voice rough with sleep. She got into her own bed with a groan and patted the mattress for me to join her.

I didn't need to be told twice, and kicked off my shoes before laying down beside her. Bella yawned and snuggled against me with a heavy sigh.

"How is she?"

"Maybe a little better," Bella mumbled.

"How about you?"

"Tired. I sleep better with you. Angela kicks in her sleep," Bella groused in an undertone.

I opened my mouth to reply but Bella was already asleep. I watched her chest rise and fall with reassuring rhythm and fell to counting her heartbeats while she snatched what rest she could.

It had been three days since Angela's news and Bella had been keeping her company every night since then. I was unwilling to leave the two women alone in the apartment and so unbeknownst to Angela I had been spending the evenings in Bella's room. We had fallen into a routine of sorts. Bella and Angela would talk in bed until they fell asleep, while Emmett and Jasper patrolled the area around the apartment building. In the morning Bella would creep back into her room and we would snatch a couple of hours together before it was time to start the day.

"She's made of stronger stuff than she thinks," I observed watching Bella select her clothes for the day before she had her shower. Every morning she invited me to join her in the shower, a familiar mischievous glint in her eye, and every morning I somehow managed to decline. Perhaps I was made of stronger stuff too.

"Maybe," Bella yawned again. "It just hurts to see her like this. I wasn't much better."

"I know," I stared at my hands, blinking when Bella suddenly appeared in my field of vision to give me a hurried kiss.

"Enough of that," Bella breathed. Another kiss and then she disappeared into the bathroom. "Won't be long."

When Bella was ready I would appear on their doorstep to escort both women to college. We were careful not to flaunt our relationship in front of Angela while she was so fragile, and of Ben there was no sign. He had apparently sent a few text messages here and there to people but was nowhere to be seen on campus. Perhaps that was a blessing, although Angela still looked for him whenever she could.

"Have you got much coursework today?" Bella was asking as I followed them towards the café.

"Some," Angela shrugged, "but I'm not sure what-," she stopped with a curious look on her face as she studied the cell phone she was carrying.

"Problem?" Bella asked.

"It's Ben," Angela replied, sounding distant.

That got our immediate attention.

"What does he say?" Bella leaned forward to look at the phone.

"He wants to see me. He says we need to talk."

"Well that's good, right?" Bella was watching carefully to gauge her reaction.

"I think so," Angela was still gazing at the phone, two high spots of colour blooming on her face. Her thoughts jumped wildly from one scenario to another; of Ben dashing her hopes; of Ben telling her he had been mistaken; kissing her. Any negative thoughts were banished almost instantly and I hoped for her sake that she was going to be proven right. She seemed too kind a person to be rejected in love at such a relatively young age.

"When?"

"After his lab class," Angela looked at the phone again as if worried the message would disappear.

"So late?" Bella looked puzzled at this and then brightened. "Maybe that's so you guys can go out for dinner or something."

"Maybe, I don't know," Angela gave a trembling sigh and then tucked the phone away. "Will you come with me?" she asked Bella.

"Sure," Bella didn't hesitate. "Just tell me where and when and I'll be there."

The afternoon passed in a haze of mild tedium for me, and an agony of suspense for Bella. At lunch time Bella had at least succeeded in persuading Angela to go home and get changed into an outfit that made her feel more confident than she was feeling. Once she had passed inspection Bella had let her return to campus and then had taken me up on my suggestion of some peace and quiet elsewhere.

"What if he really breaks her heart this time?" Bella was fretting as she paced my room. She didn't have any afternoon classes and so she had time to kill before Angela called. I found myself admiring her nervous energy, watching the pulse in her throat jump, the way she fidgeted before she spoke. She was so alive, so _vital._

"We'll just have to wait and see."

"You can do that, I'll check my options," Bella said. "Alice!" She had barely finished calling before Alice appeared in the doorway.

"She'll be okay," Alice offered in a peremptory tone and a quick smile. "I think."

"You think?" Bella stared at her. "That's the kind of caveat I'm not used to hearing from you. What gives?"

"She's kinda … blurry," Alice admitted, "but the little I can see she seems okay."

"I guess that's good enough," Bella allowed in a doubtful tone. She glanced out the window. It was late afternoon and the sky was ablaze with colour making the forest look as it if was on fire. "Maybe I should get on back to campus soon."

"I'll get the car," I offered instantly.

"Do you think you need to?" Bella asked absently as she stared out the window.

"Do you really need to ask that?" I raised an eyebrow at her naivety.

"Point taken," she muttered, "but maybe you should hang back a bit."

I stared at her as she shrugged on a striped hoodie and then pulled her hair back into a careless ponytail. She gave herself a quick inspection and then raised an eyebrow at me in silent query. I grinned back at her; it didn't matter what she wore, I always thought she looked perfect.

"Oh Bella," Alice appeared in the doorway, "I don't know what I'm going to do with you."

"You'll have plenty of time to work that out," Bella laughed as Alice took in what she was wearing. Standing there barefoot in her jeans she looked younger than she was. It was something I realised would come in handy the next time we had to pass ourselves off as freshmen.

"At least you and I both know what you're wearing underneath," Alice said with a cryptic smile that turned decidedly wicked when a tide of colour swept up Bella's neck and into her cheeks.

"Alice," Bella hissed, flapping at her to be quiet.

"Am I missing something?"

"Oh most definitely," Alice went on in an airy tone as she stepped into the room, "but it's something you'll love finding out later. Right, Bella?"

"Whatever," Bella mumbled as she snatched a fresh pair of socks out of the drawer where she had taken to keeping various items of clothing for when she stayed over.

"What-," I began and then stopped as my mind flashed to the bags of shopping Alice had produced when Bella began to settle into our family. Bags and bags of lacy wisps of under-wired confectionary all designed to seduce and beguile. All unnecessary as far as I was concerned, but it seemed that the girls had been having fun. "Never mind."

"Good call," Alice patted my cheek indulgently. "The fun will be in finding out later." She turned to Bella. "In the meantime, there's this."

"What've you done now?" Bella's blush was still staining her face but she accepted the proffered bag with a wary smile. She peeked inside and then gave Alice a delighted grin. "I don't believe it."

"Neither do I," Alice sighed as Bella gleefully produced a pair of turquoise blue converse sneakers. "Let's just put this moment behind us and never speak of it again."

"Like hell," Bella was already pulling them on, "these are fantastic. Hey, did you know that you can get glitter-,"

"Oh give me a break," Alice sighed, shaking her head when Bella laughed. "You really like them that much?"

Bella stood up and stamped her feet a couple of times.

"I really do. They're just a cheerful kind of shoe."

"You know, stiletto heels can be pretty damn happy too," Alice said in a hopeful tone.

"Maybe. Too bad I can't walk in them though," Bella retorted.

"It's something to work towards," Alice promised, looking thoughtful.

"And on that note, I'm outta here," Bella vowed. "Coming?" She held out her hand for me and I took it as she tugged me determinedly towards the door.

o * o * o * o * o

"Where the hell has everyone come from?" Bella frowned through the windscreen at the influx of cars in the parking lot.

"There's a concert on the main green tonight," I answered as we circled to make another lap in a vain bid to find a vacant space.

"That must be it," Bella agreed. "Perhaps Ben's going to take Angela to it after they've had a talk."

"Maybe," I allowed.

Emmett had offered to come along for the ride but I had instead asked him to run another perimeter check around the house and surrounding forest. Rosalie was keeping him company and Jasper was going to be circling the campus area while Alice kept watch. The family was occupied and on full alert, and yet I still like I was missing something.

Bella checked her watch and made a quiet sound of frustration.

"We're late, and Angela's going to be stressed enough as it is." She gave me a hesitant glance. "Listen, can you _hear_ anything weird?"

"No more so than usual," I allowed, "what's your idea?"

"How about I get out here and run straight over to the lab building while you find somewhere to park?"

"How about you don't?" I wasn't impressed with this suggestion at all, and my flat tone made it abundantly clear.

"I'll keep my phone in my hand at all times," Bella countered.

"Or I could keep you in the car."

"Or how about-," Bella opened the car door making me tap on the brakes enough to get an indignant blast on the horn from the car behind us. The pause was all she needed, and she was out of the car and closing the door before I could snatch at her. Impressive given my inhuman speed, but with Bella's mind perpetually closed to me she of course had the element of surprise. She leaned in through the open window with an apologetic smile. "See you soon?" With that, she scampered off as fast as she could.

I gaped at her in astonishment before the car behind me tooted again, and I peeled out of the parking lot with an angry snarl. If Bella thought she was going to have a hard time living down her last act foolishness, if anything happened to her now it would be _decades_ before I would willingly let her leave my sight. I was blocked in by slow moving traffic, making it feel like an age before I could get anywhere. I practically abandoned the car in the first space I saw and was on my way when my phone rang.

"Not now, Alice," I growled.

"Yes, _now_," Alice said. "She's gone again."

"I know, she just got out the car and-,"

"No I mean _gone_. The dog must be nearby because she just up and vanished."

The phone handset gave an ominous creak and I forced myself to relax my grip. He had said he wasn't going to stop watching her, although when he had kept his distance in the past Alice's visions hadn't been affected. Clearly it was a proximity issue that meant that he was close to her; too close for my liking. Chaffing at the human pace I had to maintain I broke into a light jog to try and get to the library as quickly as possible.

The concert was in the middle of campus and my progress was hampered by congested groups of students who milled in groups or wandered without any clear direction. I could have swept them aside with a gesture but made myself work through the crowd with muttered apologies when I was perhaps rougher than necessary. I looked ahead and saw the squat chemistry building; something was definitely wrong. The entire building was blacked out. The class – if there had even been one – had ended long ago. By the time I reached the building my sense of foreboding was getting stronger. My phone buzzed again.

_Be there soon. A._

I shoved the handset in my pocket not noticing with the seams gave with a slight whine of tearing thread. I had to get inside. As I got to the front entrance I saw a sign advising that the laboratory was closed due to the concert that evening. I frowned at this, recognising the sign for the lie that it was. I flicked the lock on the door with the gentlest of pressures, watching the metal spring back before I eased the doors open wide enough to admit me.

Pacing into the small foyer of the building I stopped and listened, every sense of high alert. I could smell Bella immediately but something was wrong. My tongue flickered out to taste the air. Her scent had permeated my sense memory long ago but now I could detect a different undertone; something over-ripe and floral. It was someone else, and the moment I realised that I had my answer; Victoria. The scent of James threaded throughout it all, rich with decay and fear. Standing completely still I closed my eyes and searched with my mind, listening for thoughts and any other signs of life. Angela's thoughts bloomed in my mind almost instantly.

_Oh god her eyes Ben what has she done to Ben Where did they take Bella I don't understand I .. Ben's moving and he's alive and Bella what are they doing to Bella I don't-_

Of course; Alice hadn't seen James or Victoria anywhere because they had been hiding behind Ben for the last few days. Angela and Ben were alive, but it sounded as if the nomads had other plans for Bella. The two innocents had been used as little more than bait.

_Sweet and ripe, good choice_.

I snarled at the gloating tone of James' thoughts and could watched her through his eyes. He was touching her, running a grubby fingertip down Bella's cheek as she tried to flinch away.

"Now, now," he was saying, "play nice."

"Here's a tip, why don't you go fu-," Bella began but her words were but off with a hoarse scream of agony.

"Talk to me like that again and it'll be your other hand," James said in a low snarl. "Look at the camera."

My head snapped to the right at the sound of her choked sob. They were at the end of the building. The distance was a pittance but I had to move with extreme care. Should I reveal myself too soon there was the possibility that James would hurt Bella. She was already so very, very fragile; so breakable. I had to protect her as best I could.

"Beautiful, very visually dynamic. I've chosen my stage well," James commented.

"What've you done with Jacob? I know he was here," Bella managed at last.

"Victoria's busy laying a scent trail for your boy to follow," James replied.

I edged closer to the doorway and peered around it, watching James as he paced around Bella who was huddled on the floor with a small camera in one hand. He crouched down and took roughly cupped Bella's chin.

"What is it that makes you so special to Edward?" he mused as he turned her head this way and that as if trying to solve a puzzle.

Bella glared at him through her tears of pain but didn't say a word.

"Perhaps we can work together to find out." James released Bella only to grasp her broken hand and squeeze. He watched her reaction as she screamed anew, raising the camera to zoom in on her agony. "Tell Edward to avenge you," he coaxed.

"He has nothing to do with this, you sick-," Bella choked.

"_Tell him_," James hissed as he squeezed her hand harder.

He leaned in a fraction closer to her, turning slightly so that his back was to the door. It was the opportunity I needed. The beast in me had been long caged, and he came out roaring. I body slammed James hard enough that we were both propelled across the room in a cacophony of tearing floorboards and tangling limbs.

James had barely time to flinch at my attack and now his snarl was cut short as my hands closed around his throat. His eyes glittered as he struggled and managed to push me away with a desperate heave. I skidded away but rebounded again, only to be pushed aside as I leapt. Now I was the one being restrained, my head slamming against the wall. A distant part of my mind registered the cracking of plaster and wondered how this was going to be explained away.

"Nice try _boy_," James snarled, "but you're alone, and I'm stronger."

"That's what you think," I grunted. I managed to get an arm free long enough to bring my elbow down sharply across his arms to break his hold. We moved in a blur, shifting and grappling, both on the same mission to destroy each other in whatever way we could. At one point I was close enough to sink my teeth into his neck and with a wrench of my head tore away a chunk of flesh. The sound of his scream gave me a rush of satisfaction as venom flooded into my mouth in preparation for anther attack.

Before I could lean forward for another bite James gave a sudden desperate buck o his hips that was enough to shift my centre of gravity. A moment's hesitation on my part, the barest fraction of a second, was enough for him to brace his hands on my chest and push me away. I flew across the room clawing at the air for purchase before impacting into a corner of the room hard enough to hear an ominous creak from the structure. Blinking as plaster dust showered into my eyes I tracked James to see him lunge towards Bella who was making a slow crawl towards the door. She was moving like a wounded animal and I felt a spasm of fear as I realised that he had managed to injure her even before I had arrived.

Bella shrieked as James grabbed her by the ankle and unceremoniously dragged her towards him. Her face was white with pain and I saw that her leg was twisted at an unnatural angle. I got to a crouch and launched myself across the room with a snarl, my bloodlust amplified with rage.

No matter how fast I was, James had the tactical advantage and he took advantage of it. Time slowed to an agonising crawl as I watched James grasp one of Bella's wrists, raising it to his mouth and smiling at me before he dipped his head and sank his teeth into her flesh. I heard a feral scream in the room and it took me a moment to realise that the sound had come from me.

I cannoned into James with so much force that Bella was swept aside. All of my rage and fear had distilled in this moment and I began to attack James with such ferocity that I saw fear bloom in his eyes at last. How long had it been since he had feared for his life? It didn't matter. Now he could see with perfect clarity that today he would die, and it would be at my hands.

_Edward, we're here._

Emmett's mental voice sounded like a trumpet and I was dimly aware of hands batting at mine, shoving me away as Emmett and Jasper appeared at my side. Somehow they both shouldered me aside so that they could restrain James who was struggling wildly as he snarled his fury at us.

"Edward!"

This time the shout was vocal and I turned to see Carlisle crouching at Bella's side.

"I need you here, Bella's badly hurt," Carlisle added.

"We'll take it from here," Jasper added from behind me. My eyes widened as I saw Alice enter the ruined lab and pace deliberately towards where my brothers stood with their captive.

_Go to her, Edward._ Alice's mental voice was calm. _I know what to do._

I had only taken a few paces towards Carlisle when Alice broke into a skipping run to leap at James. I shot a brief glance behind me in time to see Alice land with her weight on James's thighs before she grasped him by the head and _pulled_. James' incoherent scream was abruptly cut short and the mental din of his thoughts was silenced at last.

"Bella," I rasped as I dropped to my knees at her side.

"She's losing a lot of blood," Carlisle commented with professional detachment, "and she's been bitten. You've both got some choices to make."

"No … need," Bella managed. Her face was shiny with sweat as she smiled at me with the brittle brightness of a fever victim. Her temperature was building as her body waged war against an infection it had no chance against. Soon the venom would begin to attack her nervous system and the pain would begin.

"Bella please, we can stop this." I was begging, I could hear it in my voice. Even though this was a change we had both discussed, seeing her in pain was unbearable.

"Enough," Bella gasped and arched her back, her sneakers slipping on the blood that coated the floor beneath her.

I could hear the ripping and tearing of flesh behind me as Jasper and Emmett began to dispose of James' body. Alice was ripping up pieces of floorboards and shattering desks to create a makeshift bonfire. They were moving with jerky precision as they tried to focus on the task at hand rather than the rich copper smell of Bella's blood that permeated the room and coated the back of their throats.

"All of you get out of here as quickly as you can," Carlisle barked. _Edward we're going to have to get her out of here. We don't have much time._

"I'm not scared," Bella stared up at me with glazed eyes as sweat beaded on her forehead. Neither of us could be certain just whom she was trying to reassure. "I'm not scared, I'm not scared, I'm not scared," she curled in on herself as another wave of pain hit her and tried to crawl out of my arms.

"No, Bella," I tried to hold her to my side but she shook her head feverishly.

"Let go, I'm going to-," she doubled over before turning her head and vomiting onto the ground beside her.

"Carlisle," my plea sounded like a roar, "we've got to do something."

"There's nothing I can do," Carlisle replied as he checked her pulse. "You know what it's like." He reached up to smooth away the hair that had matted to her face with tears and sweat, shooting me an exasperated look as I growled.

"Oh," Bella shuddered again and turned back into my embrace, trying to burrow into my chest as if trying to crawl away from the pain.

"What are my options? There must be something-," I choked on the words as Bella clutched at my shirt, her hands nearly ripping the fabric in her desperation.

"You can suck out the venom," Carlisle was working on the gash in Bella's thigh, "but if you're going to do that you'll have to be quick. She's bleeding out, Edward." Carlisle jerked off his belt and wrapped it around Bella's thigh as a hasty tourniquet. I couldn't bear seeing Bella in pain; it had to be stopped. I bent my head to her arm and felt Bella's hand on my face. I looked up at her in time to see her swing her hand back and slap me again.

"Ow," she shook her hand, momentarily distracted from her other pain while her hand smarted, tears running down her face as she convulsed in my arms again.

"You hit me," I said wonderingly.

"To stop-," she grimaced, "you from being stupid."

"But the pain," I began and watched as she grunted and shook her head at me again.

"No ... different for you," she gasped. "Don't waste it, Edward."

Waste what? I looked at her in confusion but realisation dawned as she raised her other wrist to me in unmistakeable invitation. The skin was smooth and unmarked.

"Do it," Bella's voice was a whimper. "I want you to. Please, don't let me be changed by _him._" She sucked in a shuddering breath as another wave of pain rippled through her. "Make me yours. Please."

I hesitated as I cupped her wrist, raising it slowly to my lips as I watched her all the while.

"Are you sure," I croaked.

Bella could only nod, swallowing back a groan and blinking as sweat trickled into her eyes. Her lips moved and I leaned forward trying to make out what she was saying. No sound emerged but I saw her form the words 'I love you'. It was enough, and her skin offered no resistance.

Nothing could have prepared me for this moment. The glorious taste of her blood rushed to every cell in my body sending me spinning into sensory overload. I hadn't even realised I was clutching Bella's wrist to my lips until Carlisle's hand clamped on my shoulder. I paused long enough to snarl at him, not nearly done with my feast.

_Enough._ Carlisle was the voice of reason but I ignored him. The taste was glorious, making me feel alive in a way that nothing else had in the last century.

_EDWARD, YOU'RE KILLING HER!_

Carlisle's mental shout broke through and I paused long enough to give a careful nod. The grip on my shoulder eased slightly but Carlisle didn't remove his hand. I bent forward again and licked the bite mark to seal it closed with her venom. Next I picked up her other wrist and carefully sucked at it to remove the taint of James' venom before replacing it with my own.

_Mine._ I couldn't have stopped the possessive rumble in my throat even if I had tried. Gently clasping Bella's hands in my own, I kissed her palms and tried to offer her a reassuring smile. Bella's lips quivered as she stared back at me and tried to smile in return. She gave a low groan and I watched horrified as her eyes rolled back in her head and she went completely limp.

Carlisle checked her over and gave me a small nod. "She's passed out, it's a blessing. We've got to get her out of here."

**A/N: Yeah I know … cruel to end it here, right? Swimom7's making all manner of dire threats. Oh and hey, wanna know why there was such a big lag in between the last few updates? Because the same SWIMOM7 gave me an idea for a oneshot that isn't finished yet either. She's a cruel woman. Blame her! **

**Actually, while you're chasing her with pitchforks, I'll start on the next update … **


	24. Chapter 24

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, just me doing my usual 'what if' caper._

**SLCh24**

Emmett and Jasper had all but ordered the rest of us out of the building while they disposed of James' body. Emmett had been the main surprise, taking care of obliterating any evidence with ruthless efficiency with no sign of his jovial nature to be seen. Jasper had been under considerable strain with the heightened emotions in the room, but Alice had taken him by the hands and had spoken to him in a fierce whisper. He had nodded once and then ceded control of the situation to his younger brother. With constant reassurance from his mate he was able to function despite the fresh human blood in the room and my obvious euphoria at its taste. Alice had flickered me a glance when I had cradled Bella's limp from in my arms and stood, but otherwise had kept her attention on Jasper.

"Edward."

I looked up to see Carlisle and what he was holding in his hands.

"Are you sure?"

"No." His admission was simple. "There's no way of knowing if morphine will do anything to ease the pain, but we have to try."

I looked down at Bella. Even though she was unconscious she still twitched and whimpered as her body waged war against the venom that was restructuring her system. Would morphine be able to ease the transition, or would the venom metabolise it along with anything else it encountered? The odds weren't in our favour but if it spared even a fraction of Bella's pain it was worth a try.

"Do it."

Carlisle administered the injection as gently as he could, even though we both knew that the pinprick of the needle would be inconsequential to anything else she might be feeling.

Emmett was coaxing the flames into a steady blaze as he threw on a leg with the ease of a man tossing a log onto a campfire. Tracking movement from the corner of his eye he saw a dismembered hand inching towards its matching fellow, and kicked it into the fire with a grin of satisfaction.

"Get outta here, Edward. We'll finish up," he instructed.

"Where are the others?" I asked, shifting Bella in my arms as her head lolled back.

"Ben was unconscious and Angela's in shock. Rosalie's watching them but they haven't seen her. I figure we've only got a few minutes before someone raises the alarm."

"Right," I nodded at this and then looked for Carlisle. He made an incongruous sight. Alice and Jasper worked with Emmett making sure every scrap of the nomad was in the fire, their expressions solemn as they paced around staring at the floor as they searched. Meanwhile Carlisle was standing at one of the laboratory sinks, his shirtsleeves shoved up as his elbows as he fastidiously scrubbed away any trace of blood.

"Come on Edward, you've got to get Bella home," he urged as he dried his arms and pulled down his sleeves, making himself presentable once more. When he was straightened up he looked as unflappable as ever.

"What about you?"

"Getting out of here is the main thing and then I'll need to be present at the hospital when Ben's brought in. I'll defuse the situation as much as I can. Alice?" Carlisle looked at his daughter who was staring at the flames with a slight frown.

"It'll be okay, we can make the fire look like a problem with the gas connection here," Alice replied as she reached for Jasper's hand.

"And the others?" Carlisle was still worried.

"It's all in a state of flux but ultimately I think we'll be in the clear." Alice frowned and 'looked harder', and her expression turned sorrowful. "Poor Bella," she said with soft regret.

"Why, what's wrong?" The genuine pain in her voice made me anxious, and I heard Jasper hiss in the background, followed by a firm 'steady' from Emmett.

"She's dead," Alice announced.

I flinched at this and looked at the still warm body in my arms.

"Not yet," Alice soothed, "but to all intents and purposes she will be."

And now I understood Alice's regret on Bella's behalf. There had been no time for goodbyes.

o * o * o * o * o

Bella had regained consciousness briefly when we got her back home. Her wakefulness precluded a bout of vomiting as her body purged itself of any vestige of her human life. Groaning she had tried to push me away from her humiliation, not understanding that the actions of her body were utterly blameless.

It was Esme and Rosalie who had stepped in, brisk and efficient to tend to her needs and dignity. Bella, crying and almost incoherent with pain had watched me as I was lovingly but firmly ushered out of the room by Esme. The last thing I saw before the door closed had been Rosalie smoothing Bella's matted hair off her forehead with the ghost of a smile that hinted at sisterhood.

I was standing in the corridor as they had left me when Rosalie reappeared moments later with a bag containing Bella's soiled clothing and wearing a pinched expression.

"I didn't expect this of you," I admitted.

"Neither did I," she replied, "but if she's willing to go through this then-," she broke off and gave an eloquent shrug.

Out of all of us, Bella was the only one who had entered into the bargain with some knowledge, even if that information was like trying to explain colour to a blind man.

"Emmett told her what it's really like," Rosalie volunteered.

"He did?" I was surprised. "I didn't think he could remember much."

"He remembers more than he cares to admit."

"And then some," Emmett added as he appeared at the top of the stairs. He nodded towards the door. "How is she?"

"As expected," Rosalie replied before I could.

"It's happening?" Emmett's honest face creased in confusion. "She's so quiet."

"Tell me about it," I sighed. "I don't know if that's better or worse."

"That's our girl," Emmett ventured, "always doing the unexpected."

"Let's not forget that it's doing the unexpected that got her in this mess in the first place," I shot back. My guilt at the situation had me lashing out which Emmett bore with his usual grace.

"Right, exactly where we all wanted her; becoming one of the family." Emmett shook his head at the door with a rueful grin. "Not a sound; Carlisle's going to be so proud."

"Where are the others?" I asked as Rosalie eased past us to take the clothes away to be disposed of.

"They're at the hospital with Carlisle. Alice saw that Jasper would be able to help calm things down some."

"Right," I nodded. "Any news?"

"Seems to be okay. The fire's out on campus and anything suspicious will be blamed on vandalism. It's the other factor I'm worried about," Emmett crossed his arms over his massive chest and leaned against the wall.

"Victoria," I sighed. "That's definitely a problem. She's not going to stop until she's avenged her mate."

"They were mated? Aw man," Emmett's face contorted at this as if I had just presented him with a fresh set of problems. "Bad enough that she's lost her hunting buddy but he was her _mate? _Seriously Edward, what is it about you that pissed them off so much in the first place?"

"Where do I start?" Rosalie muttered as she brushed past us and into the bedroom without a backward glance.

From downstairs I heard the front door close and then Alice appeared in front of me.

"Have I missed much?" Her eyes were sparkling as she glanced at the still closed door.

"You tell me," I grunted.

"It's going well, and I'm just in time for dress-up," Alice pronounced with satisfaction after a brief pause.

"What are the odds," Emmett muttered under his breath with a grin.

"How are Angela and Ben?" I asked as Alice chose to ignore Emmett's teasing jibe.

"They're both okay, Ben was beaten up some because they were rough with him to get his cooperation and Angela's fine."

"How rough?" I frowned at this. Ben was a good person who had done nothing to deserve being thrust into this situation.

"Broken ankle, concussion and contusions. He was more freaked out about Angela and Bella."

"How much do they know?"

"Here's the thing," Alice paused. "Ben never knew Bella got into the building, and Angela was so confused and traumatised that she can't give an adequate account of what happened. She's asking for Bella, though and the authorities haven't told her that they're still looking."

"Of course," I gave a morose nod at this. Soon Bella's physical pain would end, only for the emotional pain to begin. She would have to distance herself from the people she held dear. Unless she did that she would have to watch everyone she loved grow old and die while she stayed forever young.

_Edward, that's enough._

It was Jasper, looking more tired than I had seen in a long time. The strain of the day was clearly taking its toll. Emmett reached out and grabbed Jasper for a bear hug that he submitted to with good humour.

"Stop worrying about what might happen," he sighed as Emmett released him. He reached my side and clapped his hand on my shoulder in a gesture of solidarity.

"That's my job," Alice chimed in as she offered herself up to Jasper for a kiss, which he accepted readily. "Baby you need to hunt."

"We all do," he agreed.

"Let me finish up with Bella and then we'll go." She shot me a look as I stepped towards the door. "Let us get her ready, Edward, and then she's all yours."

I gritted my teeth. My patience was stretched to its very limits.

"What's a few more hours against forever?" Jasper asked in a quiet tone, soothing me as he spoke as Alice disappeared, closing the door behind her with a decisive 'click'.

And so it was the three of us left waiting in the corridor in suspense as the women went about their task. All we could hear was the swish of damp sponges and then the rasp of cotton against bare skin.

"The suspense is killing me," Emmett ventured at last. "I don't know how Rosie did it."

"Neither do I," I admitted.

_Edward you can come in now._

Esme had barely finished the invitation and I was inside the room and at Bella's side in an instant. Bella had been lovingly washed and dressed, and now looked as if she was ready to rise from her slumber and go straight to a soiree.

"What have you done?" I was outraged.

"What are you talking about?" Alice replied. _She looks beautiful_.

"Of course she is," I waved a hand at the silken folds encasing Bella's too-still body, "but she never dresses like this."

"She will one day," Alice was stubborn.

"Granted, but she'll have enough to adjust to when she opens her eyes without this." I sat on the foot of the bed and gently plucked at the thin leather strap of the sparkling diamante stiletto sandal. Easing the shoes off Bella's unresisting feet I handed them over to Alice who took them with a sigh.

"Anything else? Want me to get some jeans and a lumberjack shirt while we're at it?"

"Alice," Esme chided, watching as

"Okay, I'll be good," Alice subsided with a nod, plucking at Bella's hem. "Guess there's nothing left to do but wait.

Taking her at her word, I turned my attention back to Bella and began my vigil.

o * o * o * o * o

_Esme tells me you haven't moved all day._

In the last three days the family had stayed in and around the immediate vicinity of the house, leaving only to hunt. They had all taken it in turns to try to coax me away from Bella's side but I had refused to budge. Carlisle's hand rested on my shoulder as he stood beside me and considered his patient.

"Not long now," he commented. "She's so quiet," he marvelled as he stepped into the room and ran a gentle hand along Bella's unmoving arm. I shifted in my seat, curbing my over-protective instinct to reach over and bat his hand away.

Bella was no longer warm to the touch as her body's internal systems were shutting down. The agony of my own transformation didn't have the clarity of the perfect recall I now possessed, but I would do anything to ease it for Bella. She had whimpered when moved but after that had made no sound at all. Other than the occasional clench of her fists as she gripped at the end of the bed or at my hands I would have no indication as to what she was feeling. The small gestures I could detect however, didn't make me feel any better.

"How do you think she's going?" I asked.

"Listen," Carlisle encouraged. The room was silent but for the frantic drumming of Bella's heartbeat.

"Ah," Carlisle said, "it's almost over."

As if on cue Alice appeared in the room and stood at the foot of the bed, cocking her head to one side as she regarded the tableaux.

"She's getting clearer now. She's going to be dazzling."

"She always was before," I growled.

"You know what I mean," Alice replied as she stepped closer to the bed and reached out to take my hand. "_Look_ at her."

She dropped her shields and showed me a glimpse of our future.

"Oh," I could hear the tone of wonder in my voice. "She really is going to be fine."

"Of course she is."

"You weren't quite so sanguine earlier."

"There were a lot of blank spots earlier. She's ridiculously clear to me now."

"Can you concentrate for me? On the clock – give me an estimate."

Alice sighed. "So impatient. Fine. Give me a sec-"

"Thank you Alice," I replied as I settled one of Bella's hands in my own. "Not long now, love," I whispered.

As if in response Bella's faltering heartbeat began to pick up speed. I gripped at her hands, trying to will away the pain.

"She'll be fine, Edward," Carlisle encouraged, "I've never heard anything so vital." _Perhaps the morphine worked._ His mental thoughts were flavoured with hope that he may have in some way spared pain for the woman he already thought of as his daughter.

"I'll get the others," Alice said and promptly disappeared to gather the rest of the family.

"Is it time?" Esme inquired in a soft voice from the doorway, the rest of my family standing behind her.

I nodded but didn't take my eyes off Bella.

Emmett eased himself around Esme to walk towards the bed, watching her with a blend of curiosity and reverence.

"Is this what you remember when it was my time?" He asked Rosalie in a whisper without taking his gaze of Bella.

"It was worse," Rosalie admitted as she stepped forward herself to take Emmett's hand. "You were louder," she admitted with a wry smile.

Emmett flickered a glance at me before he leaned forward and brushed a kiss against Bella's temple, the gesture all the more gentle considering his size.

"See you soon, baby sister," he whispered before straightening up.

Alice watched us all with a sad smile that I now understood in a flash of clarity. She had no memory of her change; whoever had infected her with their venom had not lingered to see the consequences. She had been discarded, left to wake up with a raging thirst and no memory of who or where she was. Jasper put an arm around Alice's shoulders to pull her to his side in a reassuring hug. Alice blinked, and the melancholy in the room dispersed.

Bella's heart was beating so fast now it sounded like a single, sustained note. Her body was pouring the last of its fuel into this final surge. Her back arched, bowing off the bed. At last her heart sounded with a hollow-sounding thud, stuttered twice and then just once more. There was no sound. No breathing. Just a brief pause before she opened her eyes and gazed up at us in wonder.

A fraction of a second later Bella had jumped from the bed and was huddled in the furthest corner of the room, hissing at the rest of my family who were gathered near the doorway.

"Bella," I stepped forward and held out an imploring hand. "It's okay."

Her gaze darted everywhere trying to take in everything at once. She cocked her head and looked at the window, getting distracted as she looked at the dust motes dancing in the air.

"Bella, love? I'm sorry, I know it's disorienting, but you're all right. Everything is fine." I tried again. When I had her attention again I moved towards her. When I was close enough I reached out to stroke my fingers across her cheek. She was warm again. It wasn't human warmth, but certainly an improvement on the coldness of death that had been clinging to her earlier.

She stood blinking at me for a nanosecond, long enough for me to wonder if she had understood what I had said, and then moved so quickly I barely had time to brace for impact. Her arms clamped around me so fiercely that I gave a mild grunt of protest, before wrapping my arms around her out of sheer reflex. At last there was no need to hold back, only this time she was stronger.

"Uh, Bella?" I ventured after a long moment. She looked up at the sound of my voice and I offered what I hoped was a reassuring smile but probably looked like more of a pained grimace. Her eyes widened and she dropped her arms in a flash, standing before me like a penitent child as she ducked her head. "Don't panic, you're just a bit stronger than I am for the moment."

I stroked her face again, watching her closely as she shuddered against my touch. She reached up with elaborate caution to touch her fingertips to my cheeks, smiling at the contact before she gave me a deliberate look.

"I love you," she said at last.

My smile answered her before I could form any words around the sudden lump in my throat.

"As I love you," I murmured. Cupping her face in my hands I learned forward slowly enough to remind her to be careful and touched my lips to hers. We parted slightly, enough for me to see the smile on Bella's lips as she leaned into my touch and kissed me again. This time the kiss was longer. Long enough for us to be reminded that we weren't alone by a low chuckle from Emmett.

"You've been holding out on me," Bella commented when we parted again, her eyes narrowing a tiny bit.

I laughed, overcome with relief that it was all over. The fear, the pain, the uncertainties were behind us now.

"It was necessary at the time," I reminded her, "now it's your turn now to break me." I laughed at that and hugged her tighter against me, simply because I could.

Carlisle stepped around Emmett and walked towards us, his face bright with curiosity.

"How do you feel, Bella?"

"Overwhelmed," Bella ventured. Her eyes had widened as she looked at my father, blinking and leaning further into my side in a mute request for support. "There's a lot to process, but I still feel like …. _me_." She cocked her head in puzzlement at this. "Is that normal?"

"You're certainly more in control than others I've seen," Carlisle commented. His thoughts were racing from one hypothesis to the next. "I gave you a very liberal dose of morphine, perhaps that did something to assist the transition. What can you recall?"

Somehow I managed not to wince when Bella gripped at my side convulsively, wrapping my arms around her out of sheer reflex as she tried to burrow closer.

"It burned," Bella whispered. With her free hand she reached up to cup her throat.

"Oh I'm sorry, Bella," Carlisle soothed, "you must be thirsty. Edward will see that you're looked after."

"Wait!" Alice interjected. "Don't I get to say hello to my new sister?"

I blinked, and then couldn't stop the slow smile that spread across my face as Bella offered her new family a shy smile.

It was all the encouragement they needed. With a barely suppressed sound of glee Alice was across the room and wrapping herself around Bella before anyone could blink. Bella gave a muffled laugh that turned into a choked sob as Alice peppered her cheeks with kiss and hugged her again.

"My sister," Alice pronounced with satisfaction.

"Aw hell, I'm gettin' in on this," Emmett growled as he stepped forward, brushing Alice protests aside as he engulfed Bella in a hug that lifted her off her feet. I stood watching as my family greeted her each in their own inimitable way. Rosalie was more restrained in her greeting, but her acceptance of Bella over the last three days, and the careful press of hands against Bella's spoke volumes of the relationship to come. Esme's delight was mirrored by Carlisle's, but it was Jasper who surprised me the most. He had hung back from the group with a broad smile on his face, soaking up the goodwill in the room like a sponge and yet all the while his thoughts were filtered with mild regret.

He felt the weight of my gaze and offered a raised eyebrow in return.

_Just reflecting on what might have been for each of us, Edward. We all have different experiences in crossing over. Bella's had the best of all so far. I just wish it could have been the same when it was my time._

I nodded at this. Bella's transition had been by no means painless if her reaction to Carlisle's question was anything to go by, but to wake up surrounded by so much love seemed to be taking the edge off. Bella's gaze still darted from one person to the next, and her response times were jerky as she tried to assimilate her heightened senses, but her smile and delight were genuine. Even now though, I could see her swallow with a wince of effort, and knew that there was an important matter to attend to.

"Sweetheart, you need to hunt," I cut through the crowd of people, extending my hand towards her and drawing her close.

"Will that stop the-," she rubbed at her throat for emphasis.

"For the most part," I cautioned. "Come." We had nearly made it to the door when Bella stopped dead in her tracks, bringing me to a sudden halt as well. I turned to see Bella gazing down at what she was wearing.

"What the hell?" Bella plucked at the silk dress and then turned to see out Alice. "You did this?"

"I didn't hear you arguing," Alice countered.

"I was _unconscious_," Bella argued and then paused, "or something. Seriously, you expect me to go out like this?"

"Well here's the thing," Alice was stalling, "I didn't factor on you charging out of here straightaway, but-,"

"Alice," Bella warned in a low tone.

Alice sighed and threw up her hands. "_Fine_. Your things are in the closet, and can I just say that you're no fun."

"Noted," Bella pursed her lips. "Now get out while I change."

"Please," Alice snorted, "you know I've seen when you were-,"

"Now's not the time for this conversation," Bella made shooing motions with her hands.

"Oh I don't know, sounds like things are just getting interesting," Emmett commented as Rosalie pulled him towards the doorway.

I watched them go and turned back to say something to Bella only to have my words dry on my lips at the sound of ripping fabric.

"Shit," Bella swore in a soft voice, "and this looks expensive." She looked at the torn silk and the zipper that had ripped off in her hands.

"Can I," I had to pause and swallow before trying again. "Can I help?"

Bella looked up at this and gave me a quick smile. "Probably." She opened the closet and inspected the contents before making a selection. "How about I get changed in the bathroom, and you help me with the fastenings?"

"Deal," I managed.

She had gathered up some clothes and disappeared into the bathroom while I stood and tried to gather my thoughts. Bella's level of control was staggering. It was not unheard of for newborns to tear their surroundings apart in their desperation for blood and yet here she was changing her clothes before being taken out for her first hunt. I shook my head and smiled to myself before looking up sharply at the sound of a quiet gasp of pain. I nearly took the bathroom door off in my haste to get to Bella and stopped when I saw Bella staring at her reflection in the mirror with a look of mild revulsion.

"What's wrong?"

"My eyes," she murmured as she leaned forward. The venom had replaced her warm brown regard with a ruby stare.

"They'll change," I soothed as I wrapped my arms around her.

"When?" Bella couldn't look away from her reflection, her hands fluttering up with her eyes, tracking the movement in the mirror as if to confirm that it was real.

"They'll darken in a few months. Our diet dilutes the colour, so your eyes will turn amber and then they'll lighten to gold."

Bella turned and fisted her hands in my shirt, not noticing when the cotton popped and ripped.

"You don't hate it?"

"You're beautiful," I assured her, and the blatant truth in my voice seemed to mollify her. I had considered Bella beautiful when she was human, but now it was as if the venom had burned away any weakness to distil her true essence. What was attractive before was now breathtaking. I gazed at her reflection over her shoulder and felt a possessive rumble building in my chest.

Mine.

Bella was looking in the mirror again, turning her head this way and that.

"Are you okay?" It was a ridiculous question to ask given the change in Bella's situation, but she seemed to be taking it all so rationally that I didn't know what else to say.

"I think so," she nodded. "I don't know what I expected but this is …," she broke off and swallowed with a wince, "alright, so _that's_ getting old pretty damn fast."

"We can do something about that," I assured her as I took her hand. "Come on."

I led Bella downstairs and stopped when I saw my family waiting for us in the living room.

"No fair, Alice probably helped," Emmett turned to Jasper with a scowl.

"No sir, I just figured she has more class than you, monkey man," Jasper drawled.

"What's this?" Bella asked as she reached where they were sprawled on their respective sofas.

"I bet Jasper that you'd go out through the upstairs window," Emmett admitted.

"Why on earth would I do that?" Bella was mystified.

"Told you," Jasper called out as he turned his attention back to his book.

"So," Emmett went on in a manful attempt to ignore Jasper's jibe, "you two going out? Want some company?"

"I think we're good," I replied. Bella tugged at my hand again, a silent reminder of her thirst. I felt a bubble of happiness swell in my chest as we made our way towards the door. I didn't have to hunt alone any more. "Don't wait up," I called just before the door closed behind us.

Bella moved so quickly that I almost couldn't track her, running ahead of me towards the tree line and then stopping with a jerk and a soft laugh of amazement. I ran to her to see her grinning with delight.

"Incredible, I barely have to think of where I want to get to and I'm practically there. These reflexes are going to take some getting used to." She pushed her hair out of her eyes and considered me. "How do you do it? It must feel like you're moving in slow motion and yet you walked everywhere with me at campus."

"Oh I don't know," I reached out to cup her face and kiss her again, "perhaps I just needed the right motivation."

"Wow," Bella breathed, "this part I wasn't expecting."

"What part's that?" I whispered, my lips mouthing at her neck as we fitted our bodies against each other.

"The wanting you," Bella shifted a little, trying to get closer. "Rosalie had warned me that the bloodlust would be strong, but … wow. I've always wanted you but this _other_ need is so strong," she made a soft growling noise and sank her teeth into my neck, sending a jolt of desire through me.

I closed my eyes and swallowed hard, trying to keep my focus on what Bella needed, although right now she was making other needs apparent.

"Bella," her name sounded like a groan as she moved to increase contact. "You need …," I stuttered.

"I need," she affirmed.

"You need to hunt," I managed this time. "Your thirst needs to be controlled."

"Right," Bella nodded and released me with considerable reluctance.

The afternoon breeze eddied around us and Bella stiffened as she caught the scent of something on the wind. She looked at me and licked her lips, and I tried to focus on other things.

"Focus, what can you smell?" I coaxed.

"You," she said promptly and then, "wait, there's …,"

"Something else," I encouraged. "Now concentrate on where it's coming from."

"I _want _it," she said as she turned towards the forest. "Now?"

"I'll be right behind you," I promised.

o * o * o * o * o

She was magnificent. We had run through the forest for a few minutes following the scent trail that had overlaid the surrounding damp earth and coming rain. By the time the scent had grown stronger Bella was whimpering with need. At last we had found them. The sound of hooves stepping through undergrowth and then the lapping sounds of drinking at the steam.

Bella stared at the herd of deer as if mesmerised. Crouching in preparation to spring she gave a low feral growl and then caught herself in surprise at the sound. Shaking her head as if to clear it she gathered herself and jumped. The deer scattered before the appearance of the predator in their midst, and so she missed the first deer she had fixated on. It only took her a moment before she recovered her momentum, taking down the next deer that strayed into her field of vision. She lunged for it and hauled it to her mouth with a hungry snarl.

I paused in the middle of my own feed, mesmerised by the sight. She was so strong, so beautiful. By the time she finished there were over a dozen carcasses behind and I was leaning against a tree with my arms folded simply taking in the scene. Bella straightened up and wiped her forearm across her mouth, frowning when she saw the smears of blood on her arms and clothes. She stood staring at her hands long enough for me to hasten to her side.

"Bella," I began, stopping when Bella gazed at the remnants of her hunt and then at me with such a look of profound horror that the words suck in my throat.

She turned and doubled over, coughing and retching with convulsive heaves. Her body gave up nothing, not even tears as she dropped to her hands and knees and wailed into the earth. I fell to my knees beside her, putting my arms around her and hauling her onto my lap.

"Shh," I whispered against her hair as she shook and buried her face in my neck. I began rocking back and forth in a bid to calm her down, smoothing my hands over her back. Her shaking began to subside and she gave a long sigh before rubbing her face tiredly against my neck before pulling back to look at me.

"The bodies," she began and then gulped back another dry sob.

"We'll bury them, it's what we always do," I said.

"So many," Bella shivered as she stared over my shoulder.

"It won't be like that every time," I replied. "This was your first hunt, everything's magnified, including your thirst."

"Oh thank god," Bella sagged in my arms. "I had visions of decimating the wildlife population in the space of a month. She looked back at me with a sad smile. "Knowing something and experiencing it are two different things."

"Any regrets?" The question slipped out before I could filter myself.

"No," she shook her head and raised a hand to rub her thumb over my lower lip before leaning in for a kiss. "This is what I wanted."

"For better for worse," I mused, "for richer, for poorer," I went on, watching a smile tug at Bella's lips.

"We're really doing this now?" Bella asked. I'm filthy and covered in blood, you don't have a mark on you."

"I've been around longer than you," I countered.

"Hmm," Bella leaned forward to nibble at my neck again, "so I guess that makes me your child bride."

Her words gave me pause, but the sentiment rang true. Maybe the whole reason I became a vampire was so that I could live long enough to meet her. Eighty years is a long time to deny yourself the touch of another, but I had done it because I couldn't bear the thought of seeing myself as a monster in someone else's eyes. Bella had looked beyond the surface what I was to see the man that I had been; the man I still tried to be. She had sealed her belief in me with a kiss and hadn't stopped. Incredibly she had wanted to merge her life with mine. The day she had told me that was the happiest day of my existence. Wanting her so badly had come at a terrible price, and Bella had been the one to pay it.

Bella was nuzzling at me now, and I gave a low growl that made her shiver again, albeit in an entirely different way. She wriggled in my lap again with an encouraging hum as I insinuated my hands beneath the hem of her t-shirt to rub her lower back.

"Edward," her breath sighed against my face and I leaned forward to lap a drop of blood away from the corner of her mouth. "Can we, I mean, that is to say-," she stuttered.

"Say it," I encouraged.

I leaned back to see Bella looking uncharacteristically flustered. Her gaze darted from my lips to a bug negotiating a blade of grass near where we sat, to the carcasses haphazardly strewn in her wake. However much her attention was diverted though, her gaze always came back to me.

"I want you. Now." She shifted against me for emphasis. I hissed at the increased contact and snatched at her to suck at her neck hard enough to bruise, even though I knew she wouldn't. It was a gesture that met with considerable approval if her response was anything to go by, and we lost ourselves in exploring each other.

It wasn't until Bella began to attempt to wriggle out of her shirt that I managed to collect myself. We had waited too long to rut at each other like a pair wild animals in the forest, however much we both wanted to.

"You've got to be shitting me," Bella half laughed, half moaned as I gently eased me of her lap.

"Not here," I replied as I helped her to her feet. Bella launched herself at me again so quickly that I staggered back a few paces. My phone shrilled in my pocket and I sighed as I got it out to inspect the screen.

_Cabin._

"Who?" Bella managed in between kisses.

"Alice," I managed, "with a solution."

That got her attention.

"Where?"

"You'll see," I grinned as I took her hand.

o * o * o * o * o

Bella turned from her shocked inspection to give me a smile of delight.

"And it's all yours?"

"Ours," I promised as Bella reached for me to lace her fingers with mine. I watched her eyes grew darker as we touched.

"The others?" She cocked her head towards the door that was still open.

"Well out of ear-shot," I assured her as she gave a pleased little hum.

"They have cabins too?"

"We all have our own retreats," I allowed, "some on a different scale than others."

"How many?"

"Many times many," I allowed. She would find out in time, of which we also had plenty.

"So," Bella paused, watching as the light in the room cast interesting shadows. I gave her hand a gentle squeeze to get her attention and she back to see me regarding joined hands with quiet joy. "What is it?" she murmured.

"Just … being able to do this," I raised our hands and squeezed again.

Bella considered me for a moment and then stepped into my eager embrace. It wasn't until she peered around me to get a fix on the bedroom and began to steer me in that direction that I felt a qualm of fear. The back of my knees hit the bed and I sat down with a soft thud. Bella followed, straddling my lap and pushing at my chest until I was on my back.

It was abundantly clear which one of us had more experience. Granted neither of us had a vast sexual history, but Bella at least at the advantage of a history that was a little more … recent, than my own. She bent over me, her hair forming a curtain around us as she brushed her lips against mine. The kiss was soft and careful, everything that our kisses had always been.

"Do you miss it?" Her voice was hushed.

"Miss what?" I blinked at her.

"I'm not warm and soft anymore." We were so close that I could feel her lips moving as she spoke.

"You _are_ warm," I breathed as I cupped my hands on her hips, "you _are_ soft." My hands moved over the curve of her bottom, up over the small of her back. I gripped at her shirt as if to anchor myself to her. I gave the gentlest of tugs to pull her back for another kiss, which I kept chaste out of habit.

"I won't break," Bella whispered, her eyes fluttering closed as I pressed kisses down the column of her throat.

I pulled back to look at her ruby-eyed smile and then we moved toward a kiss that felt like it had always been waiting for us; moaning into each other's mouths, both of us greedy for total possession. Perhaps we would be gentle with each other another time, but for now we had many denied opportunities to make up for. My hands were fumbling at Bella's shirt when she pulled back and, pinching the fabric between thumb and forefingers gave a careful tug. The fabric ripped as it made from cobwebs and I gazed reverently at the bare skin and lace before me. I was still staring when Bella reached down and shredded my shirt as well.

"Just as well Alice likes shopping," Bella muttered

My answering laugh turned into a gasp as Bella's hands slithered below my waist. Soon though, I realised that just because it had been a while for me didn't mean I had too be submissive. Hooking a leg around her hips I gave a sudden jerk that reversed our position. I loomed over Bella and ground my hips against hers with considerable satisfaction.

Our clothing was discarded with immoderate haste and we curled and undulated against each other with whimpers and growls of encouragement. We both groaned when I eased myself into her warmth and for a moment time felt suspended. Bella was panting for air that she didn't need, the scents of our mutual arousal sending her into sensory overload.

Even though my human life was a faded memory at best the lessons of my upbringing and society were well ingrained. What we were doing was entirely wrong and disrespectful of the institution of marriage. And then Bella shifted against me and locked her ankles over my hips, and she felt so good that I couldn't give a damn.

**A/N: Yeah. I know I said only two chapters left. Turns out these guys are chattier than I thought. It won't be the never-ending story, we ARE getting to the finish line, but it's taking a little longer than expected. Um, that's okay with you guys, right?**


	25. Chapter 25

_Disclaimer: Only fanfic, folks … _

**A/N: Garnet Allen – you've disabled messages on FF and I can't get in touch!**

**Unbeta'd, so mistakes are my own and will be corrected later when I don't have so many blind spots.**

**SLCh25**

The sky was growing dark by the time our exploration of each other's bodies began to slow down. Bella sighed as she sprawled on her back, her hair a silken mass on the pillow. She reached across to paw at my shoulder and I took up the unspoken request and moved closer so that my head was on her chest.

I closed my eyes with bliss as Bella began to card her fingers through my hair, nuzzling her bare skin and pressing a kiss against it. Her heart was silent now, and whilst I missed the sound of her finite heartbeats there were too many other benefits to take into account. I wrapped my arms around her and squeezed her with a rumble of content, simply because I could.

These moments with her as a newborn were precious. This was a time in her new life - her afterlife - when everything would be a new discovery; when her world was overwhelmingly detailed and perfect, where she was too far into sensory overload for her human life to intrude. Bella twitched in my arms and I close my eyes, willing the moment to last.

"Angela," Bella breathed.

And just like that the moment was gone. I raised my head to see Bella frowning at the ceiling as she tried to remember.

"There was something," Bella's expression slackened for a moment as she focussed on the grain in the wooden beams that crossed the ceiling.

"Something," I encouraged her to continue. A part of me wanted her to forget everything. I was a new lover and greedy for total possession, but it wasn't going to happen. At least, not until she had allowed her human life to slip away.

"Angela," Bella said again as she blinked and tried to focus on me, "she's important."

"She is," I agreed in a soft voice. "What can you remember?"

"I remember," Bella swallowed hard, "there was blood, lots of blood, and she was crying. She was disappearing down a corridor and calling my name." Bella shook her head. "No wait, that's not right. I was the one being pulled away."

"That's right," I nodded, sitting up and stroking her arms as she fought to recall what little detail she could. The venom from James and myself had entered her system soon after and the resulting cellular trauma it caused would have altered her short-term memory. It was like that for all of us. "It was James, he used Angela and Ben to get to us; do you remember that?"

"James," Bella cocked her head and jerkily raised her hand to look at the silver half crescent scar on her wrist. "He did this."

"Yes," I was amazed that I managed to sound so calm. He had been disposed of, but the mere fact that he had attacked my mate still made me angry. Moving slowly with conscious effort I raised the hand I was holding to my lips before turning it slightly so she could see the scar's twin. "And then I did this."

Bella gave me a hesitant smile as my lips touched her skin and then flinched as if my touch had burned.

"_Angela,"_ she surged into a sitting position, "is she safe? Where is she?" Bella clutched at my arms and I bit my lip to stifle my involuntary hiss of pain. She truly had no idea how strong she was.

"She's fine," I managed. "She and Ben were injured but it was all treatable. They were used as bait to get to us."

Bella narrowed her eyes as she studied my face and then slackened her grasp as she leaned back, considering.

"There's something you're not telling me."

It wasn't a question.

"The circumstances of your change were a challenge," I trailed off as I tried to work out the best way to break the news to her. "What would be unacceptable to others were opportunistic to us at the time, but there were … consequences."

Bella shook her head. "You're talking like a lawyer, just say what you have to say."

I looked at Bella to see the familiar 'I want' line between her brows. Things had changed but others remained the same; Bella's stubbornness for one thing. How was she going to deal with the outcome of a situation that she had run into, and then begged me to finish?

"Say it," Bella insisted, "out loud."

I hesitated, wishing I had Alice's foresight.

"You're dead," I said simply.

"I know," she nodded raising an involuntary hand to her chest where her heart should be beating.

"It's more than that. Everyone believes you're dead."

"How?" Bella's question was a whisper.

"James is dead, killed just after he attacked you. The only way to ensure our kind _stay_ dead is to tear the body apart and burn the pieces." I shifted in the bed beside her, noting with some relief that Bella didn't move away. Bad enough that we were having this conversation naked let alone Bella withdrawing emotionally as well.

"So what did you do?"

"Just that," I nodded. "Emmett, Jasper and Alice took care of James while Carlisle and I attended to you."

"And Angela?" Bella was staring at nothing now, her gaze turned inwards as she perhaps tried to conjure up the memory of the scene I was describing. By the time James had been dismembered Bella had been succumbing to the venom that was re-writing her DNA and convincing me to speed up the process. She was plucking at the bed sheet puddled at our waists, heedless that her absent-minded action was ripping the cotton as if it were little more than a cobweb.

"The last she saw of you was when James was dragging you out of the room. She would've heard some screaming before the fire started."

"No," Bella shook her head, "it wasn't supposed to be like this."

"I know." I had to choose my words carefully. Newborns ran on pure instinct, and with her mind still closed to me I had no way of predicting what she would do next. "We all did what we thought was best at the time."

Bella gave a low groan at this and wriggled away from me to get out of bed. She got to her feet and turned to look at me, so preoccupied that she had forgotten she was gloriously naked. Concerned for her as I was, I couldn't help but pause to admire the view.

"Come on," Bella gave a peremptory flick of her hand, "we're getting cleaned up and then I need to talk to the others."

Somehow I managed not to smile at the incongruous situation we were in. Bella was a newborn, we were mated, she was trying to process her new life and all the while she was standing at the foot of the bed completely nude talking about getting dressed and seeing my family. It seemed the more things changed the more they stayed the same; Bella was as unpredictable as ever.

o * o * o * o

When we appeared at the main house my family's surprise mirrored my own. Alice stood blinking in the doorway as we approached across the clearing.

"You mean you didn't know we were coming?" Bella commented as we drew near. Of course, she could have spoken as soon as we emerged from the tree line and Alice would have heard her perfectly, but Bella didn't know that yet.

"You really think I'd check in on what you two were up to? Give me some credit." Alice managed to look amused and indignant all at once. "You have questions."

And just like that Bella's wry smile was done. Alice's gaze flickered towards me.

_Sorry, Edward_.

I gave a minute shake of my head to absolve Alice's guilt at the sudden drop in mood. Bella was in for a rough time, and although we wanted to shield her from it as much as we could the world was still going to intrude.

"Hey," Emmett greeted as he appeared in the doorway with a mocking grin on his face. "Hells Bells, don't tell me you've worn him out already. Edward, do we need to have a talk man to man?"

"Emmett," Jasper stepped forward with his hands stretched towards Bella in a placatory gesture, "now's not the time."

It was Rosalie who stepped forward to discuss the elephant in the room.

"You've told her," she said, addressing me to the exclusion of everyone else. It wasn't a question.

"Some," I allowed, shooting Bella a sideways glance as she submitted to embraces from Esme and Alice.

"How much does she know?" Rosalie went on.

"Enough that she doesn't like being spoken about as if she wasn't here," Bella interjected. Bella stepped towards me to my side, and I was struck by the slight jerkiness of her movements. She had never referred to herself as graceful, but now she telegraphed her motion as she tried to find the balance between vampire and human speed. Her attempts at control were staggering, but given her stubbornness, perhaps not surprising.

"I beg your pardon," Rosalie murmured with a dry smile and a slight inclination of her head. "Given you're a newborn I wasn't expecting you to be quite so … present … for these conversations."

Bella looked in askance at Alice who promptly rubbed her hand in a gesture to reassure.

"You're doing fine," she soothed.

"Somehow I doubt it," Bella replied with a wry smile of her own despite the gravity of the situation.

"Shall we?" This time it was Esme who spoke up, gesturing for us to sit and discuss the matter like civilised beings. Had we been human it would not have been entirely out of place for Esme to offer tea. Going by the wild look in Bella's eyes as we sat down and made ourselves comfortable, I could see the thought had occurred to her as well.

"Bella, I'm sure you have some questions," Carlisle began as he leaned forward, steepling his fingers as he regarded our newest addition to the family. "This will be a difficult period of acclimation that you-,"

"I'm dead," Bella broke in, blinking when Carlisle winced at the bluntness of her words. "Sorry," she looked at me and reached for my hand that I offered readily, "Edward told me that as far as the world is concerned I'm dead. How the hell does that work?"

This time it was Jasper who spoke.

"We needed to cover our tracks and find a way to dispose of James's body," he explained in a voice that oozed compassion and reassurance, "it was the easiest way."

"Easier for who?" Bella replied, and this time I could hear the bitterness in her voice.

"For everyone," Jasper's tone was firmer this time, and I felt Bella shrink a little against my side in response. "Dire though the situation was at the time, it wasn't entirely about you."

"If you say so," Bella mumbled, subsiding but rebellious as she struggled to comprehend the situation.

"To be fair, you weren't actually much of a participant in the situation at the time," Rosalie offered.

"Something we agree on," Bella nodded.

"But," Rosalie continued, "there's going to come a time when you'll have to accept that you were the architect of your own destruction."

"What?" Bella's surprise was genuine.

"Didn't Edward tell you to stay put? You can't deny that we were trying to keep you safe," Rosalie replied, her eyes narrowed as she watched Bella's twitching reaction, "and yet at the first chance you got you were running straight into a situation you knew nothing about."

"Angela needed me," Bella protested, "I wanted to make sure she was all right."

"And yet denying Edward the same opportunity." Rosalie was relentless. Emmett leaned forward as if to say something and then after a quick look at his mate's expression thought better of it.

"I-," Bella stopped and then blinked furiously as if trying to hold back tears that would never come. "I never really felt like there was any danger."

"That's because we're good at what we do, but even our abilities only extend so far," Carlisle remonstrated.

"Particularly when others take it upon themselves to-," Rosalie began again only to be silenced by a look from Carlisle.

"Okay I'm getting the message," Bella gritted, "I thought I was safe when clearly I wasn't, but I can work around this."

"Oh really?" Rosalie openly scoffed at this.

Bella twitched at my side as she and my sister matched each other stare for stare.

"Girls," Jasper's voice was strained, "do we really have to do this now?'

"I think we do," Rosalie replied, flicking her hair off her shoulders in a way that had the simple gesture screaming of contempt. "She'll have to see sense sooner or later."

"And we're back to talking like I'm not here," Bella muttered in an undertone.

I reached out to rub my hand over the small of Bella's back in a soothing gesture. It seemed to work for a moment as she released a shaky sigh, but I felt her muscles tense beneath my hand when Rosalie began speaking again.

"Seriously Bella, what were you thinking?" Rosalie sighed and shook her head. "How many times did we tell you being with us was dangerous?"

"All the time," Bella conceded.

"You knew what we were, your own friends _kidnapped_ you to try and get some sense into you but you wouldn't budge," Rosalie continued.

Bella glanced down and clenched her right hand into a fist. It was the same hand she had broken when she had punched Jacob. It would never break again.

"What were you expecting," Rosalie was relentless, "that you would become one of us and have a happily every after delivered to you tied up with a big fat red bow?"

"No," Bella shook her head. "Maybe. I don't know." She risked a glance at me and to my horror her face puckered as she ducked her head.

The emotion in the room shifted slightly, moving carefully towards acceptance as we sat and watched Bella try to formulate her response.

"It's just," she began and then heaved a ragged sigh, "it's all so _much_. You say I ignored the danger, and perhaps I did. I wanted to be with Edward so badly that I didn't want to consider the cost."

"Are you disappointed?" I ventured in a quiet voice, both wanting and dreading to hear her answer.

"To be honest, yeah, I think I am," Bella gave me a slight smile.

Alice's hiss was involuntary, but her reaction spoke for all of us.

"I kinda thought I'd get some sort of super ability like you, but it turns out I'm still just _me_." Bella's smile grew a little wider as I reached up to trace a finger down her cheek.

"I think you're perfect just the way you are," I promised.

"And therein lies the problem," Bella went on. She turned to look at the rest of my family, her movement brushing my fingertips across her cheek making her pause to nuzzle into my touch. "I've never felt more alive, and yet you're telling me that I have to play dead?"

"You must for the sake of all of us," Carlisle's voice was quiet but his words resonated in the quiet. He reached out and took Esme's hand as he looked at Bella, his expression radiating concern.

"Carlisle's right, this isn't going to be as easy as you saying you're going to change colleges and then skipping the ten year reunion," Rosalie said. Her tone was shifting, warming with understanding as Bella hovered on the knife-edge between grief and acceptance.

"I g-guess a part of me always knew that," Bella stuttered, "but-," she broke off and gave everyone a pleading look.

"Knowledge and experience are two different things," Esme said from her place at Carlisle's side. Her smile was gentle and tinged with regret as she regarded Bella.

"We're sorry, Bella, truly," Alice leaned forward as she spoke, her eyes wide as she projected her sincerity. "I swear I looked, I was watching all the time but I couldn't see any other outcome other than," she broke off and gave a slight shake of her head.

"Other than what?" Bella's hand clutched at my arm again, although she released it with an apologetic grimace when I gave a slight wince of protest.

"We didn't have much time, the venom was overtaking your system so quickly and then you started to argue with Edward," Alice was temporising now, almost stammering as she built her case.

"And then that?" Bella prodded. I could tell she was impatient but she sat at my side watching Alice fumble her way towards Bella's painful truth.

"The choices were to change you or to try to suck out the venom and watch you die," Alice concluded.

Bella stared at Alice for what felt like an eternity before she turned her measuring gaze on myself.

"You would have stayed to watch me die of old age?"

"It wouldn't have been like that," Carlisle answered. "The venom from James had entered your bloodstream long enough to pose a serious danger. We could have tried sucking out the venom but that would have been a localised treatment at best. The residual traces would have been enough to weaken your immune system and cause a lifetime of suffering."

"How much of a lifetime?" Bella asked after a moment's consideration.

"Difficult to say, but you would have endured perhaps a few years of treatments with little chance of success," Carlisle sighed.

If Bella had any further questions she kept them to herself. I looked at the man I regarded as my father and realised that for the first time in years he looked truly exhausted. Introducing each new member of our family had led to other such discussions in the past. Bella's situation was different in that she had willingly embraced our nature. With that knowledge however, came complications. Bella had enjoyed an independent life; she was employed and had a circle of friends that would notice her absence. She had been seen with me and we had been accepted as a couple. Her disappearance was linked to my family; subtle ties to be sure, but they were the first such ties to have been established with humans in decades.

"What about college? I was going to be graduating in a couple of months … and you guys," Bella asked, waving a hand to indicate Jasper and Alice sitting nearby.

"Not any more," Jasper replied from his place beside Alice.

"God," Bella dropped her head into her hands, "this just keeps getting worse." Her words dropped like stone into my chest.

Alice gave me a heartfelt look and even Rosalie twitched a little at Bella's words. There was a beat of silence before Bella seemed to realise what she had said.

"No, wait that wasn't what I meant," Bella scrubbed at her face with her hands and then gave me a distraught look before abruptly getting to her feet. "I need some air," she announced, and then cocked her head. "No I don't. I just … I need to be outside."

"Right," I nodded as she spoke. She needed to get away. Perhaps that meant she needed to get away from me as well. My whole world was now and would forever be centred around Bella. All I could do was love her for the rest of my existence and hope that she felt a fraction of the same for me.

It wasn't fair. None of us had chosen this life but we had all been changed in different times. It would be entirely different for Bella. Rosalie's disappearance had been a scandal at the time that had become more of a talking point after she had taken her revenge against the men who had raped her and left her for dead. Even then the police had only a few files of paper and disparaging testimonies against her fiancé.

For Bella it would be another matter entirely; digital photographs that would never fade and disintegrate, Facebook accounts in memoriam, Internet news reports … there would always be threads of her human life that would follow her into the next. Perhaps with better preparation or more time we could have engineered a way for Bella to fade away from the world. Instead James had changed all of that, and she and I had gotten greedy in the heat of the moment - quite literally in my case.

_Edward, stop worrying and look at what's in front of you._

I blinked at Jasper's sharp mental 'nudge' and saw Bella standing up and reaching out a hand in supplication.

"Come with?"

"Always," I nodded and took her hand.

Bella led me outside and released me, tipping her head back and closing her eyes as she stepped outside into the afternoon sunshine. Her skin sparkled like my own but she hadn't noticed it yet. Sighing she reached up and clutched at her head, combing her fingers through her hair as she took a deep and unnecessary breath.

"Fuuuuuuuuuuck," she sighed.

The others were still inside but I could hear their amusement at Bella's proclamation. Although I couldn't bring myself to use such language, I had to agree with the sentiment. Shoving my hands into my pockets I watched her pace forward towards a large boulder that marked the edge of the driveway that led back through the forest towards the road. What I would have given to be able to read her thoughts right now.

Bella stood staring unseeingly at the tree line for a long moment, her body practically vibrating with tension. Without warning she turned and punched the boulder with a hiss of frustration. Of course, the impact point exploded in a puff of dust and a large fissure appeared. Bella's surprise as she flinched back was almost comical and despite the gravity of the situation I had to bite my lip to hide my smile. She stood blinking at the boulder before reaching out a hand that only trembled slightly as she traced her initials onto the rock with no effort.

Bella gave a quiet huff of amusement at this and then narrowed her eyes in thought. This time she sank her hand into the rock and crumbled a fistful of stone into dust. Another pause and then Bella attached the boulder in earnest, kicking and punching as the boulder exploded into fragments. What had sounded like giggles dissolved into grunts of effort as Bella flew at the stone, trying to shred it into oblivion. When there was nothing left to destroy Bella stood covered in a fine layer of dust, her shoulders shaking with tearless sobs.

Pacing forward I took her in my arms.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered as I smoothed my hands over her hair, her back, her arms, anything I could in a bid to make her feel better.

"What have I done?" Bella spoke into my shirtfront.

"I'm so sorry," I kissed her hair. "Sweetheart, I'm so sorry."

"For what?" Bella pulled back to look at me. "You think I'm throwing a pity party for one?"

"Well-," I hesitated. All signs were that Bella was mourning her humanity. Had I been so wrong?

"Edward," Bella cupped my face in her hands and gave me a sad smile. "This isn't all about me."

"It isn't?"

"I'd like to think that I'm not _that_ selfish," Bella replied. She released me and ran her hands down my neck, pressing her palms against my chest. "Mom always used to tell me to be careful what I wished for. I guess those words are coming back to haunt me now."

"It wasn't entirely up to you at the time," I replied. I stared at her, trying to read her thoughts by strength of will alone.

"Well no," Bella nodded her acceptance. "We both had our reasons."

"Two," I commented as I reached up and rubbed her bottom lip with my thumb.

"What?"

"I had two reasons," I said.

"What was the first?" Bella asked, fascinated.

"Because you told me to," I said, my gaze fixating on her lips as she kissed the pad of my thumb. I withdrew my hand before we could get too distracted.

"And what was the second?"

"I'll save that for another time," I said.

"Hmmm," Bella nodded at this in a way that told me she was not going to let the matter drop but was prepared to bide her time. "In any case, here we are, I got what I wanted, but at a huge price." Bella indicated the house behind me with a jerk of her chin. "Everyone on campus is going to be watching you now wondering what you're all going to do; all because I couldn't stay in the car for a few minutes more."

"We can move on," I reassured her, but Bella shook her head.

"I don't want the family to move because of me," Bella rubbed her palms on my shirt, stopping when the gesture ripped the fabric. Her face crumpled as she plucked at the tear, trying to fix what she had torn. "I've screwed everything up."

"No you haven't," Rosalie said from behind us.

Bella peered around me to see the others standing on the porch, and then ducked her head against my chest with a sigh.

"It's just a little complicated," Jasper temporised.

"But nothing we can't handle," Alice completed with a gentle smile.

Bella shifted in my grasp and I slackened my grip so that we could both turn and walk back towards the house. Emmett smirked at our approach and I glanced down at my ruined shirt with a grimace, knowing what was coming.

"Tearing clothes off Edward already I see," Emmett commented.

Bella cocked her head and sighed at him. "Seriously, you're going to start those gags now?"

"Get used to it, there's plenty more where that came from," Rosalie matched Bella's wry smile. She caught my eye and raised a brow at my mild surprise. _Don't get too excited, Edward, but I think she's going to be okay._

"You know it," Emmett was looking pleased with himself.

"We'll see how smug you're looking when I arm wrestle you into submission," Bella replied in a voice that sounded too calm.

I rubbed my top lip in a bid to hide my smile. Like any newborn, Bella's moods and reactions were mercurial; her transition from guilt to sibling banter was a welcome relief given the circumstances. Bella glanced at me and moved close to put her arm around my waist. I put my arm around her shoulders out of sheer reflex, smiling when she insinuated her hand beneath my shirt. We both winced at the telltale sound of cotton tearing.

"Sorry," Bella apologised as Emmett threw his head back and laughed.

Jasper leaned against the porch balustrade and grinned at me, winking when I gave him a speculative look. Bella's mood had shifted and he was amplifying it to make everyone feel better. I gave a brief nod of thanks.

"So what happens next?" Bella asked.

As one, we all looked at Alice who gave us a sad smile before she began to speak.

o * o * o * o * o

For the last sixty years my family had worked at being unobtrusive. It was a process that had worked beautifully until now, but the situation we were in demanded new patterns of behaviour. I ducked my head and cut across the campus green in a way that would take me to my next class with hopefully the least amount of interactions. Bella's social circle was mercifully small, but I could still see heads turning to follow my progress. The sense of grief at Bella's death was genuine, although for some speculation was rife as to whether she had succumbed to the serial killer first or the flames.

People were expecting me to look grief stricken and I delivered; it was no act. Every day I had classes I had to leave Bella back at the house with the family, and it was hell. This was the time in her new existence when she was at her most vulnerable. Her impulse control was unpredictable and her thirst would feel insatiable until she adapted to our alternate lifestyle. Human blood would satisfy her in a way that animal blood never could, but such transgressions would be unthinkable. My phone beeped in my pocket and I dug it out as I walked, forcing myself to walk at a slow and measured pace.

_All good. B working her way through Carlisle's library, still bitching about her final paper. Misses you. A._

Sighing, I put the phone away. I missed her too. Every day we were apart I got back to the house to see Bella waiting for me at the end of the drive, nearly crying with need as she wrapped herself around me the moment I got out of the car. We were spending every available moment at the cabin.

"Does it ever stop? The wanting?" Bella had asked one afternoon when we lay naked in each other's warms, almost mindless with relaxation.

"No," I had smiled and kissed her. "Never."

_There he is. Edward. He looks wrecked …_

I looked up at 'hearing' my name and saw Angela watching me from where she stood. I ducked my head and kept walking towards her. I hadn't realised she was going to be back on campus today, this was going to be hard.

"Hey," she began with an awkward smile that wobbled as I drew near.

"Hey, Angela," I began, stopping when Angela burst into tears and threw herself at me. I had to remind myself to stagger back a step with a muffled 'oof' as her body impacted with mine. I put my arms around her with as much care as I could. It had only been a week but I had already adapted to Bella's new body. Had I really been able to be around someone so fragile for so long? Angela's body shook and I could feel her ribcage jerking with sobs.

_Sorry I'm so sorry oh Bella sorry all my fault Bella Bella Bella_

"Hey," I soothed, "it's not your fault." My words were meant to reassure but they only made her cry harder.

"How can you say that? Bella wouldn't have been there if it hadn't been for that psycho using my phone."

My shirt was getting damp with tears and I didn't want to think about what else. Angela got herself under control and fumbled in her pocket for a tissue to dab at her face. I reached out and patted her shoulder with just the right amount of awkward. Alice would have been proud if she had been there to see it, but she was at home watching Bella in every capacity at her disposal.

"They were the ones that did this, not you," I said. "How's Ben?"

_He's asking about Ben when he's just lost …_

"He'll be okay. He's blaming himself for this and-,"

"Angela, no." I took her hands in my own and held her gaze. "Please don't do this. You two have each other and that's the important thing here. Bella loved you both, and she'd want you to be happy." I swallowed hard at this. I would give Bella a full report on the conversation when I got home.

Angela's face was blotchy and streaked with tears, but she was blushing with life and to me that would always be beautiful. I hoped that Ben would always feel the same way, and made a mental note to have Alice watch for Angela as the years went by. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I ignored it, knowing that Alice would simply be confirming my decision.

Other students were giving us curious and sympathetic looks as they passed. Angela was getting herself under control, and on impulse I draped a companionable arm around her shoulders and steered her towards the building I had been heading for. Once inside I paused in one of the archways and released Angela to give her what I hoped would be a reassuring smile, one without too many teeth however, less it bring back unpleasant memories. Reaching up I brushed away her tears as carefully as I could. Angela hadn't known me to be overly demonstrative, although she had seen Bella draped over me often enough so she knew I wasn't adverse to touch. It was a human gesture on my part, one designed to reassure and comfort.

It didn't quite work.

"He was cold too," Angela said in a faraway voice.

"What?"

"_Him_," Angela's expression twisted. She hadn't known his name but the tone of her voice informed me of whom she referred. "He ran his fingers down my throat when he thought I was unconscious."

I pulled my hand away and shoved them in my pockets. Angela blinked and the colour drained from her face.

"There was something different about him," Angela went on, her voice growing stronger as her memory began to fill in the gaps, "something _wrong_."

"Definitely," I muttered.

Angela looked at me and then clutched at my sleeve. "Oh Edward, I wasn't saying that you're … I mean, your hands were a bit cool and it just reminded me of-," she broke off and shook her head. "I'm sorry."

"I know. You've been through a lot. Are you seeing anyone that can help you?"

"I am," Angela nodded and wiped her eyes. "Dr Cullen, I mean your Dad, referred me to a therapist, and Ben's going to see them too."

"Good," I soothed. "You guys need to heal as best you can."

"But what about you?" Angela looked distressed.

"I'll be okay," I offered her a slight smile. "We can get through this."

o * o * o * o * o

"I don't know how I'm going to get through this," Bella whispered against my neck.

We were standing beside the car, Bella with her arms around my neck as we simply held each other for a long moment. She twitched and snuffled in my arms, acquainting herself with the different smells that I had accumulated throughout the day. Angela's scent was mild but distinctly human, and Bella had flinched at the involuntary growl she had given when she had detected it.

"Angela's going to be fine," I told Bella in between kisses. "She'll heal in time."

"Right," Bella gave an unhappy nod. "Anything else I need to know about?"

"The police want to talk to me," I replied. "Its okay. Carlisle and Jasper will come with me."

"Why would … oh. Carlisle for the father-figure authority, and Jasper who help with the mood."

I nodded. Once again Bella had cut to the chase and assessed the situation.

"And I get to stay here. Again." Bella said with gloomy relish. "This really blows."

"I know, and I've been thinking about that," I said. "We're moving."

"What?"

"You and I. We're leaving. We'll go to Europe and lose ourselves for a few years. Jasper can arrange a new name and passport for you." I rested my hands on Bella's hips as I spoke, feeling a surge of excitement as I outlined the plan I had been developing over the last few days. Bella nodded as I spoke, seemingly entranced with the notion until her expression clouded and she shook her head. "What?"

"It's too much. I can't ask the family to give everything up for me."

"They won't be. It'll be just us for a while until the others join us in a few years."

"What about college?"

"So I'll flunk out. No-one will be surprised, and it's not like I don't have enough degrees already."

"You're giving up so much," Bella said, although her protest sounded weak to both of us.

"Compared to you giving up your humanity for me? This doesn't even begin to compare, but I'll spend the rest of forever making it up to you."

Bella pursed her lips as she considered my words and then stepped back, pulling me with her as she turned and began to walk with elaborate casualness in the direction of the cabin. I alternated between looking ahead and then looking at Bella's face. She was looking pleased with herself, and I didn't know if that pleased or worried me.

"Bella?"

"Just thinking," she waved away my concern.

The cabin was in sight now, and Bella gave a pleased hum when we were inside. Without another word she turned and began to unbutton my shirt. It took her a while. Her control was improving daily but she still managed to snap a couple of buttons as she worked.

"Sweetheart?"

She pushed my shirt aside and kissed my chest, licking and nipping at the skin in a way that had me closing my eyes and running my hands down her sides to cup her bottom.

"So here's the thing," Bella breathed as she busied herself with helping me off with my shirt.

"Mmm?" I gazed at her, heavy lidded as I reached out to help her with her own shirt. It seemed only fair, and fortunately Bella seemed to agree.

"What you said earlier about leaving."

That had my full attention, and I paused in the action of slipping her bra straps off her shoulders.

"Did you say making up, or making out?"

I smiled at her as relief washed through me. Perhaps leaving wasn't the best solution, but spending time apart from my newborn mate was unacceptable to me. Perhaps Bella was beginning to feel the same way.

"Whichever you prefer," I assured her in a grave tone.

"Ah," Bella shimmied out of the scraps of lace and then pressed her naked chest against mine, "well why don't we try the making out option first and then take it from there?"

Later she made a soft growling noise and sank her teeth into my neck as we rocked and stroked our way towards bliss.

o * o * o * o * o

The next few days progressed much as Alice has predicted. I had attended the police station to give statements and verify my whereabouts. My presence was a formality at best, as Angela and Ben had both attested that Bella arrived on the scene alone. Carlisle had embodied fatherly concern and stately grief, and Jasper had quietly stood to one side projecting sincerity.

A few days later I was at Angela and Bella's apartment meeting the two people I had both been looking forward to and dreading. Bella's parents had long divorced but had both appeared to collect her belongings and set her final affairs in order. Bella was a curious mix of them both; her easy acceptance of people came from her mother, Renee. Bella's astuteness when it came to observing human nature was clearly the legacy of her father, Charlie.

Renee had been wrecked with grief, sagging against her ex-husband and hugging everyone she came into contact with. Charlie was an entirely different specimen. A policeman himself, he had insisted on visiting the charred remains of the lab building, and meeting with the forensic team as if to reassure himself that the monster who had killed his daughter had likewise perished. I had no doubt that if there had been the slightest hint the killer had survived, Charlie would not rest until he had brought him to justice.

It was unbearable to be around them.

Renee latched on to me, asking as many questions about her daughter's final weeks as she could. Wanting to know the smallest details; what cereal Bella liked, what colour Converse she favoured the most, wanting to see the playlists on her ipod. She was desperately trying to create a living memory of the daughter she had lost, and it fell to me to fill in the blanks.

Charlie had perfunctorily shaken my hand and then simply stood and stared at me for a long time. When he was at last satisfied that he had my measure he had nodded and grunted once.

"Well that's it then," he offered.

"Pardon?"

"The boys on the Res told me Bella was involved with you," Charlie replied. "Young Jake wasn't very complimentary but that's rivalry for you."

"True," I admitted. "But Bella knows …_ knew … _ her own mind." It was an easy slip of the tongue to make, but Charlie accepted it at face value. Everyone was stumbling over past and present tenses when talking about Bella, as if believing she was somehow going to come back. If only they knew.

Charlie's moustache twitched as he tried not to smile.

"How long did it take you to work that out?"

"Not long at all," I muttered, thinking of how much Bella had challenged me in the early days.

"Hell, she was like that from the get go," Charlie mused. His eyes became shiny and he ducked his head in a way that made it feel like Bella was standing in the room with us.

"Bella does .. used to do that," I said.

"Huh?" Charlie squinted at me in confusion.

"The, uh, head duck thing," I gestured at Charlie as I spoke. "Whenever Bella got called out on something or she was feeling shy she'd dip her head just like that."

"Was there anything of me?" Renee had entered the living room where we had been waiting. Renee had commandeered the right to pack up Bella's bedroom and we had complied. Alice had already visited the apartment a few days earlier to collect a handful of books and sentimental tokens that Bella had requested.

"Your way with people," I replied instantly. "Before I knew Bella I saw her in the book store on campus a few times. Everyone that spoke to her always left with a smile."

Renee blinked rapidly at this and had pulled me in for yet another tight, quick hug.

"I wish we'd met you sooner," Renee whispered against my ear. "She sounded so happy when she talked about you."

"We were happy," I agreed. I patted Renee's back and released her, taking a step back to regard them both. "Your daughter was the most amazing person I've ever met."

"And stubborn," Charlie interjected.

"Impatient, let's not forget that," Renee added.

"Determined," Charlie went on.

"Funny too, remember her saying she wanted to have a chinchilla ranch when she was nine?"

The mood in the room began to life as Charlie and Renee listed Bella's strengths and faults. I stood listening to them and occasionally interjecting a comment of my own that reduced them to tearful laughter.

I felt like a fraud, sharing space with her parents as they mourned her, knowing all the while she was waiting for me a few miles away. My guilt was tempered with my own fascination. Charlie and Renee were offering facets and insights into the child that had grown into the woman I loved. The foundations of Bella's personality were known to them before Bella had even known herself, and I soaked up every word that was offered. Every word, every intonation, every mannerism they uttered was committed to my flawless memory so that I might relay it all to Bella when she needed it. Their love for their daughter would be the only tribute I could offer her come the day they were lost to her forever, just as they thought she was lost now.

It was hours before I returned home, and I arrived to see the main house quiet. Tilted my head, tongue flickering out to taste the air. The usual distinctive scents were there, although they were old. Wherever people were, they were away from the house and otherwise occupied. Bella's scent wove throughout the house as if she had been wandering aimlessly from room to room. I followed it up the stairs and knew where she could be as I reached the landing. I stopped tracking and simply walked towards my bedroom and opened the door.

Bella was curled up on the bed, trying to make herself as small as possible amongst the ridiculous number of pillows that Alice had provided. Her eyes were open and she wordlessly opened her arms to me as I approached. Kicking off my shoes I crawled across the comforter and wrapped myself around her. Bella rested her cheek against my chest and then jerked back as if scalded.

"Mom," Bella's voice cracked on the word. Her breathing became harsh and choppy as her chest heaved with sobs. She said nothing more, just curled into my chest clutching at my shirt. Her sobs became harder when she shifted enough to pick up Charlie's scent. In time she would question me about them, demanding details about our meeting, and I would be able to tell her everything. For now, I pulled her closer and rested my cheek against her hair as she shook and whimpered in my arms.

o * o * o * o * o

"We have to go."

Bella's voice was soft and I glanced down at where she was curled against my side, her head resting on my chest. We were sitting outside on the porch, on the same sofa where my family had once sat enraptured at the sight of a human curled up asleep in my arms. Had it really only been a few weeks ago? So much had changed that I could scarcely credit it. Alice had known of course, although the image of a golden-eyed laughing Bella had yet to appear.

"Where do you want to go?" I asked, my voice drowsy with relaxation. We had hunted earlier. Jasper had insisted that the more Bella fed, the easier she find it to stay in control. I had watched Bella swallow hard against her thirst at this, and had dragged her into the forest immediately. Bella took Jasper's advice as seriously as I did, and she fed enough to comment with a wry smile that she was almost sloshing as she walked.

"Away from here," she replied. "It's too much, Edward."

"I know," I admitted. "Knowing your friends and family are nearby must-,"

"It's not just me," Bella interrupted. "I'm talking about everyone else. Carlisle keeps worrying about me, Esme worries because he worries, Alice is looking at the future so much that she's not enjoying herself _now, _and Jasper looks exhausted."

I paused at this. She had a point. Jasper had taken it upon himself to lighten the emotional climate of the house as much as he could, at tremendous cost. It seemed that the only two who weren't affected as much as the others were Rosalie and Emmett. Rosalie had endured similar loss when she had been changed, channelling her anger into revenge. As far as she was considered the situation was one for Bella to deal with on her own merit. Emmett as always, operated on his loyal assumption that Bella was going to be fine. He took tremendous pride in his little sister, as evidenced by his constant good-natured teasing. Bella took it all well, regarding him with a kind of exasperated fondness that we all exhibited on occasion. She knew there was far more to Emmett than what he chose to project, although I think even she would have been shocked to see him dismembering James with calm discipline that spoke volumes of his inner rage that one of his loved ones was hurt.

"Are you sure?" I kissed her hair and waited for her answer.

"No. I don't know that I'll ever be sure of anything. Except you," she lifted her head up to offer me a quick smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "The sooner we go, the sooner I can start getting used to all of this away from all my other memories."

"Do you want to forget?"

"Never, but I want it to hurt less. Distance and time will help."

I closed my eyes at this, knowing she was indirectly quoting what I had told her in the meadow when I tried to leave her. Bella shifted against me and I took the opportunity to nuzzle her neck, inhaling deeply when she obligingly tilted her head back.

"Still good?"

"Better than good," I affirmed as I pressed kisses down her neck.

"I'd wondered," Bella mused. "I used to think it was because I smelled like a really good burger that you found me attractive."

"A burger?" I frowned in confusion at this.

"Something good to eat, whatever," Bella offered a lazy wave by way of explanation. The gesture made her pause and study the pale crescent shaped scar on her wrist. "Maybe that's why James wouldn't leave us alone. Maybe I smelled good to him too."

"All humans smell good," I admitted, "but you were …," I broke off and shrugged.

Bella shifted until she was able to look me in the eyes.

"You can't leave me hanging," she challenged. "I was what?"

"Exquisite," I smiled. "Delectable, beautiful, funny, charming, warm, shall I go on?"

"Uh no, you can stop now," Bella smiled and ducked her head in a gesture that signalled her embarrassment in the same way that her blushes used to. "I just thought that level of appeal might have changed now that I'm not human."

"Bella, there's no-one else for me, there never will be." I gazed at her until she bit her lip and had to look away from the strength of my regard. "The other reason," I said suddenly.

"What?"

"I said there was a second reason for changing you."

"Right, and what was it?"

"Because I wanted you," I said in a gentle voice, "more than I've ever wanted anything."

"So when I was asking you to change me why did you hesitate?"

"Because I didn't think I deserved you. Even though you accepted what I was I felt guilty about condemning you to this existence."

"I came willingly," Bella argued.

"Oh really? And what about the last few days," I asked.

"That's … it's … I'm adjusting," Bella said at last. "It's hard." She drew in a shaky breath. "It's incredibly hard, realising that I've had to let everyone go without saying goodbye. "

I could think of nothing to say at this point, but Bella continued.

"Then I look at you, and I'm home." She leaned closer and brushed her lips over mine in a gentle kiss. The porch was silent but for the sounds of two people rearranging themselves into a comfortable position, as tightly entwined as it was possible to be and still remain decent.

The sky was growing darker now and I could see the faint pinpricks of the evening stars beginning to twinkle. Bella's scent wove itself around me and I closed my eyes to map its complexity anew. When she had been a human her scent had triggered a thirst like nothing I had ever known, and she had been my true north ever since. No matter where I was I could always align myself unerringly to where she was. Even when the wolves had thought to spirit her away I had followed them until she was back in my arms. Now her scent was every bit as appealing, but not instead of thirst it brought me only peace. I could never have had one without the other.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I ventured after a long moment of silence.

Bella's shoulders shook with amusement.

"Somehow I don't think that's the first time you're going to say that. Maybe I should set up a savings account."

"There are benefits to that arrangement," I mused, "think of the compound interest over the decades."

"True," Bella nodded slowly as if awed with the thought.

I was about to offer something more when I heard something inside.

"Carlisle's excited," I said in a mild tone, "he's coming outside to tell us about it."

True to my word, Carlisle appeared a moment later lit up with the joy of discovery.

"My research is paying off," he said as he approached and sat down opposite us.

"Edward just told me," Bella replied.

"Oh, you mean you know?" Carlisle's smile faltered. _But I wanted to be the one …_

"Only that you were pleased with yourself," I explained, not wanting to steal his thunder.

"Ah." _My apologies, Son._

I inclined my head and gestured for him to continue.

"I've been studying as many records as I can, trying to find out what our kind may have written about singers," Carlisle resumed as he gave me a swift nod of thanks.

"You have written records?" Bella was surprised.

"Not many," Carlisle admitted, "but there are … avenues of study that are available to a privileged few."

"But I thought that paper records would … wait, are you talking about an oral history?"

"Correct," Carlisle said, impressed. _She has_ _a refined sense of insight. Edward, I think we're seeing the first glimpses of what Bella's gift may be._ "With our perfect recall it makes for an excellent knowledge store around the world."

"So what have you found out?" Bella slackened her grip on me to lean forwards as Carlisle spoke.

"There are indigenous cultures around the world that had oral histories before they had a written language. Still cultures still have a non-written language that's thousands of years old and I found some common structures that our people seem to have aligned themselves with."

Carlisle and Bella were both leaning towards each other as he spoke, each of them fascinated with the topic. It seemed that Carlisle was going to have a very willing pupil for the foreseeable future.

"The Australian aborigines have a strong spiritual connection to the land, and as well as drawing maps of the territorial lands that they call country, they have Songlines." Carlisle was all but vibrating with eagerness. I hadn't seen him this happy in weeks.

"Songlines," Bella repeated, sounding thoughtful.

"For the aborigines, Songlines create a spiritual map of country that take them to where they most need to be. In their case that was to water sources, shelter, good hunting grounds, or even away from danger. There were some areas of land that had good shelter and hunting, but the people got sick, women miscarried babies too often to be coincidence, and so Songlines were created that lead people around and away from those lands. It wasn't until recent times that uranium was discovered there. It took modern technology to find it, but the Aborigines already knew something malignant and powerful lay beneath the surface. I was reading this purely by chance and thought-,"

"Singers," Bella said in a faraway voice. "Someone irresistible to a vampire that has something they need like nothing else they've ever known."

"Exactly," Carlisle beamed.

"Edward can hear everyone's thoughts except mine," Bella suggested, "perhaps that's the clue. I can give him what no-one else can, which is silence."

I was frozen where I sat, considering the implications. Bella gave me peace. If I hadn't managed to resist her scent, hadn't gotten to know her and fall in love then the peace I felt with her now would have been forever out of reach.

"Fascinating," Carlisle breathed. "You're a natural shield for him."

"What about Emmett?" Bella asked. "You told me once that he had found his but killed her before the moment even had a chance to register."

"We'll never know," Carlisle looked sad for a moment.

"I think I do," Emmett said from the doorway and we looked up in surprise. He pushed the door open and wandered out, hands in pockets and looking surprisingly peaceful about the discussion. There was something different about him. I studied him before realising that for the first time in decades he looked relaxed at talk of his moment of indiscretion. "When I found her, just before I-," he waved a hand, "you know. She was happy. Contented even. All she was doing was pegging out her washing. I remember she was humming under her breath while she worked; no particular tune, she was just enjoying the moment."

"Was it quick?" Bella asked in a gentle voice.

"I don't think that the fact she was going to die even had a chance to register," Emmett replied. "I was on her so fast, and the taste," Emmett broke off and swallowed hard. I found myself doing the same. "It was so _satisfying_, like nothing you could ever imagine. Afterwards I felt different, you know?" This last comment was directed at me and I nodded in understanding.

"How?" Bella prompted.

"Calmer, better. More grounded."

"I always thought that the only way he could get more grounded was if we buried him," Rosalie commented as she joined us outside, followed by the rest of the family. "Sometimes I wonder if you could have resisted your singer," Rosalie said in a quiet voice as Emmett reached out to pull her against his side where he was leaning against the wall.

"It doesn't matter," Emmett reassured her with a kiss, "all roads lead to Rose."

"Contentment. So Jasper can control emotions, but Emmett is like an emotional barometer for the soul," Bella suggested.

Carlisle's eyes widened at this. _Of course. Emmett's contentment eased Rosalie's transition even more. This is-,_

"Fascinating," I whispered.

Bella was looking intrigued as Carlisle hunched forward to going over more of his findings. Everyone's thoughts swirled around me except for the woman in my arms.

_Perhaps we can teach Bella to strengthen her shield to include you, then you'll get even more peace and quiet,_ Alice suggested.

Bella looked at me with an odd expression.

"What?"

"I've just realised we've agreed to leave and now things are just getting interesting," she said.

"Nah, we'll give you kids a year or two for a honeymoon but then we'll come find you," Emmett scoffed. "It's too much fun having you around to be without you for long."

"Two years?"

"Maybe one," Emmett conceded. "Okay, nine months. Six, and that's my final offer. Damn, Bells, you drive a hard bargain."

"Six months of no bad jokes? I've died and gone to heaven!" Bella joked and then stopped to process what she had just said when Emmett boomed with laughter.

I looked at Bella who was laughing at Emmett now and exchanging quiet appreciative smiles with Rosalie and Alice. Jasper moved from Alice to Rosalie and then shifted to hover behind Carlisle where he sat, soaking up the emotional upswing like a sponge. Esme sat beside Carlisle all but purring with content at the sudden vibrant feel of _family. _Perhaps the whole reason I had become a vampire had been so I could live long enough to find Bella. Perhaps Jasper was right and that the universe had plans for even the likes of us. All I knew was that this was one the happiest days of my existence.

"I couldn't agree more."

**A/N: Ever since this story started, I've been wondering where on earth the title came from and how I was going to explain it. The very day I'd been thinking about changing the title, I had some cultural awareness training and there it was, 'Songlines' dropped right in my lap in a beautiful moment of synchronicity. **

**So this is very nearly it folks. I've got a little epilogue to follow and we're done. I really hope you've liked this journey, and thanks so much for reading. **


	26. Chapter 26

_Disclaimer: Fanfic only, folks – Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight._

**This is it …**

**Epilogue**

"Everything looks the same."

I grinned down at Bella who was standing at my side surveying the hustle and bustle of the first day of college.

"Look closer," I encouraged.

"I don't … oh wait, that's new," Bella pointed to an outcrop of new buildings in the distance, "and the trees are taller."

"There will be other changes, it's been nearly sixty years after all," I commented as I draped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close.

"Now I can finally get my degree from these guys," Bella nodded with a gleam in her eyes. We had attended many schools and universities over the years, but returning to this one made it special. It still rankled Bella that she had left her degree incomplete but there were after all, other pressing matters to deal with at the time. She had a different name now, but she had enrolled in classes that were near enough to her original course to content her.

"Where are the others?"

"They're getting here soon," I offered. "Alice said she has a surprise for you."

"Any hints?" Bella raised an eyebrow at my answer.

"Not even one," I smiled and kept walking.

Heads were turning as we made our way through the crowd, something Bella was still adapting to. Out of deference to her pleasure at being back on 'home turf' I managed to suppress my territorial growls, instead shooting a few quelling looks at the boys whose thoughts were too speculative. The situation was laughable, or at least it would have been if I had a sense of humour where this particular matter was concerned. Compared to myself and Bella, these boys were infants, eager to prove themselves as men.

I frowned as I considered this. My own level of physical maturity had been frozen at a similar age. My body would be in stasis forever, and I would never attain the kind of physical bulk and presence like Emmett. It was the same for Bella; her hips and breasts would never swell into the lush curves that came with pregnancy and childbirth. It was something that Rosalie would always lament and yet Bella seemed to accept it with grace.

"Just look at them, was I like that?" Bella murmured as a group of young women approached. They were all fluttering around each other, giggling and pretending not to notice the looks from the boys. Their laughter hitched as they drew near, the women parting around us and regrouping in our wake. Admiring comments and hushed giggles followed. Bella wasn't a mind reader but she knew enough to slide her hand into the back pocket of my jeans to cup my backside in a gesture of casual possession. I grinned, pleased to note that Bella wasn't above territorial behaviour herself.

"You were nothing like them," I assured her. Scent notwithstanding, she had been exquisite to me from the day we met. Her quiet assurance and easy manner with people had drawn me into her orbit like a compass pointing to true north. Years of self imposed isolation and social reserve had felt ingrained until I had seen her laugh and smile, and realised that I wanted to come in from the cold. She had kept me warm ever since.

The day progressed as expected, with the usual cycle of collecting schedules and sitting through introductory classes. This time around I was studying medicine. It wouldn't be the first medical degree I'd obtained, but there had been considerable advances since my original studies and I was keen to explore developments. I had also realised I had a deep-seeded desire to work with Carlisle, and the intervening decades of being with Bella had strengthened my control all the more. I would never be able to become complacent about my thirst, but if Carlisle could overcome it for the greater good then so could I.

Bella was waiting in the corridor outside my lecture hall, ducking her head and hugging her books to her chest as two boys tried to engage her in flirtatious conversation. She was leaning against the wall with her back to me, and I paused to watch as she laughed off one of the more outrageously flattering comments the boys had said. I knew she could take care of herself, but the light of interest in their eyes and the lascivious flavour of their thoughts had me moving towards her before I had realised the decision had been made.

"There you are," I murmured as I slipped my arms around her waist and pulled her to me, her back flush against my chest.

"Hey," Bella tipped her head back to smile up at me and my smile widened as the mental cacophony faded to silence.

"Oh, so this is-," one of the boys began. The speed at which their flirtatious smiles vanished was comical.

"Correct," Bella nodded once, "it was nice meeting you, maybe I'll see you around sometime."

"Sure," the boys looked at me and then their gaze slid away as they made a rapid escape.

"Did that help, me making things quiet?" Bella turned in my arms so that she could give me a quick kiss.

"Some," I allowed, "although it didn't take a mind reader to see what they were thinking."

"They were a little obvious," Bella laughed quietly as we began walking, holding hands, "I just thought if you couldn't hear it you wouldn't stand there looking like you wanted to rip their heads off."

"Hmmm," I replied noncommittal. Bella hadn't been able to see my expression when she had seen them off, which perhaps was for the best.

"Oh come on, I'm old enough to be their grandmother, and you _know_ I'm not interested," Bella chided.

"I know," I nodded at this and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Although one of them did smell kinda nice," Bella mused, grinning when I tightened my grip.

We walked on discussing our classes as students milled around us. The corridor was busy but as always the crowds parted around us as if my magic. It was something that Bella had nearly stopped noticing.

"I feel like I should have a dorsal fin sticking out the back of my neck," Bella murmured to me sotto voce. "It's like a classic example of fight or flight."

I grinned at her choice of words, mentally taking my smile down a notch when a fellow student flinched in passing.

"So where to next?"

"Alice wants to meet us near the book store, she said she has a surprise."

"The store is still here?" Bella looked at me with a grin of delight.

"After a fashion. You'll see what I mean."

Bella looked at me in confusion but I said nothing more. Alice had relented enough to show me a glimpse of what she had in store for Bella, and I was looking forward to the surprise.

o * o * o* * o

"Oh," Bella walked into the store and stopped short. What had once been filled to bursting with bookshelves was now a very steamlined affair. There were still hardcopy books available, but not in the quantities that Bella had been used to. Instead there were banks of LCD screens with USB ports where students could upload their purchases directly to their iPads.

"You've seen other stores like this," I said as Bella reached out to trail her fingers along one of the bookshelves.

"I know, I guess I knew this place would be no exception but I still hoped that might be something …,"

"Familiar?" Alice piped up, having appeared behind us.

"I should have realised you wouldn't be far away," Bella smiled as she turned and saw her sister. "So what do you have to show me?"

"I made a friend," Alice gave me a quick wink but Bella didn't miss it.

"Alice," she said in a warning tone.

"Want to meet her? She's really nice," Alice went on with an artless smile.

Bella looked at Alice and then myself in turn before sighing with amusement.

"Sure, why not? Neither of you are going tell so I might as well go along with it."

Casting a regretful glance at the store Bella allowed Alice to tow her outside and in the general direction of the parking lot. Alice had been quite specific on where I was to park that morning, going to far as to share me snippets of her vision. I had followed her instructions to the letter.

"Okay, so we're back at the car," Bella said when we were standing beside it. I unlocked the doors and we stowed our bags. Shutting the door with elaborate care Bella leaned against it and folded her arms, arching an inquiring eyebrow at Alice.

"Just wait, it won't be long now," Alice said. She was all but vibrating with eagerness. "Here she comes."

I followed Alice's gaze and saw a pleasant looking brunette making her way across the parking lot.

"Hey, Vanessa!" Alice called, giving a languorous wave.

The young woman looked up at the sound of her name and her face lit up with a smile of recognition.

"Where do you know her from?" Bella asked.

"She's in my design class," Alice said as an aside as Vanessa approached. It had only taken Bella few years of coaxing to convince Alice to venture into the world of fashion and interior design. Our sister had resisted for a surprisingly long time, but once she started peeking at future design trends the temptation had proved impossible to resist.

"Hi, Alice," Vanessa smiled and I saw Bella twitch as an old memory stirred. "How was the rest of your day?"

"Not bad," Alice shrugged, playing the part of student cool to perfection. "This is my brother, Anthony, and Marie."

"It's nice to meet you both," Vanessa dimpled.

"Are you waiting for someone? Can we give you a lift home?"

Bella looked in askance at me, and it was all I could do not to grin.

"Thanks but I'm okay, my grandma is picking me up," Vanessa explained. She turned and surveyed the parking lot as some cars drove past and then looked back at us. "Stick around and say hi if you want, she's really cool."

"I'd like that," Alice nodded. "Vanessa was telling me about her earlier today so I want to see if she lives up to the hype."

"Oh come on," Vanessa laughed, "I didn't talk about her _that_ much."

"No you didn't, but I'm intrigued," Alice giggled. Her excitement levels were growing and I wondered how she was managed to keep a lid on it without … A familiar scent and the scuff of shoes on tarmac had me grinning. Jasper sauntered up to the car with his hands in his pockets.

"Afternoon all," Jasper said with a sedate nod. Alice gave a happy peep and launched herself at him for a hug.

"And here she comes," Vanessa pointed at an approaching car. "Perfect timing Alice."

"Yes it is," Bella replied as she squinted at Alice who widened her eyes in mock innocence.

Vanessa stepped out from the parked cars with a laugh and elaborately waved the approaching car into a nearby vacant spot. The driver smiled and parked the car before opening the door and carefully climbing out. We waited as the older woman carefully brushed down her skirt and turned to face us.

"Hello, darling," she called to Vanessa. Her voice was a little husky with age compared to the higher tones of her youth, but the warmth and affection of her words remained unchanged.

"Grandma," Vanessa walked over and wrapped her up in a hug of greeting, "come and meet some of my friends."

"I'd love to, I … oh," the woman stopped short as she and Bella stared at each other. After a pause she shook her head with an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, dear, you just reminded me of someone I used to know."

Bella nodded, struck dumb with surprise. She went to speak but no words came out. Shaking her head she swallowed and tried again.

"I'm … I'm Marie. It's nice to meet you …."

"Please," the older woman said through lips that had gone pale, "call me Angela."

o * o * o* * o

"I can't believe you kept that a secret from me," Bella said when we got home.

"Are you angry?" I had watched her with concern when we had at last piled into the car. Jasper had opted to drive, Alice crowing with success in the passenger seat beside him.

"No, just blindsided. In a good way," Bella amended when she saw my face fall. She stepped towards me and put her arms around my chest, rubbing her cheek against my chest. "She's had a good life. Working as a photojournalist was always her dream. I'm so pleased it all worked out for her."

"She's been happy," I said as I kissed her hair until she lifted her face so that I could attend to the matter properly.

"Has Alice kept watch?"

"Now and then," I said. "Nothing obtrusive, just checking."

"Like she did for the others?"

"Like she did for the others," I confirmed.

"So if anything had happened you would have told me?"

"Of course," I replied, a little stung by the question. "She was a good friend to you, and a good person. We would have done what we could."

Bella held my gaze for a long moment and then sighed and nestled against my chest again. We were standing on the miniscule porch of the cabin as the sky drew dark. A mosquito buzzed hopefully around my head before giving it up as a lost cause, but other than that all else was quiet.

We had only come back here once over the years, and that was when Alice had seen that Charlie was dying. Bella had suffered and raged over the impending loss before Emmett had taken her out for a long afternoon of hunting and Jasper had offered to accompany us on the trip to make sure everyone in the vicinity would be safe.

Our visit had to be carefully negotiated with the Quileute tribe, who bitterly resented our return to the area. They still carried the scars of the James incursion, and Seth still carried a hefty scar across his chest. Fortunately the scar was all that remained, as Victoria had been dispatched, her over-confidence not preparing her for the prospect of a furious wolf pack that was experienced in dealing with our kind. After that they had enjoyed two generations free of shape-shifting, and our presence would disturb what Carlisle called their 'genetic peace'. Fortunately for Bella, Charlie was held in such high regard amongst the tribe that they decided it was an acceptable risk.

Bella had slipped into the palliative care ward of the hospital during the early hours of the morning when Charlie was at his weakest ebb. His system so heavily laced with morphine that it was all he could do to smile at her before slipping way from her grasp forever. Those were dark days after his loss. Bella had shuddered and wept tears that would never come for a long time after that. The only thing that could come anywhere near to coaxing a smile her had been my accounts of my first meeting with him.

"He really sized you up?" Bella had asked yet again.

"If I had really been a twenty-three year old I would have been shaking in my boots," I had sad with a solemn nod.

"If he said you were okay, that was heady praise indeed," Bella smiled, and I recognised it for the accolade that it was.

After our initial incursion the tribe had decided that the damage had been done. The next generation would be shape-shifters, which would account for fifteen years of human life. Time aplenty for us to return to our home and play the part of students once more. We would depart in less than a decade, and then the tribe could continue as before.

Jacob and Bella had sized each other up across the clearing, with a crosswind blowing between them to the relief of everyone present.

"Still a bloodsucker I see," Jacob had greeted.

"Does it smell like wet dog around here?" Bella countered.

To my surprise and relief Jacob had thrown his head back and laughed before gathering Bella up for a hug. He had released her quickly enough, stepping back with a gagging cough. A glance passed between us and he nodded once. He would never look at me with anything even close to friendship, but grudging acceptance was enough.

"Oh please," Bella looked equally pained, "like you smell any better."

Jacob had imprinted on a woman in the tribe and he was now father to a small tribe of his own. His life had moved on too, and it was good. We didn't stay long. The brief conversation was enough for each of them to establish that they were at peace with their decisions and life was good.

Renee had followed Charlie two years later, and we had travelled to the other side of the country so that Bella could farewell her mother. Open hearted and open-minded to the end, Renee had passed thinking that the woman she was talking to in her room at her bedside, was a beautiful fever dream. She had left her mortal life with a smile on her lips, and a devastated daughter pressing kisses to her temple.

o * o * o* * o

"Has Angela really been happy?"

"Perhaps not _all_ the time, but she's had a good life."

It was true. Angela had married and produced children, followed by three grandchildren of whom she was incredibly fond.

She and Bella had stared at each other for a long moment before Angela had offered a smile that had, to Vanessa's astonishment, turned into a delighted giggle.

"The Lord moves in mysterious ways," was all that Angela had said, surprising us all by stepping forward and wrapping Bella up into a tight hug.

"Grandma?" Vanessa had asked.

"Don't mind me, you'll be the same when you're my age," Angela had admonished.

Blinking rapidly, Bella had composed herself before pressing a quick kiss against Angela's papery cheek.

"And she and Ben are still together," Bella marvelled. "That's so great." She thought about this some more and then peered up at me. "Perhaps they were brought together by adversity."

"More than that. Ben had it bad for her from the get-go. As far as he was concerned it was never going to be anyone else."

"Seems to me I know a bit about what that's like," Bella breathed against my skin.

"Really?" I glanced down at her with faux innocence, allowing her to lead me into the cabin towards the bedroom. "Why don't you tell me about it?"

"You know, over the years what with you being a mindreader and all, I've come to realise that perhaps words are over-rated," Bella said.

"I can't read _your_ mind," I argued, standing passively as she unbuttoned my shirt.

"Not unless I let you," Bella countered, sounding smug, "and I think a little mystery is good in a relationship."

"That's all theory to Jasper," I said, prompting a breathless laugh out of Bella as I leaned forward to begin stripping her of clothes as well. Given her efforts to my person it seemed only fair.

"True."

"But getting back to what you were saying-," I reminded her.

"Ah yes," Bella sighed. Naked, she turned and crawled across the expansive bed, lying on her side and beckoning to me with a wave and gentle smile. "Perhaps I should just show you."

And after that, there was no need to say anything at all. No words, no thought, just pure sensation. Our lips met for a kiss, and I lapped at the seam of her mouth until she let me inside, into the rest of our forever.

**Fin.**

**A/N: And it's all over folks. I've loved writing this piece, my very first vampfic that turned into a bit of an epic. Thanks so much for reading, and I hope it has left you satisfied. Feedback is welcome, but not demanded.**


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